Incursion 2021 - Carnage Wrestling vs UGWC

[UGWC Staff]

Terra Skye: Welcome, everyone, to Incursion!

Covert Jay: HUTTAH!!!

Johnny Vegas: Hut-what?!

Nicholas Vinegar: Don't mind him. We are here at the Nationwide Arena here in Columbus, Ohio, for a very special event.

Terra Skye: That's right. We've got a hell of a night in store for you as Carnage Wrestling takes on UGWC, and whether you are here in Columbus, streaming on the Carnage Network, or watching on UGWC.com, we thank you for joining us tonight.

Nicholas Vinegar: From UGWC, I'm Nicholas Vinegar, along with our resident "ninja" Covert Jay.

Terra Skye: And representing Carnage Wrestling, I'm Terra Skye alongside Johnny Vegas.

Johnny Vegas: Let's get this shit underway.

“She’s Got the Look” by Roxette plays and the crowd has a lackluster reaction to it because, well, they have no idea who the music belongs to. After a few moments, the newest addition to the Chaos roster, Emily Gabbard, walks out flanked by her manager-advocate, Rex Norris. Some of the fans have a positive response given the nature of her immense beauty.

Johnny Vegas: Well well well look at this... 10/10 would recommend smokeshow!

Terra Skye: That’s Emily Gabbard, Johnny. Brand spanking new to CW and that’s her manager, Rex Norris. Rumor has it she’s being forced into this wrestling industry.

Covert Jay: What the hell do you peoplehave going on over there?

The initial positive response to her stunning good looks dissipates as she storms down to the ring with a scowl on her face, her body language full of every negative vibe one could give off. The aura of negativity oozes from her classy looking pinstriped professional business suit. Rex pops the ropes for her and she enters, her strides still purposeful. Emily looks around confused, not used to how things go in the wrestling industry, so Rex calms her down and grabs the mic for her. He wipes it down with some pocket size sanitizer and hands it off to her.

Emily Gabbard: Right. I’m Emily Gabbard. I don’t want to be here anymore than you people probably want me here, but I wanted to come to this goat rodeo in person to make an appeal to the roster, because this is actually important unlike this silly cross brand crap going on. I’m being forced into this stupid sport full of knuckle dragging meatheads. I’ve tried to pay for some wrestling training but I was met with nothing but molesters! Perverted men and even women. Disgusting! All they did was take advantage of me in the guise of “training”.

More jeers ring in. She’s insulted the sport of professional wrestling and now she’s making overblown claims against the passionate people who have paid their dues and want to train the next generation. Emily visibly gets the shakes, either angry at their response or nervous, possibly both. Rex leans in and seems to be encouraging her, so she calms down some.

Emily Gabbard: Anyway, after discussing things with my advocate here, Rex Norris, I’ve decided to offer one million dollars to anyone on the roster who is willing to become my personal wrestling trainer. You will be required to train me at my estate, under contract by me, since I can’t trust any of you heathens.

Johnny Vegas, Terra Skye, Nicholas Vinegar and Covert Jay chime in with their astonishment but are quickly drowned out by Emily’s screeching voice as she talks over the increasingly vociferous crowd.

Emily Gabbard: I know decorum isn’t a strong suit here in Ohio, but please, please show some respect for a woman. Unbelievable. Unreal. Anyway, that’s the deal. To all on the roster, just think of what that one million dollars can do for you. I mean, there’s GOT to be plenty on the roster who are down in the dumps or hurting for cash. You’re wrestlers after all. And you’re employed by a fancied up dumpster of a business model here in Carnage *gets hillbilly voice all of a sudden* RASSLIN’.

More jeers pour in, peppering the gorgeous but contemptible woman.

Emily Gabbard: But wait, there’s more. I’m looking for a tag team partner so that I won’t get hurt too much. I will also offer this partner one million dollars, but you MUST be qualified as a great meathead fighter type who can beat up anyone on the roster. I need to collect 25 wins to get my brother's inheritance, so yah, you better be good and provide me with wins. The quicker I collect 25 wins, the quicker I’m out of this deplorable so called “sport”. I think it’s a win-win for everyone. If this deal interests any of you, contact myself or Rex Norris.

She scans the spectators being so unkind to her and sneers.

Emily Gabbard: That’s all I needed to say. Thank God that’s over. I can now leave you Columbus sweathogs in the dust. May all the bad things that can happen to you happen tonight, Ohio. Ta-ta.

She discards the microphone with limp wristed disdain and makes a hasty exit from the ring and up the ramp, followed by Rex Norris applauding her and being as encouraging as possible.

[UGWC Staff]

Nicholas Vinegar: We are all set for the action to begin here in Columbus.

Terra Skye: I’ve been looking forward to this for weeks. Let’s get it started!

The first few seconds of "The Mob Rules" by Black Sabbath begins to play, and once “Whoooooahh, come onnn!” is heard, Hide Yamazaki bursts through the curtains, swinging his chains and forcing out a sadistic-sounding laugh.

MItchell Dennis: The following contest is set for one fall! Introducing first, being accompanied by his manager, Johnny Bonecrusher, the Deathwish, HIIIDEE YAAMMMAAAZAAAAKKIIII!!!

Soon after, "The #1 Hit-Maker" Johnny Bonecrusher emerges as well, keeping a good distance away from the wild man. He slaps his hands together and clasps them together sinisterly as he basks in the chaotic energies of his client. The swinging of the chains continues as Yamazaki makes his way down the aisle. Johnny then speeds on past, ducking under the chain "propellers" and stopping once he's at the top of the ring steps. Yamazaki throws his chains into the ring with reckless abandon, inciting the referee to shout at him, which accomplishes nothing. Johnny just smirks and shrugs coyly at the referee. He pries the ropes apart, and Yamazaki darts in between them, entering the ring in a wild staggering way fashion. Johnny then casually descends the steps and begins circling the ring.

Nicholas Vinegar: Hide Yamazaki only recently lost the World Heavyweight Title, that was last month at Ignition, prior to that he had been amongst the most dominant champions in our history.

Johnny Vegas: And now he’s the first through the curtain. My, how the mighty fall.

The lights go dim as the eerie voice of a former member of the notorious Manson Family rings through the arena.

"yeah, I
remember her saying:
I'm already dead... I'm already dead... I'm
already dead..."

The lights flicker revealing Casanova English on the stage as the voice continues.

"You're going to get up and scream. I'm
already dead... I'm already dead... I'm already dead..."
You're
going to get up and-
Burn an x in your head."

The lights turn back on as Casanova English takes a long drag off his already lit cigarette, his leather jacket hung loosely over his shoulders. He scowls at the crowd before Alex Ransom slowly walks from behind the curtains to join him - the towering man dressed in a suit.

Kelly Carmichael: And his opponent...the Carnage Wrestling Chaos Champion...Casanova English!!!

English and Ransom look at one another and smirk before walking down the ramp slowly. English stops to blow smoke in the general direction of some fans. Ransom walks over to the corner between the guard rails and the ring. English slowly struts up the steps onto the ring apron. He hangs his jacket on the turnbuckle before stepping through the second rope. English smirks pulling the cigarette from his lips, he blows a cloud of smoke straight up into the air and tosses his coffin nail into the crowd. English laughs as people move trying to avoid the ember. Ransom glares from the outside at Casanova's opponent.

Nicholas Vinegar: English in the Carnage Chaos Champion, and for our UGWC fans that may not be familiar, this is not an equivalent belt to our Chaos Championship, in our case Chaos refers to a division that competes under hardcore style rules, but rather in the case of the Carnage Wrestling Chaos Title, that championship follows similar rules as our recently introduced Conquest Championship, it is defended every week.

Johnny Vegas: You make it sound like Casanova is a pussy.

Nicholas Vinegar: How?

Johnny Vegas: It’s not “hardcore style rules.” Please. This guy is a resilient son of a bitch that never dies, like a fucking cockroach.

Covert Jay: Hide eats pencils.

DING DING!!

Nicholas Vinegar: Yamazaki aggressive right off the bell, unleashing a flurry of right hands on English, backing him right into the corner!

Terra Skye: Hide’s stomping Casanova down, he looks like a man who’s got something to prove here tonight!

Covert Jay: He’s a man fighting for pride!

Hazel East backs Hide away. Johnny yells at her from the outside to remember which side she is on, she shouts back that she is doing her job. Hide charges back at Casanova, but he shifts and takes Hide down with a drop toe hold, dropping him face first onto the bottom turnbuckle.

Terra Skye: Casanova is a smart wrestler, always aware of his surroundings, took advantage of an opportunity there.

Casanova pulls Hide away from the corner and covers, but Hide shoves him right off. Hide tries to rise, still woozy from taking a header into the turnbuckle, and Casanova puts him back down with a swinging neckbreaker. Hide again tries to sit up and get back to his feet, but Casanova plants him again with the English Lesson, and shoots the half into a cover.





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: Yamazaki kicks out!

Johnny Vegas: But there can be no question that Casanova English came to win tonight! Clearly Hide didn’t eat enough pencils in preparing for this one!

Covert Jay: To each their own.

Johnny Vegas: If it wasn’t clear, your man’s an idiot.

Covert Jay: We used to have a four man commentary team, but Hide ate one of them.

Johnny Vegas: Shit, really?

Covert Jay: Maybe.

Casanova brings Hide back to his feet and tries to leap into a triangle choke, but Hide holds his ground, deadlifting Casanova up and dropping him into a modified spinebuster. Hide’s hand goes to his own neck for a moment, collecting himself, and Casanova manages to get back to his feet. He goes for a kick to the gut, but Hide catches the leg and yanks him into the Wheel of Fortune. Hide holds the leg and kicks at the knee a few times, then pulls Casanova up and into a fisherman’s buster. He follows up with a cover!





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: English kicks out!

Terra Skye: Casanova is known for his resilience, it’s going to take a lot to keep him down.

Hide sets up for a vertical suplex and lifts Casanova into the air, but he safely floats off the back and lands behind Hide, shoving him away. Casanova knocks Hide down with a spinning heel kick, then springboards off the ropes for a lionsault, but Hide pops back to his feet and knocks him out of the air with a spinning back fist. Hide stumbles momentarily, then goes to pull Casanova back up, but Casanova springs off the mat and pulls him down into a triangle choke!

Terra Skye: Silence of the Lamb! Casanova’s got it locked in!

Covert Jay: It was the second time he attempted it, this time he got it!

Nicholas Vinegar: Casanova English has Yamazaki trapped in that devastating hold!

Terra Skye: Casanova won the Chaos Title with that hold, and he might be about to tap out the former World Champion right here in Columbus!

Nicholas Vinegar: Yamazaki is fading!

Terra Skye: He’s about to tap!

Nicholas Vinegar: But with a final burst of energy he reaches out and grabs hold of the bottom rope!

Covert Jay: Casanova can’t believe it, as the referee tells him he has to break the hold!

Casanova gets to his feet and questions Hazel East, but she points at the ropes and reiterates that Hide got there. Casanova shakes his head, but goes to bring Hide back to his feet and whip him across the ring, only for Hide to reverse it and send Casanova into the ropes. Casanova ducks under another spinning back fist and comes off the ropes again, but this time runs right into a kick to the gut, and Hide lifts him into a gutwrench powerbomb. Hide falters momentarily, but steps through the ropes to the outside and climbs the turnbuckle. He stands on the top and leaps into the air!

Covert Jay: THE HIEROPHANT!!!

Terra Skye: CASANOVA LEAPS OFF THE MAT AND CATCHES HIM BACK IN SILENCE OF THE LAMB!!!

Hide is trapped back in the triangle choke, and this time he has nowhere to go. He tries to reach for the ropes, but they are out of reach! Casanova shouts for him to tap, but Hide refuses, and again reaches for the ropes, but he can’t get there! Hide is fading, fading, reaches out again, but there is nowhere to go! He stops moving, and after a moment Hazel East has no choice but to call for the bell!

Kelly Carmichael: Here is your winner, the Carnage Wrestling Chaos Champion, CASANOVA ENGLISH!!!

Terra Skye: And with that Carnage Wrestling is on the board!

Nicholas Vinegar: Twice Yamazaki escaped the clutches of the Silence of the Lamb, but the third time was the charm for Casanova English. An impressive victory, no doubt.

Terra Skye: You’re pretty quiet over there partner, I’d think you’d have plenty to say here.

Johnny Vegas: I’ll save it for when Hide’s gone.

Terra Skye: Because of what Jay said before?

Johnny Vegas: It’s not worth the risk.

Covert Jay: Carnage Wrestling takes a 1-0 lead, but there is lots of action still to come!

[UGWC Staff]

Terra Skye: Good start tonight for Carnage Wrestling, picking up the win in our opening contest, and it is time now for the ten person tag team match, pitting five members of UGWC against five members of Carnage Wrestling.

Nicholas Vinegar: In UGWC, we refer to it as a cooperative match.

Johnny Vegas: Yes, well, seems like you folks do a lot of stupid shit around here.

Nicholas Vinegar: How do you figure?

Johnny Vegas: Well, for starters, I understand you call your Ultraviolent division “chaos matches.”

Nicholas Vinegar: So?

Johnny Vegas: That’s an entire brand for us. What do you have to say to that?

Covert Jay: We had it first?

“Invidia” plays as Donovan Hastings walks out to the stage, looking out at a very mixed crowd. He makes his way down the ramp to the ring, a particularly focused expression on his face.

Mitchell Dennis: The following contest is the five on five cooperative match, scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, the Lord of Pain, DONNOOVAANNN HAAASSSSTINNNNGGSSS!!!

Nicholas Vinegar: The 5-Time World Heavyweight Champion, Donovan Hastings is an icon of UGWC.

Covert Jay: And look here, tonight he is the captain!

Nicholas Vinegar: The self-proclaimed captain of Team UGWC, yes, but given his history and pedigree, there may be no more appropriate choice.

Johnny Vegas: You’re all worried about who’s the captain, our side is worried about winning.

The lights in the arena go dark. The opening sounds to "One Crazed Anarchist" by Fozzy come over the P.A. system. Once the drum beats start rolling, the lights flash in unison. Just then, the first words are belted out and the lights flash in a crazed fashion. Dave Rydell walks out onto the stage wearing his signature camo pants and boots. He has his face covered by the signature mask that reads "Your Virus" written on the forehead. He saunters down the ramp as the song continues to blare. He seems focussed and centered. He rolls into the ring and looks out into the crowd before removing the mask and preparing for the contest.

Mitchell Dennis: The Crazed Anarchist, DAVVEEE RYYYYDEELLLLLLLL!!!

Nicholas Vinegar: Nods exchanged between Hastings and Rydell, these two have been fierce rivals at times over the years, but they’ve also held championship gold together as a team.

Covert Jay: They also headlined the first ever UGWC PPV eleven years ago, Rydell was using his “Red Fusion” moniker at the time.

Johnny Vegas: Named after a crummy soda. You’ve got high standards here.

"Get Up" by All Good Things rips through the speakers. The shortish, somewhat stocky form of Carlson Rex steps to the entry. He turns to face the ring and stops. His attire is very simple. Black wrestling trunks, black boots with white ‘CR” on the sides and a black, leather vest, featuring the outline of the islands of Hawai’I over the heart. His Mirror Shades reflect the ring before him. After a moment of taking in the sight, he begins a deliberate but not too slow walk to the ring. The walk of a man who means business and intends to complete said business. He arrives at ringside and takes off the shades, sliding them into a pocket on his vest. He divests himself of the vest, handing it to one of the ringside attendants. He then ops onto the ring apron on his knees and stands to his just shy of six feet of height. With a quick duck, he steps between the middle and top rope and straightens up, still all business. He taps fists with Rydell, and tries to do the same with Hastings, but Hastings leaves him hanging.

Mitchell Dennis: CARLLLLLSOONNNNN REXXXX!!!

Johnny Vegas: Isn’t this guy called the Loser King?

Nicholas Vinegar: That was a short-lived moniker, Rex looks to have gotten himself on track as of late.

Johnny Vegas: Well that’s good for you guys, you’re going to need it.

The sound of a winding filmstrip can be heard as the arena is bathed in dim sepia light. A trumpet sounds accompanied by a spotlight emanating from the curtain. It backlights a man in a top hat, with a cane slung over his left shoulder. As a tinny voice begins to sing, the silhouetted figure moves along with the directions of the lyrics.

The music picks up some energy right as the spotlight switches to shine from the rafters, illuminating the grinning face of Montague Cervantes dressed in an elaborate jacket and a jauntily-cocked top hat. When the auto-tuned verse begins, "Listen to me, Listen to me" he starts making his way toward the ring, turning, flourishing, bowing, and two stepping along with the music.

Mitchell Dennis: The Showman, MONNNTAGGUUEE CERRRRRVANNNTESSSS!!!

Nicholas Vinegar: One of the bright new stars of UGWC, Montague Cervantes recently had a run as our Chaos Champion.

Johnny Vegas: And lucky for you he lost it. Lab Rat King would have wiped the floor with him. Probably literally.

Vinegar: Johnny Bonecrusher making his way down the ramp, and I think we know why Johnny's out here by now. He's been waiting for this moment for some time now!

Covert Jay: Hans has been waiting for this for some time now too and he's not even here tonight! It's just too bad there's that dark cloud over the whole thing due to Johnny's main client losing a minute ago. Not a good start for our side!

Once Rex, Cervantes, Rydell, and Hastings are all in the ring and settled, Johnny finally enters, asking for the mic from Mitchell Dennis, who hands it over despite Hastings demanding he doesn't.

Johnny: Ladies and gentlemen, the time has finally come. You've been waiting for this moment ever since you heard the announcement they became one of my latest clients. Hell, I'VE been waiting for this moment too! the UGWC has NEVER been this divine! Tonight, we ALL have the honour and privilege to behold their in-ring Coalition debut, and at an INCREDIBLY important event, stepping up at the last minute when Ms. DuMore announced she couldn't compete. So... not to take up any more of your time, get ready: you're about to be in the presence of APHRODITE! INCARNATE! Standing at 5'10", weighing in tonight at 138 lbs., your newest obsession... ATARA... THEEEEEEMIIIIISSSSS!!!!!

Hello Doves appears briefly on screens over the arena in pink accompanied by Atara's voice saying the same over the arena PA right before her theme hits the speakers. The crowd pops like crazy. Arena lights start to pulse in time with the music and multiple vertical streams of pyro erupt across the front of stage. Strutting with purpose, Atara emerges from the back taking spot at centerstage right before the ramp. Posing for the camera, a wink and kiss is given to the viewers at home. Johnny claps energetically in the general direction of his client.

Grunge walking to the ring steps, Atara stops at the top and postures once more for the fans. Johnny holds the ropes for her to enter, going to the middle of the apron where she blows yet another kiss to the camera before entering the ring. Johnny shakes her hand before exiting the ring.

Johnny Vegas: This is all well and good, but it’s time for the winning team to come out.

The lights die down as the crowd falls silent. "True Survivor" beats over the loudspeakers as blue spotlights highlight the stage. Running out to the beat of the music comes Sebastian Hawke, all smiles. Waving at the people closest to him, Sebastian gets a running start and heads down the ramp at full speed. With a leap, Hawke jumps onto the apron and jumps over the top rope, landing inside the ring while doing his best superhero landing, a confident smile still on his face.

Kelly Carmichael: Now introducing Team Carnage Wrestling, first to the ring...SEBASTIAN HAWKE!!!

Johnny Vegas: I can’t believe this little shit is going to be the one that embarasses your big and bad Immortal Lord.

Terra Skye: Sebastian Hawke is a former Chaos Champion, he’s ready to bring the fight tonight.

Covert Jay: He’s displayed the talent of an upcoming ninja for sure.

“Shoot to Thrill” by AC/DC starts to play as Dominick Strife joins Hawke at the bottom of the ramp.

Kelly Carmichael: Introducing next...hailing from White Marsh, Maryland...DOMINICK STRIFE!!

Terra Skye: Strife and Hawke have had each other’s backs in the past, a perfect pair to be a part of this team

Blackout.

A fast paced honking begins and the lights strobe between orange, green, and white as 'Toilet' by Clown Core plays furiously briefly before silence meets darkness.

When the drumsticks collide, a spotlight shines on Undead Ed held upright by ropes ala marionette, 'playing' a horn(he is dead) for a second before a single balloon flies from each turnbuckle summoning the breakdown.

Lights drop and the strobes blare faster, spotlight searching the crowd. When the music stops and a horn honks, Ragdoll is caught in the light and she poses briefly. When the music picks back up and it loses her again before catching her before the next horn where she poses again before the lights drop.

She rolls into the ring with the beat change and lays face up, pretending to be dead, complete with a rose she holds sticking straight up between her crossed arms before rising creepily in tandem with the music and making her way to the corners to celebrate herself.

Kelly Carmichael: Next...RAGDOLL!!!!

Covert Jay: Well this is certainly creepy.

Johnny Vegas: You don’t know the half of it.

The entire arena goes dark, the entry way quickly filling with thick mist. Green digital rain appears on the screen. A shadowy figure appears in the fog. The music picks up as the digital rain forms the words ‘Ready…Fight!’ and Zach appears before the fog with a bright flash of light bright, his head bowed and arms outstretched. He looks to the ring and marches down the ramp. He hops onto the apron and ascends the corner post from the outside, throwing back the hood of his jacket and once again throwing his arms out wide. With hands on the ring ropes he cartwheels off the turnbuckle and down into the ring.

Kelly Carmichael: He is "The Game Changer"..."The Anti-Hero"...ZACH VAN OWEN!!

Nicholas Vinegar: I watched Zach van Owen’s victory over Zack Tyler last month at Act of Defiance, he is certainly a dangerous individual.

Terra Skye: That he is.

Nicholas Vinegar: One entrant remaining for the Carnage Wrestling team, and we understand that Zack Tyler will not be here tonight.

Johnny Vegas: He won’t, but that’s okay, because we have a replacement!

Covert Jay: Who?

Johnny Vegas: Put him in, coach!

Nicholas Vinegar: You’ve got to be kidding me.

The lights lower a little to the opening baseline of his music.

On 'Feel The Funk Blast' a single red pyro goes off.

Covert Jay: It can’t be!

Johnny Vegas: IT IS!

Kelly Carmichael: And finally...the Adversary...DUNCAN RYDER!!!

Duncan Ryder strides out onto the stage. He takes one look around the arena then fixes his eyes on the ring. He descends the ramp, slapping outstretched hands but never taking his eyes of his target. He slides into the ring under the bottom rope and gets to his feet.

Nicholas Vinegar: Duncan Ryder walked away from UGWC at Infinity! He took his ball and went home! You mean to tell me that Duncan Ryder is the person who has been giving information about our roster to Carnage Wrestling?

Johnny Vegas: He’s come for his revenge, and it’s being served cold!

The two teams face off in the ring, with Hastings in particular outraged at the presence of Ryder. It looks like the two sides are about to come to blows, but the referee steps between and orders both sides to back off.

Terra Skye: Ed Hawkersby is a no-nonsense official, he isn’t going to let this fall apart right out the gate.

Covert Jay: Good luck with that.

Terra Skye: If anybody can maintain order in this match, it’s Ed.

Covert Jay: Well I read ahead, and *spoilers on* but it’s going to fall apart.

Johnny Vegas: You “read ahead???”

Covert Jay: To steal a phrase from our team captain, some things are inevitable.

DING DING!!!

Nicholas Vinegar: Match officially underway, looks like it’s going to be Dominick Strife starting things off against Donovan Hastings.

After a bit of trash-talking on both sides, things formally get underway with a double elbow tie-up. Hastings tries to transition to a hold, but Ryder calls it out from the apron and Strife is able to counter. Each successive attempt to transition by Hastings is called out by Ryder, enabling Strife to counter, until Hastings gets frustrated and catches him with a back elbow that staggers him.

Nicholas Vinegar: Hastings is frustrated with Ryder, I’m still shocked that he’s here.

Johnny Vegas: The secret weapon is already paying dividends! You guys are going down!

Hastings glaring at Ryder gives Strife time to recover, and he delivers a pele kick that sends Hastings back into the Carnage corner. Strife charges in for a knee, but Hastings steps out of the way, with Hawke making a tag as Strife crashes into the corner. Hastings turns around as Hawke springboards into a flying clothesline! Hawke goes right into the cover!





ONE!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: Quick kick-out by Hastings!

Johnny Vegas: But this little shit has him out-classed already, you just watch.

Hastings gets to his feet, but Hawke greets him with a series of chops, only for Hastings to respond with a knee to the chest, and drops him with a Facebreaker DDT!

Terra Skye: Sounded like Duncan was trying to warn him there, but Sebastian couldn’t counter in time.

Covert Jay: Even the most agile of ninja takes a misstep now and again.

Hastings tags out to Rydell, who comes in and waves Hawke back to his feet, setting up the Virus of Life, but Ryder calls out the move and Hawke shoves Rydell away before he can hit it. Rydell comes off the ropes and charges for the Tip of the Spear, but Ryder calls that too and Hawke sidesteps before coming off the ropes himself and connecting with Hawke’s Landing! He covers!





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: Rydell kicks out!

Terra Skye: But Duncan Ryder continues to keep the Carnage team a step ahead of Team UGWC!

Johnny Vegas: I love this guy!

Hawke tags out to Zach van Owen, meanwhile Hastings shouts at Rydell and waves him over, and he wants back in himself. Hastings tags in, but upon entering the ring immediately points at Ryder and tells him to come do it himself. Ryder smirks and puts out his hand, and after a moment of consideration Van Owen obliges him. Ryder enters the ring and starts to approach Hastings, who immediately tags out to Atara Themis.

Johnny Vegas: Coward!

Covert Jay: No, it’s a strategy! Hastings not only got Duncan off the apron, he put him in the ring with someone he isn’t familiar with!

Atara ducks under a clothesline from Ryder, and unleashes a flurry of boxing punches and kicks, culminating in a mighty front kick that sends him sprawling. Atara looks to follow up with the Judgement of Paris, but Ryder manages to get his hands up and partially deflect it at the last moment. She is undeterred, tilt-a-whirling and taking him down into a Fujiwara Armbar.

Covert Jay: Lament of Adonis!

Terra Skye: But it’s not fully locked in, and Ryder is able to to twist his body, counter into a crucifix pin!





ONE!!!




TWO!!!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: Themis kicks out!

Terra Skye: And Duncan dives right to the corner and makes a tag to Ragdoll!

Ragdoll rushes into the ring as Atara is getting back to her feet, and Ragdoll runs right into the Judgement of Paris! She staggers but stays on her feet, and Atara builds up steam and charges for a second, but Ragdoll counters and floors her with a lariat! Ragdoll spins and honks Hastings on the nose as he stands on the apron, and he looks irritated immediately. A ripcord knee to the face puts Atara back on the mat, and Ragdoll spins back to the UGWC corner and honks Carlson Rex on the nose this time, but as she turns away immediately kicks back through the ropes with her leg and catches him right in the groin.

Nicholas Vinegar: Certainly an interesting individual you’ve got there.

Covert Jay: I think I like her.

Nicholas Vinegar: You would.

Ragdoll charges at Atara as she is rising, but Atara snaps to her feet and catches Ragdoll in an overhead belly to belly throw. Atara dives and makes a tag to Montague Cervantes, but as he comes into the ring Ragdoll rises to her feet in an exaggerated puppet fashion.

Nicholas Vinegar: That certainly is creepy.

Terra Skye: You don’t know the half of it.

Cervantes appears impressed by the performance, nodding his head and giving her a gentle golf clap. Ragdoll tags out to Zach van Owen, who goes right after Cervantes, but the Showman ducks under a clothesline and runs toward the ropes, then ascends them like he's running up steps, springing off the top rope for a backflip kick. Cervantes goes right into a cover, but Van Owen kicks out right away. Van Owen springs to his feet and unleashes a Blitz Rush on Cervantes, staggering him, and then whips him towards a neutral corner. Van Owen follows after him, but Montague swings out from one side of the turnbuckle, rebounds off the ring steps then grabs the ropes on the opposite side of the turnbuckle and swings in for the Carousel Kick.

Terra Skye: Cervantes pausing to take a bow, might not be smart to be this flashy in the ring with someone like Zach van Owen.

Covert Jay: Monty is a Showman.

Johnny Vegas: And Van Owen is a Game Changer.

Cervantes turns his attention back to Van Owen and charges, but Van Owen catches him in Chrono Cross. Van Owen follows up with the Keyblade and covers!





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: Cervantes kicks out!

Johnny Vegas: Told you. Van Owen turned that shit around on him quick.

Covert Jay: That goes both ways.

Zach van Owen: GET OVER HERE!!!!

Cervantes is rising, and Van Owen goes to attack, but Cervantes catches him with a crescent kick and collapses to the mat. Both men are down, and after a few moments both begin crawling towards their corners. Cervantes dives and makes a tag to Carlson Rex, with Van Owen tagging Dominick Strife a moment later. Rex knocks Strife down with a series of clotheslines before putting him in a hammerlock and lifting him into Hammer the Nail. Rex covers…





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: Strife kicks out!

Covert Jay: And look at Ragdoll!

Terra Skye: Ragdoll dangling over the ropes like a puppet, Carlson Rex looking completely spooked by it!

Johnny Vegas: Well, he remembers what she just did to him a few minutes ago.

The momentary distraction gives Strife time to recover, and he attacks Rex with a series of knife edge chops, before sending him into the Carnage corner. Strife comes in with a step-up knee, and brings Rex out of the corner with a bulldog. Ed Hawkersby signals that a tag was made, and Ryder comes into the ring and brings Rex back into the corner, thrusting his shoulder repeatedly into his chest. Ryder tags Sebastian Hawke, and Hawke comes into the ring and stomps Rex down. Hawke uses a snapmare to send Rex rolling back towards the center of the ring. Hawke springboards off the ropes and twists in the air towards Rex, but Rex catches him in the air and snaps him down into a German suplex!

Covert Jay: And lo, observe the clash of one ninja and another!

Johnny Vegas: Sweet fuck you’re annoying to sit next to.

Terra Skye: I can relate to the sentiment.

Rex rolls towards the UGWC corner, dives and makes a tag to Hastings! The Lord of Pain hurries into the ring and pounces on Hawke before he can recover, lifting him directly into Destiny’s Call! Hastings covers!





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: Ragdoll breaks up the cover!

Rydell rushes into the ring to attack her, with Dominick Strife coming in to counter him, and within moments all members of both teams are brawling in the ring.

Covert Jay: Told you.

Johnny Vegas: Pull that towel tighter around your head.

Ed Hawkersby is trying to restore order to no avail, and the combatants begin to spill to the outside, all brawling at the bottom of the ramp. Montague Cervantes is left in the ring, and he runs up a turnbuckle to the top, pausing for a mighty hand flourish before leaping into the air and splashing onto the group, taking out nearly everybody all at once. Hastings is left standing, and he grabs hold of Duncan Ryder and flings him into the steel steps before shoving him into the ring. Ryder rolls towards the center of the ring as Hastings slides in after him, and Hastings goes to one knee next to Ryder and rains blows upon him.

Nicholas Vinegar: Hastings punishing Ryder for what he views as a betrayal to UGWC!

Terra Skye: But Sebastian Hawke is back in behind Hastings, who doesn’t see him!

Nicholas Vinegar: Hastings pulled into a roll-up!





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





THREE!!!!!!!





Kelly Carmichael: Here are your winners, TEAM CARNAGE!!!

Johnny Vegas: We’re up 2-0! Suck on that!

Nicholas Vinegar: Hastings is stunned, he can’t believe what happened, Sebastian Hawke caught him by surprise as he was focused on Ryder!

Terra Skye: Hastings and Hawke were both legal, that’s a fantastic call by Ed Hawkesby!

Nicholas Vinegar: It was the right call, but what a frustrating way to lose for Team UGWC.

The Carnage team celebrates on the ramp as Team UGWC regroups in the ring, with Hastings staring daggers up the ramp. Cervantes appears to say something to Hastings, who pushes him in response, prompting Cervantes to immediately shove him back with enough force to put Hastings on his ass.

Nicholas Vinegar: Tensions and frustrations spilling over for UGWC.

Johnny Vegas: Can you blame them? They can feel the night slipping away.

Covert Jay: And they’ll look to turn things around when Centurion takes on the Avenger, coming up next!

[UGWC Staff]

Terra Skye: Carnage Wrestling has taken a commanding 2-0 lead here at Incursion, as we come to our third match of the evening!

The lights go out as Bonnie Tyler's "Holding Out For A Hero" begins to play, with spotlights searching the rafters for the hero.

Where have all the good men gone
And where are all the gods?
Where's the street-wise Hercules
To fight the rising odds?

Finally every light converges onto the ramp, and the color turns to green with the symbol of the Avenger appearing on the video wall.

Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?
Late at night I toss and I turn, I dream of what I need

Right as Bonnie says, "I need a hero!", The Avenger races out on a stylish green and black motorcycle, with his logo plastered on the front. He circles the ring with it, passing by the announce tables and fans, before parking it back on the ramp and hopping off. He then leaps up on to the apron and darts up the turnbuckle, holding out a big thumbs up for the audience before jumping back into the ring to prepare for his match.

Kelly Carmichael: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first...the Carnage Wrestling Batlimore City Champion...he is the Savior of the Multiverse...The Avenger!!!

Terra Skye: The Avenger was triumphant in winning the Baltimore City Championship last month at Act of Defiance, he defeated Dominick Strife to capture the vacant title.

Nicholas Vinegar: We’ve seen the Avenger in UGWC before, he competed in the Massive Melee a few years back.

Covert Jay: He was the hero of the day.

"You're Gonna Go Far Kid" hits, immediately causing a pop from the crowd. Centurion steps out from the back and stands on top of the rampway, looking into the crowd and giving off one of his trademark smiles.

Mitchell Dennis: And his opponent, he is the reigning UGWC Cross-Hemisphere Champion and the keeper of the Global Challenge Key, CENNNNTURRRRIOONNNNNN!!!

The crowd pops again as Centurion walks down the rampway, pointing to some fans in the aisle along the way. He steps up the ring steps and holds his arms out, turning toward the crowd one last time before wiping his feet off on the apron and stepping into the ring.

Nicholas Vinegar: Centurion has been impressive since he won the Cross-Hemisphere Title last year at Horizons, including winning this year’s Global Challenge!

Johnny Vegas: But none of that compares to the pressure he faces here tonight. After he loses to the Avenger, UGWC will be down 3-0!

DING DING!!

Nicholas Vinegar: The Avenger calling for a test of strength to start the match.

Johnny Vegas: Well he is an idiot...and Centurion is taking him up on it, so he’s an idiot too.

Terra Skye: They struggle for a few moments, but Avenger gains the upper hand, applying leverage to his position!

Nicholas Vinegar: Centurion release his grip and executes a double leg takedown, holding onto the legs, looking to turn the Avenger over into the Fall of Rome!

Terra Skye: Avenger resisting, he manages to twist his body the other way and shake Centurion off!

Covert Jay: Avenger kips up to his feet, goozles Centurion!

Nicholas Vinegar: But Centurion knocks the arm away and drops behind the Avenger, pulling him into a schoolboy pin!





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: The Avenger kicks out!

Terra Skye: Avenger pulls Centurion into a schoolboy roll-up of his own, but transitions directly into a kick to the head!

Nicholas Vinegar: Snap suplex by the Avenger, kips up to his feet, waving Centurion to get up!

Terra Skye: Centurion stumbles up, Avenger has him by the throat and lifts him into a chokeslam! This could be it!





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





Nicholas Vinegar: Centurion kicks out!

Terra Skye: Avenger sets up behind Centurion as he is getting up, grabs him by the arm and head, floating around!

Covert Jay: INFINITE CRISIS!

Nicholas Vinegar: But Centurion twists his body and counters it into the 1000 Mile Slam!

Covert Jay: Modified version, didn’t get all of it to be sure, but a ninjastic counter by Centurion!

Johnny Vegas: Ninjastic? You just make shit up out here.

Nicholas Vinegar: Both men down, first one to their feet will have a clear advantage.

Johnny Vegas: So you either make up words or state the obvious. And you get paid for this.

Covert Jay: You guys get paid?

Terra Skye: Centurion and Avenger both staggering to their feet, and Centurion connects with a dropkick that knocks Avenger back into the corner!

Nicholas Vinegar: Centurion charges after him, runs right into a boot to the face!

Terra Skye: Avenger lifts himself onto the top turnbuckle, standing tall, here comes the Superhero Landing!

Nicholas Vinegar: But Centurion intercepts him in midair with the Bloody Symphony!

Covert Jay: And wastes no times following up with another 1000 Mile Slam, and he got all of this one!

Nicholas Vinegar: He’s got the cover!





ONE!!!





TWO!!!!!





THREE!!!!!!!





Mitchell Dennis: Here is your winner, the UGWC Cross-Hemisphere Champion, CENNNNTURRRIIOOONNNNN!!!

Johnny Vegas: ...fluke.

Nicholas Vinegar: It’s no fluke, Carnage Wrestling may have drawn first blood, even second blood tonight, but UGWC isn’t done yet!

Terra Skye: Congratulations to Centurion as UGWC gets on the board, but next up, things are about to get deeply personal, as JC and Trent Steel face off in what is sure to be a brutal “I Quit” Match.

Covert Jay: Don’t go anywhere!

[UGWC Staff]

Terra Skye: And now we're getting ready to see two friends going at it in an 'I Quit' match. 

Nicholas Vinegar: They've been going at it for a while now, ever since JC attacked Trent after his match against Kyra Johnson. 

Johnny Vegas: To be fair, Trent probably deserved it.  He always does. 

Kelly Carmichael: This next match is an 'I Quit' match!  First to the ring... Standing in at six feet, five inches and weighing two hundred and fifty five pounds... JC!!!!

The lights go out, bathing the arena in darkness except for a familiar dark shade of blue. A whistling can be heard on the speakers before the instrumentals kick in on Rammstein's 'Engel'. Blue pyro blasts from the sides of the stage and JC steps out in his trenchcoat, staring out at the audience.

Lights flash in the arena and he begins his walk to the ring, as the German lyrics can be heard over the speakers.

"Erst wenn die Wolken schlafen gehen

Kann man uns am Himmel sehen

Wir haben Angst und sind allein

Gott weiß, ich will kein Engel sein"

He enters the ring and climbs up to the middle rope on the side of the ring with the hard camera, staring out at the crowd again and raising a single fist into the air. He gets down and removes his trenchcoat, preparing for the match.

Kelly Carmichael: And his opponent... Standing in at five feet, eleven inches and weighing two hundred pounds... He is the 'Son of a Bitch', TRENT STEEL!!!!

"Bleed the Freak" by Alice in Chains starts to play as the lights flicker and go down. Out of the entranceway comes Trent Steel as smoke comes out of the entranceway. Trent runs down to the ring and slides in. He then removes his black oakleys with red lenses and his trench coat. He goes to one of the ring cornera and does a quick "Hail Mary". He then turns out of the corner and awaits the match to start.

Nicholas Vinegar: The tension is palpable. 

Terra Skye: No shit.  

Covert Jay: Let's get this shit started! 

The two men have a stare down at each other as Ref Jeff goes over the rules. The ref stands there with a microphone as the bell rings. Two friends. A bitter fight. One solution. Someone is gonna have to say they give up between these two stubborn bulls. One a man monster, standing tall over the smaller man, with more power, grit, and determination than in half of the professional wrestlers today. The other a smaller, faster, and more technically sound wrestler who has an inhumane tolerance for pain. The silence turns to excitement as the two men stare down and both...smile. RIGHT HAND TO THE FACE OF TRENT STEEL! Trent shakes it off for a moment and hits JC back with his own RIGHT HAND TO THE FACE! The two start picking up the pace with returning and sending more and more punches as this combined capacity crowd is up on its feet for these two former tag team champions are trying to take each other’s head off with each shot!

Terra Skye: Well this has started out just the way I thought it would.

Nicholas Vinegar: This is tame compared to what I thought was going to happen if I'm being completely honest.

Johnny Vegas: It just started, give them time. They'll be murdering one another before we know it.

JC backs Trent up into the ropes and attempts a wild haymaker, only for Trent to duck it and start to chop away at The Answer’s chest. He then jumps up and hits a dropkick that sends JC tumbling backward over the top rope and to the floor. JC gets to his feet, unhurt, and kicks the nearby barricade out of frustration. Trent jumps outside to join him and jumps off the apron with a double axe handle that knocks JC back-first into the barricade. He then hits him with a huge chop. JC lifts the knee up into Trent’s chest and then slams his face into the top of the rail, before moving back inside the ring and demanding they finish things in there.

Covert Jay: Well that's surprising. JC's ninjaing his way into having the match back in the ring.

Terra Skye: To be fair, that's the way JC's always been. He's never been as hardcore oriented as Trent is so it's not really that surprising, is it?

Nicholas Vinegar: When you put it like that, Terra - It's not surprising at all.

Trent gets back into the ring as JC runs over and goes to punt kick him in the ribs, but Trent grabs JC's leg and leg whips him down to the mat and drives and elbow into JC's knee! Trent then slaps the back of JC's head and kips up. JC grabs the back of his head more like a how dare you sort of action than pain and gets up charging at Trent and Trent ducks the clothesline attempt and kicks JC in the back of that right knee again. JC has had enough of these shenanigans and grabs "The Son of a Bitch" by his throat and just hurls him across the ring with Trent's head bouncing off of the turnbuckle post. JC runs forward and hits a "Dance Macabre"! JC then runs to the ropes and kicks Trent in the ribs just like he had intended just at the beginning of this exchange! Trent rolls on the mat and clutches his ribs as JC stomps on Trent’s head for a moment.

Johnny Vegas: Boring! Where's the fucking blood?!

Terra Skye: It's coming. With the way these two have been lately... Oh, it's coming.

Nicholas Vinegar: All I can say is that with JC's size advantage, Trent's going to be in a world of trouble if he doesn't stay focused.

Covert Jay: I think the more relevant question is, which one of these two are going to actually quit?

Trent rolls to the apron to put some distance between the two and catch a breather, but JC steps through the ropes and joins him, continuing to stomp on the head of his best friend. He then lifts Trent up and while the two are still on the narrow strip of ring between the ropes and the floor, JC wraps his arms around the waist of Steel and hits a belly to belly suplex ON THE APRON! Steel’s spine lands flush with the edge of the apron and he flops down to the floor. Ref Jeff moves over to check on him and JC demands he ask if he quits, although he knows it’s too early.

Ref Jeff: Trent, do you give up?

Trent Steel (coughing): Your brother hits harder than you do!

Terra Skye: It's going to take more than that to make Trent quit!

JC responds with a smirk and runs to the ropes. JC leaps over the top rope and hits an elbow right into the chest of Trent! He picks up Trent over his head and drops Trent head first onto the steel steps ala “Snake Eyes”. He picks up Trent and DDT’s him on the outside before rolling him into the ring. Trent crawls a bit in the ring towards the corner post and JC lets him. He reaches down and lifts Trent up. JC pulls out a trick from Trent Steel’s move list and hits an “Eradication”, crucifix powerbomb into the turnbuckle post on Trent! Ref Jeff holds up the microphone near Trent and Trent shoves it away as JC grabs Trent by the arm and violently irish whips Steel shoulderfirst into the opposing turnbuckle post! We hear a sickening pop as Trent grabs his right arm and we see it’s been dislocated. JC shakes his head and yells at Trent who flips him off. Trent goes to the turnbuckle post and sets up his shoulder for...HE SLAMS HIS DISLOCATED SHOULDER INTO THE POST TO POP IT BACK INTO PLACE! As soon as he does and shakes his arm for a few seconds he turns and gets shot in the face with “The Big Boot of Death” from JC!

Covert Jay: That's gotta be it! Right?!

Johnny Vegas: One can only hope.

Nicholas Vinegar: Wait, what?

Terra Skye: Johnny hates Trent. So... Take that how you will.

JC now has a target for his rage as he stomps right onto the right shoulder of Trent. He picks up Trent and grabs that right arm and hip tosses Trent back onto the mat. JC reaches down and Trent slaps JC’s face with his left hand! JC stumbles back for a moment as Trent gets up and knee’s JC in the face with a high knee to the face. JC stumbles back into the turnbuckle post area and Trent grabs one of JC’s arms and...CRUCIFIX PIN...DRIVING JC’S NECK INTO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE PAD!! JC drops like a sack of potatoes as Trent gets up and gets Ref Jeff to ask JC if he wants to quit.

Ref Jeff: You done dude?

JC: You’re gonna have to kill me!

Johnny Vegas: Don't tempt him!

Covert Jay: Yeah, really... Don't tempt him.

Terra Skye: With JC's history of neck injuries, I feel like they're playing with fire here.

Trent responds with his usual kindness...a kick to the back of the head! Shaking out his right arm to try and get some of the blood flow going again, Trent drops a knee onto JC’s face and then starts punching him with lefts! Trent picks up JC and tosses him into the ropes. JC hits the rebound and comes back with extra speed trying to break out of the assault he's been getting from Trent, but Trent leaps up and hurricanrana on JC! Trent wastes no time in getting up and grabbing JC. He sets him up for a sitdown piledriver that keeps the big man clutching his neck. Trent gets up and does a forward flip bringing the back of his foot right between the shoulderblades of JC! JC lets out a howl of pain as Trent heads up to the top turnbuckle. Trent sets up for "The Blackwinged Angel''. Trent leaps into the four fifty splash, but JC finds the strength to kip up and hits a standing "Big Boot of Death" right into Trent's face! Both fall down in the ring as the mixed Carnage and UGWC audience let out a gasp followed by a cheer from the in ring action! JC, after hitting the boot, collapses for a moment near the turnbuckle post as Trent rolls over onto the mat. We see a trickle of blood start to pour from Trent’s forehead as he tries to get up.

Ref Jeff: You give up Trent?

Trent Steel: Aha..Hahah...hahahah…

Johnny Vegas: Yes! He's bleeding! But.. He's laughing. Damnit. DAMN YOU STEEL!

Nicholas Vinegar: You're a sadist.

JC picks up Trent by the head and throws him over the top rope, apparently deciding to take it out of the ring. Steel staggers up to his feet only for JC to throw him over the guardrail and step over it himself. He grabs Trent by the head, trying to lead him through an exit to the back, but Trent fires off shots to his ribs to stop himself from being led. The two brawl near one of the exits and it looks like JC is getting the better of it, but Steel kicks the inside of JC’s knee to throw him off balance and then tosses him head-first into a nearby wall. Trent then grabs JC’s face and begins to SCRAPE IT ALONG THE WALL, back and forth, hoping to split The Answer open, or at least get him to give up. Ref Jeff is right there but Trent won’t let him ask yet. He looks at JC and sees that yes, a bloody scrape has formed on his forehead, so he throws him face first into the wall again and JC simply slumps down. Ref Jeff gets down to ask him, but JC puts a hand in his face and shoves him away.

Johnny Vegas: We've got some more blood! Yes!

Covert Jay: That's ninja blood... That's not real blood at this point.

Terra Skye: Are you serious? Good lord.

Trent grabs JC and runs with him, throwing him through the curtains to the backstage area, where they are near a food vendor. Trent motions for people to get out of the way, but in just the time it has taken him to do that, JC regains his bearings and kicks him in the stomach, before tossing him over the counter near all of the workers, who move to the back to get out of the way.

JC: Hungry, Trent?

JC begins grabbing foodstuffs and throwing them down on Steel, everything from bags of cotton candy to pretzels to plastic bags of nacho chips. He looks at the hot dog roller and pulls off the plastic partition that protects the meat from the public, and tosses it at Trent’s head as he gets up. It bounces off, but does little actual damage. JC then grabs Trent by the hair and slams him face first into the hot roller! Trent pushes himself off in pain.

JC: I’m sorry, let me cool you off!

He spins around and tosses Trent into a soda fountain, and holds Trent’s mouth open under the coke nozzles. He presses a button and the liquid begins to pour into Steel’s mouth, choking him almost instantly. JC continues to hold Trent there and continues to keep the fountain on, with more sugary soda gagging his friend. After he thinks Trent’s had enough, he lets go and Steel falls to his knees, where Ref Jeff leans over the counter with a microphone.

Ref Jeff: Trent, do you give up?

Trent Steel: I wanted a root beer you asshole!

Johnny Vegas: Wow.

Nicholas Vinegar: This has taken a turn I didn't expect...

Covert Jay: Rootbeer sounds really good right now.

JC grabs Trent and throws him straight into a trashcan. Trent rolls off of it as JC grabs another one and is gonna smash it into Trent. Trent slides forward and hits a drop toe hold sending JC face first into the downed trashcan and slamming his head into the one he was carrying as well! Wiping blood, soda, and facepaint from his face Trent gets up and looks around. He smiles a sick smile as he grabs JC and hurls him towards...THE MERCH AREA! Fans scatter as Trent and JC enter the area and vendors are screaming at them not to wreck their stuff. Trent looks around a replica belt booth and Trent spies it. He smiles. No he doesn't grab the UGWC World Title. Not the Carnage World Title. No...He grabs The Carnage Lillyass Title replica plastic belt! He plants it in the center of the table as the vendor grabs the rest of his stuff and high tails it. Trent grabs JC and lifts him up into a fireman's carry...PITTSBURGH NIGHTMARE THRU THE TABLE AND THE FAKE LILLYASS TITLE!!! Fans scream out as Trent picks up the plastic title belt and puts it on the downed JC and then puts his foot on top of JC's chest for a photo op! Dozens of fans hold up their phones to take selfies mid match as Trent does a double thumbs up!

Covert Jay: Now what in the hell is THAT?

Johnny Vegas: The only belt I've ever held, that's what. Actually, not to brag, but I'm still the champ.

Nicholas Vinegar: That can't be real.

Terra Skye: It's real... Unfortunately. It's real.

JC is not amused as he grabs Trent's foot and whips him face first into the concrete! From the area they are at JC can see the top of the stands for the fans and he grabs Trent by the throat and runs towards it. He slams Trent into the back of the cheap seats as fans clammer to see and get close to the action. JC gets behind Trent. One German Suplex! Roll. Two German Suplex! Roll! THREE GERMAN SUPLEXES FOLLOWED BY A RELEASE!! Trent goes rolling down the cheap seats down towards the midsection with JC right behind. Ref Jeff is certainly getting a workout tonight as he rushes down to ask Trent if he gives up.

Ref Jeff: You give up?

Trent Steel: Gimmie a hand.

Ref Jeff looks down and we see that from the falling Trent’s right shoulder has popped out of place again. Ref Jeff looks really uncomfortable as he pulls and Trent positions his body as we get another sickening POP! JC shoves Ref Jeff out of the way and kicks Trent right in the right shoulder sending Steel further down the stairs in the stands till they get closer to ground level. Trent is crawling on his hands and knees while fans pat him on the back as JC gets closer. JC grabs Trent’s leg. Trent gets to his feet, hopping on one foot,Enzuigiri! JC drops down to one knee as Trent grabs JC by the shoulder and falls back. Monkey Flip! Right into the back side of the barricade! JC grabs the back of his head as Trent gets up and hops onto JC’s back to get onto the barricade! Trent walks a tightrope for a moment on the barricade and then runs back...DOUBLE FOOT STOMP TO THE BACK OF JC’S NECK!

Terra Skye: Oh, that didn't look good.

Nicholas Vinegar: None of this looks particularly good right now.

Covert Jay: Isn't that the point?

Johnny Vegas: They can get to the murdering now, that would be great.

Ref Jeff puts a microphone in JC’s face but he is unresponsive. He’s also not moving as slumps over the barricade and lands at ringside. The referee stays in a crouched position with the microphone.

Ref Jeff: JC, can you continue?

But there is no response. Ref Jeff gets up and makes an ‘X’ sign to the back, indicating that one of the wrestlers in the match needs medical attention. Steel gets up from hitting the stomp and see’s JC isn’t moving. He rushes over and Ref Jeff tries to hold him back, thinking Trent’s gonna attack JC, but he shoves Ref Jeff out of the way and checks JC’s pulse around his neck. Trent starts to shake and tremble.

Trent Steel: NO! NO YOU DON’T FUCKER!

Trent throws his fists down in a double axe handle on the chest of JC, who breathes in a huge gasp of air and begins coughing. Trent seems happy that at least he didn’t kill him and Ref Jeff asks again.

Ref Jeff: JC, please, just say you quit.

JC: (coughing) Fuck. You.

He then punches Trent in the face to knock him aside and uses the barricade to pull himself to his feet, before waving his friend to come forward and attack him.

Terra Skye: JC's being stubborn, and given recent events.. I'm not sure I understand it.

Trent wipes the blood off his brow and off of his lips. He mouths “Son of a bitch” at JC and charges forward. JC hits him with a back elbow to throw him off, then grabs him and whips him into the steel steps. With Trent dazed, JC boots off the top layer of the steps and pulls the bottom row out. He then grabs Trent into a piledriver position, then lifts him up for the package piledriver he calls Schism. With Trent hanging upside down, JC demands that Ref Jeff ask him.

Ref Jeff: Um, do you, do you give up, Trent? Oh god, please say yes.

Trent Steel: I have not yet begun to bleed...

JC sighs and then drops down with the Schism, spiking Trent Steel head-first on the steps!

Nicholas Vinegar: Good lord! Trent Steel's gotta be out at this point.

Johnny Vegas: He's literally not. People have been trying to end him for years now and no one's been able to give me the satisfaction of seeing it happen.

Terra Skye: Oh come on Johnny... Really?

The Answer shoves Trent aside and lays on the steps for a moment, trying to recover after the abuse he’s taken. He gets up, and still holding his own neck, grabs Steel and rolls him into the ring. He gets Trent in position for another Schism, but Trent drops down and lifts up both arms to hit him with a low blow! It’s perfectly legal and it drops JC long enough for Trent to roll back out of the ring and look underneath. He places a giant sack on the apron and shoves it in, then pulls out a strip of barbed wire as well. Trent moves around and grabs the ring bell, before getting back inside the ring

Nicholas Vinegar: Oh no.

Terra Skye: Apparently it's going to get worse.

Covert Jay: Of course it is, Johnny's blood lust hasn't been satiated.

Johnny Vegas: YES!

Trent ties the bell to the side of JC's neck with the barbed wire wrapping it snuggly around JC's neck and forehead. Steel grabs a chair and opens it up, sitting down. JC is in pain just from the wire digging into his neck and bleeding still from the various wounds picked up through the match. Steel demands the referee ask JC.

Ref Jeff: Come on man, he's gonna end your career if you don't quit.

JC: That's what I WANT.

JC shoves the referee and rushes at Trent, who thinks quickly and drop toe-holds JC so that he falls and slams face first into the chair, which collapses under his weight. He lays there in a heap, trying to get the bell off the side of his face but the wire is dug into his head. He decides to leave it on for now and gets to his feet, but Trent has reached inside of the bag and pulls out a bottle of some type of liquor. It seems the entire sack is filled with bottles of alcohol. He heaves it at JC as he tries to get up and the bottle doesn't break, but bounces off his shoulder. So JC picks it up and teaches Steel how to throw, launching it at his head. Trent gets his arm up and it shatters on his elbow! JC moves forward and lifts Trent up onto his shoulders, spinning him around with a Solitaire Unraveling ONTO THE BAG OF LIQUOR BOTTLES! Some of the bottles break and some don't, but Trent is left on the mess writhing in agony.

Ref Jeff: Do you quit?

Trent Steel: FUCK OFF!!

JC then turns his back to Trent, and with the bell wrapped around his head and neck thanks to the barbed wire, falls backward and hits Steel with a headbutt! The move is enough to seemingly knock both men unconscious, or at least loopy for the moment.

Terra Skye: They've both got to be out.

Nicholas Vinegar: Nope, JC's getting up!

Johnny Vegas: Of course he is.

JC makes it to his feet and falls back into the turnbuckle. The fall has loosened the grip of the barbed wire so he rips the bell off of himself and throws it down to the mat. He picks up Trent and tosses him into the ropes. Dance Macabre! Trent falls back into the turnbuckle post. JC grabs Trent and hits another Solitaire Unraveling!!!

JC: GIVE UP!

Ref Jeff: Do you give up Trent? Please?

Trent takes a moment and starts to get up. He crawls over to the ropes and pulls himself up. He grabs the microphone and glares at JC. He's bleeding, right arm dangling almost limp like or dead. He smiles.

Trent Steel: I told you...I'm not quitting. You want me to kill you? You want me to end your career? Come on...I can take it. All the pain. All the hate. All the anger you got...and I can take more! SO COME ON!!! HIT! ME! FUCKER!!

Terra Skye: Oh no.. Come on Trent... Don't do this.

Steel pulls himself up by the ropes again and motions for JC. JC screams as he hits "The Big Boot of Death" again!

Ref Jeff: Dude! Give up! Come on!

Trent Steel: No...Come on big guy...You're sterner stuff...so am I...I can take it!

Trent reaches up and pulls himself up by the ropes. The crowd are on their feet as JC rushes to the ropes again going for "The Big Boot of Death" one more time and...He stops. He rares back like he's gonna just punch Trent, but he stops. He tells the referee to ask him again.

Johnny Vegas: What the fuck?!

Covert Jay: Yeah... What the fuck?!

Ref Jeff: Trent! Do you quit!

Trent Steel: I'm not quitting on my friend...

Ref Jeff: Damn it...

JC grabs the microphone.

JC: No. I’m done. Fuck Carnage. Fuck UGWC. Fuck this show. Fuck this match. I quit. Come on Trent, let’s go get you patched up.

Terra Skye: Wow...

Johnny Vegas: Well that was lack-luster. God damnit!

Covert Jay: Johnny made me really want to see more and now? Well.. I need some nachos to ease the pain.

Johnny Vegas: Now I want nachos. DAMNIT!

Terra Skye: Well... I don't know about the rest of you, but I wish these two the best because they need it. Whatever their issues are, I hope they figure them out.

Trent is barely able to move as JC grabs him and helps his friend to the back. The two “Rogues” make their way up the entrance way. Giving it their all and leaving all of it in the ring. Friends reunited, but at what cost in the ring.

[UGWC Staff]

Covert Jay: And now, the Morgan-Baal’s are going to put their money where their mouth is.

Terra Skye: This tag team match was supposed to be between your Cooperative Champs and our Tag Team Champs, but unfortunately Jonathan Willis was brutally attacked a few weeks prior, leaving it up to the number one contenders.

Johnny Vegas: BLEH

Nicholas Vinegar: Let me guess, you don’t like the number one contenders?

Johnny Vegas: I hate them more than I hate… Well, I hate those fuckers a lot.

Terra Skye: He’s pissy because Kyra broke off her engagement to Jack and Ken swooped in and became her white knight. But I think these two are kinda nice together.

Johnny Vegas: You would. Now shut up while I take a nap.

The intro to "Amen" by Halestorm fills the arena and the hype video for Ken Davison plays on the tron. Ken Davison steps out from the back as the first verse finishes. Instead of his robes, he now wears black tights with graphics that have an ombre effect that turn the graphics from Ken's signature yellow to Kyra's signature orange. He holds his arms out for a brief moment while the second verse plays. Ken lowers his arms and begins walking to the ring as the chorus kicks in, focused on the task at hand.

"My life, my love
My sex, my drug, my lust
My god it ain't no sin
Can I get an
Can I get an Amen?

My grace, my church
My pain, my tears, my hurt
My god, I'll say it again

Can I get an
Can I get an Amen?
Can I get an
Can I get an Amen?
Can I get an
Can I get an Amen?"

Kelly Carmichael: This next tag team match is scheduled for one fall! First to the ring, currently residing in Baltimore, Maryland... he weighs in tonight at 219 lbs... KEN DAVISON!!!!

Davison walks around the ringside area to a mixed reaction, the crowd having not fully accepting of his change of heart. He pauses at each corner, holding his arms out at each stop. After completing a full lap around the ring, Davison walks up the ring steps and wipes his feet on the ring apron before stepping into the ring.

Nicholas Vinegar: Ken Davison is one of your top wrestlers over there.

Johnny Vegas: Ew. YUCK.

Terra Skye: He’s a former world champion, and yes. He is. Regardless of what Johnny says.

Kelly Carmichael: And his partner….

"Mz Hyde" by Halestorm begins wailing over the PA system as Carnage's former owner steps out from behind the curtain, clad in her trademarked orange cropped tank top, baggy grey sweatpants and skater shoes. She's got a big smile on her face as she motions out to the cheering crowd and then to the ring where her opponent stands, waiting. Easily noticed is the full bottle of Jack Daniels she's holding in her right hand as she begins down the ramp, slapping the fans hands with her free hand along the way.

I can be the bitch,
I can play the whore,
Or your fairytale princess who could ask for more
A touch of wicked,
A pinch of risque,
Good girl gone bad, my poison is your remedy

Kelly Carmichael: ….From Baltimore, Maryland… She is KYRA JOHNSON!!!!!

Johnny Vegas: BOOOOO BITCH!!!! BOOOOOO!!!!

Covert Jay: Wow, this is as much passion as I’ve seen out of him all night.

Terra Skye: He’s very animated when these two do anything. Because getting over his perceived slights is overrated apparently.

As the lyrics continue, Johnson slides into the ring under the bottom rope and rises to her feet - making a beeline for her opponent; talking shit the entire time. Kyra laughs as the referee has to step in between her and her opponent, pushing her backwards as she raises her arms in the air and allows him to move her into the opposite corner. She turns around, drops the bottle of whiskey to the mat and jumps up to the second turnbuckle, raising her arms to the cheering crowd as her music begins to fade out.

Kelly Carmichael: And their opponents...

The lights in the arena flicker and pulse to the rhythm of the song, the video package announcing Gabriel Baal first, showing highlights of his career in the ring as well as clips from outside the ring.

Insane
Inside
The danger gets me high
Can't help myself
Got secrets I can't tell
I love the smell of gasoline
I light the match to taste the heat
I've always liked to play with fire

The arena drops to darkness as a match flicks to life on the GlobalTron before burning out and the full force of the song hits. The lights return with it to reveal Gabriel Baal stood on the stage, smirking out at the crowd while gripping his cane. He slowly makes his way down the ramp to the ring as a mixture of boos and cheers echo around him, swinging the cane idly as he goes.

I ride the edge
My speed goes in the red
Hot blood, these veins
My pleasure is their pain
I love to watch the castles burn
These golden ashes turn to dirt
I've always liked to play with fire

He enters the ring as the music continues, basking in the crowd's reaction before looking back up the ramp and holding a hand out, waiting for his partner to join him.

Watching as the flames get higher
I've always liked to play with--

The male voice in the song cuts out along with the lights, the red changing to an icy blue as Eden Morgan is revealed on the stage. The video package changes to one of her highlights in and out of the ring as she makes her way down the ramp.

Right of passage
Classic maverick
Match in the gas tank, oooh, that's wretched
Unstoppable legendary animals
Digital justice
Now you're gonna know us
Hail to the King and Queen of the Ruckus
Yacht money wired
No denying
I've always liked to play with fire

She ignores the crowd around her for the most part, their reaction to this duo electric whether it's in the positive or the negative, her attention on the man standing in the ring. Eden climbs the steps and takes Gabriel's hand, thanking him as he holds the ropes open for her before finally turning to the crowd as if to address them. Flames take over the GlobalTron screen a mixture of red and blue.

Dennis: ...They are the reigning UGWC Cooperative Champions, Eden Morgan, Gabriel Baal, INCENDIUM!!!!!

Johnny Vegas: What the fuck was that? That felt like a God damned hour worth of watching these two literally suck each other off over how ‘great’ they are.

Nicholas Vinegar: You’re not far off.

Covert Jay: They used to ninja it up with some owl masks back in the day but yeah… You’re not far off base.

Terra Skye: They have every right to feel like they’re great because their track record speaks for itself.

The match begins with Kyra and Eden starting off. The two circle the ring and lock up with Eden getting the upper hand. Johnson has to fight her way out of a hammerlock and tries to lock on a side headlock when she is shoved off into the ropes. Morgan is unsuccessful with a body trip as Johnson easily jumps over but as she comes off of the far ropes Eden is already there with a running knee lift to the midsection. Morgan follows up with a hip toss that sends Johnson over and an elbow drop connects to the sternum of Kyra. Quick cover gets no count from the referee as Kyra pushes out. Eden has Kyra now with a side headlock as they work their way back to their feet. Kyra pulls Morgan up into the air looking for a back suplex but Eden backflips over and lands on her feet. Kyra turns and unloads with a clothesline that takes Morgan-Baal down. Gabriel is on the ring apron not enjoying the sight as he watches Kyra follow up with an elbow drop of her own, which misses. Eden slides over into her corner where she takes a moment to consult with her partner.

Johnny Vegas: Oh come on dickheads… Beat their asses!

Nicholas Vinegar: I do believe that’s what they’re trying to do.

Terra Skye: Kyra’s doing a good job here hanging with Eden Morgan-Baal.

Johnny Vegas: Oh shut up about the match, no one cares.

After a few moments of deliberation, Eden decides not to tag out, instead calls Kyra back to the center of the ring for another lockup. Kyra obliges, but she's caught off-guard by a drop toe hold that Eden uses to quickly float over into a front facelock. She's looking for a guillotine style choke but Kyra impressively traps the wrist and sits out, countering the hold with an armbar. The two women work their way back up where Eden tries to find a way out of the submission, which she does, when Eden pulls off an impressive single-handed cartwheel to loosen the torque and where she uses Kyra's own grip to pull her into a single arm lariat. Kyra ducks the lariat and spins Eden around. She pulls Eden up once more for the back suplex but this time spins her around and drops her in the center of the ring with a blue thunder bomb. Kyra holds onto the legs for the cover-

ON- No, quick kick out.

Terra Skye: That was a beautiful sequence by these ladies.

Johnny Vegas: It sucked.

Covert Jay: Whoa man, you need to relax.

Nicholas Vinegar: Somehow I think that he’s unable to do that. But you’re right Terra, We already know that Eden is one of the best to ever lace up her boots, but I am impressed with Kyra here tonight as well.

Kyra pulls Eden back to her feet but Eden surprises her with an elbow to the midsection. Kyra follows up with an elbow to the back of Morgan's head. Morgan stumbles to a neutral corner and Kyra charges. Eden moves out of the way. Kyra takes a chest-full of turnbuckle padding and Eden drills her with a gamengiri style kick to the back of the head. Stunned, this allows Eden to irish whip Kyra into the far corner and follow up with a running high knee. She hooks Kyra's head and drills her with a bulldog. Eden shoots the half nelson on Kyra and goes for the cover-

ONE

Kickout by Kyra Johnson at one and a half.

Nicholas Vinegar: Neither woman is allowing there to be too much counting so far.

Johnny Vegas: OH COME ON!

Eden grabs Kyra by the hair and drags her over to her corner where she tags in Gabriel Baal. The referee acknowledges the tag as Gabriel steps through the ropes and drills Kyra in the forehead with a closed fist shot. Kyra stumbles back toward the center of the ring as Gabriel sweeps out her legs while Eden Morgan follows that up with a somersault leg drop. Gabriel then follows that up with a huge leaping leg drop of his own as he comes down across Kyra's throat. Gabriel goes for a cover as the referee is busy trying to get Eden to exit the ring. In the meantime, Ken Davison steps through the ropes and goes to stomp Gabriel on the back of the head. Gabriel sees him and pulls away from the cover, and the two exchange words as the referee now has to run across the ring to get Davison back on the outside.

Johnny Vegas: OH FUCK YOU KEN… LET YOUR WOMAN GET HER ASS KICKED ON HER OWN!

Covert Jay: He’s protective of his lady, I can dig that. Even though from what I’ve seen his lady is a blood thirsty bitch.

Terra Skye: I can say the same thing about the team of Eden and Gabriel, can’t I?

With order restored, Baal pulls Johnson back to her feet and starts slamming her down with a succession of three straight vertical suplexes. Johnson for a brief moment clutches her back in pain, but she's showing her toughness and her refusal to stay down. It ends up working against her, though, as when she pushes herself back up, Gabriel Baal springboards off of the ropes and catches her with the Freudian Slip! Baal goes for a cover, pushing his forearm into the face of his opponent.


ONE


TWO


Kyra Johnson kicks out at the count of two.

Johnny Vegas: GOD DAMNIT!!! Just KEEP HER DOWN!

Terra Skye: You of all people should know that that’s not the easiest thing to do, Johnny. But I’ve gotta say, Gabriel and Eden are working flawlessly as a team out there.

Nicholas Vinegar: That’s to be expected. Kyra desperately needs to get Ken into this match though.

Terra Skye: Absolutely right.

Baal gets back to his feet, grabbing Kyra by the back of her head and pulling her upright as well. He smirks at her before hitting her with another closed fist, sending her back down to a knee. He moves towards the ropes, looking for the Freudian Slip but just as The Chimera springboards off of the ropes, Kyra catches him flush with a boot to the throat!! Baal lands on the mat, clutching his throat as Kyra uses the opportunity and heads towards her corner, tagging her partner into the match!

Terra Skye: Oh shit, here comes Ken.

Ken wastes little time as he gets into the ring, giving Eden a look before he grabs Gabriel, hitting him with a picture perfect ‘face turn’ (spinning impaler)!! Gabriel’s head is spiked into the mat and he tries to roll away, but with a much fresher Ken Davison already back to his feet and stalking over the fallen Chimera, Gabriel’s not got much of a chance. Gabriel begins crawling towards his corner, and the outstretched hand of Eden Morgan-Baal, but Ken grabs his leg just before their hands can touch. Ken drags Gabriel back into the center of the ring and while holding his leg he lands a few well placed kicks to the middle of Baal’s back. Finally letting go of his leg, Ken grabs Baal by the back of the head and guides the UGWC Cooperative and Conquest champion to his feet where Gabriel surprises Davison with a boot to the knee. Relatively unphased, Ken gets back up and the two men begin trading lefts and rights, the slightly bigger Gabriel Baal slowly backing Ken up into a neutral corner.

Nicholas Vinegar: This is a one on one match I’d sure like to see some time in the future. These two are really going at it.

Terra Skye: You’re not wrong, Nicholas. All of these superstars are putting on one hell of a match so far.

Covert Jay: Yeah, but look out…

As Jay said it, Eden can be seen in their corner looking a little antsy as she watches Ken begin to fight back out of the corner, trading closed fists for knife edged chops. Kyra having recovered enough in her corner, decides to drop down and sneak around the ring, pulling Edens legs out from under her. Eden drops down on her feet on the ringside floor and Kyra hits her with a swinging uppercut that sends her staggering back into the barricade. Johnson tries to follow up with a running double ax handle but Eden goes down low with a dropkick to the knee that sends Kyra bouncing forehead first off of the steel. On the inside of the ring, Davison notices Kyra in trouble and turns to exit when Gabriel Baal grabs him from behind and drops him with a reverse ddt across the knee followed by a neckbreaker. Vicious combination by one half of the UGWC champions as he goes for a cover-

One


Two


No! Ken Davison kicks out at two and three quarters!

Johnny Vegas: Son of a BITCH! Just stay down you bald, ignorant piece of donkey--

Nicholas Vinegar: That was a close one! Gabriel almost had Davison there but Davison had enough wherewithal to kick out, keeping their team alive in this one!

Terra Skye: There’s a reason Ken is a former world champ. But as I’m seeing, there’s also a reason why Gabriel Baal is one of the most revered wrestlers in these parts.

Gabriel pulls Ken back to his feet and takes him over to the corner where he waits for Eden to get back up to make a tag. Eden tags in and takes Ken Davison by the arm and sets him up for the Fall of Eden and signals to her partner for the Deadly Strike! Gabriel nods back and bounds towards the ropes, looking to springboard off of the middle rope for another Catatonia, but Kyra reaches up from the ringside floor and pulls the middle rope down, causing Gabriel to spill through the ropes and to the outside with her! The interference throws off Eden just enough that Ken Davison is able to block the Fall of Eden, and he drills her with an exploder suplex back into her own turnbuckles! With both competitors down, Davison crawls the long way towards his corner where Kyra Johnson has finally gotten herself back up on the ring apron. Ken lunges out and makes the tag.

Covert Jay: I gotta say, Kyra is my kind of ninja. That was ingenious, stopping the Deadly Strike the way she did.

Terra Skye: Our former Ultraviolent Champion has a lot of tricks up her sleeves, that’s for damn sure.

Eden is back to her feet, but she is the immediate recipient of a running forearm shot in the corner. Kyra is fired up, and she takes Eden by the head and calls for a Tornado DDT. Kyra turns and bounds off of the champions turnbuckles and slams Morgan's head down into the mat, but before the maneuver was complete Gabriel Baal reaches in and makes a blind tag. Kyra pulls Eden back to the center of the ring and pulls her back up to her feet where she kicks Morgan in the gut and sets her up for the Jawdropper, a widows peak. Kyra gets Eden up on her shoulders when suddenly Gabriel Baal comes flying in smacking her right in the face with a Catatonia! Eden lands on her feet and spins Kyra around, drilling her with a Fall of Eden right in the center of the ring, finishing the Deadly Strike! Gabriel Baal drops down on top of Kyra for the cover.

One

Two

Ken Davison comes into the ring, but Eden throws herself at him, just enough to keep him from breaking up the pin!

Three!!!

Terra Skye: Holy shit!

Johnny Vegas: Thank fucking GOD!

Nicholas Vinegar: What a match! Admittedly Gabriel and Eden almost lucked into that Deadly Strike, but that doesn’t take anything away from Kyra Johnson and Ken Davison’s performance out here tonight! In my opinion, they’re more than worthy competitors for any Cooperative championships they would pursue!

Terra Skye: Absolutely! Well, that was a fun match! Let’s head into the next!

[UGWC Staff]

Vinegar: It’s time for our Co-Main Event!

Skye: Our Ultraviolent Champion, Kane King and your Chaos Champion, Tempest are about to go to war!

Vegas: You mean King is going to prove while we’re the superior company with the Superior talent!

Vinegar: That remains to be seen. I take nothing away from Kane King, but you shouldn’t underestimate Tempest.

Vegas: What’s there to underestimate? He’s a midget compared to King. This match will be over before it has a chance to go anywhere!

Covert Jay: You haven’t seen Tempest. The boy ain’t right.

Skye: I’ve watched some of his handiwork while prepping for this show. King has the size and power advantage, but Tempest is just as tough and just as dangerous.

Vegas: Bullshit. The bigger and more powerful always win over twirps like Tempest. Just because he’s a freak with a high pain tolerance doesn’t mean he’s good enough to beat our monster. You’ve never seen anyone like Lab Rat before. He’s an entirely different degree of monster.

Skye: King is a threat to anyone, but you shouldn’t discount Tempest because he’s smaller. I think his record speaks for itself.

Vinegar: Thank you, Terra. I take nothing away from King. He could go toe to toe with our most dangerous talents and stand a very good chance of winning. He’s legitimately terrifying.

Vegas: More than your freaky little child champion is.

Covert Jay: I dunno man. Tempest is one psychotic little ninja.

Vinegar: He’s a two-time Chaos Champion and his last reign lasted for one-hundred and twenty-three days and his current one is at nearly sixty days. It puts him at the eighth longest combined reign in the history of UGWC.

Vegas: I’m not impressed.

Skye: You don’t have to be.

Vinegar: You might be as this match goes on.

Vegas: No fucking way. King is going to beat his ass in record time and then we’ll get to see our World Champion embarrass yours.

Skye: Stop being an ass.

Vegas: I’m telling the truth.

Vinegar: Sloane may be a brand new World Champion, but she’s accomplished a lot in UGWC in a short amount of time.

Vegas: Inferior talent.

Vinegar: I’m not going to sit here and fight with you about how qualified our World Champions are and have been. I’m also not going to sit here and argue with me over Tempest and King. They’re both exceptional athletes and extremely dangerous men and I respect them both professionally, even if both personally disturb me.

Vegas: You mean they “terrify” you.

Vinegar: Yes. Any rational person would feel that way.

Skye: They’re both great athletes who are incredibly vicious men.

Covert Jay: We’re about to see how vicious they can be!

Vinegar: Yes we are. This is going to be a bloodbath.

Vegas: I’m going to get a drink.

Skye: You don’t have to come back. Nicholas and I can call this just fine without you.

Vinegar: Let’s go to Mitchell!

Dennis: Ladies and gentlemen, it’s time for the CO- MAIN EVENT!!! Introducing FIRST, from CARNAGE WRESTLING…

The screens display a flickering, static-struck screen with the crowned rat logo, bone-white over a black and red spattered background as the first riffs of "Hail to the King" begin playing; when the first heavy thrums of rhythm guitar in the music strike, the logo shudders and glitches, electricity running through it from left to right like a broken heartbeat. Below the screens the entrance is flooded with rolling fog cast in blood-red light and white strobe lights that match the beat of the song and of the electric shock waves on the screen.

Where once the Lab Rat King would enter in chains, he now walks freely, his slow and deliberate steps taking him down toward the ring. There's something bestial about the way he moves, like an animated gargoyle; he carries the Ultraviolent Championship belt on his shoulder, which bears a visible bite-mark indent in the leather strap. He's accompanied by his wife and valet, Grace King, who seems to keep him from lunging at the jeering crowd with nothing but a hand on his arm and a smirk of her own.

Once he reaches the ropes, Grace cranes up to give him a kiss on the muzzle as she takes the belt from him, and he moves almost animalistic onto the mat, standing up slowly. If his opponent is already there, he stares them down, still except for the swell of his breath; if not, he stalks the perimeter of the ropes, like a predator waiting to hunt.

Dennis: Standing in today at six feet, eight-inches and weighing in at two-hundred and eighty-five pounds, from parts unknown, he is the CARNAGE WRESTLING ULTRAVIOLENT CHAMPION!!! Ladies and gentlemen, he is “LAAAAAAAAAAAAB RAAAAAAAAAAT” KIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGGGGGGG!!!

Covert Jay: He’s like “Silence of the Lambs” guy, but huge!!

Vegas: “Silence of the Lambs guy”? It’s suddenly clear to me why Dr. Lieberjosch hates you so much.

Vinegar: Hans hates nearly everyone.

Vegas: Including you.

Vinegar: Weirdly, no. Hans doesn’t hate me.

Vegas: We’ll have to talk about that.

Skye: See what I have to deal with, Nick?

Vinegar: Yes.

Vegas: I’m charming.

Vinegar: You’re as obnoxious as Hans without the burden of intelligence.

Skye: Perfect.

Vegas: Did you just call me stupid?

Skye: Point to Nick.

Covert Jay: Even I tend to pick those insults up more quicker.

Vegas: “More quicker”?

Covert Jay: That’s what I said.

Vinegar: Jay’s terrible grammar aside, Lab Rat King is enormous. He might be bigger than anyone currently on our active roster. He’s going to be a challenge for Tempest.

Vegas: Rat King would run through your roster like the enhancement talents they are.

Skye: I apologize for my broadcast colleague, Nick. He’s an asshole.

Vinegar: It’s nothing I’m not used to, but thank you. Johnny is doing what a lot of people have done towards Tempest, he’s underestimating him based purely on his size. A lot of opponents have made that mistake with Tempest and they’ve lost because of it.

Vegas: That won’t happen. King will squash this weird twerp.

Vinegar: Your guy calls himself “Rat King”, wears a mask and growls and talks to himself during matches. Would you care to try that “weird” accusation again?

Skye: He’s got you there.

Vegas: You’re not helping.

Covert Jay: Nicky has a point.

Vegas: Speaking of “weirdos”.

Covert Jay: I’m not a “weirdo”, I’m a ninja.

Vegas: You need to be medicated.

Skye: Ignore him.

Vinegar: I’m going to. Mitchell is ready to introduce Tempest. Let’s go to the ring.

Dennis: Introducing his OPPONENT…



Tempest enters unorthodoxly.

Dennis: Standing in at six feet and two- hundred and five pounds, he hails from Gnaw Bone, Indiane, he’s the reigning UGWC Chaos Champion and a member of “The Astro Creeps”... TEEEEEEMMMMMMPEEEESSSSTTTT!!!

Skye: Wow.

Vegas: You can’t be impressed by him.

Skye: Tempest is creepy. It’s that mountain who’s walking to the ring with him…

Vegas: He is big.

Vinegar: Kosnar is extremely dangerous, and perfectly happy to get involved in Tempest’s matches.

Vegas: That won’t bother Rat King. He can handle whatever Tempest throws at him.

Vinegar: Kosnar isn’t just some random object. He’s a walking weapon.

Skye: It’s hard to read how Rat King feels about his being here.

Vinegar: I don’t know him well enough to read his expression, but he’s clearly somewhat leery of him.

Vegas: You’re seeing things.

Skye: No, I think he’s right. He’s definitely not scared. I doubt Rat King is scared of anything, but he’s smart enough to know that he can’t casually dismiss the threat that Kosnar posts to him.

Vegas: So this isn’t a fair fight. UGWC is trying to cheat us out of a guaranteed victory.

Vinegar: “Cheat” doesn’t apply to Chaos matches any more than it applies to Ultraviolent matches. If the situation was reversed, you wouldn’t care.

Vegas: Nope.

Vinegar: At least you’re being honest about that.

Skye: That’s the most you’re going to get out of him.

Vinegar: He’s like working with Hans, just… crass.

Vegas: I resent that.

Vinegar: There’s the bell!

Vegas: Well, that was stupid.

Skye: Or crazy. Even Referee White Rey looks a little surprised by it!

Covert Jay: I think they heard that in the back of the arena.

Vinegar: That was one hell of a backhand across the mouth.

Vegas: King’s going to kill him. What an idiot!

Vinegar: Is he?

Vegas: He’s pissing off a monster. It can’t be anything but stupid!

Vinegar: No. He’s trying to piss your monster off. It’s not stupidity, it’s strategy.

Skye: It might be, but it could still be suicidal.

Vinegar: I’m not arguing that, but I’ve seen Tempest do this enough to know that he’s not as mindless and irrational as he likes to make everyone think he is.

Skye: I believe you.

Vegas: I don’t.

Covert Jay: Listen, Tempest is legit nuts, but he’s not stupid.

Vegas: You’re full of shit.

Covert Jay: I’ve been told that. I’m not right now.

Vinegar: I’ve seen Tempest act… weird before, but not quite like this.

Skye: He keeps bouncing around King…

Vegas: That’s probably annoying King enough, but the other part...that’s going to get him killed.

Vinegar: Yes, popping up and slapping him on top of the head might not be a great idea. At the moment it appears to be confusing King more than it’s annoying him.

Skye: That’s going to change soon.

Covert Jay: Is it just me, or is he reaching for the big man’s mask?

Vinegar: It’s hard to tell.

Skye: If he does, King is going to go ballistic.

Vinegar: I wouldn’t be surprised if Tempest goes for it, but it seems a bit premature to do that now.

Skye: Not necessarily. Like I said, if Tempest pulls it off, King will go off like a nuke and whatever game plan he has will go right out the window.

Vegas: At that point he’ll mercilessly pound your joke of a Chaos Champion into the mat.

Vinegar: King takes a wild and loping swing at Tempest, who dodges under it and drives his shoulder into the back of the larger man’s knee. King wheels and reaches for him, but Tempest once again nimbly leaps out of the way.

Vegas: He should stand and fight like a man and stop being such a bitch.

Skye: He’s not being a bitch. He’s being smart and using one of his only advantages.

Vegas: He’s a bitch. If he wanted to be a spider monkey, he should have joined a different division.

Skye: You wouldn’t stand there and let King hit you.

Vegas: Of course not, I’m not stupid enough to step into a ring with him.

Vinegar: He’s not stupid. He’s a competitor. He’s not going to let a far larger opponent beat on him, not before he’s ready to anyway.

Skye: King takes another swipe at him, but Tempest dodges under it and hits him with another chop block.

Vinegar: King seems a bit confused about how to handle Tempest right now.

Vegas: If he’d hold still…

Vinegar: We both know he’s not going to hold still.

Vegas: Then this could take all night.

Vinegar: It’ll end eventually. Someone will make a mistake eventually.

Skye: King reaches for Tempest as he tries to scoot between the large man’s legs.

Vegas: King caught him!

Vinegar: Tempest rolls over onto his back and drives a boot into King’s chin!

Skye: King staggers back and glares down at Tempest as he makes a slight adjustment to his mask.

Covert Jay: Thankfully it stayed on.

Vinegar: King goes to stomp on Tempest, but he rolls out of the way and out to the floor. King follows him out and is immediately cut off by Kosnar, who might be the only man in the building who can look Rat King right in the face.

Covert Jay: He’s a scary bastard.

Vegas: Tempest’s pet doesn’t stand a chance.

Skye: Kosnar isn’t budging. Or… reacting.

Covert Jay: The big homie is stone cold!

Vegas: “The big homie”? Can you ever say anything that’s not stupid?

Covert Jay: Sure. I love nachos.

Vegas: That’s not what I meant.

Covert Jay: What’s wrong with loving nachos?

Vegas: Nothing, you fucking idiot. I can’t believe we're having this conversation.

Skye: King scowls at Kosnar, who almost looks bored.

Vinegar: Cane shot to the back of the knees from Tempest!

Vegas: King didn’t even flinch!

Vinegar: King wheels around and glares angrily at Tempest, who winds up for another cane shot!

Skye: King bends over to grab him, but Tempest drives the cane up into the point of his chin.

Vinegar: His head snaps back!

Covert Jay: Oh my!

Vegas: What a cheap shot!

Vinegar: Kosnar drives his foot into the back of King’s head!

Covert Jay: How the hell is he still on his feet?

Vegas: He’s tougher than either of those pussies you’ve put him up against.

Vinegar: Kosnar grabs King from behind!

Skye: T-Bone suplex onto the floor!

Vinegar: The big man is down!

Vegas: This is bullshit. Tempest only has an advantage because he keeps cheating.

Covert Jay: “Cheating”. You keep using that word. I don’t think it means what you think it means.

Vegas: Do you ever shut up?

Vinegar: Rarely.

Covert Jay: Are you picking on me, Nick?

Vinegar: No. I’m only pointing out to our guest that you like to talk.

Covert Jay: Oh. Well that’s OK. I thought you were trying to replace the Doc for a minute.

Vinegar: I don’t have to. Mr. Vegas is here.

Skye: King tries to push himself to his feet, only for Kosnar to drive a forearm into his back and drive him to his hands and knees!

Covert Jay: Whoa!!!

Vinegar: Tempest leaps off of the turnbuckle and crashes down into King’s back with a chair!

Covert Jay: Down goes Frazier! Down goes Frazier!

Vegas: Do you have any jokes that aren’t obnoxiously dated?

Covert Jay: Do people ask your dates the same thing about you?

Vegas: What?

Covert Jay: What?

Vegas: Fuck you.

Skye: Tempest pops up and begins pummeling King across the back with the chair as Kosnar stomps on his right foot.

Vinegar: That yell was terrifying!

Vegas: He’s getting angry.

Vinegar: It’s almost like the pain is firing him up!

Skye: Kosnar grabs him by the arms as Tempest rears back with the chair!

Vinegar: Tempest swings!

Covet Jay: That’s going to leave a mark!

Vinegar: Rat King headbutts Kosnar and drops to the floor! Tempest swings over him and smashes Kosnar in the face with the chair!

Skye: King grabs Tempest and heaves him overhead into Kosnar, knocking him backwards into the ringpost!

Vinegar: Kosnar’s head bounces off of the ringpost! He’s dazed!

Covert Jay: Ninja’s have to be more coordinated than that, Tempest!

Vinegar: Rat King grabs Tempest and once again throws him overhead with a throw that sends him right into Kosnar!

Skye: Kosnar’s head bounces off of the ring post again as Tempest slides to the floor!

Vegas: He looks like a bug splattering on a windshield! Perfect!

Skye: Rat King pulls Tempest up by his head!

Cover Jay: Holy crap!

Vinegar: My god! Rat King just heaved Tempest into the ring barrier by his head!

Skye: That was an uncomfortable thud.

Vegas: Ya think?

Vinegar: Tempest crashes into the barrier and comes up in a sitting position.

Covert Jay: Jesus!

Skye: What a running knee from King!

Covert Jay: Tempest has to be dead!

Vegas: I told you that your worthless knock off champion would get destroyed.

Skye: Tempest isn’t a “knock off”. Stop being such an asshole.

Vinegar: Don’t worry about it. He’s just a blowhard.

Vegas: Screw you.

Vinegar: No thanks. My standards are higher.

Covert Jay: Nicky!

Skye: Rat King turns on Kosnar, who’s trying to clear his head after bouncing off of the ring post twice. King grabs Kosnar by his head and begins to repeatedly slam it into the ring post.

Covert Jay: He might kill him!

Vegas: He deserves this for interfering. Cheaters never prosper.

Vinegar: Stop being an idiot.

Skye: That’s never going to happen.

Vegas: You’re supposed to be on my side!

Skye: I don’t like you any more than he does.

Vegas: Well this is bullshit.

Vinegar: King finally stops banging Kosnar’s head against the ringpost and the massive man slumps to the floor. King turns on Tempest.

Skye: Chair shot to the stomach!

Vinegar: Then over the back!

Skye: Tempest goes low and hits him in the knee!

Covert Jay: Hello!

Vegas: Come on, White! Do your job!

Skye: He is doing his job, it’s completely legal!

Vinegar: Tempest takes the big man to his knees by turning the chair sideways and driving it up into Rat King’s groin!

Skye: Did you hear the impact from that?

Covert Jay: I think the twentieth row heard it!

Vinegar: Tempest destroys a chair over the top of the head of Lab Rat King!

Skye: He hit him so hard that the headrest of the chair broke off!

Covert Jay: Someone’s getting a unique souvenir!

Vegas: As long as it doesn’t kill them. This company does such a shitty job of crowd safety.

Vinegar: I suppose that you have protective netting up in front of your audience?

Vegas: No. That would mess with the camera shots.

Vinegar: Then shut up.

Skye: Tempest puts the chair on the floor and pulls King’s ankle through it!

Vegas: Of course the little pussy is trying to cripple King, he knows he can’t beat him!

Vinegar: Tempest runs across the floor to the railing, turns and springs back at King!

Covert Jay: Ninjaaaaaaa!!!

Vegas: God damn it you’re annoying!

Skye: Tempest comes down with both feet onto the chair!

Vinegar: My god that sounded horrible!

Skye: The sound of his feet slamming into the chair, or the sound that King’s ankle made?

Vinegar: Both!

Skye: Lab Rat King bellows in agony and flips over onto his back!

Vinegar: What the hell is he saying?

Covet Jay: Either “ow”, or a torrent of curses would be appropriate right now.

Skye: Tempest pulls Rat King up and rolls him into the ring with the chair around his foot.

Vinegar: He’s dragging him into the corner.

Covert Jay: This isn’t going to be good!

Vegas: Ya think?!

Skye: Daedalus is helping! He has King by the foot and is holding it in place with the chair wrapped around it while Tempest goes up on the apron!

Covert Jay: That’s one sadistic smile!

Vinegar: Tempest takes off across the apron!

Covert Jay: Air lunatic!

Skye: Rolling senton onto the chair!

Vinegar: King’s ankle might be snapped!

Skye: Tempest pulls him back into the ring and drops for the pin!

Vinegar: King kicks out before White Rey can even get “one” counted!

Covert Jay: Unreal!

Vegas: I told you. Tempest is committing suicide with this match! Normally, I’d like a guy like him who terrifies and mauls others, but I’d never root against Lab Rat King, I don’t care who your sad excuse for a roster is throwing at him!

Vinegar: Our “sad excuse for a roster” has your ultraviolet monster down to one good foot.

Vegas: Coincidence.

Vinegar: Keep calling it that. Tempest is very much in control right now.

Skye: Tempest throws the chair down in the corner and pulls King up.

Vegas: King is fighting him! Even on one bad foot, our Ultraviolent monster can crush your fraud champion like a bug!

Vinegar: Boomstick!

Skye: Right into the second turnbuckle!

Vinegar: He pulls King back up!

Skye: Tempest connects with a second “Boomstick” into the chair!

Vinegar: He pulls King up and drags him away from the ropes!

Skye: He drops into the pin!

Vinegar: Here’s White for the count!

Covert Jay: How the hell??

Vinegar: King kicked out before “one”...again!!

Skye: Tempest looks dumbfounded.

Covert Jay: He looks happy to me.

Vegas: He looks deranged.

Covert Jay: That’s normal for him.

Skye: Tempest kicks the chair from the ring like he’s angry at it.

Vinegar: He’s not angry, he’s planning.

Vegas: He’d better plan quickly. The real ultraviolet wrestler is moving.

Skye: Tempest leaps up onto the top rope.

Covert Jay: Fly!

Vinegar: He’s airborne!

Vegas: Ha! It serves the little prick right!

Skye: Lab Rat King caught him!

Vinegar: He turns towards the ropes!

Covert Jay: Oh no!!

Skye: Everyone move!!

Vegas: What fo..shit!!

Covert Jay: Holy shit!

Vinegar: Our table has been obliterated!

Covert Jay: So has Vegas…

Skye: That’s no big loss.

Covert Jay: That was one hell of a throw!

Skye: “Empty, Hollow, Thud” through our announcers table from the ring!!

Covert Jay: Alas, poor Johnny, I knew him, Skye.

Vinegar: That’s a bit of a high brow reference, don’t you think?

Covert Jay: It seemed appropriate.

Skye: The bright side is that the broadcast will be better until he recovers.

Vinegar: Yes it will.

Covert Jay: Johnny...you ok, hon?

Vinegar: “Hon”?

Covert Jay: Sorry, it’s a gaming channel reference.

Vinegar: Well, at least you’re not quoting Shakespeare now.

Skye: Am I the only one who’s feeling really...creeped out by the look that King has on his face right now?

Vinegar: No, it’s definitely a scary look

Cover Jay: He’s looking at Tempest like I look at a taco.

Vinegar: That’s a frighteningly accurate description.

Skye: King reaches down and pulls Tempest up by his neck.

Covert Jay: Christ his hands are huge!

Vinegar: He throws Tempest up overhead so that he’s holding him up with both hands.

Covert Jay: Here comes Kosnar!

Skye: It’s incredible that he’s back on his feet!

Covert Jay: There GOES Kosnar!

Vinegar: King just threw Tempest into Kosnar and sent them both to the floor!

Skye: King pulls Tempest back up!

Vinegar: Powerslam onto the floor! He pulls a table from under the ring and sets it up at ringside.

Covert Jay: He just pulled Kosnar up like he's a piece of paper!

Vinegar: He drops Kosnar onto the table and moves to Tempest, throwing him back into the ring over the top rope.

Covert Jay: That landing caused an uncomfortable thud.

Vinegar: It certainly did.

Skye: King steps into the ring and drags him across it by his hair to the side where Kosnar lays on the table.

Vinegar: He’s stepping out onto the apron and yanks Tempest over the top rope.

Covert Jay: He’s pulling him around like he’s a child’s toy!

Vinegar: He throws Tempest over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

Covert Jay: How can he move that fast, especially on that injured ankle?!

Vinegar: Adrenaline can do incredible things, Jay!

Covert Jay: Holy crap!

Skye: King leaps off of the apron and drives Tempest through the table and Kosnar with a vicious looking spinebuster!

Vinegar: The table disintegrated!

Skye: King pops up with a roar and reaches for Tempest!

Covert Jay: Goozle!

Vinegar: He’s holding Tempest up by one hand and appears to be thinking about what to do next.

Skye: I’ve seen that look on his face before and it never ends well.

Covert Jay: Look how slowly he’s raising his hand.

Vinegar: It’s not going to go well now.

Skye: Did you hear the crack of that punch?

Vinegar: It sounded like a gunshot!

Covert Jay: I suddenly don’t want tacos anymore. I feel queasy.

Skye: Tempest’s head snapped back so violently!

Vinegar: King lands another punch!

Skye: And a third!

Vinegar: And a fourth!

Covert Jay: He’s using Tempest’s head for a speed bag!

Skye: This is exactly what Tempest needed to avoid! Once King gets rolling like this, he’s nearly unstoppable.

Vinegar: He’s just standing there pummeling him and with every hit, Tempest spasms and goes a little more limp.

Covert Jay: He’s going to obliterate Tempest’s face.

Skye: Going to?

Vinegar: If Tempest doesn’t figure this out, he’s not going to have a face!

Skye: It’s already a bloody mess.

Covert Jay: Woah!

Skye: That wasn’t smart.

Vinegar: I think Daedalus realizes that now.

Skye: King didn’t even twitch when Daedalus hit him with the chair!

Covert Jay: It’s like he’s attacking Frankenstein’s monster!

Vinegar: King slowly turns on Daedalus as Tempest dangles from his right hand like a rag doll.

Skye: Daedalus is...taunting...him. Does he have a death wish? I know he’s trying to distract King, but he’s just pissing him off.

Vinegar: Daedalus throws the chair at Rat King, who uses Tempest’s body to swat it out of the way.

Skye: That backfired.

Vinegar: A bit.

Cover Jay: Normally I’d say something funny here, but there’s nothing funny about this.

Vinegar: He’s literally swinging Tempest at Daedalus like a bloody club.

Covert Jay: Nick, you’re so scared you went British!

Vinegar: What? British?

Covert Jay: “Bloody” club.

Vinegar: No, Jay. King is literally swinging the bloody Tempest around like a club.

Covert Jay: Oh, right.

Skye: Daedalus is trying to keep away from King’s swinging, but he’s almost been caught a couple of times.

Vinegar: He’s slowly walking Daedalus around the ring.

Skye: “Stalking” is more fitting.

Vinegar: It certainly is.

Covert Jay: They just passed the ramp.

Skye: Daedalus had better watch where he’s going, he’s running out of ground.

Vinegar: Good observation, Terra. They’re slowly closing on the prone body of Kosnar, who hasn’t moved since being put through the table.

Skye: Have you noticed that every few swings, that King slams Tempest into the apron?

Covert Jay: It’s the hardest part of the ring!

Vinegar: Thanks for that, Jay. We had no idea.

Covert Jay: No problem, Nick!



Vinegar: To answer your question, Terra, yes. I have noticed that. Every few swings, he slams Tempest side first into the ring apron. It’s a very subtle act, but he’s slowly softening up Tempest’s sides, which are going to make it hard for him to twist, and even worse, harder to breathe.

Skye: Daedalus just found Kosnar!

Covert Jay: Someone’s out of highway!

Vinegar: Daedalus trips over Kosnar and falls to the floor! King lashes out and grabs him by the throat!

Covert Jay: He’s banging them off of each other!

Skye: He finally throws Tempest back into the ring and he crashes to the mat in a bloody heap.

Covert Jay: Poor Daedalus! This isn’t going to go well!

Vinegar: He pulled King’s mask off!!

Skye: It was pure coincidence, but his flailing foot caught it and ripped it from King’s face!

Covert Jay: The big man is frozen!

Skye: Not for long! Whenever this happens, King becomes a whirlwind of violence!

Vinegar: That doesn’t bode at all well for Tempest, although from what my research has told me, that’s a double-edged sword for King!

Skye: Yup! He gets completely out of control when this happens and opponents have taken advantage of it before.

Covert Jay: No disrespect to Tempest, but I’m not sure there’s enough of him left to take advantage of anything!

Vinegar: To your point, Jay, he still hasn’t moved.

Skye: For now the one who should be terrified is Daedalus!

Vinegar: King finally snaps out of his momentary reverie and his expression has completely changed! The cold, methodical stare has been replaced by a look of rabid fury!

Skye: He’s lifting Daedalus up overhead!

Covert Jay: Rat King Flight One, departing now for the twentieth row!!

Vinegar: If not for the fans, that would have been a very painful landing!

Covert Jay: They’re surfing him around that section!

Skye: They’d better put him down! Rat King doesn’t care who he hurts once his mask is gone, everyone around him is a target!

Vinegar: He just stepped over the barrier and waded into the crowd, which is parting for him with great haste!

Skye: Good!

Vinegar: The people who were crowd surfing Daedalus around just dumped him onto the floor!

Covert Jay: King has already covered the distance and grabs a limp Daedalus with another goozle!

Vinegar: He rears back and

Covert Jay: Holy shit!

Vinegar: He just threw Daedalus like a bowling ball!

Skye: He must have taken out fifteen rows of chairs in that section!

Vinegar: Daedalus is lucky that he wasn’t thrown in one of the sections with anchored seating!

Covert Jay: I bet he doesn’t feel too lucky right now!

Skye: Rat King wades through the chairs and grabs Daedalus by his shirt!

Vinegar: Good god! He just winged him into the wall between levels one and two, barely missing the equipment table!

Covert Jay: I have a feeling that King is going to do something about that!

Vinegar: The sound Daedalus made when his body, and then his head hit that wall was sickening!

Skye: King drags Daedalus up the stairs behind him with Daedalus’ head barely missing bouncing off of the concrete steps!

Covert Jay: What the hell is he doing?

Skye: He just dropped Daedalus by the railing and walked back down the stairs again.

Vinegar: He’s pulled up loose cables from the equipment table and is taking them back up to where he left Daedalus.

Covert Jay: This is bad. This is really bad.

Vinegar: King’s tying up Daedalus with the cables. White Ray is telling him to stop, but there’s literally nothing he can do!

Skye: He’s finished wrapping Daedalus in them!

Vinegar: The two are face to face now, not that Daedalus has a clue what’s going on!

Covert Jay: Alley up!

Vegas: That’s “Alley oop”, you fucking moron!

Skye: You’re back. Great...

Covert Jay: Jesus Harold Christ!!!

Vegas: “Harold”? Really?

Vinegar: King just chokeslammed Daedalus over the railing and through the equipment table!

Covert Jay: He has to be broken in half!

Vegas: Really? You’re going with that stupid cliche?

Skye: In this case it’s completely accurate.

Vinegar: King is dragging Daedalus back to the ring with him along with a tangle of wires. Who knows what he has in mind.

Covert Jay: It’s bad for Tempest, whatever it is.

Vegas: Maybe he’s going to hang him.

Covert Jay: Like a Christmas ornament?

Vegas: Something like that.

Skye: That’s hideous.

Covert Jay: Christmas is wonderful!

Skye: That’s not what he’s talking about.

Covert Jay: What?

Skye: He’s being horrible again.

Covert Jay: Well that’s just mean.

Skye: That’s Vegas.

Vegas: I’m a fantastic person. You shut your mouth.

Skye: There was an unspoken word in there, wasn’t there.

Vegas: Yes.

Skye: It’s better for you that you didn’t say it.

Vinegar: It is.

Covert Jay: King is tying Daedalus to Kosnar. Those knots look painful.

Vegas: He has experience with straightjackets and restraints. He knows knots.

Covert Jay: He’s hanging them from the ring post!

Vinegar: He’s tied Daedalus to it so that he’s hanging from it by his hands. He’s secured Kosnar to it.

Covert Jay: His feet are still touching the floor.

Vegas: King made sure he was still incapacitated.

Covert Jay: Guys...

Vinegar: I’m sure that if Tempest had done that, that you’d be whining about how he was “cheating”.

Vegas: Shut the fuck up.

Skye: You know Nick is right.

Vegas: You can shut up too.

Skye: I liked you better when you were unconscious.

Covert Jay: Guys...

Vegas: You’re both jealous of my genius.

Skye: Absolutely nobody is jealous of you.

Covert Jay: Guys…

Vegas: What the hell do you want?

Covert Jay: Where’d Tempest go?

Vegas: What?

Covert Jay: Where’s Tempest?

Vegas: In the ring.

Vinegar: No. He’s not.

Vegas: What the fuck are you talking about?

Vinegar: Do your eyes work?



Vegas: I’ve been calling this match, haven’t I?

Vinegar: That’s not the slam dunk argument you think it is..

Skye: His eyes aren’t what’s broken.

Vegas: What the hell does that mean?

Skye: You figure it out.

Vinegar: King continues to look around the ring for Tempest, stalking around like an enraged animal.

Covert Jay: He looks like he’d upend the ring if he thought he’d find Tempest under it.

Skye: He’s past the point where thought factors into it.

Vinegar: That could be what Tempest needs to get the upper hand.

Covet Jay: You could say he already has.

Vinegar: What?

Skye: What do you mean?

Vegas: What shit are you babbling?

Covert Jay: Look up at the stage.

Vinegar: The stage?

Vegas: I don’t see him.

Skye: Look up. Way up.

Vegas: I still don’t see anything.

Vinegar: Look at the tron.

Vegas: What the fuck? Is he stupid?

Vinegar: No. Definitely not.

Vegas: Suicidal?

Vinegar: No. He’s utterly fearless.

Vegas: I think he’s stupid.

Vinegar: Thank you for that insightful analysis.

Vegas: Fuck you too.

Covert Jay: King just noticed!

Skye: He’s charging up the ramp like a wildman!

Covert Jay: He’s going to have to climb like Spider Man.

Vegas: More like Carnage, which is what he’s going to cause when he throws your fraud Champion off of the scaffolding.

Vinegar: Speaking of the frame for the Tron, Lab Rat King is at the bottom shaking it, as if he’s trying to topple it with Tempest ON it.

Vegas: If anyone has the power to, it’s the King.

Skye: Meanwhile, Tempest is up on top of it alternating between taunting King and cackling like a madman.

Vegas: He IS a madman if he’s going to taunt King! That’s a death sentence!

Covert Jay: The death sentence will be the drop if they fall off.

Vegas: King is still on the stage. Where’s he going to fall to?

Skye: We both know he’s going to climb.

Vegas: No we don’t.

Skye: Yes, we do. Lab Rat King is in one of his frenzies. The only thing he cares about is getting Tempest.

Covert Jay: He’s climbing!

Vinegar: Tempest continues to taunt him.

Covert Jay: Is Tempest throwing things at Lab Rat King?

Vinegar: He appears to be.

Skye: There goes a hammer!

Covert Jay: And a wrench!

Vinegar: It’s not slowing King at all!

Skye: The hammer looks like it grazed him on the side of his head.

Vegas: King is going to fucking kill him! I can’t wait to see it!

Skye: You’re a very sick man!

Vinegar: Lab Rat reaches the top and takes a cane shot between the eyes as soon as he looks up.

Covert Jay: Tempest is going to town on him!

Vegas: It’s not doing a fucking thing.



Covert Jay: It split Lab Rat open!

Skye: Lab Rat King is bleeding from his forehead.

Covert Jay: Do you see the look on his face? He looks like a rabid animal!

Vinegar: Somehow he’s managing to force Tempest back in spite of the repeated cane strikes. It’s amazing that he can see through all of the blood that’s running down his face!

Vegas: He’s been seeing red since losing his mask. This is nothing. He loves to feel and see his own blood.

Skye: King pulls himself up and takes a wild swing at Tempest. Tempest steps back and takes another swing with the cane, catching King between the eyes again. He rears back and swings again, this time going for King’s ribs.

Vegas: King caught it! Ha! What are you going to do now, you fucking fraud?!

Covert Jay: King just snapped the cane!

Vinegar: King takes another wild swing at Tempest, who ducks under it and chop blocks King in the knee. King stumbles, but stays on his feet.

Covert Jay: Why is Tempest smiling?

Vinegar: I don’t know, but that’s never a good thing.

Skye: King lunges forward and goes to envelop Tempest!

Vegas: The fool didn’t even move!

Skye: Why is he laughing?

Covert Jay: Oh my god!

Vinegar: Tempest just sunk his teeth into King’s face! King lets out another animalistic howl and tries to swat him off, but Tempest is locked on!

Skye: He’s trying to tear Tempest off and throw him away, but Tempest won’t let go!

Covert Jay: He’s snapping his head back and forth like an enraged animal!

Vinegar: It’s making the top of the framework sway a little!

Vegas: This isn’t a “falls count anywhere” match. Tempest can’t win it here! What the hell is the moron doing?!

Skye: Actually, he can win it here. It depends on what happens next!

Covert Jay: Tempest released him!

Vinegar: King looks almost surprised!

Vegas: What the fuck is that stupid little bastard doing now?

Skye: Uh oh!

Vinegar: No! No! No!

Vegas: This is an outrage! We’ll sue your shitty company out of existence for this!!

Covert Jay: Fuck me running!!

Vinegar: Holy shit!

Skye: Can anyone see them??

Covert Jay: No, but everyone heard them land!!

Vinegar: My god, what a sound!!!

Vegas: How can your bingo-hall indie dumpster of a company employ people like that?! That was attempted murder!!

Skye: Sure, except for the part where BOTH of them went over!!

Vegas: Details.

Vinegar: I don’t believe what I just saw!

Skye: There’s an army of backstage personnel and medics descending on the stage!

Vinegar: Tempest just threw BOTH himself AND Lab Rat King off of the BACK of the Tron!!

Vegas: That has to be a twenty foot drop!!

Skye: I don’t know what the hell they landed on, but it didn’t sound good!!

Covert Jay: We’re getting a camera back there!

Vinegar: My god. This match HAS to be over after that!!

Vegas: I bet that Lab Rat King will get up and put your pissant fraud of a Champion away!

Skye: Are you out of your mind? I don’t expect either of these men to move!

Vinegar: It’s such a mess back there now that we can’t even tell what they landed on!

Covert Jay: Except that Tempest landed on Lab Rat King.

Vinegar: I’m not sure that helped him very much.

Vegas: Tempest should be arrested on the spot!

Covert Jay: Get over yourself, Vegas!

Vegas: What? How fucking dare you??

Skye: Shut up, you embarrassment to the field of commentary.

Vinegar: The medics have both men on backboards and are getting ready to wheel them out of the arena.

Skye: We’re going to pull away from the backstage for a moment.

Vinegar: Ladies and gentlemen, we want everyone to know that the safety of the wrestlers is our most important priority, even for Chaos, slash Ultraviolent match workers like Tempest and Lab Rat King.

Skye: We promise everyone watching that both men will be taken to a local hospital and examined.

Vegas: We don’t say "hospital" in “The Buis”, we say “medical facility”. Get with the times.

Vinegar: We don’t say “the buis”. This isn’t Hollywood.

Vegas: Maybe I belong in Hollywood.

Skye: Only if they’re dropping the sign on you.

Vegas: Ha ha.

Covert Jay: ZING!!

Vegas: Shut up.

Skye: What a cutting comeback.

Vegas: You’re supposed to be on my side.

Vinegar: Nobody here is on your side.

Covert Jay: We’re cutting to the loading area!

Vegas: That was abrupt. What a horseshit operation.

Skye: It’s an Ultraviolent match, they’re abrupt.

Vinegar: We’re focusing backstage now and it’s utter chaos!

Vegas: You just had to get a cheap plug in for your inferior product.

Skye: Stop being an insulting prick.

Vinegar: Security is trying to break Tempest and Lab Rat King and get them back to the ambulance!

Skye: They’re launching UGWC and Carnage Security all over the backstage area!

Covert Jay: This is going to cost a lot in insurance payouts!

Vinegar: They finish demolishing Security and go back to trying to murder each other as they make their way back towards Gorilla.

Skye: Lab Rat King throws Tempest into a stack of metal bars, which loudly fall on top of him and onto the floor. King throws a handful of them aside before he grabs one and slams it across Tempest’s back.

Covert Jay: He just collapsed!

Vinegar: Lab Rat King fell to the floor as soon as he hit Tempest.

Skye: He’s clutching at his back, no doubt the after effects of that horrific landing!

Vinegar: Tempest pulls himself to his feet using a stack of nearby storage crates for help. He smiles evilly at Lab Rat King and pulls one of the metal rods up.

Covert Jay: He’s spinning it around like a Ninja.

Vegas: Ninja aren’t real. You’re an idiot in a Halloween mask.

Skye: Tempest drives the end of the rod into King’s lower back! He lets out an agonized howl and claws at his back.

Vinegar: Tempest strikes him again!

Covert Jay: He’s really working King’s back over!

Skye: That’s exactly what he should do!

Vegas: If he was a real man, he’d find another way to win.

Vinegar: Moving on. Tempest pulls King up and bounces him off of the far wall, then drives a shoulder into his stomach that slams his back into the wall. King crumples to the floor in pain as Tempest grabs him by his hair and begins to drag him across the backstage towards the curtain at gorilla.

Skye: He stopped.

Covert Jay: What’s he smiling about?

Vinegar: He just stepped out of the camera view.

Covert Jay: Not for long!

Skye: He has a sledgehammer!

Covert Jay: And he’s going to use it!

Vegas: That fucker!

Vinegar: It’s perfectly legal.

Vegas: It’s perfectly legal. Nyah.

Skye: You sound even more like a child than usual.

Vinegar: Tempest brings it down into King’s injured back!

Covert Jay: God that’s brutal!

Skye: King lets out another howl of pain and tries to grab Tempest, but he dodges out of the way with a mocking laugh and drives the sledgehammer head into King’s back again!

Vegas: I can’t believe this is being allowed!

Skye: I know this is a lot to ask, but stop being an idiot. You know full well how stupid that sounds.

Vinegar: Tempest drives the sledgehammer into King’s back again.

Vegas: He’s turning the sledgehammer around. What the hell for?

Covert Jay: We’re about to find out.

Vegas: He just broke the sledgehammer handle over his leg!

Vinegar: He drives the head back into King’s back again, then pulls him up!

Skye: King almost crumples back to the floor as his back gives out!

Covert Jay: Oh god!

Vegas: He could have taken King’s eye out!

Skye: The sound the broken handle end made when it struck his head was..

Covert Jay: Unsettling? Disturbing? Disgusting?

Skye: Those all work.

Vinegar: Tempest brings the broken handle down and grinds it into King’s forehead!

Covert Jay: Look at the blood spurting from it!

Vegas: “Shooting” is a better word.

Skye: King shoves Tempest away and staggers towards gorilla. Tempest follows and takes a wild swing at King, but he stumbles away from it.

Vinegar: King lashes out and drives a fist into his stomach, momentarily slowing Tempest.

Skye: His back seized up again!

Vinegar: King stumbles backwards past gorilla and out onto the stage!

Skye: He drops to his knees right as Tempest comes through the curtain behind him! Tempest winds up and goes for another sledgehammer blow to King’s profusely bleeding head.

Vegas: While the hell won’t White Rey do something?

Covert Jay: OW!!

Vegas: Hahahahaha!!! That’s going to change his voice by a few octaves.

Vinegar: Lab Rat King intercepts Tempest with a low blow.

Skye: King leaps to his feet!

Covert Jay: That didn’t go according to plan!

Skye: King’s back locks up again and he drops to one knee on the ramp!

Vinegar: Tempest lands another vicious sledgehammer blow to King’s forehead!

Skye: He’s rolling down the ramp!

Vinegar: Tempest follows him down and catches King right as he stops. He waits behind King as he slowly pushes himself to his hands and knees.

Covert Jay: Fuck me running!

Vegas: What does that even mean?

Skye: I don’t know, but it sounds appropriate!

Vinegar: Tempest connects with a “Boomstick” into the head of the sledgehammer and King goes limp on the floor!

Skye: He has to get King into the ring, which won’t be easy!

Vegas: Where the hell is he going?

Vinegar: It looks like he’s going to free Kosnar and Daedalus!

Covert Jay: For once, Kosnar looks PISSED.

Vinegar Tempest struggles with the cables that they’ve been tied with before he finally gets them freed! Tempest points under the ring.

Covert Jay: Kosnar and Daedalus are pulling furniture from under the ring.

Skye: Kosnar is sliding tables into the ring while Daealus slides chairs in.

Vinegar: Tempest checks on King, but he’s still down at ringside.

Covert Jay: And bleeding all over the floor!

Vegas: Of course he’s bleeding all over the floor! White has done nothing to protect him!

Skye: White Ray has done exactly what he’s supposed to do.

Vinegar: Tempest waives Kosnar over and the giant hefts King into the ring, where he lands in a heap.

Vegas: He didn’t “heft” him in. He threw him.

Vinegar: He’s in the ring. That’s what matters.

Vegas: You’re an uncaring dick.

Vinegar: I’m not taking moral criticism from you.

Skye: Kosnar has two tables set up, one on top of the other near the far corner. He looks at Tempest, who nods with an evil grin.

Vinegar: Kosnar pulls King from the canvas and hoists him up. King is still limp.

Covert Jay: Why is Tempest stopping him?

Vinegar: No. Not that! You might break his neck!

Skye: Flight 19!!!

Vinegar: King crashes through the tables!

Skye: Tempest immediately kicks the broken chair shards from the ring and he and Kosnar set up two more tables in the corner.

Vinegar: Kosnar pulls King up and climbs backwards up the ropes as he pulls King into position for the tombstone piledriver!

Covert Jay: I don’t know whether to be terrified by how this could go, or to be impressed by how terrifyingly powerful Kosnar is.

Skye: Kosnar goes up!

Vinegar: Kosnar comes down!! Connemara IV through the table!

Vegas: Holy fuck!!

Vinegar: Tempest drops on top of King for the cover!

Covert Jay: One!

Skye: Two!!

Vegas: NO!! HA!!

Skye: King kicked out!

Vinegar: He did, although it didn’t have a lot on it.

Skye: Kosnar goes to pull King up!

Covert Jay: Table for one!

Skye: That hurt me just seeing it!

Vinegar: Kosnar takes a broken table shard to the groin! King springs up and slams it into Tempest’s face, then charges Kosnar and knocks him from the ring with it!



Skye: He turns back towards Tempest, but sets a couple of chairs up and drops the table shard onto them.

Vinegar: He pulls Tempest up!

Covert Jay: WAY up!!

Skye: Empty, Hollow, Thud through the table shard and the chairs!!

Vinegar: He drops into the cover!

Skye: ONE!!

Vegas: TWO!!

Vinegar: THRE...NO!!!

Covert Jay: Daedalus broke it up!!

Vegas: Someone’s gonna diiiie!!!

Vinegar: Daedalus goes to escape, but King grabs him by his head and spins him around!

Skye: Empty, Hollow, Thud to Daedalus!!

Vegas: What the fuck??

Vinegar: Tempest just hit King in the back! King goes down to one knee!!

Skye: Tempest ascends the turnbuckle!

Vegas: What the hell did he hit King with?

Skye: King pulls himself up and turns towards Tempest! Tempest leaps!!

Vinegar: Another vicious weapon shot to the head!! King is down! Tempest drops on top!!

Skye: Here’s White with the count!!

Covert Jay: ONE!!!

Vinegar: TWO!!!

Vegas: THREE!!! NOOOOO!!! FIX!!!!... FIX!!!... FIX!!!

Vinegar: Tempest wins!!

Skye: What the hell is that weapon?

Vinegar: It looks like a Croquet Mallet!

Vegas: Who the hell uses a croquet mallet?

Vinegar: Tempest just did. White Rey holds up Tempest’s arm to signify that he’s the winner! The MAIN EVENT is NEXT as CARNAGE WORLD CHAMPION Catalina Cortes faces UGWC WORLD CHAMPION Sloane Taylor!!

[UGWC Staff]

Skye: Talk about your dream matches…

Vinegar: I couldn’t have portrayed it any better, Terra.

Vegas: These two bitches could have been twins.

Skye: Johnny, please…

Vinegar: You couldn’t find two competitors with more career parallels.

Skye: Leading both brands tonight, we have a pair of early-starters who have hit their strides early in professional wrestling.

Vinegar: These young women are truly an example for young women who are fans of combat sports - they’ve quickly made names for themselves in similar ways.

Skye: Both have held tag team gold, both have ridden a shaky wave to the top of their company, and both became world champions at only the most recent pay per view events.

Vegas: Practically virgins when it comes to defending championships.

Vinegar: While it’s true neither has been tested as a world champion as of yet, tonight will be a unique first stop on their journeys.

Skye: Let’s not forget that both are accomplished high flying technicians.

Covert Jay: Flippy shit!!

Vinegar: It all comes down to this match, as it probably should.

Skye: The count is three to three in wins tonight, and UGWC and Carnage are all tied up.

Vegas: The winner of this match will make the entire other brand look like a bunch of assholes.

A siren wails throughout the Nationwide Arena, drowning out the chatter of the Incursion crowd. In flashing gold letters, the Incursion-Crossover-Tron proclaims:

!!!CHAMPION APPROACHING!!!

The Legion members in attendance approve, the UGWC faithful and unfamiliar counterattack with jeers and confused murmurs. The lights blink out, and a hush falls over the crowd. A single spotlight finds a kneeling figure in the entryway, a well-placed stage fan making a checkerboard cape billow dramatically behind her. The Legion cheers again when POP/STARS vs MEGALOVANIA kicks in and the Tron transitions.

!!!CATALINA CORTES JOINS THE BATTLE!!!

The Lucha Princess stands, cape still billowing(extra dramatically), the Carnage World Championship worn like a bandolier across her chest. She unclasps the cape from her neck, letting the fan carry it into the crowd(still very dramatically), so that the attendees might battle for it. The Tron shifts again, flashing the champion’s name. Catalina points to the screen behind her and the Legion chants along.

!!!CATALINA CORTES!!!

Her arms extend out to her sides, then come together like two-tone lightning, right fist connecting with left palm. Her ring gear is the same obnoxious, black-and-white checkerboard pattern. One fingerless glove is black, the other white, an eighth grade level metaphor for duality. Her boots and kickpads are the same, the white one on the left reading CARNAGE and the black one on the right advertising TWITCH.TV/SUPERSMASHCAT in a smaller font so as to accommodate all the letters. She pulls the checkerboard ninja mask from her face, whipping it into the crowd, revealing black painted lips clashing with white eyeshadow.

Cat’s eyes lock onto the ring and she begins her long walk. A few fans in Carnage affiliated merch get their hands slapped by the champion, but she shuns any selfie poses or camera mugging. She dashes up the ring steps, pausing at the center of the apron to point one last time at the Carnage-Tron. The Legion echoes back.

!!!CATALINA CORTES!!!

Cat bounds off the bottom rope, backflipping over the top to land on her feet inside the ring. She unstraps her championship, hoisting it up in the center of the ring, for the benefit of those with flash photography. For a moment, there is a tease that her grandstanding is over, but then Cat bounds to the nearest turnbuckle and raises her title one more time, further inciting the crowd. Her need for adulation mostly satisfied, she hops back to the canvas, presenting her belt to the official and heading to her corner.

Multi-color lights flash over the stage settling on pink, Sloane emerging from the back full of energy and all smiles. She stops on the stage, raising the UGWC World Championship, and looks around her at the crowd, taking it all in before starting off down the ramp.

She greets the crowd both UGWC and Carnage fans alike, slapping hands and posing for quick selfies with the fans before rushing the ring. Sloane slides in under the bottom rope and springs to her feet, dancing around the ring and playing to the crowd, hyping them until her music ends.

Catalina sees the effect Sloane is having on the entirety of the attending fans, and decides to have herself some of that spotlight. She also dances around the ring, moving to the opposite side from Sloane and working the seats on that side. Sloane notices and moves over to that side as well.

Skye: Excellent shot of the two brightest stars in wrestling right now, each on a turnbuckle lifting their company’s belt and playing to the audience.

Vinegar: The crowd is absolutely eating this up.

Jay: HUTTAH!!

The music winds down as a mic is lowered into the ring, and Mitchell Dennis steps up to introduce the competitors. Taylor and Cortes descend to stand on either side of him, each of them twitching and hopping, feeding off the energy filling the arena.

Dennis: The following contest is for one fall! Introducing first, standing five foot four inches, and weighing in at one hundred twenty-one pounds, from Chicago, Illinois, she is the Sky Queen, and your Unified Global Wrestling Coalition World Champion…. SLOANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNE TAYLLLLLLLLLLLLOR!!!

Taylor breaks away from the face to face position and raises the UGWC belt in both hands as the crowd erupts.

Dennis: And her opponent, standing five foot two inches, and weighing in at one hundred nineteen pound, from Pasadena, California, she is the Lucha Princess, and your Carnage World Champion, CATTTTTTTTTTTTTALINA CORTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTES!!!

Cortes turns away to hop up on to the bottom rope and pump the Carnage belt to get the crowd worked up again.

Dennis: This is our final non-title, champion versus champion match, for bragging rights to go to the winner’s home company. I present to you, your main event, World Champions battle, CATALINA CORTES VERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUS SLOANE TAYLOR!!!

Claude de Rhombus rings the hell out of the bell as Dennis exits the ring.

Vinegar: Taylor and Cortes move in close, eye to eye, not breaking their gaze as referee Glenn Burke comes around to collect their titles.

Skye: They begin to revolve around one another, still holding that staredown, and they’re really cranking up the tension in here.

Vegas: Why is the crowd getting louder? They haven’t done any-damn-thing yet.

Jay: That’s showmanship, Johnny!

Vegas: It’s boring. Hit her!!

Vinegar: Oh!

Skye: Leaping facebuster from Cortes, and we’re off!

Vinegar: Catalina immediately rushing to the ropes for a moonsault on Sloane!

Skye: She bounces to her feet and turns for a somersault legdrop!

Vegas: Magmalina taking the early lead here as she rolls Sloane up for an early pinfall!



One!!



Covert Jay: Bubblegum escape!

Skye: Sloane kicking out, it’s too soon for her to eat a pin now.

Vinegar: Kipping up, Sloane turns to see Catalina in the corner, big smile on her face but in a ready stance.

Vegas: Cortes drawing the early line in the sand.

Skye: You might remember it was a little over a year ago when Taylor got the drop on Cortes at Act of Defiance 2020, eliminating her from the Ultraviolent Tournament.

Vinegar: That must have weighed heavily on Cortes’ mind over the past year, especially since Sloane won that tournament.

Vegas: Of course it did! How do you think she was able to push herself to become the world champion at this year’s Act of Defiance? The Carnage World Championship is her ticket to vengeance!

Skye: I’m not sure it’s that serious, Johnny.

Vinegar: Handspring set up from Taylor, but she telegraphs and Cortes moves out of the way.

Covert Jay: Wrong! It was a feint, Sloane drops to the mat suddenly and sweeps Catalina’s legs from under her as she darts to the left!

Skye: Mushroom stomp from the Final Girl!

Vinegar: Followed up by a beautiful shiranui, and now it’s Sloane’s turn to roll up the Rudo Royal!



One!!



Covert Jay: Lucha kickout!

Vegas: What the hell is a Lucha kickout?

Skye: Both champions feeling one another out in the first several minutes of this match.

Vinegar: They’re probing for weaknesses and chinks in the armor, but so far, no purchase!

Skye: Both back to their feet now, they run at one another…

Vinegar: Slingblade from Taylor!

Skye: Cortes pops right back up and grabs at Taylor for a cross armbreaker!

Vinegar: Taylor rolls through the hold and to her feet, dragging Cortes up to whip her into the ropes.

Covert Jay: TIGER FEINT KICK!

Skye: But Cortes transitions into a backflip, back up to a standing position!

Vegas: Here comes Sloane!

Covert Jay: TILT A WHIRL HEADSCISSORS from Gatita del Fuego!

Vinegar: Incredible agility there, and here’s another cover from the Carnage Champion.



One!!





Two!!





Vegas: Damn, Coalition bitch kicks out.

Vinegar: Hey, easy, man.

Vegas: Bite me, Nick.

Skye: Both women regrouping now, heading for opposite corners.

Covert Jay: Listen to that crowd!

Crowd: THIS IS AWESOME!! clap clap clapclapclap THIS IS AWESOME!! clap clap clapclapclap THIS IS AWESOME!! clap clap clapclapclap

Vinegar: Indeed it is, great displays of athleticism from both champions tonight.

Skye: Cortes sprints toward Taylor suddenly.

Vinegar: Taylor sees her coming and hops up onto the second ropes, diving over her for a sunset flip!

Skye: The rollup doesn’t take, though, as Cortes rolls to one side, hooking her legs around Sloane’s head.

Vinegar: Looks like she’s going for some hold… but no, the UGWC Champ pushes herself into a handstand!

Skye: Cortes not bothered, reaches out and grabs the ropes, executing some sort of… upside down hurricanrana?

Vinegar: Well, she sort of cartwheeled over Sloane, legs still hooked around her head, which shot Taylor’s body outward from the ropes and dropped her flat on her back.

Vegas: Unorthodox, but effective, that’s how we breed them in Carnage.

Skye: Breed them? Ugh.

Covert Jay: Yeah! Go Cortes!!

Vinegar: Jay!

Covert Jay: I can’t help it. She’s so charismatic. Look how she’s tapping her head, signalling to the crowd that she thought up that move on the spot.

Skye: Reverse frankensteiner from Taylor!

Vinegar: And there’s the roll up Sloane was looking for earlier!





One!!



Two!!



Covert Jay: Cortes gets the shoulder up!

Skye: I thought for sure that frankensteiner was the end of it!

Vegas: Hey, rep your brand, Terra.

Skye: Call the match, edgelord.

Vinegar: Sloane sighs, frustrated, but pushes herself back up.

Skye: Cortes getting unsteadily to her feet.

Vinegar: The Sky Queen has decided it’s time to fly, and she’s climbing the turnbuckles!!

Covert Jay: Shooting star press!! Did you see the height on that?!

Skye: Sloane covering Cortes again…



One!!





Two!!





Thr--No!



Vinegar: Referee Glenn Burke pointing to where Catalina got her foot on the rope, and Sloane can’t believe it!

Vegas: Yeah, get mad!

Skye: Taylor’s got the sides of her head in her hands, she’s absolutely stunned that Cortes had the wherewithal to save herself from the pinfall.

Vinegar: Bubblegum princess getting to her feet, that look of shock still on her face, as she backs off to come up with another plan of attack.

Skye: She turns suddenly, running at Cortes and dropping down for a basement dropkick.

Covert Jay: Whaaat??

Vinegar: I can’t believe my eyes, folks, Cortes just reached up and grabbed the bottom rope, and used it to pivot her body around in a circle so that Taylor’s dropkick slid right past her, under the rope, and out onto the floor!



Vegas: And Sloane eats shit on the outside!

Skye: Cortes completes her rotation, then pulls herself up inside the ring, looking out at the crowd and spreading her arms.

Vinegar: They’re showing her how much they appreciate the quick thinking, but now she’s pointing at where Taylor landed and raising up one hand with a questioning look on her face.

Skye: She nods as if she’s been given approval, then turns and takes off running.

Vinegar: Leap up onto the ropes…

Skye: Shooting star press onto Sloane on the outside!!

Covert Jay: I think I just pooped. Excuse me.

Skye: No… you didn’t… really?

Vinegar: Folks, Covert Jay has apparently had an emergency as Catalina paid back Sloane’s earlier shooting star press with an even more dangerous one of her own.

Vegas: Don’t hurry back…

Skye: Back at ringside, Burke has signalled for some help, and several officials and medical personnel have arrived and are checking on both World Champions.

Vinegar: They have them separated as they check on them, but from what we can tell it seems like they’re not seriously injured.

Skye: Sloane suddenly pushes through the officials checking her out and dashes to where Cortes is being looked over.

Vinegar: Up onto the security barrier, moonsault plancha into the crowd around Catalina!!

Skye: Both competitors laid out again, and now their medical team too!

Vinegar: Cortes crawls toward the ring steps, struggling to get her feet under her as Taylor grips the ring skirt to pull herself up.

Skye: They both get to the apron at the same time, but are still trying to get to their feet.

Vinegar: Whoever…. What’s this?

Skye: Isn’t that your Creative Director?

Orson: Huttah.

Vinegar: Why are you wearing that blue fry cook uniform?

Orson: I… uh… had to change clothes because I shit myself, remember?

Skye: What? You too?

Vegas: What the fuck is going on here?

Orson; Me too? Don’t you recognize me? I’m Culver’s Jay.

Vinegar: Oh god…

Skye: You’re… who…. What?

Orson… er… Culver’s Jay: I couldn’t abandon my commentary duties for the entire match, could I?

Vegas: I am completely lost.

Culver’s Jay: Let’s get back to this deluxe main event.

Vinegar: Both champions have managed to get their feet under them on either end of the apron, and now they’re running for each other.

Culver’s Jay: SILVER LINING ON THE APRON!!

Vinegar: That has to be the most painful looking version of Sloane’s signature I’ve ever seen!

Vegas: But was it worth it?

Skye: The impact knocked Cortes back to the floor, and Taylor is reeling on the apron.

Vinegar: She’s got to capitalize quickly, this could be it!

Culver’s Jay: Looks like the UGWC Champ doesn’t think it’s enough.

Skye: Fighting against the pain she must be feeling, Taylor pulls herself up and to the turnbuckles.

Vinegar: She’s climbing!

Culver’s Jay: I know what this is!!

Skye: She’s setting up for the very move that put Catalina out of the Ultraviolent Battle Royal last year!

Vinegar: Catalina wobbly as she slowly gets to her feet.

Vegas: Sloane is picking her spot…

Skye: Cortes turns toward the ring…

Culver’s Jay: SKYFALL!!

Vinegar: NO!!

Skye: Incredibly, Cortes noticed at the last possible second and dodged the maneuver!

Vegas: Chalk that up to knowing all too well what it looks like when it’s coming at you!

Vinegar: What’s worse, she’s managed to grab hold of Taylor as the Sky Queen caught air, and now she’s holding onto her head.

Skye: With a shout to the crowd, she dives forward…

Culver’s Jay: CATA-CLYSM!!

Vinegar: For only having met in the ring, these two seem to know each other like mirrored images!

Vegas: They even both have had Tag Team Championships with flaky tag team partners and questionable managers!

Culver’s Jay: Tag Team? Scoff.

Vinegar: You know what he means Hold-- I mean Culver’s Jay.

Skye: Catalina rolling Sloane into the ring, and now she seems to take a moment to decide if it’s enough…

Vinegar: She makes up her mind and climbs the turnbuckle!!

Skye: Here it comes!

Culver’s Jay: SILVER AR-- hey who is that?

Skye: Oh no… it’s the Masked Debaters being led to ringside by Ragdoll!

Vinegar: Catalina noticed them just before she leapt, and now she’s climbing down cautiously as they surround the ring they climb up on the apron.

Vegas: Ungrateful wench… the Carnage cavalry arrives to back her up and she’s asking them not to.

Vinegar: Here come the big damn heroes!

Culver’s Jay: Hide Yamazaki, Travis Pierce, Sebastian Everett-Bryce…

Vegas: The Third.

Culver’s Jay: Donovan Hastings, Dave Rydell, and Lucy Wylde all rush down to the ring as well, each of them engaging one of the Masked Debaters.

Skye: Lucy herself squaring up to Ragdoll!

Vinegar: Glenn Burke desperately trying to restore order as the brawl erupts and spills into the ring.

Skye: Catalina trying to stay away from the melee, but desperately trying to see through the fracas to find her opponent and finish the match.

Vinegar: Burke is down! Burke is down!

Culver’s Jay: The Debaters are attacking their own champ!

Vegas: Serves her right.

Skye: This is treachery against the brand!

Vinegar: They’re going after Sloane too!!

Skye: Who are they out here representing??

Vinegar: Who is that?

Skye: It’s Christopher Marlowe!! Former tag team partner to Catalina Cortes!

Vinegar: He hits the ring running, nailing the tallest Debater with a massive uppercut driving them into the corner.

Culver’s Jay: He’s not done yet!

Vegas: That’s three, no four running uppercuts to the Debater!

Skye: He calls that the Taburpaine!

Vinegar: Marlowe finally comes back to check on Cortes, helping her to her feet.

Skye: They lock eyes, then take off toward the biggest Debater

Culver’s Jay: MASSACRES IN PARIS!

Vinegar: After that, Marlowe drop down to the floor and disappears into the crowd>

Vegas: What was the point of that?

Culver’s Jay: KILLING JOKE from Ragdoll to Cortes!!

Skye: This drunken maniac will do anything for a dollar!

Vegas: So will I, to be honest.

Vinegar: Donovan is knocking people away as Sloane regains her feet.

Skye: I thought you said they didn’t like each other?

Vinegar: They’re on the same team tonight.

Skye: Sloane notices Ragdoll climbing off of Catalina, and makes her way over, but she kneels down to check on her instead of pinning her.

Vegas: This is her best opportunity to snatch the victory for UGWC.

Vinegar: Sloane shakes her head slowly.

Culver’s Jay: Sloane doesn’t want to win this way!

Vegas: What a moron.

Vinegar: Hastings snarls, then grabs Sloane.

Culver’s Jay: DESTINY’S CALL ON HIS OWN WORLD CHAMP!

Vinegar: No!!

Skye: What is he doing??

Vegas: Yes! He drags Catalina Cortes over and lays her on top of Sloane.

Vinegar: Rousing Burke, Hastings points out the pinfall, and Burke has no choice but to count!



One!!!















Two!!!!











Three!!!



Dennis: Your winner, Carnage World Champion, Catalina COOOOOOOOOOOOOORTES!!

Vegas: Yeah!!! Carnage wins the Incursion!!

Skye: I’m going to be sick. Not like this. Not like this.

Vinegar: The ultimate betrayal has just taken place before our eyes, ladies and gentlemen, and I’m sorry but we’re out of time!

The show closes on Hastings exiting the ring as officials and security streams out to break up the chaos.

[UGWC Staff]

Credits

GFX
Mike

Opener
Steve

10 Person Co-Op
Steve

Avenger vs Centurion
Steve

"I Quit" Match
Jay & Joe

Cooperative Match
Chuck

Lab Rat King vs Tempest
Ad

Main Event
B

[wwjbcd]