Post by Lord Hastings on Oct 18, 2010 19:03:19 GMT -5
"Warrior" is playing in the arena as pyros explode all around.
Viengar: Welcome, one and all, to UGWC Battleground!
Covert Jay: HUTTAH!
Lieberjosch: We've got a stacked card tonight, four title matches, and of course the headlining namesake, the Battleground Match!
Vinegar: And we're starting off Battleground with a war that has apparently been waging for years and years before any of us knew about it.
Lieberjosch: Or cared to...
Vinegar: Regardless, "One Taste" Poison and "The Unholy Pope" Osiris Blackhart have had bad blood for an age, and tonight will not be their first meeting.
Covert Jay: But if Ol' Charlie Manson in Whiteface has his way, this will be the last!
Lieberjosch: I get the feeling Poison had her fill when she supposedly mutilated Blackhart's son, and if that's so obvious, I'm not sure why she's here and not serving time on Death Row.
Covert Jay: Walkin da mile, walkin da mile, walkin da Green Mile!
"The best excuse in the World...to join the party" is spoken over the PA.. And the crowd immediately erupt into a deafening chorus of cheers.
Dennis: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Dallas, Texas, and weighing in at 112 pounds, she is The Manic Machiavellian, "One Taste" POIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISONNNNNNNNNNNNN!
The arena plunges to darkness as aggressive riff of "Dirty World" by Dope slams over the PA system, sending shock waves through the speakers almost muting the noise from the crowd. Flickering lights of lime green flash around the dark, wide open space as the floor beneath the crowds feet trembles with the music. A thick layer of green fog slithers down the entrance ramp, creeping into the ring and lingering heavily in the air. As images of The One and Only Poison flash on the titan tron, she parts the black curtain and strides confidently onto the ramp.
Vinegar: In recent weeks, we've had to wonder about the loyalty of DarkBain to his master, and his intentions with The First Lady of Pain.
Her eyes burn with intensity and hate, her body pounding with adrenaline and her blood lust on her mind as she makes her way down to the ring, sliding beneath the bottom rope and waits for her next victim.
Reach out and touch faith!
Dennis: And her opponent, from the Omega Domination Compound, The Sadisitic God, The Unholy Pope, Osiris BLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLACKHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHART!
The lights dim as alone spot light hits the entrance ramp. "Personal Jesus" by Marilyn Manson plays as a long shadow entices the ramp. The lights come back as the pale Osirus Blackhart emerges from the curtain. Dressed in a black robe and a black pope hat, Osirus waltz with regal air, as his monsterous bodyguard trails behind him. Osirus walks up the steps and enters the ring to swirling fog and flickering lights of deep blue. The monsterous DarkBain undresses his master and escapes the ring just as the lights return to normal.
Lieberjosch: Speaking of the devil, the monster DarkBain is here. That's one I would like to see mix it up in the ring a few times.
Covert Jay: I don't think that would be conducive to his master's wishes.
Lieberjosch: What?
Vinegar: As the lights come up, the crowd is growing in intensity while Blackhart and Poison stare each other down. Poison is circling the dark cult leader, and she's actually licking her lips!
Lieberjosch: Blackhart, meanwhile, is calmly turning only when he has to, rage and hate filled eyes scanning Poison's every move.
Covert Jay: If this were a WB drama, they'd be secretly lovers.
Lieberjosch: God...
Vinegar: You can cut the tension with a knife, and at a place like Battleground, that's going to lead to blood. Both of these fighters have shown technical skill, but that can quickly devolve into all out brawling with such personal history between them.
Lieberjosch: Blackhart, tiring of the stalking Poison, snarls as he lashes out with a forearm.
Covert Jay: That Poison easily ducks, hitting a spear!
Vinegar: Blackhart not rattled, bounces back to his feet and bulldogs Poison. Poison back to her feet almost instantly and grabs the hair of The Unholy Pope, slamming him facefirst into the ringpost!
Lieberjosch: It didn't take this one long to dive into garbage wrestling as Poison continues to smash Blackhart's face.
Covert Jay: Osiris plants his hands and drives an elbow back into the face of The Succubus!
Vinegar: Poison staggers, and Blackhart nails a DDT!
Lieberjosch: He's back on his feet in a second, glaring down at Poison, and wasting precious time as she starts to crawl away.
Vinegar: Blackhart grins evilly as he grabs Poison by the hair and drags her to the ropes, rubbing her face back and forth.
Covert Jay: Southern Sri Lankan Rope Burn!
Lieberjosch: That move doesn't have a name.
Covert Jay: If you read Article KY3 of my book...
Vinegar: YOU wrote a book?
Covert Jay: Yes, about calling wrestling matches properly. In that article I define how EVERY move must have a name, even if you make it up on the spot!
Lieberjosch: Hazel East dragging Blackhart away as he begins using the rope to choke Poison.
Vinegar: East is going to have a job of it keeping this match clean.
Lieberjosch: Already she is failing as Osiris breaks away to run back at the prone Poison, but "One Taste" moves at the last second and pulls down the rope as Blackhart flies through to the outside!
Covert Jay: Poison with a slingshot crossbody!
Vinegar: Poison climbs back up, and pulls Blackhart up as well, whipping him roughly into one of our cameramen!
Covert Jay: She doesn't waste any time, but leaps into the tangle of bodies, firing fist after fist into the confusion!
Lieberjosch: East is yelling for the combatants to get back in the ring, and Poison finally lets up enough to untangle Blackhart and roll him back into the ring!
Vinegar: Climbing back in herself, but Blackhart is there, firing knife-edged chops to keep her on the ropes!
Lieberjosch: East warning him about the ropes again, and he flings Poison across the ring, she hits the rope, rebound...
Vinegar: WHAT A HEADBUTT TO THE FACE!
Lieberjosch: Poison goes down like a board, and Osiris moves in for a cover...
1
2.. kick out!
Covert Jay: The Unholy Pope moves back for a second, then delivers a cheap kick to the midsection of Poison!
Vinegar: Poison forced to sit up and she's coughing as blood runs from her nose. Blackhart laughs maniacally and drags her back to her feet by the hair. He whips her across the ring, looking for another headbutt...
Lieberjosch: Poison spits blood right in Blackharts face, stopping him cold!
Vinegar: Blackhart wipes the muck out of his eyes, then swings a wild clothesline from hell!
Lieberjosch: Poison ducks, underhook overhead suplex!
Covert Jay: Uranage Barrage!
Lieberjosch: Oh god, there's no move called Uranage Barrage...
Vinegar: Actually, as she is picking up Osiris up for another underhook overhead suplex, she begins a series called the Uranage Barrage!
Lieberjosch: Really?
Covert Jay: Three! Three suplexes! Uranage Barrage!
Vinegar: Going for number four--NO! Osiris Blackhart turns it into a swinging neckbreaker!
Lieberjosch: A desparate save as both fighters are now laid on the mat not moving!
Vinegar: East beginning a count, but Osiris is showing signs of life first.
Lieberjosch: Poison isn't far behind!
Vinegar: Both run for each other, Poison going for a flying forearm, but Blackhart pushes her off, both hit the ropes, rebound...
Lieberjosch: The Unholy Pope loops around, full nelson facebuster!
Vinegar: Another pinning attempt!
1
2
Covert Jay: Nearly three, but Poison kicks out at the last possible second!
Vinegar: Blackhart is clearly losing any composure he had left, and he grabs Poison in a vicious sleeperhold, snarling and growling the whole time!
Lieberjosch: Poison is trying to get into a bridge, she plants her feet!
Vinegar: Blackhart screaming in hate, he's a man possessed!
Lieberjosch: Poison swings a leg out, using the momentum to reverse her position, and turns it into a tie-up!
Covert Jay: Blackhart trying for a spinebuster, but Poison jumps over...
Vinegar: YOSHI TONIC!
1
2
Lieberjosch: Blackhart kicks out!
Vinegar: Poison showing an amazing agility there, turning the tables.
Lieberjosch: But Osiris doesn't stay down, he's quick to his feet, but Poison returns with a lowblow! East?!
Covert Jay: No! She didn't see it!
Lieberjosch: Typical!
Vinegar: VENOM!
Lieberjosch: No, it's not locked in!
Covert Jay: Blackhart reverses the position, THE CRUCIFIXION!
Vinegar: This is it! Osiris moves in to make the final cover!
Covert Jay: GREEN MIST... with some blood mixed in!
Lieberjosch: Dirty move by Poison as she spits like a cobra into the eyes of Osiris Blackhart!
Vinegar: Follows up quickly...LAST TASTE!
1
2
3!!!!
Vinegar: Poison has done it!
Lieberjosch: This blood feud is far from over, Osiris looks stunned as Poison is about to exit, but he climbs to his feet and yells something to her.
Vinegar: Poison turns, SUPERKICK!
Covert Jay: The First Lady of Pain didn't even have time to celebrate!
Vinegar: The Unholy Pope is asking for his robe, and from it he pulls out... a wooden cross!
Covert Jay: Apparently, having seen Silence Becomes, he must think her a vampire and wants to slay her?
Lieberjosch: He is closing in on her as East tries to intervene.
Vinegar: Blackhart shoves East brutally across the ring, the raises the cross above his head! Wait, DarkBain has entered the ring, and he doesn't look too happy.
Lieberjosch: Must have ran out of beer. I think he has a problem.
Covert Jay: Is that Ninja?
Vinegar: I don't know but DarkBain has just attacked Osirus Blackhart! Those forearm guards with spikes are just slashing the Unholy Pope! My god, we saw this when they debuted nearly a month ago.
Lieberjosch: I don't see Poison... wait there she is. We just started and someone is already trying to kill someone.
Vinegar: Poison has a noose! No! We know he's a sick man but he shouldn't be hanged.
Covert Jay: Way of the ninja!
Vinegar: How, Jay? Osirus and Poison wrestled a close and confrontationial match and DarkBain has attacked him like a pitbull off a leash. Now they are choking him with a noose!
Lieberjosch: Not just choking... they're gonna hang him! And Osirus has no friends in the back! I knew a public execution would come of this!
Vinegar: Think again, doc! Someone has hit the ring to save... Is that?
Covert Jay: NUTCASE!
Lieberjosch: Wow, Jay learned a new word. And yes, it's "The Virus" Lucien Valentine. He's saved the Unholy Pope and he is knocking DarkBain around. Christ where he learn to box like that? That's "Sugar" Shane Mosley speed!
Covert Jay: Get with the times, Lieberjosch! Valentine is whooping DarkBain like he's Manny Pacquiao!
Vinegar: Forget refrences. Poison has left, with an evil glee in her eyes. And DarkBain is following her like a lost puppy. But Osirus is saved.. by Valentine!
Poison: 10
Osirus: 5
Viengar: Welcome, one and all, to UGWC Battleground!
Covert Jay: HUTTAH!
Lieberjosch: We've got a stacked card tonight, four title matches, and of course the headlining namesake, the Battleground Match!
Vinegar: And we're starting off Battleground with a war that has apparently been waging for years and years before any of us knew about it.
Lieberjosch: Or cared to...
Vinegar: Regardless, "One Taste" Poison and "The Unholy Pope" Osiris Blackhart have had bad blood for an age, and tonight will not be their first meeting.
Covert Jay: But if Ol' Charlie Manson in Whiteface has his way, this will be the last!
Lieberjosch: I get the feeling Poison had her fill when she supposedly mutilated Blackhart's son, and if that's so obvious, I'm not sure why she's here and not serving time on Death Row.
Covert Jay: Walkin da mile, walkin da mile, walkin da Green Mile!
"The best excuse in the World...to join the party" is spoken over the PA.. And the crowd immediately erupt into a deafening chorus of cheers.
Dennis: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Dallas, Texas, and weighing in at 112 pounds, she is The Manic Machiavellian, "One Taste" POIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISONNNNNNNNNNNNN!
The arena plunges to darkness as aggressive riff of "Dirty World" by Dope slams over the PA system, sending shock waves through the speakers almost muting the noise from the crowd. Flickering lights of lime green flash around the dark, wide open space as the floor beneath the crowds feet trembles with the music. A thick layer of green fog slithers down the entrance ramp, creeping into the ring and lingering heavily in the air. As images of The One and Only Poison flash on the titan tron, she parts the black curtain and strides confidently onto the ramp.
Vinegar: In recent weeks, we've had to wonder about the loyalty of DarkBain to his master, and his intentions with The First Lady of Pain.
Her eyes burn with intensity and hate, her body pounding with adrenaline and her blood lust on her mind as she makes her way down to the ring, sliding beneath the bottom rope and waits for her next victim.
Reach out and touch faith!
Dennis: And her opponent, from the Omega Domination Compound, The Sadisitic God, The Unholy Pope, Osiris BLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLACKHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHART!
The lights dim as alone spot light hits the entrance ramp. "Personal Jesus" by Marilyn Manson plays as a long shadow entices the ramp. The lights come back as the pale Osirus Blackhart emerges from the curtain. Dressed in a black robe and a black pope hat, Osirus waltz with regal air, as his monsterous bodyguard trails behind him. Osirus walks up the steps and enters the ring to swirling fog and flickering lights of deep blue. The monsterous DarkBain undresses his master and escapes the ring just as the lights return to normal.
Lieberjosch: Speaking of the devil, the monster DarkBain is here. That's one I would like to see mix it up in the ring a few times.
Covert Jay: I don't think that would be conducive to his master's wishes.
Lieberjosch: What?
Vinegar: As the lights come up, the crowd is growing in intensity while Blackhart and Poison stare each other down. Poison is circling the dark cult leader, and she's actually licking her lips!
Lieberjosch: Blackhart, meanwhile, is calmly turning only when he has to, rage and hate filled eyes scanning Poison's every move.
Covert Jay: If this were a WB drama, they'd be secretly lovers.
Lieberjosch: God...
Vinegar: You can cut the tension with a knife, and at a place like Battleground, that's going to lead to blood. Both of these fighters have shown technical skill, but that can quickly devolve into all out brawling with such personal history between them.
Lieberjosch: Blackhart, tiring of the stalking Poison, snarls as he lashes out with a forearm.
Covert Jay: That Poison easily ducks, hitting a spear!
Vinegar: Blackhart not rattled, bounces back to his feet and bulldogs Poison. Poison back to her feet almost instantly and grabs the hair of The Unholy Pope, slamming him facefirst into the ringpost!
Lieberjosch: It didn't take this one long to dive into garbage wrestling as Poison continues to smash Blackhart's face.
Covert Jay: Osiris plants his hands and drives an elbow back into the face of The Succubus!
Vinegar: Poison staggers, and Blackhart nails a DDT!
Lieberjosch: He's back on his feet in a second, glaring down at Poison, and wasting precious time as she starts to crawl away.
Vinegar: Blackhart grins evilly as he grabs Poison by the hair and drags her to the ropes, rubbing her face back and forth.
Covert Jay: Southern Sri Lankan Rope Burn!
Lieberjosch: That move doesn't have a name.
Covert Jay: If you read Article KY3 of my book...
Vinegar: YOU wrote a book?
Covert Jay: Yes, about calling wrestling matches properly. In that article I define how EVERY move must have a name, even if you make it up on the spot!
Lieberjosch: Hazel East dragging Blackhart away as he begins using the rope to choke Poison.
Vinegar: East is going to have a job of it keeping this match clean.
Lieberjosch: Already she is failing as Osiris breaks away to run back at the prone Poison, but "One Taste" moves at the last second and pulls down the rope as Blackhart flies through to the outside!
Covert Jay: Poison with a slingshot crossbody!
Vinegar: Poison climbs back up, and pulls Blackhart up as well, whipping him roughly into one of our cameramen!
Covert Jay: She doesn't waste any time, but leaps into the tangle of bodies, firing fist after fist into the confusion!
Lieberjosch: East is yelling for the combatants to get back in the ring, and Poison finally lets up enough to untangle Blackhart and roll him back into the ring!
Vinegar: Climbing back in herself, but Blackhart is there, firing knife-edged chops to keep her on the ropes!
Lieberjosch: East warning him about the ropes again, and he flings Poison across the ring, she hits the rope, rebound...
Vinegar: WHAT A HEADBUTT TO THE FACE!
Lieberjosch: Poison goes down like a board, and Osiris moves in for a cover...
1
2.. kick out!
Covert Jay: The Unholy Pope moves back for a second, then delivers a cheap kick to the midsection of Poison!
Vinegar: Poison forced to sit up and she's coughing as blood runs from her nose. Blackhart laughs maniacally and drags her back to her feet by the hair. He whips her across the ring, looking for another headbutt...
Lieberjosch: Poison spits blood right in Blackharts face, stopping him cold!
Vinegar: Blackhart wipes the muck out of his eyes, then swings a wild clothesline from hell!
Lieberjosch: Poison ducks, underhook overhead suplex!
Covert Jay: Uranage Barrage!
Lieberjosch: Oh god, there's no move called Uranage Barrage...
Vinegar: Actually, as she is picking up Osiris up for another underhook overhead suplex, she begins a series called the Uranage Barrage!
Lieberjosch: Really?
Covert Jay: Three! Three suplexes! Uranage Barrage!
Vinegar: Going for number four--NO! Osiris Blackhart turns it into a swinging neckbreaker!
Lieberjosch: A desparate save as both fighters are now laid on the mat not moving!
Vinegar: East beginning a count, but Osiris is showing signs of life first.
Lieberjosch: Poison isn't far behind!
Vinegar: Both run for each other, Poison going for a flying forearm, but Blackhart pushes her off, both hit the ropes, rebound...
Lieberjosch: The Unholy Pope loops around, full nelson facebuster!
Vinegar: Another pinning attempt!
1
2
Covert Jay: Nearly three, but Poison kicks out at the last possible second!
Vinegar: Blackhart is clearly losing any composure he had left, and he grabs Poison in a vicious sleeperhold, snarling and growling the whole time!
Lieberjosch: Poison is trying to get into a bridge, she plants her feet!
Vinegar: Blackhart screaming in hate, he's a man possessed!
Lieberjosch: Poison swings a leg out, using the momentum to reverse her position, and turns it into a tie-up!
Covert Jay: Blackhart trying for a spinebuster, but Poison jumps over...
Vinegar: YOSHI TONIC!
1
2
Lieberjosch: Blackhart kicks out!
Vinegar: Poison showing an amazing agility there, turning the tables.
Lieberjosch: But Osiris doesn't stay down, he's quick to his feet, but Poison returns with a lowblow! East?!
Covert Jay: No! She didn't see it!
Lieberjosch: Typical!
Vinegar: VENOM!
Lieberjosch: No, it's not locked in!
Covert Jay: Blackhart reverses the position, THE CRUCIFIXION!
Vinegar: This is it! Osiris moves in to make the final cover!
Covert Jay: GREEN MIST... with some blood mixed in!
Lieberjosch: Dirty move by Poison as she spits like a cobra into the eyes of Osiris Blackhart!
Vinegar: Follows up quickly...LAST TASTE!
1
2
3!!!!
Vinegar: Poison has done it!
Lieberjosch: This blood feud is far from over, Osiris looks stunned as Poison is about to exit, but he climbs to his feet and yells something to her.
Vinegar: Poison turns, SUPERKICK!
Covert Jay: The First Lady of Pain didn't even have time to celebrate!
Vinegar: The Unholy Pope is asking for his robe, and from it he pulls out... a wooden cross!
Covert Jay: Apparently, having seen Silence Becomes, he must think her a vampire and wants to slay her?
Lieberjosch: He is closing in on her as East tries to intervene.
Vinegar: Blackhart shoves East brutally across the ring, the raises the cross above his head! Wait, DarkBain has entered the ring, and he doesn't look too happy.
Lieberjosch: Must have ran out of beer. I think he has a problem.
Covert Jay: Is that Ninja?
Vinegar: I don't know but DarkBain has just attacked Osirus Blackhart! Those forearm guards with spikes are just slashing the Unholy Pope! My god, we saw this when they debuted nearly a month ago.
Lieberjosch: I don't see Poison... wait there she is. We just started and someone is already trying to kill someone.
Vinegar: Poison has a noose! No! We know he's a sick man but he shouldn't be hanged.
Covert Jay: Way of the ninja!
Vinegar: How, Jay? Osirus and Poison wrestled a close and confrontationial match and DarkBain has attacked him like a pitbull off a leash. Now they are choking him with a noose!
Lieberjosch: Not just choking... they're gonna hang him! And Osirus has no friends in the back! I knew a public execution would come of this!
Vinegar: Think again, doc! Someone has hit the ring to save... Is that?
Covert Jay: NUTCASE!
Lieberjosch: Wow, Jay learned a new word. And yes, it's "The Virus" Lucien Valentine. He's saved the Unholy Pope and he is knocking DarkBain around. Christ where he learn to box like that? That's "Sugar" Shane Mosley speed!
Covert Jay: Get with the times, Lieberjosch! Valentine is whooping DarkBain like he's Manny Pacquiao!
Vinegar: Forget refrences. Poison has left, with an evil glee in her eyes. And DarkBain is following her like a lost puppy. But Osirus is saved.. by Valentine!
Poison: 10
Osirus: 5