Synergy #36 Results - April 25nd, 2011

[Lord Hastings]

A light green Nissan pickup pulls into a parking space, and as the door opens, the one and only Pepper Phoenix, writer of the unofficial News and Rumours column, steps out. He looks around, and finally takes in the UGWC arena, breathing a deep breath. This was the big time.

As he goes to shut the door, a satisfied smirk on his face, he sees from the corner of his eye the former UGWC World Champion, Jet Somers, approaching at a brisk pace.

Jet: Alright, man, you ready for tonight?

Pepper: Did you get my footage?

Jet: Not this week, I haven't had time. Best for you to save it for the No Holds Barred column, though, right?

Pepper looks dubious, but Jet presses on, sliding a set of keys into Pepper's hand.

Jet: Remember, right at the end of the match, ok?

Pepper: I got it, I got it.

Jet nods and they begin to walk back to the arena together. Pepper turns to Jet and smirks.

Pepper: Alright, man, dish. Are you into Gabrielle?

Jet stops, giving Pepper a horrified look.

Jet: Are you on drugs? No, I am not into Gabrielle. And after tonight, it'll be funny to see who still is.

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: Just one week away from No Holds Barred, welcome to UGWC Synergy!

Covert Jay: Huttah!

Vinegar: There’s an absolutely blockbuster night of action just seven days away, but there’s a great card lined up for tonight as well.

Lieberjosch: And it’s going to begin with another match-up featuring the Dragon’s Cave!

“Haunted” begins to play, and Calypso Desmona crawls out from backstage. She stands and comes down the ramp to the ring.

Dennis: The follow contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, currently residing in Hartford, Connecticut, the Mistress of Pain, CALYPSO DESSSSSSSSSSMONAAA!!!!

Vinegar: Desmona will certainly be looking to rebound from her recent disappointing showing in a Fatal Fourway, won by Gabrielle Montgomery.

Lieberjosch: That’s because Gabby is heads and shoulders and D cups above any other woman in the industry, what chance did Calypso have when she also had to worry about amateurs like Jasmine and Sheena?

Dennis: And her opponent, already in the ring, from Tokyo, Japan, AKANE NAKAJIIIIMAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

Covert Jay: These Dragon Cavers certainly get the shaft with their entrances.

Lieberjosch: They have dues to pay.

Covert Jay: And bios to post.

Lieberjosch: Eh?

DING DING!!

Vinegar: Match underway, and-

“Chinchilla” hits, and Donovan Hastings emerges from backstage, his cloak flowing behind him.

Vinegar: Hastings out her already.

Lieberjosch: He’s just here to support Calypso.

Vinegar: In any case, it’s caught the eye of Nakajima, who has no doubt been warned to be cautious of the Lord of Pain.

Lieberjosch: She should pay attention to her opponent, as Calypso just about slaps the taste out of her mouth!

Vinegar: But Nakajima comes back with a flurry of kicks!

Covert Jay: Wow, those look like they’d make even Jet Somers jealous.

Vinegar: Desmona manages to whip Nakajima into the corner, but runs right into a reverse elbow.

Lieberjosch: And she bulldogs Calypso down!

Vinegar: Cover!




ONE!!!




TWO!!!




Vinegar: Desmona kicks out!

Lieberjosch: Hastings at ringside now, looks surprisingly calm.

Vinegar: Nakajima eyeing him carefully, taking a step back.

Covert Jay: She turns right into Calypso!

Lieberjosch: BEWITCHING!!!

Vinegar: A cover!




ONE!!!




TWO!!!




Vinegar: Nakajima kicks out!

Lieberjosch: It’s important to remember that while this is Nakajima’s first match in UGWC, she isn’t some bottom-feeding rookie from the Dragon’s Cave, she has had an impressive career overseas.

Vinegar: Desmona looks like she wants to finish her off! Lifting her up!

Lieberjosch: VOODOO!!!

Covert Jay: Ninjas out into a rollup!




ONE!!!




TWO!!!




THREE!!!!




Dennis: Here is your winner, AKANE NAKAJIMA!!!

Vinegar: What an upset!

Lieberjosch: I think Nakajima is about to be upset!

Vinegar: Hastings in the ring, knocks her down from behind

Lieberjosch: Calypso with a stomp to Nakajima!

Vinegar: No, he’s not going to do this!

Lieberjosch: Hastings puts her into the Hands of Fate!

Vinegar: Hastings has Akane Nakajima in the Hands of Fate, somebody has to stop this!

Covert Jay: PETERSON!!!!

Pbp: Chris Peterson in the ring, but Calypso warns Hastings, and the two of them bail out of the ring!

Lieberjosch: Peterson yelling at Hastings, but the Lord of Pain telling him, it’s not time yet!

Vinegar: But Chris Peterson will have a chance to prove himself, in just one week, at No Holds Barred!

[Lord Hastings]

Todd the Intern is walking backstage, fetching coffee for Ooley or something like that. He reaches the craft services table and sighs heavily as he starts to make the coffee.

Todd: “Man, they don’t pay me enough to do this…”

Kyle Tacker is walking on the way to the ring to get his match underway. He spots Todd however and walks over next to him. He rummages about all of the goodies about, making random conversation with Todd.

Kyle: ”So Todd is it? How goes it?”

Todd: “How do you think it would go if you worked for Ooley and Pierce… Always fetching coffee, getting berated for random crap, and the like.”

Kyle: ”Really? You work directly for the big boss?”

Todd: “Well… Yeah, I guess I do work for him.”

Kyle: ”Well then do you mind giving him a message for me?”

Todd shrugs his shoulders as he starts to stir the cream in the coffee.

Todd: “I don’t know, the don’t even listen to me anyway.”

Kyle begins to smile to himself as he grabs an apple and catches it after tossing it up in the air.

Kyle: ”Trust me, he will.”

Before Todd can say anything at all, Kyle slams the apple directly on Todd’s forehead. As Todd falls to the floor, dropping the coffee in the process, Kyle pulls out his brass knuckles and stands over him after Todd hits the ground with a thud.

Kyle: ”You tell that shithead Ooley that I want the Manicipal Massacre stip on my match. And don’t bullshit me by saying that it won’t be on the card. Comprenda?”

Todd just shakes his head up and down, Kyle smiles sadistically and delievers one punch to Todd’s head. Kyle then walks away heading for the ring while Todd still lays in the coffee rubbing his head.

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome back.

Lieberjosch: Those pop-up advertisements were enthralling, weren't they?

Covert Jay: Cynisim FTW!

Vinegar: We have Co-Operative action up for you next, between the HRD and two students of the Dragons Cave.

Lieberjosch: And much like its participant, Paul Cockatoo, it promises to be quite dull.

"Beds are Burning"

a Dijerido is heard playing in the arena as a shot of some kangaroos bounding off into the sunset is shown on the globotron before the opening Riff for "Beds are burning" by Midnight Oil takes over the P.A. system as "the original Aboriginal" makes his way down to the ring, smiling a big smile showing blindingly white teeth.

Dennis: The following Co-Op match is scheduled for ONE FALL! Introducing first, from the Torres Straight Islands, weighing in at 190lbs, PAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUL COOOOOOOOOOOCKAAAAAAATOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

as he walks down, he highfives a couple of fans, and if he can, manages to take a peek down some hot girls tops. he slides into the ring, and does an air drum solo to the drum solo of beds are burning, before flashing another smile to the crowd and awaiting his opponent.


Vinegar: Paul has been given a lot of oportunities as of late, can he capitalise on a match with half of the Co-Op champs involved?

Covert Jay: Nope, he's the new Medos. full of promise, but almost always delivering dissappointment.

"X gon' give it to ya"

Chris walks out onto the top of the ram. He raises his arms above his head, crossing them into an X, then pointing them out diagonally.

Dennis: From New York, weighing in at 230lbs, CHRIIIIIIIIIIIIIS PEEEEEEEEETEEEEEEEERSOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He strides down to the ring jogs up the ring steps and climbs in between the top and middle ropes

Vinegar: Yet again, a competitor who has a lot of promise, and has yet to live up to those expectations. Could tonight prove to be the night he gets his first win?

Lieberjosch: Doubt it...

"What you want"

'What You Want' slinks into existence as all the arena lighting turns purple and pink as what we want walks out atop the entrance way. The gorgeous Gabrielle in her hue of caramel smirks as she gazes out over all the UGWC fans and tussles her hair over her shoulders before sauntering down too the ring while holding her hands delicately aloft beside herself.

Dennis: From the Isle of Kiwis and Fush and Chups.....

Liberjosch: SHUT UP! We're trying to get a good look at Tits Magoo!!!

Covert Jay: Yeah!

Vinegar: Just let him do his work.....

Lieberjosch: Gay...

Dennis: Hey! Right here, buddy! This is GAAAAAAABRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEELEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When she reaches the ring she rests both hands on the ring apron and for a moment she suggestively arches her back before lifting herself up onto the apron where she sits with her legs dangling over the edge as she adjusts the neckline of her revealing sports bra ensuring it does what little it can to conceal her curves. She then crawls under the bottom rope and into the ring where she gets to her feet and leans back against the ropes where she turns and winks at the camera.

"Quick Death"

Duncan walks out onto the ramp and poses. He swaggers down to the ring slowly so everyone can admire him.

Dennis: From the UK, weighing in at 240lbs.......DUUUUUUNCAAAAAAAAAN RYDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!

When he reaches the ring he climbs in up the steps and onto a turnbuckle. He poses for a moment before jumping down.

Vinegar: Looks like it will be Ryder and Peterson who will start this one off. They lock up in the centre of the ring, before Peterson shifts Ryder into a side headlock. Ryder pushes Peterson off and he comes rebounding back with a solid shoulder block. Starting to eat your words, there, Doc?

Lieberjosch: It's early days, Nicholas....he'll show his greenish nature quite soon...

Vinegar: Peterson connects with a nice belly to belly suplex, and makes the tag to Paul Cockatoo, who goes immediately to the top rope, and connects with a hard diving elbow. Cockatoo pulls Ryder to his feet, and throws him into his corner, Cockatoo coming in with a running boot right as Gabby makes the blind tag. Ryder colapses, as Gabrielle makes her way into the ring, and instantly takes Paul down with a neckbreaker.

Lieberjosch: I saw Clevage.....you know what that means....

Covert Jay: UNDERCLEVAGE SHOT!!!!! Paul is a lucky man!

Vinegar: Gabby getting vicious with those stomps and don't say it Jay....

Covert Jay: Naughty baaaaaaad Ninja Girl!

Vinegar: Urgh....

Lieberjosch: Just as I predicted....Paul is getting his ass kicked! Gabby has just dropped her knee into his face, and there is a bit of blood coming out from his nose. Peterson cheating, however, and blindsides Gabby with a clothesline.

Vinegar: Effectively giving his partner a bit of breathing room there, as he makes his way slowly over to Peterson in the corner. Cockatoo makes it, and gets the tag. Peterson comes marching in, and locks a harsh ankle lock on Gabby's leg.

Lieberjosch: How uncivilised! Who would treat a lady like that??

Vinegar: Ryder putting a stop to that with a big boot to the head. Gabby gets up slowly, favouring that right foot a bit as she limps slightlyto the downed Peterson. She takes a small run up, before hitting a low drop kick to the face of Peterson as he gets up. Peterson getting back to his feet as Gabby comes in and locks in a side headlock. Peterson easily counters, however, planting Tits Magoo....

Covert Jay: o.O

Lieberjosch: What the....

Vinegar: If that doesn't stop the Gay rumours, then I'm out of ideas.....anyway, Chris plants Montgomery with a sidewalk slam. That last move, however, took a fair bit out of him as both lay down, recovering. Green starting to count here, as both start the crawl to their respective corners.

Covert Jay: Ah, the stable rush to the corner that comes with any tag style match...

Vinegar: It ends in a draw as both make the tag at the same time. Ryder rushes in, and accidentally takes out Green in the process, as Paul trips up over Greens legs...

Lieberjosch: Yeah, who didn't see that coming?

Vinegar: He recovers quickly, and hits Ryder with a HUGE back body drop over the ropes. Ryder gets up slowly as Cockatoo charges through....

Covert Jay: MAAAAAAAAAAAAAARBO!!!!!!!!!!

Vinegar: Paul slides the unconcious Ryder into the ring, and follows suit....

Lieberjosch: I could have been wrong about this ending....

Vinegar: Setting up.....

Covert Jay: FALL FROM ULARU!!!!!!!!!!

Lieberjosch: But the Ref is still out!

Vinegar: Paul realises this, and looks like hes going to set up for a second....

Covert Jay: THE BRITISH ARE COMING! THE BRITISH ARE COMING!

Vinegar: Paul hasnt seen Blake charge in with that chair! Blake spins Paul around and slmas the steel chair over his skull! causing him to crumple instantly! Blake looks over at the unconcious Ryder, and moths a certain profanity, before walking over and draping Ryders arm over Paul.

Lieberjosch: Still no referee......

Vinegar: Blake has fixed that problem, he's gone over to the unconcious Green, grabbed his arm and slammed it on the mat three times.....Its over!

DING! DING!

Dennis: Ladies and Gentlemen, your Winners........Duncan Ryder.....and GABRIELLE MONTGOMERY!!!!!!!!!!!

Lieberjosch: Wait....not that I'm complaining, but how can that be it? Sam didn't consciously call that match!

Covert Jay: They did it on WWE once, and if it's good enough for Vinnie.....it's good enough for us.

Vinegar: What an exciting cooperative match!

"Everybody Down"

Covert Jay: Ninja!

Vinegar: Up on the entrance ramp, a forklift parts the curtains, with Pepper Phoenix at the helm and Jet Somers standing on the forks, ring bell raised in his right hand!

Lieberjosch: Jet leaps off the forklift and speeds down to the ring as Pepper Phoenix maneauvers the forklift to block the entrance.

Covert Jay: Ninja slide into the ring!

Lieberjosch: Duncan and Gabrielle waste no time attacking The Wild Card with stomps.

Vinegar: But a confused looking Paul Cockatoo and Chris Peterson pull the Human Resource Department off the former world champ, and he's up like a jack in the box.

Lieberjosch: No!

Vinegar: Jet just laid out Duncan Ryder, and Gabrielle is next!

Lieberjosch: Paul and Chris backing off with hands raised, they want no part in this insanity.

Covert Jay: And Pepper has vanished. Ninja?

Vinegar: Jet reaches into the pocket of his shorts and pulls out a ziplock bag full of little items, what is he doing?

Lieberjosch: It looks like spray on tan, some clothing dye, and various other means of coloring.

Vinegar: And he goes to work on Gabrielle's face! Jet, no, this is abhorrent!

Covert Jay: It isn't long before Gabby's face looks like all the colors of the rainbow in one clown mask!

Vinegar: Is that silver nitrate? That stuff will stain for weeks!

Lieberjosch: And he's spraying so much of that tanning solution over the rest of her body, that beautiful caramel skin is going to turn orange!

Vinegar: The cavalry is here! The HRD is at the entrance, trying to get past the forklift!

Lieberjosch: Jet sliding out of the ring. Poor Gabby!

Vinegar: Crazy Opie digging around under the ring, and he comes out with two paint cans. What now?

Lieberjosch: Climbing back in, he pries the lid off one can, and begins stuffing Gabrielle's locks into the can! Duncan, wake up!

Covert Jay: Jet picks up a mic.

Jet: The beautiful face of the Human Resource Department, ladies and gentlemen. Now THAT is entertainment!

Vinegar: Did you hear that?

Covert Jay: It sounded like a wildebeest in pain!

Lieberjosch: Tyvola! The Jackal of Jwar Isle is barrelling down through the stands, shoving fans aside to get to the ring!

Vinegar: Jet scoops up the other paint can and pries the lid off as Tyvola leaps onto the apron.

Lieberjosch: Smack! He nails Tyvola with the open can of paint, and the bearded giant goes down, covered in black paint!

Vinegar: But the HRD has managed to push aside the forklift, and Johnny Blake, Robert Ooley, Boss P, and World Champion Travis Pierce rush down to the ring like an avalanche!

Lieberjosch: Jet's in trouble now. Wait, he turns toward the onslaught and just spreads his arms, accepting the attack as they pile into him!

Vinegar: Tyvola is back up!

Lieberjosch: He tears into the ring, tossing aside bodies to get at the Twisted Ninja!

Vinegar: As he finally clears Travis Pierce off, tossing him bodily into the corner, Jet gets to his feet, laughing hysterically.

Lieberjosch: Tyvola roars and unleashes a mammoth right hand that silences the crossdresser's laughter and knocks him down cold!

Vinegar: My god, there are bodies everywhere! What has Jet done?

Lieberjosch: Tyvola looks around, and finally makes his way over to his lover, trying to wipe the stains from her face and pulls her hair out of the paint.

Vinegar: An almost tragically bittersweet scene here as Tyvola scoops Gabrielle up, looks around, and roars in anger.

Lieberjosch: The number one contender carrying his love out of the ring and backstage, look at all this carnage only a week from No Holds Barred!

Vinegar: And the night has only just begun as half these men will meet again in the ring in our main event!!!

[Lord Hastings]

Covert Jay: And now onto the ‘hump’ match!

Leiberjosch: What? This isn’t that kind of show, pervert.

Covert Jay: That isn’t what I meant. Wednesday is the hump day during the week because it’s in the middle. This match is in the middle...

Leiberjosch: You’re an idiot.

Vinegar: Okaaaaaaaaaay. Now onto the match.

'How to Make a Monster'

Dennis: Introducing first, he is Natural Born Killer, N-B-KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!

NBK makes his way through the curtains and stalks down to the ring. He climbs into the ring and stands in the corner.

‘Violence Fetish’

Dennis: And his opponent, Kyle ‘RIOT’ TAAAAAAAAAAAAACKEEEEEERR!!

Kyle Tacker steps out from the back, his arms held high and his middle finger extended on both hands. He lowers his arms as he starts to walk down the ring, stopping halfway to flip the fans off some. He quickly climbs up the steel steps, and enters the ring through the second rope. He then stands in the center of the ring and raises his arms once more to flip the fans off again with both middle fingers.

Vinegar: This should be an intense encounter between two powerhouses.

The two men circle around the ring, eying each other. They charge in towards the center of the ring with a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Tacker gets the advantage and roughly pushes NBK back into the turnbuckle. The referee moves into break it up.Tacker backs up but gets nailed with a throat chop from NBK. He falls to one knee and swiftly gets kicked in the face.

Vinegar: NBK trying to take the early advantage in this match.

He grabs Tacker by the hair only to receive some punches to the gut. He tosses NBK back into the ropes and clotheslines over the top rope.

Covert Jay: Looks like he has some fire left in him.

NBK lands on his feet and immediately slides back into the ring. He ducks a clothesline from Tacker, bounces off the opposite side of the ropes and ducks his head for the Rumor Has It.

Vinegar: Going for RUMOR HAS IT!

Covert Jay: Ninja COUNTER!

Kyle reacts quickly and boots NBK in the face, knocking back toward the ropes. He falls through the ropes onto the apron and Tacker reaches over the top rope, pulling NBK to his feet. NBK lunges forward with a brutal headbutt. Tacker stumbles back, but NBK grabs his by his pants and pulls him back toward the ropes. He pushes Tackers head between the top and middle rope and drops him with a Double Underhook DDT onto the apron. His lifeless body slides from the ropes to the floor as NBK climbs back into the ring.

Vinegar: Oh my God..

Tacker isn’t moving on the outside of the referee begins the 10-count.

1.. 2.. 3..

4.. 5..

Tacker is slowly moving and is now trying to use the apron to get to his feet. NBK reaches through the ropes and pulls Tacker to the apron and into the ring. He shoves Kyle into the turnbuckle and steps backward away from the turnbuckle before charging in with a clothesline. Tacker sidesteps and shoves NBK chest-first into the turnbuckle before stepping behind him. NBK turns around and Kyle executes a Three-Point Clothesline and goes for the cover.

1..

2..

NBK kicks out and Kyle looks at the referee, checking for the count. He gets to his feet and drops a few kicks to the ribs of NBK before pulling him up and whipping him into the ropes. As NBK rebounds off, Kyle jumps into the air and catches NBK with a neckbreaker. He quickly gets back to his feet and stomps on NBK a bit more. Kyle moves to the corner, waiting for NBK to get back up. He begins to stir and slowly gets to his feet, turning toward Tacker. Kyle runs toward NBK with another clothesline but he gets scooped into a wicked Powerslam and he holds it for the cover.

1..

2..

Kyle kicks out and NBK transitions from the cover into a mount and begins bringing punches down on Kyle’s head. The ref attempts to get NBK to stop but gets thrown back and NBK begins bouncing Kyle’s head off of the mat. He stops and gets to his feet, slowly walking backwards, sort of stalking Kyle as he rolls to his stomach and gets on all fours. NBK kicks him in the ribs and drops an elbow to his torso as he rolls over. NBK pulls Kyle onto his knees and rains down more punches before stepping back and nailing him with a Clothesline. He rolls through and gets back to his feet. Kyle gets back to his feet. NBK grabs Tacker by the throat for his Throat Clutch Takedown, but Tacker his him with a few elbows and drops him with WIRED SHUT! He goes for the cover.

1..

2..

NBK kicks out and Tacker pulls him to his feet and quickly executes CHUCK IT, following it with another cover.

1..

2..

NBK kicks out again and Kyle sits on knees, catching his breath. NBK begins to stir and Kyle just punches him the face before getting back to his feet. He grabs NBK by the top of his mask and pulls him up to knee him in the gut. He plants NBK’s head between his legs before lifting him up for a powerbomb. He drops him hard but holds on, lifting him again..

Vinegar: Looks like he’s going for it, folks.

Covert Jay: Could be FIRE AT WILL!

Tacker drops with a 2nd powerbomb, holds on and brings him up again. As NBK is up top, he begins punching Tacker in the head and pushes off, landing on his feet in front of Kyle. He holds onto his hair on the way down, pushing Tacker’s head between his legs. NBK grabs him around the waist, lifts him up and drops down into a Cradle Piledriver, followed by the cover.

1..

2..

Tacker kicks out and NBK just rolls off with exhaustion. He gets to his feet, charges with Rumor Has It, but Tacker clocks him with the brass knucks! He covers!

1..

2..

3!

Dennis: Here is your winner, Kyle Tacker!

Vinegar: Tacker picks up the victory!

Covert Jay: And we've got plenty more to come!

[Lord Hastings]

John is seen backstage talking with someone out of view, and the sound is cut off.

Vinegar: “Well this is a surprise! John Russo is actually on an episode of Synergy!”

Liberjosch: “What’s he doing here?”

Covert Jay: “Probably looking for bunnies.”

Liberjosch: “Bunnies?”

The sound is finally fixed as John’s voice can now be heard loud and clearly.

John: ”So, all that I am asking for is to have the wedding on the pay-per-view. What do you say?”

The camera pans back to see Ooley leaning again Lois, rubbing his chin as he thinks.

Ooley: ”Now let me get this here straight, ya want Ole Bob here to take up a spot on the card for a wedding? I don’t think a wedding could help our buy-rates at all Rust.”

John: ”First off, it’s Russo. Second, what if I sweeten the deal.”

Ooley smiles deviously as he stands up straight and puts Lois over his shoulder.

Ooley: ”What do you mean by that Rust?”

John sighs at first, and then takes a big gulp of saliva.

John: ”If you allow this… I would be inclined to do a favor for you… Whether it be joining the HRD, making sure Pierce walks out of No Holds Barred champ, or anything like that.”

Ooley: ”So; basically Rust, your ass becomes Ole Bob’s then?”

John lowers his head for a moment before looking back at Ooley.

John: ”Yeah, if you put it that way… I guess my ass would be yours.”

Ooley: ”Consider it done there Rust. Oh, but Ole Bob has one condition.”

John: ”What?”

Ooley: ”Boss P is to preside over the ceremony.”

Ooley walks off carrying Lois and laughing at the same time, John just stands there and shakes his head.

John: ”Man, what the hell did I just do?”

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: We’re rolling on, just a week away from No Holds Barred!

Covert Jay: With some holds barred!

"Given to fly" by Pearl Jam hits as Enigma appears hanging from the rafters. As Eddie Vedder sings the line "He's flying", Enigma jumps off as if on cue and soars around the ring due to the fact that he is attached to a guy wire which allows him to gradually soar to a turnbuckle. As soon as he lands, he detaches the wire and allows it to ascend as he unhooks the title from his waist and holds it up for the crowd as cameras start going off everywhere. He then jumps down and rolls his neck before awaiting the start of the match.

Dennis: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, Down Under’s Best High Flyer, EEEEEEEEENIGMA!!!

Vinegar: In just one week Enigma will be in one of the biggest matches of his career as he challenges for the Cross-Hemisphere Championship, and we understand that will be a Bushfire Match!

Lieberjosch: And what better way to prepare for such a match than to face the reigning Chaos Champion!

The lights dim to a near blackout, as all you can see on the Titantron is the words: "He Is Here!" Suddenly, an explosion erupts from the stage as "Firefly" by Breaking Benjamin starts up. Medos appears just as the chorus starts. He walks to the front of the stage, looks around, raises one hand up slowly, then throws it down as yet another explosion appears from behind him. The screen is showing Medos wrestling with several other wrestlers from previous matches. Medos carries on walking down, he slaps hands with one fan, and walks past the others. He rolls into the ring, and towards an turnbuckle. He points at the fans, raises his hand to his forehead, sticks his index and middle finger out, and salutes the fans. He then prepares himself.

Dennis: And his opponent, he is the reigning Chaos Champion, the British Lionheart, MEEEEEEDOSSSS!!!

Vinegar: This match-up being fought under standard rules here tonight, we’re going to try to save the craziness for next week and No Holds Barred.

Covert Jay: Let’s see how well that works out.

DING DING!

Vinegar: Match underway, both men grappling for position in the middle of the ring, hammerlock applied by Medos.

Lieberjosch: Enigma reverses it, whips Medos off the ropes into a dropkick!

Vinegar: Enigma going right for the cover, Medos pushes him off. Both men right to their feet, Medos blocks a right hand, responds with a hard chop to the chest.

Lieberjosch: Medos hits the ropes, but Enigma leapfrogs over him into a somersault.

Covert Jay: FIRELIGHTER!!!

Vinegar: Medos dropped to his knees by that kick there.

Lieberjosch: And now Enigma plants him with a DDT!

Vinegar: A cover!




ONE!!!




TWO!!!




Vinegar: Medos kicks out!

Lieberjosch: Hot start by Enigma.

Covert Jay: And it’ll BE hot for him next week, in that Bushfire Match!

Vinegar: Any insight into what that match might be?

Covert Jay: There are bushes planted around the ring, and the first person to light them all on fire wins.

Vinegar: Stop it.

Lieberjosch: It was JK’s signature match when he was still trolling around in the minor leagues on the independent circuit, so The Cyclone will certainly have an advantage as he attempts to defend his championship.

Vinegar: Meanwhile both Enigma and Medos are back to their feet, Enigma charging.

Covert Jay: TRANSATLANTIC TROUBLE!

Vinegar: Medos knocks him down with that jumping corkscrew kick, both men down now.

Lieberjosch: This is a turning point in this match, the first man to his feet will have a distinct advantage.

Vinegar: And it is Medos who is first it, has Enigma in a gutwrench.

Lieberjosch: Enigma pulls the legs out from underneath, pivots and catapults Medos face first into the turnbuckle!

Vinegar: Medos staggers out, recovers in time to duck a clothesline!

Covert Jay: TANABATA!!!

Vinegar: And now Medos sets up for the Swift Boot! He waits as Enigma stirs, goes for it!

Lieberjosch: Enigma dodges!

Vinegar: Medos whiffs on the kick, Enigma steps behind him!

Covert Jay: THUNDER CHILD!!!

Vinegar: But Medos floats off!

Covert Jay: FALLING FUTURE!!

Vinegar: Medos with the cover!




ONE!!!




TWO!!!




THREE!!!!!




Dennis: Here is your winner, MEEEEEDOOOOSSSS!!!!

Vinegar: Medos comes away with the victory, carrying on his momentum towards No Holds Barred, but how will he fare in his first title defense, against Kyle Tacker?

Lieberjosch: Looks like we’re getting a preview!

Vinegar: Tacker’s in the ring!!! Where did he come from?

Lieberjosch: Medos doesn’t see him!

Covert Jay: He’s got the knucks!

Vinegar: AND TACKER DRILLS MEDOS IN THE FACE WITH THOSE BRASS KNUCKLES!!!

Lieberjosch: Kyle Tacker has made a statement here tonight, he is coming for that championship!

Vinegar: Now what is Enigma doing?

Covert Jay: He’s setting up a table at ringside.

Vinegar: I can see that, but why HOLY HOPSCOTCH!!!!

Lieberjosch: Enigma just set the table on fire!

Covert Jay: The Saint of Chaos is unveiled!

Vinegar: Enigma rolls into the ring, Medos stumbling up, he has no idea where he is at, Enigma, don’t do this!

Lieberjosch: He’s gonna do it!

Covert Jay: SCRIPTURES OF CHAOS!!!!!!!!!!!

Vinegar: Enigma just speared Medos through the ropes, through that flaming table!

Covert Jay: It was St. Jimmy!

Vinegar: But what persona of Enigma’s will we see, when he faces The Cyclone and Ezekiel Pax for the Cross-Hemisphere Title, in a Bushfire Match!

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: It seems we already have all our competitors in the ring for the Main Event.

Covert Jay: What a genuine surprise that is in a 6 man Cooperative match, I can't imagine why such a move could have been made. I just hope that people will be able to live without some meaningless space filling conversation and generic summaries of the past few weeks actions. I trust everyone knows what's going on.

Vinegar: It might be worth running through the competitors in case people have forgotten. Firstly we have the World Heavyweight Champion, Travis Pierce, alongside the Cross-Hemisphere Champion, JK.

Lieberjosch: Then we have Pierce's opponent at No Holds Barred, the almost unstoppable Tyvola, teaming with the almost decipherable Phrixus Deimos.

Covert Jay: And then we have jet Somers and Ezekiel, jeez guys, what happened to keeping this short and snappy, I thought we agreed whilst the buffering was going on.

Vinegar: Oh yeah, apparently he has a date to catch...

Covert Jay: A catch to date is more accurate.

Lieberjosch: You have a date? Impossible.

Covert Jay: It's amazing how everyone is just patiently waiting for you to finish discussing the love life of a Ninja.

Lieberjosch: it is?

Covert Jay: Not really, you're just lucky that Phrixus and Tyvola couldn't decide who would line up against JK, the need for someone to step in and mediate has bought you some time, but I'm pretty sure Fear is starting, as is jet Somers...

Vinegar: This should be interesting, there is a lot of history already in that ring. It's almost like every combination has a story behind it.

Covert Jay: Fear quickly whips JK into Jet Somers who grabs him and executes a quick belly-to-belly suplex, only for Phrixus to shoulde rbarge him to the floor.

Lieberjosch: Deimos now stomping on Jet as JK gets to his feet, but is distracted as Ezekiel reaches out and smacks him in the back of the head, allowing Phrixus to execute a Russian leg Sweep.

Vinegar: Jet is on his feet, and he turns Fear to face him, locks up and then takes him down into a modified cross-faced chicken wing.

Lieberjosch: Fear manages to reach the ropes as Jet gets to his feet, just in time for JK to dropkick him and he goes tumbling out of the ring to the outside...

Covert Jay: Zeke sees his partner crash to the floor and he climbs to the top rope behind the ref's back, and then leaps off, hitting a turning JK with a top rope spear, and then begins pounding on him as the ref tries to separate them and get him from the ring.

Vinegar: Whilst Burke is preoccupied Pierce drops to the arena floor, and grabs his World Title belt and stalks up on the rising Jet Somers, brings the belt backwards...

Lieberjosch: But Tyvola seems to think Jet took enough of a beating earlier tonight and grabs the World Title from Pierce, and then manhandles Pierce slamming his back into the steel ring post.

Vinegar: jet climbs to his feet, but that fall from the ring, alongside the beating he almost inflicted on himself earlier are taking their toll, he is unsteady on his feet...

Lieberjosch: Yet he charges at Tyvola like a fool...

Covert Jay: The fool manages to send Tyvola flipping over backwards, as he trips on the downed body of Travis Pierce...

Vinegar: Glenn Burke has lost control of this one it seems, as in the ring Ezekiel and JK continue to try and exchange blows, and Phrixus Deimos has taken up the role Burke was attending to earlier, and is trying to convince Ezekiel to leave the ring, whilst Burke hollers at the three men outside the ring.

Covert Jay: Phrixus clearly getting annoyed with his newly found position, and after a few moments of attempting to convince the two men, who are trading rights and lefts in the centre of the ring, he decides instead to run the tropes and takes both men down with a double bulldog...

Vinegar: He then turns and looks at Jet who is advancing on Tyvola as he gets to his feet...

Covert Jay: Suicide Dive!

Vinegar: And Jet manages to move, sending Fear crashing into his own partner, and now Somers turns towards Travis Pierce who is trying to climb back into the ring, he smiles and grabs the World Heavyweight Champion...

Covert Jay: only for Gabrielle to appear as if from nowhere and slam the heel of a very nice show into the back of Jet's head, sending him to the floor...and in turn sending Burke to call for the bell....

Dennis: Ladies and Gentlemen your winners via Disqualification, JJJJJJEEEEEETTTTTTTT SOOOOOMMMMEEEERRRRSSS AAAAANNNNDDDD EEEEEZZZZZEEEEKKKKIIIIIEEELLL!!!

Vinegar: I don't think Burke had much choice but to end the match there, considering the chaos that has ensued, and no sooner does the bell ring than Enigma and the TVHS can be seen emerging from the back and rushing the ring. Enigma slides into the ring as Ezekiel gets to his feet, and takes him down with a lead pipe to the guts...and throws him from the ring....

Covert Jay: The TVHS run towards Tyvola and Phrixus, Duncan Ryder and Deimos spill over the barricade and into the crowd, exchanging blows...And Duncan grabs a chair from a displaced fan and slams it over the head of Fear...

Lieberjosch: Johnny Blake is not so lucky and Tyvola has managed to grab him by the throat....and slams him onto the floor...

Vinegar: Gabby with her hair still matted with paint, is on top of Jet Somers, taking her frustrations out on him, and he looks blissfully unaware what's going on.

Covert Jay: In short ladies and gentlemen, this has turned into a complete clustercensored, no clear winners or loser, just chaos and destruction, pain and suffering, and the hyping of a future event. What did you expect from a 6 man Cooperative a week out from No Holds Barred? A friggin' masterpiece?

[Lord Hastings]

Prologue
Ichabod

Opener
Hastings

Tacker's Demand
John

Cooperative Match
JK (post-match by Ichy)

NBK vs Tacker
Ezekiel

Enigma vs Medos
Hastings

Main Event
T-Rob

[Jet Somers]

Brilliant.

I'll take the blame for the burp at of Blake coming out with HRD after already been out. Didn't know! lol, it happens.

[Sheena Ramone]

Jays reaction to Blake running down was awesome!

Great show, the Tacker match lost a little momentum as we all knew who would win, but I blame that more on NBK no-showing. The main event was a bit 'wtf' ish, but with that many people, it is understandable.

looking forward to the PPV, You guys are gonna love the Bushfire match xD.

[Orgabsmic]

Good show this week guys...quite the attack on Gabby there from Jet, very creative.

[EZRA]

Nice show to lead into the PPV. Can't say much besides that. Nearly every match was pinpointed and helped set up to NHB.

[Jet Somers]

Can't wait to see Gabby's reaction to the stip after this attack

[Orgabsmic]

Boss P presiding over a wedding...uh oh