Post by brandonbrown on Jul 25, 2009 21:56:54 GMT -5
Halloween 12:00 A.M.
(The scene starts outside the hospital where GIW Superstar Brandon Brown is staying. A Young nurse is making her way home.)
Nurse Girl: I can’t wait to get home and fuck my boyfriend at this late hour. I’m also going to do some drugs. I don’t know why they let me be a nurse. Wait. I remember now. It’s because I’m so hot.
(Nurse Girl gets into her car. In case you are wondering, I was too lazy to actually give her a name. She tries to start her car.)
Nurse Girl: My car won’t start. That’s a bummer.
(A shadowy figure approaches the car.)
Nurse Girl: I see someone. Maybe they will help me start my car. He even has a mask on. He’s in the spirit of Halloween. He’s also probably good in bed.
(Nurse Girl gets out of her car and calls the shadowy figure over.)
Nurse Girl: I need your help. My car won’t start. I have tools in my trunk if that will work. I know nothing about cars but tools seem like the right thing to use.
(She pops the trunk open and the shadowy figure walks over and grabs a tool.)
Nurse Girl: Is that a sledgehammer? What do you need one of them for? How good are you at fixing cars?
(The Shadowy figure smacks the stupid bitch over the head with the sledgehammer over and over again until she dies.)
Shadow: I am that damn good.
Halloween 4 P.M.
(Big B is seen heading into Brandon’s room.)
Big B: Are you allowed to step out of this room yet?
Brandon: I’m still forbidden. I didn’t do it. It was that Nic Cage bastard. Hopefully I will be out of here soon though.
Big B: We can only hope. That way you can get back into the ring.
Brandon: Yeah. I heard they made some four man Hell in a Cell Match at Horizons. Is that true?
Big B: Yeah. Boolz, Kiseragi, Roberts, and Prescott are all in the match.
Brandon: That figures. Prescott put himself in the main event. What a fucking douche. When I get my hands on him, I’m going to kill him. I’ll shoot him with a rocket launcher.
Big B: Good luck on that one.
Brandon: I heard you got beat by Hastings last week. Is that true?
Big B: He hit me with a chair.
Brandon: That’s a poor excuse. I’ve been hit with much worse things than chairs and I still won. Maybe you should just quit wrestling. It just might not be your calling.
Big B: It is to my calling. I will prove it when I win my fatal four way match this week.
Brandon: Who are your opponents?
Big B: Solomon, Crimson Ghost, and Raenius are my opponents.
Brandon: You’re going to lose for sure. Those guys are much better than you. They will kill you in that ring.
?: Who is killing?
Brandon: Nobody is killing, Nurse Larry.
Nurse Larry: You must not have heard the news yet. Which is weird considering you are staying in the hospital.
Brandon: They don’t let me out or watch television.
Nurse Larry: Last night one of our nurses was brutally murdered.
Brandon: Which one?
Nurse Larry: The hot slut.
Brandon: I liked her.
Big B: Me too.
Nurse Larry: They also found a few more bodies near here. Nobody wants to find this killer though because of his brutal style of killings.
Brandon: It sounds scary but it also sounds like a groovy mystery. Big B. Get out your cell phone.
Halloween 7 P.M.
Shaggy: Like Zoinks, it’s good to see you guys again.
Scooby: Rit’s Real Rood.
Brandon: Thanks guys. Now, we have a mystery to solve. There is a killer on the loose and we must stop him.
Scooby: Riller!
(Scooby jumps on Shaggy.)
Shaggy: You never said anything about a killer.
Big B: You wouldn’t have came then. That’s why I lied and said we were inviting you for pizza.
Shaggy: Are you telling me there is no pizza?
Big B: None.
Scobby: Roh Ran.
Brandon: Actually, I ordered pizza because I was hungry. So there is pizza. He should be here in two minutes.
Halloween 7:02 P.M.
Pizza Guy: Did you guys order the pizza?
Brandon: Yes. We did.
Halloween 7:07 P.M.
(The Pizza Guy is on his little pizza bike.)
Pizza Guy: Those guys sure ordered a lot of pizza. I also have five more deliveries to do. It’s a good thing this bike can carry a lot of pizza. I just want to know if my day can get any worse.
Shadow: It can.
(Shadow takes a pizza cutter and slit’s the Pizza Guy’s throat. Shadow then looks the blood off the cutter.)
Shadow: This tastes better than pizza sauce.
Halloween 10 P.M.
Big B: It took us three hours to eat this pizza and I’m still not full.
Shaggy: Like me neither.
Scooby: Ri’m rot rull.
Brandon: We should probably start our hunt for the killer.
Shaggy: In the dark. Look how dark it is out there.
Scooby: Rery rark.
Brandon: That’s okay. We have flashlights.
(Brandon pulls out flashlights.)
Brandon: Don’t ask how I got these.
Shaggy: I’m too afraid still.
Brandon: We can’t just stay in here. Some sick freak could walk in the door any second.
(Nicolas Cage walks through the door.)
Brandon: You see what I mean.
Nicolas Cage: Where is my treasure, Brandon?
Big B: How many times does Brandon have to tell you that there is not more treasure to be found?
Nicolas Cage: A googolplex.
Brandon: I’ll handle this, Big B. You want some treasure. If you help us find this killer that has been on the loose then I will let you have some treasure. Are we clear?
Nicolas Cage: We are clear.
10:05 P.M.
Big B: It’s dark out here.
Brandon: Turn your flashlight on, dip shit.
Big B: I forgot I had one.
Brandon: This is why you don’t win matches.
Big B: Shut up.
Nicolas Cage: This killer isn’t going to know what hit him when he gets into a Nicolas Cage Match.
Shaggy: Scoob, how do we get into these situations?
Scooby: Ri ron’t rnow Raggy.
Brandon: We’re going to have to split up gang. Luckily, I know none of us will die. We are main characters. Any poor sap you meet on the way is probably fucked though. Do you understand?
Big B: I’m a main character right.
Brandon: You are but you are also black. You might not survive. You better be hoping another black guy comes around to save you. Scooby and Shaggy, you two go over there. I’ hang with Big B and Cage. There is a thirty percent chance that Cage is the killer so I’m sticking with him.
Nicolas Cage: I thought I would be a higher percent than that.
(The gang splits up.)
Shaggy: It’s spooky out here.
Scooby: Reah. Rooky.
?: Who are you motherfuckers?
Shaggy: Samuel L. Jackson.
Samuel L. Jackson: That’s right motherfucker. I’m Samuel L. Jackson. Did I make myself clear?
Scobby: Rou’re rot Ramuel.
Shaggy: That’s a mask.
Samuel L. Jackson: It’s Halloween. Everybody has a mask.
(A machete goes right through the guy with a Samuel L. Jackson mask on.)
Samuel L. Jackson: Motherfucker.
(He dies.)
Shadow: Oh, I’m sorry. Did I break your concentration?
Scooby and Shaggy: RUN!
(Scooby Doo music plays as the killer chases him. Meanwhile, we cut back to the Browns and Cage.)
Nicolas Cage: How much longer until we get the treasure?
Brandon: It depends how long it takes for you to find the killer.
?: Is that Nicolas Cage?
(A man dresses as Ghost Rider starts bowing down to Nicolas Cage.)
Ghost Rider: You are a God.
Nicolas Cage: Do you know where the treasure is?
Ghost Rider: I’ve been waiting for this day my whole life. I’ve finally met my idol.
Brandon: Cage’s fans are bigger nut jobs than him.
Nicolas Cage: I heard that.
Big B: Ghost Rider dude. Get a life. Your life shouldn’t revolve around Nicolas Cage: He’s fucking crazy.
Ghost Rider: So am I?
(The Ghost Rider guy takes off his costume and he looks exactly like Nicolas Cage.)
Nicolas Cage: I have a twin.
Ghost Rider: No. I went on one of those shows where they make you look like a celebrity.
Brandon: Lame.
Ghost Rider: You’re lame. Cage is an acting God.
Big B: If God was retarded.
Ghost Rider: You take that back. I’m a true fan. I haven’t been spelling Nic Cage’s name wrong in every one of my RPs.
Brandon: It’s an alternate spelling besides I have corrected it for my latest one. Besides, you are about to die.
Ghost Rider: Why do you say that?
Brandon: The killer is right behind you and he has an axe.
(Shadow chops Ghost Rider’s head off.)
Shadow: Cage, how did you win an Academy Award?
Nicolas Cage: That’s it. I’m going to kill you.
Shadow: I still have an axe.
Cage and Browns: RUN!
(Over time The Gang runs into each other.)
Shaggy: Like no more. I’m freaking out.
Scooby: Ro rore.
Brandon: We need you guys. We have to stop this killer.
Scooby: Re Ran’t.
Brandon: Would you guys do it for a Scooby Snack?
Scooby: Rooby Rack.
Brandon: Yes. A Scooby Snack.
Scooby: Rokay.
(Brandon gives Scooby and Shaggy some Scooby Snacks.(
Shaggy: I’m pumped now.
Scooby: Re roo.
Big B: Now we have to set a trap.
(The Gang sets a trap and they hide.)
Brandon: There’s the killer. He heading for the trap.
Shadow: What is this? Pull this if you want to kill somebody. I want to kill somebody.
(Scooby sneezes.)
Shadow: Wait a minute. This is a trap. I’ll get you, Scooby.
(Shadow chases Scooby around in circles..)
Shadow: I will cut you up with my machete.
(Scooby runs over by the trap and Shadow runs right after him. Shadow attempts to cut Scooby but he misses.)
Shaggy: I’ll save you.
(Shaggy runs in but he gets stabbed in the leg.)
Shaggy: Not cool.
(Brandon uses this distraction to Superkick Shadow and Brandon pulls the lever allowing the trap to take place. A big net falls on Shadow.)
Big B: Yeah. We got him.
(They all gather around the killer.)
Brandon: Let’s find out who this really is.
(Brandon removes the mask.)
All: NURSE LARRY!!!
Nurse Larry: I would have gotten away with it too if it weren’t for you meddling kids.
(Nicolas Cage runs up and beheads Nurse Larry with a machete.)
Nicolas Cage: I deserved my Academy Award. I want my treasure now.
Brandon: Good Grief.
(The Peanuts Music plays as the scene fades to black.)
(The scene starts outside the hospital where GIW Superstar Brandon Brown is staying. A Young nurse is making her way home.)
Nurse Girl: I can’t wait to get home and fuck my boyfriend at this late hour. I’m also going to do some drugs. I don’t know why they let me be a nurse. Wait. I remember now. It’s because I’m so hot.
(Nurse Girl gets into her car. In case you are wondering, I was too lazy to actually give her a name. She tries to start her car.)
Nurse Girl: My car won’t start. That’s a bummer.
(A shadowy figure approaches the car.)
Nurse Girl: I see someone. Maybe they will help me start my car. He even has a mask on. He’s in the spirit of Halloween. He’s also probably good in bed.
(Nurse Girl gets out of her car and calls the shadowy figure over.)
Nurse Girl: I need your help. My car won’t start. I have tools in my trunk if that will work. I know nothing about cars but tools seem like the right thing to use.
(She pops the trunk open and the shadowy figure walks over and grabs a tool.)
Nurse Girl: Is that a sledgehammer? What do you need one of them for? How good are you at fixing cars?
(The Shadowy figure smacks the stupid bitch over the head with the sledgehammer over and over again until she dies.)
Shadow: I am that damn good.
Halloween 4 P.M.
(Big B is seen heading into Brandon’s room.)
Big B: Are you allowed to step out of this room yet?
Brandon: I’m still forbidden. I didn’t do it. It was that Nic Cage bastard. Hopefully I will be out of here soon though.
Big B: We can only hope. That way you can get back into the ring.
Brandon: Yeah. I heard they made some four man Hell in a Cell Match at Horizons. Is that true?
Big B: Yeah. Boolz, Kiseragi, Roberts, and Prescott are all in the match.
Brandon: That figures. Prescott put himself in the main event. What a fucking douche. When I get my hands on him, I’m going to kill him. I’ll shoot him with a rocket launcher.
Big B: Good luck on that one.
Brandon: I heard you got beat by Hastings last week. Is that true?
Big B: He hit me with a chair.
Brandon: That’s a poor excuse. I’ve been hit with much worse things than chairs and I still won. Maybe you should just quit wrestling. It just might not be your calling.
Big B: It is to my calling. I will prove it when I win my fatal four way match this week.
Brandon: Who are your opponents?
Big B: Solomon, Crimson Ghost, and Raenius are my opponents.
Brandon: You’re going to lose for sure. Those guys are much better than you. They will kill you in that ring.
?: Who is killing?
Brandon: Nobody is killing, Nurse Larry.
Nurse Larry: You must not have heard the news yet. Which is weird considering you are staying in the hospital.
Brandon: They don’t let me out or watch television.
Nurse Larry: Last night one of our nurses was brutally murdered.
Brandon: Which one?
Nurse Larry: The hot slut.
Brandon: I liked her.
Big B: Me too.
Nurse Larry: They also found a few more bodies near here. Nobody wants to find this killer though because of his brutal style of killings.
Brandon: It sounds scary but it also sounds like a groovy mystery. Big B. Get out your cell phone.
Halloween 7 P.M.
Shaggy: Like Zoinks, it’s good to see you guys again.
Scooby: Rit’s Real Rood.
Brandon: Thanks guys. Now, we have a mystery to solve. There is a killer on the loose and we must stop him.
Scooby: Riller!
(Scooby jumps on Shaggy.)
Shaggy: You never said anything about a killer.
Big B: You wouldn’t have came then. That’s why I lied and said we were inviting you for pizza.
Shaggy: Are you telling me there is no pizza?
Big B: None.
Scobby: Roh Ran.
Brandon: Actually, I ordered pizza because I was hungry. So there is pizza. He should be here in two minutes.
Halloween 7:02 P.M.
Pizza Guy: Did you guys order the pizza?
Brandon: Yes. We did.
Halloween 7:07 P.M.
(The Pizza Guy is on his little pizza bike.)
Pizza Guy: Those guys sure ordered a lot of pizza. I also have five more deliveries to do. It’s a good thing this bike can carry a lot of pizza. I just want to know if my day can get any worse.
Shadow: It can.
(Shadow takes a pizza cutter and slit’s the Pizza Guy’s throat. Shadow then looks the blood off the cutter.)
Shadow: This tastes better than pizza sauce.
Halloween 10 P.M.
Big B: It took us three hours to eat this pizza and I’m still not full.
Shaggy: Like me neither.
Scooby: Ri’m rot rull.
Brandon: We should probably start our hunt for the killer.
Shaggy: In the dark. Look how dark it is out there.
Scooby: Rery rark.
Brandon: That’s okay. We have flashlights.
(Brandon pulls out flashlights.)
Brandon: Don’t ask how I got these.
Shaggy: I’m too afraid still.
Brandon: We can’t just stay in here. Some sick freak could walk in the door any second.
(Nicolas Cage walks through the door.)
Brandon: You see what I mean.
Nicolas Cage: Where is my treasure, Brandon?
Big B: How many times does Brandon have to tell you that there is not more treasure to be found?
Nicolas Cage: A googolplex.
Brandon: I’ll handle this, Big B. You want some treasure. If you help us find this killer that has been on the loose then I will let you have some treasure. Are we clear?
Nicolas Cage: We are clear.
10:05 P.M.
Big B: It’s dark out here.
Brandon: Turn your flashlight on, dip shit.
Big B: I forgot I had one.
Brandon: This is why you don’t win matches.
Big B: Shut up.
Nicolas Cage: This killer isn’t going to know what hit him when he gets into a Nicolas Cage Match.
Shaggy: Scoob, how do we get into these situations?
Scooby: Ri ron’t rnow Raggy.
Brandon: We’re going to have to split up gang. Luckily, I know none of us will die. We are main characters. Any poor sap you meet on the way is probably fucked though. Do you understand?
Big B: I’m a main character right.
Brandon: You are but you are also black. You might not survive. You better be hoping another black guy comes around to save you. Scooby and Shaggy, you two go over there. I’ hang with Big B and Cage. There is a thirty percent chance that Cage is the killer so I’m sticking with him.
Nicolas Cage: I thought I would be a higher percent than that.
(The gang splits up.)
Shaggy: It’s spooky out here.
Scooby: Reah. Rooky.
?: Who are you motherfuckers?
Shaggy: Samuel L. Jackson.
Samuel L. Jackson: That’s right motherfucker. I’m Samuel L. Jackson. Did I make myself clear?
Scobby: Rou’re rot Ramuel.
Shaggy: That’s a mask.
Samuel L. Jackson: It’s Halloween. Everybody has a mask.
(A machete goes right through the guy with a Samuel L. Jackson mask on.)
Samuel L. Jackson: Motherfucker.
(He dies.)
Shadow: Oh, I’m sorry. Did I break your concentration?
Scooby and Shaggy: RUN!
(Scooby Doo music plays as the killer chases him. Meanwhile, we cut back to the Browns and Cage.)
Nicolas Cage: How much longer until we get the treasure?
Brandon: It depends how long it takes for you to find the killer.
?: Is that Nicolas Cage?
(A man dresses as Ghost Rider starts bowing down to Nicolas Cage.)
Ghost Rider: You are a God.
Nicolas Cage: Do you know where the treasure is?
Ghost Rider: I’ve been waiting for this day my whole life. I’ve finally met my idol.
Brandon: Cage’s fans are bigger nut jobs than him.
Nicolas Cage: I heard that.
Big B: Ghost Rider dude. Get a life. Your life shouldn’t revolve around Nicolas Cage: He’s fucking crazy.
Ghost Rider: So am I?
(The Ghost Rider guy takes off his costume and he looks exactly like Nicolas Cage.)
Nicolas Cage: I have a twin.
Ghost Rider: No. I went on one of those shows where they make you look like a celebrity.
Brandon: Lame.
Ghost Rider: You’re lame. Cage is an acting God.
Big B: If God was retarded.
Ghost Rider: You take that back. I’m a true fan. I haven’t been spelling Nic Cage’s name wrong in every one of my RPs.
Brandon: It’s an alternate spelling besides I have corrected it for my latest one. Besides, you are about to die.
Ghost Rider: Why do you say that?
Brandon: The killer is right behind you and he has an axe.
(Shadow chops Ghost Rider’s head off.)
Shadow: Cage, how did you win an Academy Award?
Nicolas Cage: That’s it. I’m going to kill you.
Shadow: I still have an axe.
Cage and Browns: RUN!
(Over time The Gang runs into each other.)
Shaggy: Like no more. I’m freaking out.
Scooby: Ro rore.
Brandon: We need you guys. We have to stop this killer.
Scooby: Re Ran’t.
Brandon: Would you guys do it for a Scooby Snack?
Scooby: Rooby Rack.
Brandon: Yes. A Scooby Snack.
Scooby: Rokay.
(Brandon gives Scooby and Shaggy some Scooby Snacks.(
Shaggy: I’m pumped now.
Scooby: Re roo.
Big B: Now we have to set a trap.
(The Gang sets a trap and they hide.)
Brandon: There’s the killer. He heading for the trap.
Shadow: What is this? Pull this if you want to kill somebody. I want to kill somebody.
(Scooby sneezes.)
Shadow: Wait a minute. This is a trap. I’ll get you, Scooby.
(Shadow chases Scooby around in circles..)
Shadow: I will cut you up with my machete.
(Scooby runs over by the trap and Shadow runs right after him. Shadow attempts to cut Scooby but he misses.)
Shaggy: I’ll save you.
(Shaggy runs in but he gets stabbed in the leg.)
Shaggy: Not cool.
(Brandon uses this distraction to Superkick Shadow and Brandon pulls the lever allowing the trap to take place. A big net falls on Shadow.)
Big B: Yeah. We got him.
(They all gather around the killer.)
Brandon: Let’s find out who this really is.
(Brandon removes the mask.)
All: NURSE LARRY!!!
Nurse Larry: I would have gotten away with it too if it weren’t for you meddling kids.
(Nicolas Cage runs up and beheads Nurse Larry with a machete.)
Nicolas Cage: I deserved my Academy Award. I want my treasure now.
Brandon: Good Grief.
(The Peanuts Music plays as the scene fades to black.)