Post by brandonbrown on Jul 25, 2009 22:00:24 GMT -5
It’s time to find some treasure.
Brandon: You have got to be fucking kidding me.
(The demented figure shows himself to be Nic Cage.)
Nic Cage: Nice place you got here. I can’t believe you two thought you could get away from me.
Brandon: Do you have tracking devices on us or something?
Nic Cage: I do but I’m not going to tell you where. Now are you four going to help me find my treasure or not.
Declan: Get this guy out of here.
Cara: Isn’t that Nic Cage? We can’t disrespect a celebrity like him.
Big B: Brandon, they’re speaking in script form now.
Brandon: Shut up. I’m listening to their conversation.
Cara: Declan. I want to go look for treasure with him. I want to talk to him.
(Cara walks over to Nic Cage.)
Cara: I can’t believe Nic Cage is standing right in front of me.
Nic Cage: I knew this day would come. Your mother and I was only a one time thing. I didn’t know she would get pregnant. I am finally happy to meet my daughter though. Give your dad a hug.
Cara: I’m not your daughter.
Nic Cage: You’re not? Oh, of course you aren’t. I was just messing with you. I’m a bit of a jokester.
Brandon: Your career is a joke.
Nic Cage: Tell that to my Academy Award
Cara: You have an Academy Award?
Nic Cage: Why yes I do.
(Nic Cage pulls his Academy Award.)
Nic Cage: She’s a beauty.
Brandon: Do you take that with you everywhere?
Nic Cage: Why wouldn’t I?
Brandon: With you, I’m not even going to ask.
Nic Cage: Whatever. Can we look for treasure now?
Cara: Yes. I want to look for treasure with a real celebrity.
Declan: We’re not going with these idiots to look for treasure.
Nic Cage: You’ll help me though?
Declan:…
Cara: Please. I really want to go. You must not love me anymore.
Declan: That’s not fair. Fine. We’ll go treasure hunting with these morons.
Nic Cage: I can come too. It was my idea.
Declan:…
Cara: I’m going treasure hunting with a celebrity.
Declan: Where is this supposed treasure?
Nic Cage: It’s not too far from here. There is a cave where the treasure is buried.
Declan: How do you know this?
Nic Cage: Barack Obama told me.
(Declan, Cara, and Nic Cage head out the door while Brandon and Big B stay inside to discuss something.)
Brandon: I’m big on conspiracy theories. What if Declan and Cage are setting us up? What if Prescott really does want to train for our match so he’s trying to set something up to get rid of us?
Big B: I don’t know but we should follow them.
Brandon: You’re right. I wish Cage would have chosen a different day to treasure hunt. Does he not realize how bad this storm is?
(Brandon and Big B head outside and they follow the other three.)
Cara: Declan, I’m cold. Hold on to me.
Declan: Anything to please you.
Brandon: Get a room.
Declan: As always, you are just jealous that you don’t have what I have.
Big B: Burn.
Brandon: Nobody asked your fat ass. Cara. Do you have any sisters that are as hot as you?
Cara: I’m not telling you anything about my family.
Brandon: I just want to know.
Declan: Drop it.
Brandon: Come on Declan. If she has a sister, then maybe we could hook up. I could be like your brother-in-law then. We’d be the greatest wrestling family in wrestling.
Big B: The greatest wrestling family in wrestling?
Brandon: That was the best way I could put it.
Declan: I hate the thought of having to be related to you. That’s just disgusting.
Brandon: If you think I’m disgusting, you would be also related to this tubby dumbass over here.
Big B: Hey.
Cara: Can you men be quiet? I want to help Nic Cage find his treasure.
Brandon, Big B, Declan: Okay.
Nic Cage: You’d think with this big storm that we would be talking about how much it is raining.
Brandon: I tend to ignore the elements.
Gettin’ jiggy wid it! Na! Na! Na! Na! Na! Na! Na!
Declan: I got to take this.
Brandon: Who is it? I want to talk to them.
(Brandon grabs the phone out of Declan’s hand.)
Brandon: The Blessed One? Oh, The Blessed One. Yes, It’s me. I’m Declan Prescott. I’m the Significant Player. I have decided to fire you. Don’t call back.
(Brandon throws Declan’s phone out of sight.)
Brandon: He’s probably crying right now.
Declan: You son of a bitch. I loved that phone.
(Declan charges at Brandon.)
Nic Cage: I found the cave.
Declan: About time. You’re lucky. I’ll get you at Horizons.
Brandon: You have to make it through tubby this week on Sentinel.
Declan: Give me a break. He stands no chance.
Cara: Can we just go in the cave? I want to find this treasure.
(They head into the cave.)
Nic Cage: Nice cave they got here. It’s very roomy. The treasure should be all the way down there.
Cara: What if there is a bear or something?
Declan: Then I will protect you.
Cara: You’re so caring and loving.
Brandon: I could be like that too.
Cara: Yeah right. I’ve heard about your girlfriend problems.
Brandon: At least I’ve had a girlfriend unlike the fat guy behind me.
Big B: Always putting me down. I could have Sean Cyanide girl troubles.
(They all burst out laughing at Sean’s problems.)
Brandon: Poor fool.
In The Eyes of the Ranger,
The Unsuspecting Stranger,
Had Better Know the Truth of Wrong From Right,
Cause the Eyes of a Ranger are Upon You,
Any Wrong You do, He’s Gonna See,
When You’re In Texas, Look Behind You,
‘Cause That’s Where the Rangers Gonna Be.
(Declan hears Brandon’s phone and takes it.)
Declan: Walker, Texas Ranger?
Brandon: Don’t answer my phone.
Declan: Hello. Yes, this is Brandon Brown. Kyla? You know what I think of you. You are a stupid whore and I never want to talk to you again.
(Declan throws Brandon’s phone.)
Brandon: Damn. I’ve been waiting to say that same thing to her the whole day. You took my moment of glory. I hate you.
Declan: The feeling is mutual.
Brandon: Cage, you aren’t up to your usual craziness today. What’s wrong?
Nic Cage: I’m focused on finally finding a treasure. It’s my dream. We should be really close.
Cara: I can’t wait to find it.
BOOM!!!
(A loud Thunder bolt is heard and Cara jumps into Big B’s arms.)
Big B: Hello.
(Cara screams and jumps off of Big B.)
Cara: That’s the most disgusting thing I have ever done.
Big B: I liked it.
Brandon: Probably the first time you’ve touched a women in years.
Big B: Yeah. If you would excuse me, I’m going head out of the cave for a few seconds.
Brandon: You can beat off some other time. We got business to attend to.
Big B: How did you know I was going to do that?
Brandon: I accidentally looked down.
Cara: Gross.
Declan: I didn’t have to see that.
Nic Cage: I’m bigger.
Brandon: Dude. Back to the treasure hunt.
(They go a little further in the cave until Cage stops them.)
Nic Cage: It should be here. Let’s start digging.
(They all start digging except Cara.)
Cara: Dig faster. You guys are big strong men.
Brandon: Let’s see you dig, you stupid bitch.
(Declan throws dirt in Brandon’s face.)
Brandon: It’s on at Horizons.
Declan: Bring it.
It’s Elmo
It’s Elmo’s World
Brandon: Cage, is that your phone?
Nic Cage: Yes.
Declan: Elmo’s World?
Nic Cage: Kal-El loves Elmo.
Declan: Who is Kal-El?
Brandon: It’s his son. He thinks naming his kid after Superman’s Kryptonian name will give him superpowers.
Nic Cage: Just you wait. He will.
Big B: I found something. It looks like a chest.
Cara: I told you to stop looking at me.
Big B: Not that chest. A treasure chest.
Nic Cage: A treasure chest. I must see.
(Cage gets the treasure chest out.)
Nic Cage: It’s all mine. It’s all mine.
Brandon: We’re sharing the treasure right?
Nic Cage: Sharing? Yes. Share.
(Nic Cage throws a smoke bomb on the ground.)
Nic Cage: You’ll never catch me now.
Declan: Let’s get him.
Brandon: I can’t see though.
(The smoke clears and Cage is gone.)
Cara: He stole the treasure.
Declan: We shouldn’t have went with him.
Brandon: We have to team up and find him and get our treasure.
Declan: I hate to agree with you but you are right.
(Brandon and Declan start running for the cave exit.
Brandon: He can’t be too far ahead.
BOOM!!!
(Lightning strikes and a yell is heard.)
Declan: What was that?
Brandon: I don’t know but we have to find out.
(Declan and Brandon make it to the outside of the cave and they see Nic Cage on the ground knocked out from being struck by lightning.)
Declan: Is he dead?
Brandon: No, he is still breathing.
Declan: We never found out what was in the treasure.
Brandon: Open it.
(Declan opens the treasure.)
Declan: I don’t believe it. The Best of Reggae.
Brandon: I guess that’s what Barack Obama calls treasure.
(Cara and Big B catch up.)
Cara: Is he dead?
Brandon: No.
Big B: What was in the treasure?
Declan: The Best of Reggae.
Big B: Can I have that?
Declan: Take it.
Brandon: I figured out what saved Nic Cage. It was his Academy Award. I guess he really can thank the Academy.
(They all laugh as the scene ends.)
Brandon: You have got to be fucking kidding me.
(The demented figure shows himself to be Nic Cage.)
Nic Cage: Nice place you got here. I can’t believe you two thought you could get away from me.
Brandon: Do you have tracking devices on us or something?
Nic Cage: I do but I’m not going to tell you where. Now are you four going to help me find my treasure or not.
Declan: Get this guy out of here.
Cara: Isn’t that Nic Cage? We can’t disrespect a celebrity like him.
Big B: Brandon, they’re speaking in script form now.
Brandon: Shut up. I’m listening to their conversation.
Cara: Declan. I want to go look for treasure with him. I want to talk to him.
(Cara walks over to Nic Cage.)
Cara: I can’t believe Nic Cage is standing right in front of me.
Nic Cage: I knew this day would come. Your mother and I was only a one time thing. I didn’t know she would get pregnant. I am finally happy to meet my daughter though. Give your dad a hug.
Cara: I’m not your daughter.
Nic Cage: You’re not? Oh, of course you aren’t. I was just messing with you. I’m a bit of a jokester.
Brandon: Your career is a joke.
Nic Cage: Tell that to my Academy Award
Cara: You have an Academy Award?
Nic Cage: Why yes I do.
(Nic Cage pulls his Academy Award.)
Nic Cage: She’s a beauty.
Brandon: Do you take that with you everywhere?
Nic Cage: Why wouldn’t I?
Brandon: With you, I’m not even going to ask.
Nic Cage: Whatever. Can we look for treasure now?
Cara: Yes. I want to look for treasure with a real celebrity.
Declan: We’re not going with these idiots to look for treasure.
Nic Cage: You’ll help me though?
Declan:…
Cara: Please. I really want to go. You must not love me anymore.
Declan: That’s not fair. Fine. We’ll go treasure hunting with these morons.
Nic Cage: I can come too. It was my idea.
Declan:…
Cara: I’m going treasure hunting with a celebrity.
Declan: Where is this supposed treasure?
Nic Cage: It’s not too far from here. There is a cave where the treasure is buried.
Declan: How do you know this?
Nic Cage: Barack Obama told me.
(Declan, Cara, and Nic Cage head out the door while Brandon and Big B stay inside to discuss something.)
Brandon: I’m big on conspiracy theories. What if Declan and Cage are setting us up? What if Prescott really does want to train for our match so he’s trying to set something up to get rid of us?
Big B: I don’t know but we should follow them.
Brandon: You’re right. I wish Cage would have chosen a different day to treasure hunt. Does he not realize how bad this storm is?
(Brandon and Big B head outside and they follow the other three.)
Cara: Declan, I’m cold. Hold on to me.
Declan: Anything to please you.
Brandon: Get a room.
Declan: As always, you are just jealous that you don’t have what I have.
Big B: Burn.
Brandon: Nobody asked your fat ass. Cara. Do you have any sisters that are as hot as you?
Cara: I’m not telling you anything about my family.
Brandon: I just want to know.
Declan: Drop it.
Brandon: Come on Declan. If she has a sister, then maybe we could hook up. I could be like your brother-in-law then. We’d be the greatest wrestling family in wrestling.
Big B: The greatest wrestling family in wrestling?
Brandon: That was the best way I could put it.
Declan: I hate the thought of having to be related to you. That’s just disgusting.
Brandon: If you think I’m disgusting, you would be also related to this tubby dumbass over here.
Big B: Hey.
Cara: Can you men be quiet? I want to help Nic Cage find his treasure.
Brandon, Big B, Declan: Okay.
Nic Cage: You’d think with this big storm that we would be talking about how much it is raining.
Brandon: I tend to ignore the elements.
Gettin’ jiggy wid it! Na! Na! Na! Na! Na! Na! Na!
Declan: I got to take this.
Brandon: Who is it? I want to talk to them.
(Brandon grabs the phone out of Declan’s hand.)
Brandon: The Blessed One? Oh, The Blessed One. Yes, It’s me. I’m Declan Prescott. I’m the Significant Player. I have decided to fire you. Don’t call back.
(Brandon throws Declan’s phone out of sight.)
Brandon: He’s probably crying right now.
Declan: You son of a bitch. I loved that phone.
(Declan charges at Brandon.)
Nic Cage: I found the cave.
Declan: About time. You’re lucky. I’ll get you at Horizons.
Brandon: You have to make it through tubby this week on Sentinel.
Declan: Give me a break. He stands no chance.
Cara: Can we just go in the cave? I want to find this treasure.
(They head into the cave.)
Nic Cage: Nice cave they got here. It’s very roomy. The treasure should be all the way down there.
Cara: What if there is a bear or something?
Declan: Then I will protect you.
Cara: You’re so caring and loving.
Brandon: I could be like that too.
Cara: Yeah right. I’ve heard about your girlfriend problems.
Brandon: At least I’ve had a girlfriend unlike the fat guy behind me.
Big B: Always putting me down. I could have Sean Cyanide girl troubles.
(They all burst out laughing at Sean’s problems.)
Brandon: Poor fool.
In The Eyes of the Ranger,
The Unsuspecting Stranger,
Had Better Know the Truth of Wrong From Right,
Cause the Eyes of a Ranger are Upon You,
Any Wrong You do, He’s Gonna See,
When You’re In Texas, Look Behind You,
‘Cause That’s Where the Rangers Gonna Be.
(Declan hears Brandon’s phone and takes it.)
Declan: Walker, Texas Ranger?
Brandon: Don’t answer my phone.
Declan: Hello. Yes, this is Brandon Brown. Kyla? You know what I think of you. You are a stupid whore and I never want to talk to you again.
(Declan throws Brandon’s phone.)
Brandon: Damn. I’ve been waiting to say that same thing to her the whole day. You took my moment of glory. I hate you.
Declan: The feeling is mutual.
Brandon: Cage, you aren’t up to your usual craziness today. What’s wrong?
Nic Cage: I’m focused on finally finding a treasure. It’s my dream. We should be really close.
Cara: I can’t wait to find it.
BOOM!!!
(A loud Thunder bolt is heard and Cara jumps into Big B’s arms.)
Big B: Hello.
(Cara screams and jumps off of Big B.)
Cara: That’s the most disgusting thing I have ever done.
Big B: I liked it.
Brandon: Probably the first time you’ve touched a women in years.
Big B: Yeah. If you would excuse me, I’m going head out of the cave for a few seconds.
Brandon: You can beat off some other time. We got business to attend to.
Big B: How did you know I was going to do that?
Brandon: I accidentally looked down.
Cara: Gross.
Declan: I didn’t have to see that.
Nic Cage: I’m bigger.
Brandon: Dude. Back to the treasure hunt.
(They go a little further in the cave until Cage stops them.)
Nic Cage: It should be here. Let’s start digging.
(They all start digging except Cara.)
Cara: Dig faster. You guys are big strong men.
Brandon: Let’s see you dig, you stupid bitch.
(Declan throws dirt in Brandon’s face.)
Brandon: It’s on at Horizons.
Declan: Bring it.
It’s Elmo
It’s Elmo’s World
Brandon: Cage, is that your phone?
Nic Cage: Yes.
Declan: Elmo’s World?
Nic Cage: Kal-El loves Elmo.
Declan: Who is Kal-El?
Brandon: It’s his son. He thinks naming his kid after Superman’s Kryptonian name will give him superpowers.
Nic Cage: Just you wait. He will.
Big B: I found something. It looks like a chest.
Cara: I told you to stop looking at me.
Big B: Not that chest. A treasure chest.
Nic Cage: A treasure chest. I must see.
(Cage gets the treasure chest out.)
Nic Cage: It’s all mine. It’s all mine.
Brandon: We’re sharing the treasure right?
Nic Cage: Sharing? Yes. Share.
(Nic Cage throws a smoke bomb on the ground.)
Nic Cage: You’ll never catch me now.
Declan: Let’s get him.
Brandon: I can’t see though.
(The smoke clears and Cage is gone.)
Cara: He stole the treasure.
Declan: We shouldn’t have went with him.
Brandon: We have to team up and find him and get our treasure.
Declan: I hate to agree with you but you are right.
(Brandon and Declan start running for the cave exit.
Brandon: He can’t be too far ahead.
BOOM!!!
(Lightning strikes and a yell is heard.)
Declan: What was that?
Brandon: I don’t know but we have to find out.
(Declan and Brandon make it to the outside of the cave and they see Nic Cage on the ground knocked out from being struck by lightning.)
Declan: Is he dead?
Brandon: No, he is still breathing.
Declan: We never found out what was in the treasure.
Brandon: Open it.
(Declan opens the treasure.)
Declan: I don’t believe it. The Best of Reggae.
Brandon: I guess that’s what Barack Obama calls treasure.
(Cara and Big B catch up.)
Cara: Is he dead?
Brandon: No.
Big B: What was in the treasure?
Declan: The Best of Reggae.
Big B: Can I have that?
Declan: Take it.
Brandon: I figured out what saved Nic Cage. It was his Academy Award. I guess he really can thank the Academy.
(They all laugh as the scene ends.)