Post by Magdalena Lockheart on Jul 15, 2021 22:57:06 GMT -5
- July 2021 -
Vignette day. God I freaking hate it.
Days like this make me sometimes wish that I'd have never left Cornell.
I blame Netflix, gosh darn it. I blame shows like Gossip Girls and Game of Thrones and TWD and Jessica freaking Jones. Why is it that the effervescent allure of a 72 inch, 4K, ultra-high def liquid crystal display draws me in like the common hofmannophila pseudospretella feels drawn to relentlessly headbutt an Edison bulb?
Ugh.
It's no wonder that year after year no one volunteers for vignette day. It's like the literal opposite of pretzel day.
It's not fair to stick me in a room like this. No TV? That's just rude. Not to mention the revolving door of crazy. Some of these people I'm like, hyper familiar with. Pierce? MacLean? I feel like I've done those interviews like... a million times before. It's the Thors and the Lopezes and the Youngs and Zundiches... Zundiches? Zduniches? Zduniches. Those are the ones that worry me.
It's the anxiety of not really knowing what it is my hater bosses put me into mixed with the boredom of asking the same freaking questions over and over and over and over and over and over and over again...
...and no TV in between.
Ughhh-
Whatever. Get yourself together, Roxy Malone. If you don't think about it too much, you'll be home scarfing down ice-cream watching the Loki series finale before you know it. Do it for the cause. ALL HAIL KING ALLIGATOR LOKIIII-
* * *
10:30 AM
"Tell me why you're going to win the WrestleStock Open tournament this year."
11:13 AM
"So, could you tell me why you're going to win the WrestleStock Open tournament this year?"
1:18 PM
"Why are you going to win the UGWC WrestleStock Open tournament this year and not the other competitors in the contest?"
4:27 PM
"So, ugh, you're going to win WrestleStock you say. Yeah? No kidding. Haven't heard that one before. You uhh, you sound pretty sure about that. You mind telling me why though?"
5:39 PM
"Let me guess. You, too, are guaranteeing victory, hmm? No crap. How many people are in this darn thing this year anyway?! Pssht, it's only the freaking Open... Why won't it ever freaking end?!"
* * *
7:13 PM
As it turns out, the same freaking question can only be asked about half-dozen different ways before the human mind stops giving an entire shit about the endeavor altogether.
This was today's torture: the seventh circle of hell on Earth. What it looked like was a generic backdrop with a UGWC logo on it. What was featured was an empty, unassuming steel folding chair.
UGWC Backstage interviewer Roxy Malone glanced down at her pink-strapped apple wristwatch with all of the hope she could muster, yet only shook her head in disgust. If the seconds ticked by any slower, she'd be going nowhere; stuck in this studio in an endless loop of boredom... forever.
"Ugggh," she groaned incredulously, tapping the tip of her pen to her little notepad. "Twelve. Twelve freaking interviews in one day. And wouldn't you know it? Just my freaking luck that the very... last... one just so happens to be running late."
"Yeah," the voice of a man acknowledged from behind the camera, "it sucks but what can ya do about it sometimes, ya know?"
Grunt. Pout. Scream. Cry. Grab two fistfuls of her own hair and yank until every single strand comes out at the root. Roxy wasn't sure which answer suited her mood best at the time. None of them sounded wrong though.
"Any word at all on when she thought she'd might make it? Some of us do have lives we'd like to get back to someday-"
"Nope. She said that she'd be here soon, though."
"When'd she say that?"
"...about twenty minutes ago."
"Damn it!"
