Post by Jet Somers on Mar 9, 2012 16:51:31 GMT -5
Before us is a starry sprawl of the cosmos. The camera pans across this
sky-scape, and finishes on an eerily floating four sided Jumbotron like
you'd see at an NBA game. It rotates on an imaginary axis; the first side
shows us scenes from Horizons 2011; the second side rotates into view
and we are treated to images from Wrestlestock last summer; side three
is a recap of this year's Infinity event. Finally, as the fourth side spins
into view, a digital background with ever increasing numbers is
embossed over by block letters announcing the show: "The Score"
The camera view descends, leaving the spinning title card behind, and
comes to rest on the roof of a building. A helicopter circles the building
with a spotlight, and the spotlight is trained on a podium, behind which
stands Travis Pierce in a stunning black tuxedo, trimmed with crimson
vest, and tie. The camera tightens up the angle, and around his waist,
taking the place of a cumberbund, is his half of the UGWC Cooperative
Championship.
Travis Pierce: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the
very first edition of The Score, brought to you by Jet Somers as part of
the Pierced Media Network! We're here live at Rising Sun 2012 in Tokyo,
Japan, just moments away from the real main event, the historic first
defense of the Cooperative Championships by The Wild Truth! But we'll
get to that soon enough. First, let me introduce the host of The Score: he
is the most dangerous weapon in the sports entertainment industry, one
half of the UGWC's most celebrated cooperative team ever, the Twisted
Ninja himself, Jet Somers!
A second spotlight comes to life, highlighting a stringed quartet which
begins playing a classical instrumental version of "Everybody Down."
From the darkness behind them, Jet Somers, similarly adorned in tux
and belt, but carrying index cards in his left hand. Canned applause from
offcamera welcomes him as he steps up to the podium, shakes his
partner's hand, and takes Travis' place as the podium.
Jet Somers: Welcome to "The Score!"
More applause as Jet shuffles the cards and clears his throat.
Jet Somers: Below us, the Chaos Championship match is crashing to a
close, and that only gives us a few minutes to get underway. Without
further ado, bring up the lights!
All around the roof, spotlights spring to life, illuminating the entire set. As
the quartet launches into "Warrior Heart" by Paul Cecchetti, we see the
sinister game show's workings. Besides the podium in the center, and
the quartet off to the side, there are at equal intervals, platforms
stretching out eight feet from the edge. On the end of each of the
platforms, a figure wearing a hood stands trembling in the winds that
wash over the building.
Jet Somers: Tonight, we will bear witness to a settling of scores. These
contestants will face certain peril, or ultimate victory!
As the camera circles the rooftop dramatically, we notice that each
platform is supported by a trap mechanism.
Jet Somers: Don't worry, folks. If the highlight footage that Trav went to
great lengths to obtain is any indication, none of these contestants are in
danger. You see, should we hold true to habit and score all the pinfalls in
our bout, every person here will survive the game. If, however, a pinfall
is scored against either Travis or myself, one random platform will fall
away sending the player plummeting to the sidewalk below!
The figures visibly are quaking at the ends of their planks as Jet's
enthusiastic announcement is proclaimed.
He glances over to where Travis is pointing at his watch.
Jet Somers: Right, let's meet our contestants!
---
Cut to the confessional.
Pierce: How he managed to abduct some of them is beyond me.
Cut back to the Tokyo Dome.
---
Jet Somers: And our last contestant, none other than our own Pepper
Phoenix!
He rips the hood from over Pepper's head, revealing a gagged rumors
correspondent perched out over nothingness. Pepper stares daggers at
Jet, but The Wild Card merely slaps his colleague on the back, nearly
shoving him off the edge of the plank. He laughs heartily.
Jet Somers: Don't worry, Pepper, it won't get all the way to you.
Jet steps off the platform, careful to step over the dummy hole put in place
should any of the contestants get cute and try to back out, and rejoins his
partner at the roof entrance. The camera pulls in close on the Cooperative
Champions.
Travis Pierce: And remember, the person or persons left standing when
we have successfully retained our championships will be offered co-
hosting duties on a PMN broadcast for the entire run up to the next big
UGWC event!
Jet Somers: Good luck to all of our contestants, and remember, keep
your eye on the blimp circling the arena, as it will be broadcasting the
rest of the show, and keeping you well informed of your fates!
Travis Pierce: Come on, we've got a title defense to get to!
With that, both men reach up and rip off their own tuxedos, revealing
their traditional wrestling attire beneath. They shake hands one last time
and rush through the door to their match.
---
Cut to the confessional.
Pierce: This entrance was pure genius. I know this is Jet's moment, but I
did manage to secure some of the performers for him. But he outlined,
planned, and coreographed the entire sequence. I'm sure Vines is going
to complain that it ate up not only valuable broadcasting time, but that it
took away exposure from RemiTude and PeterMona. Well, this is what
happens when you're the champions.
Cut to the Tokyo Dome.
---
Vinegar: It hasn’t escaped our view as Travis Pierce and Jet Somers
climb down from the turnbuckles, that they have each brought a
microphone, which means yet more wasted time before we can get on
with our match.
Lieberjosch: Haters gonna hate.
Vinegar: Did you really just say that?
Lieberjosch: I’m just reiterating that this is, so far, the most entertaining
moment I’ve seen on a pay per view outside of the actual matches, and
hell, the men who have provided most of the moments bell to bell are
standing here ready to speak. This already has my vote for match of the
night, and Rhombus hasn’t even lifted his hammer yet.
Covert Jay: Ninja Speech!
Somers: That’s ok, guys, I know you’re frustrated about the new
conditions under which you have to compete, but just remember, their
fates are in your hands.
Vinegar: TPW addressing their opponents now.
Somers: It shouldn’t be hard for you to decide what to do for the next
five minutes or so. I mean not only do we have the most wholesome tag
team since Alex Kiseragi and Brandon Brown, but we’ve also managed to
get The Mistress and her Indentured Servant thrown in the mix to give
us a bit more of a challenge for these championships.
Pierce: I don’t know, it seems to me like bringing a knife to a gun fight.
Lieberjosch: The self-proclaimed saviors and the DoP not liking this
morsel of piercing truth.
Somers: But it’s all about entertainment, right? Has the Cooperative
Championship been talked about, or even watched, as much as it is
now? Have we, your deserving champions, both former World
Champions, ever been as big as we are now, even in this traditionally
throwaway division?
Pierce: Our own World Heavyweight Champion, Phrixus Deimos, the
example we are all supposed to follow, even threw away his cooperative
partner.
Somers: That’s right. You see, I’ve had to learn a hard lesson up to this
point, and it’s this; you can’t be a crusader in this business. Anyone here
can tell you I’ve put down more than my fair share of villains and
monsters in my time, but in the end, you’re always heading out into the
night to find another crime to punish. You can’t polish crap, and I’ve
always thought this business was a steaming pile of it.
Vinegar: And now you’ve fully embraced your role as a member of it…
Somers: And you can’t manacle yourself to someone you actually have
any sort of emotions for, either. Don’t get me wrong, a better partner is
hard to find, and Travis and I know how to look out for one another, but
in the end, it’s all business. When you are putting yourself in harm’s way,
begging to fight psychopaths, and generally making an ass of yourself
just to defend the honor of someone who chooses to represent this
business, you’re in too deep. The day I find myself bringing Travis
breakfast in bed is the day I realize I’ve taken the partnership too far,
and we’ve become a liability to one another.
Pierce: I do like onion bagels, Jet, should the notion ever take you.
Lieberjosch: Why would anyone outside of a couple ever do that? What is
he talking about?
Somers: So here’s my professional advice to the four of you; we all
know you’re not going to walk out of here with these championships, but
if you want to ever stand a chance of bringing something realistic and
memorable to the table around here, why not fight for yourselves
tonight? Look over the turnbuckle and take a good hard look at the
person supporting you tonight and ask yourself this question: Is he or
she worth embarrassing myself over, or is he or she simply a means to
an end? When you figure out the answer to that question, you’ll know if
the person in your corner is a liability, or a weapon, and you’ll know
whether or not you’re ready to continue the tradition we started, the
excellence we’ve brought to this division.
Covert Jay: Is it just me, or does it seem like Jet has this notion about
redefining every division he competes in?
Somers: I take nothing away from the skill and talent of my opponents
here. I wish each of your teams luck in your future endeavors, and I
sincerely hope you can all learn a valuable lesson from Travis and I, but
tonight? Tonight belongs to the entertainers.
Vinegar: Alright, they’re done, ring the bell already!
Ding!
sky-scape, and finishes on an eerily floating four sided Jumbotron like
you'd see at an NBA game. It rotates on an imaginary axis; the first side
shows us scenes from Horizons 2011; the second side rotates into view
and we are treated to images from Wrestlestock last summer; side three
is a recap of this year's Infinity event. Finally, as the fourth side spins
into view, a digital background with ever increasing numbers is
embossed over by block letters announcing the show: "The Score"
The camera view descends, leaving the spinning title card behind, and
comes to rest on the roof of a building. A helicopter circles the building
with a spotlight, and the spotlight is trained on a podium, behind which
stands Travis Pierce in a stunning black tuxedo, trimmed with crimson
vest, and tie. The camera tightens up the angle, and around his waist,
taking the place of a cumberbund, is his half of the UGWC Cooperative
Championship.
Travis Pierce: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the
very first edition of The Score, brought to you by Jet Somers as part of
the Pierced Media Network! We're here live at Rising Sun 2012 in Tokyo,
Japan, just moments away from the real main event, the historic first
defense of the Cooperative Championships by The Wild Truth! But we'll
get to that soon enough. First, let me introduce the host of The Score: he
is the most dangerous weapon in the sports entertainment industry, one
half of the UGWC's most celebrated cooperative team ever, the Twisted
Ninja himself, Jet Somers!
A second spotlight comes to life, highlighting a stringed quartet which
begins playing a classical instrumental version of "Everybody Down."
From the darkness behind them, Jet Somers, similarly adorned in tux
and belt, but carrying index cards in his left hand. Canned applause from
offcamera welcomes him as he steps up to the podium, shakes his
partner's hand, and takes Travis' place as the podium.
Jet Somers: Welcome to "The Score!"
More applause as Jet shuffles the cards and clears his throat.
Jet Somers: Below us, the Chaos Championship match is crashing to a
close, and that only gives us a few minutes to get underway. Without
further ado, bring up the lights!
All around the roof, spotlights spring to life, illuminating the entire set. As
the quartet launches into "Warrior Heart" by Paul Cecchetti, we see the
sinister game show's workings. Besides the podium in the center, and
the quartet off to the side, there are at equal intervals, platforms
stretching out eight feet from the edge. On the end of each of the
platforms, a figure wearing a hood stands trembling in the winds that
wash over the building.
Jet Somers: Tonight, we will bear witness to a settling of scores. These
contestants will face certain peril, or ultimate victory!
As the camera circles the rooftop dramatically, we notice that each
platform is supported by a trap mechanism.
Jet Somers: Don't worry, folks. If the highlight footage that Trav went to
great lengths to obtain is any indication, none of these contestants are in
danger. You see, should we hold true to habit and score all the pinfalls in
our bout, every person here will survive the game. If, however, a pinfall
is scored against either Travis or myself, one random platform will fall
away sending the player plummeting to the sidewalk below!
The figures visibly are quaking at the ends of their planks as Jet's
enthusiastic announcement is proclaimed.
He glances over to where Travis is pointing at his watch.
Jet Somers: Right, let's meet our contestants!
---
Cut to the confessional.
Pierce: How he managed to abduct some of them is beyond me.
Cut back to the Tokyo Dome.
---
Jet Somers: And our last contestant, none other than our own Pepper
Phoenix!
He rips the hood from over Pepper's head, revealing a gagged rumors
correspondent perched out over nothingness. Pepper stares daggers at
Jet, but The Wild Card merely slaps his colleague on the back, nearly
shoving him off the edge of the plank. He laughs heartily.
Jet Somers: Don't worry, Pepper, it won't get all the way to you.
Jet steps off the platform, careful to step over the dummy hole put in place
should any of the contestants get cute and try to back out, and rejoins his
partner at the roof entrance. The camera pulls in close on the Cooperative
Champions.
Travis Pierce: And remember, the person or persons left standing when
we have successfully retained our championships will be offered co-
hosting duties on a PMN broadcast for the entire run up to the next big
UGWC event!
Jet Somers: Good luck to all of our contestants, and remember, keep
your eye on the blimp circling the arena, as it will be broadcasting the
rest of the show, and keeping you well informed of your fates!
Travis Pierce: Come on, we've got a title defense to get to!
With that, both men reach up and rip off their own tuxedos, revealing
their traditional wrestling attire beneath. They shake hands one last time
and rush through the door to their match.
---
Cut to the confessional.
Pierce: This entrance was pure genius. I know this is Jet's moment, but I
did manage to secure some of the performers for him. But he outlined,
planned, and coreographed the entire sequence. I'm sure Vines is going
to complain that it ate up not only valuable broadcasting time, but that it
took away exposure from RemiTude and PeterMona. Well, this is what
happens when you're the champions.
Cut to the Tokyo Dome.
---
Vinegar: It hasn’t escaped our view as Travis Pierce and Jet Somers
climb down from the turnbuckles, that they have each brought a
microphone, which means yet more wasted time before we can get on
with our match.
Lieberjosch: Haters gonna hate.
Vinegar: Did you really just say that?
Lieberjosch: I’m just reiterating that this is, so far, the most entertaining
moment I’ve seen on a pay per view outside of the actual matches, and
hell, the men who have provided most of the moments bell to bell are
standing here ready to speak. This already has my vote for match of the
night, and Rhombus hasn’t even lifted his hammer yet.
Covert Jay: Ninja Speech!
Somers: That’s ok, guys, I know you’re frustrated about the new
conditions under which you have to compete, but just remember, their
fates are in your hands.
Vinegar: TPW addressing their opponents now.
Somers: It shouldn’t be hard for you to decide what to do for the next
five minutes or so. I mean not only do we have the most wholesome tag
team since Alex Kiseragi and Brandon Brown, but we’ve also managed to
get The Mistress and her Indentured Servant thrown in the mix to give
us a bit more of a challenge for these championships.
Pierce: I don’t know, it seems to me like bringing a knife to a gun fight.
Lieberjosch: The self-proclaimed saviors and the DoP not liking this
morsel of piercing truth.
Somers: But it’s all about entertainment, right? Has the Cooperative
Championship been talked about, or even watched, as much as it is
now? Have we, your deserving champions, both former World
Champions, ever been as big as we are now, even in this traditionally
throwaway division?
Pierce: Our own World Heavyweight Champion, Phrixus Deimos, the
example we are all supposed to follow, even threw away his cooperative
partner.
Somers: That’s right. You see, I’ve had to learn a hard lesson up to this
point, and it’s this; you can’t be a crusader in this business. Anyone here
can tell you I’ve put down more than my fair share of villains and
monsters in my time, but in the end, you’re always heading out into the
night to find another crime to punish. You can’t polish crap, and I’ve
always thought this business was a steaming pile of it.
Vinegar: And now you’ve fully embraced your role as a member of it…
Somers: And you can’t manacle yourself to someone you actually have
any sort of emotions for, either. Don’t get me wrong, a better partner is
hard to find, and Travis and I know how to look out for one another, but
in the end, it’s all business. When you are putting yourself in harm’s way,
begging to fight psychopaths, and generally making an ass of yourself
just to defend the honor of someone who chooses to represent this
business, you’re in too deep. The day I find myself bringing Travis
breakfast in bed is the day I realize I’ve taken the partnership too far,
and we’ve become a liability to one another.
Pierce: I do like onion bagels, Jet, should the notion ever take you.
Lieberjosch: Why would anyone outside of a couple ever do that? What is
he talking about?
Somers: So here’s my professional advice to the four of you; we all
know you’re not going to walk out of here with these championships, but
if you want to ever stand a chance of bringing something realistic and
memorable to the table around here, why not fight for yourselves
tonight? Look over the turnbuckle and take a good hard look at the
person supporting you tonight and ask yourself this question: Is he or
she worth embarrassing myself over, or is he or she simply a means to
an end? When you figure out the answer to that question, you’ll know if
the person in your corner is a liability, or a weapon, and you’ll know
whether or not you’re ready to continue the tradition we started, the
excellence we’ve brought to this division.
Covert Jay: Is it just me, or does it seem like Jet has this notion about
redefining every division he competes in?
Somers: I take nothing away from the skill and talent of my opponents
here. I wish each of your teams luck in your future endeavors, and I
sincerely hope you can all learn a valuable lesson from Travis and I, but
tonight? Tonight belongs to the entertainers.
Vinegar: Alright, they’re done, ring the bell already!
Ding!