Post by Killian King on Nov 22, 2014 23:57:37 GMT -5
In the bleak nothingness that is a darkened screen, slowly the growingly popular words etched in white begin to apear.
“The Following Is Paid For... By The Piercing Media Network.”
We see a darkened set cast, with silhouettes of a table. A deep voice is heard from Richard Nottingham
Nottingham: Ladies and Gents... This is the host from here on out of The Piercing Bloody Truth, you know this dodgy bastards name, he is The Arbiter of Violence... KILLIAN KING!
“The Devil in I” by Slipknot begins to play, and the lights come on to show a chair sitting backwards behind the desk. A monitor behind the chair shows the logo for The Piercing Truth. The chair slow turns around, revealing not Travis Pierce or Trevor Sharp but indeed that of “The Crucible” Killian King.
Killian: Welcome to the show, you beautiful, intelligent sexy lot you... I am evident by my rugged but flawless looks not...Trevor Sharp, an unfortunate but ever always your usual party host. But with already one vast improvement welcome to the Piercing Truth, where your former host based all his good cereal choices, solely on the mascot.
Killian switches to Camera B.
Killian: A huge week for UGWC both in marketing as well as merchandise as the fed continues to sneak it's way into every orifice of your home and family. Current World Champion Remi Monroe signs his biggest deal yet, a lucrative contract for his own Championship Combo Box at participating Popeye's; leading one to wonder if his reign as champion will be like his value meal and offered for a limited time only. Makes you wonder what kind of toys the kids meal will come with though doesn't it?
Nottingham: I couldn't give a shit really...
Killian: Spot on Richard... one thing too give a shit about however is the newest top selling item of UGWC merchandise, the very stylish and suave designed “Her Majesty's Most Beloved Grappler” tee shirt now available on the website and all fine UGWC merchandise stands.
Nottingham: God Save...
Killian switches to Camera A.
Killian: In other news American actor Bill Cosby stands an man who's legacy hangs in the balance as he's being accused of quite possibly of having sexual misconduct with every woman ever known to exists on Earth, Except for her Majesty...
Nottingham: God Save...
The “Piercing Truth” logo changes to a portrait styled picture of Queen Elizabeth.
King: God Save... Sixteen women in total have come public with allegations and details of his dodgy behavior. Bill Cosby had this to say...
King: Which makes about as much sense as any Harley Addams promo...
Killian switches to Camera B.
King: On a related note this week, after not being booked by management last week after an impressive victory over the reigning World Heavyweight Champion and the former Cross-Hemisphere Champion in Remi Monroe and one Klaus Von Knornne, I and my tag team partner The Vain One will be putting up our Tag Team Gold against the biggest loud mouth bitch in the likes of the DMW... and he's bringing Harley Addams too.
Killian switches to Camera A.
King: Klaus who once taunted the masses with his stated “Come and Take it” leaves me with nothing to gain from this victory after Red Fusion “Came and Took It”. This current downward spiral he finds himself falls at the feet of declaring himself “The Self Proclaimed Savior” of the masses against a tyrannical perpetrator that is PMN... he looks to take down an entire network of corporations that spans the world, but hasn't mastered the idea of brushing the potato chip crumbs from his matted beard or unkempt mane of hair.
Killian switches to Camera B.
King: Speaking about dieing careers, and death... A British magazine has released the number one song topping the charts of final requests at funerals in the UK, is Monty Python's “Brighter Side of Life”.
Killian switches to Camera A.
King: That’s all the time we have this week, we’ll chat I'm sure yet again, and remember! It’s not my fault that the truth...hurts. Don't forget to have your pets, and DMW bastards spayed and neutered.
”The Brighter Side of Life” plays as we fade out…
Don't trip you know I'm always by your side
You'll be fine for the ride just be calm
Take a breath and don't cry
Look on the bright side
Scenes of Killian beating down Jet Somer's and choking him out with a steel pipe.
Rise up now make an impact
Now get your bags packed
Think about your life, the thrill
Don't you cry look on the bright side of life
Scenes of Kurt Brady being mutilated on Synergy and left in a bloody mess.
Somebody told me everything's alright
That life's too short to be afraid
Just leading up to what I want to say
Living should be giving it away
You're contemplating every single day
And learning so we educate and be positive
It is what it is, come on set examples for the kids
Scenes of Ezekiel Pax having his head caves in with the wrench known as Agnes.
I don't want to scare you no I don't
It's time you be a role model so open up
Scenes of Remi Monroe on the receiving end of The Libertine...
Somebody told me everything's alright
That life's too short to be afraid
Just leading up to what I want to say
Living should be giving it away
You're contemplating every single day
And learning so we educate and be positive
It is what it is, come on set examples for the kids
Scenes of Dirge being attacked by Killian King and left on the floor.
I don't want to scare you no I don't
It's time you be a role model so open up
Scenes of recently Chaos having his head shoved face first onto a steel chair under the curb stomp of Killian King.
Don't trip you know I'm always by your side
You'll be fine for the ride just be calm
Take a breath and don't cry
Look on the bright side
The screen grows dark but the song can still be heard...
