Post by Lord Hastings on Dec 13, 2015 17:08:19 GMT -5
Hastings: People think that I don’t understand. That I am somehow simple-minded about it all. It’s amusing to me, really. They say the greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing the world he didn’t exist. Mine must be the way I reel you all in, time and again, allow you to think i am confused or lost, that I am out of touch with reality, or that I live in a big pretend world. Through it all the evidence keeps staring you right in the face, what I’ve done and accomplished, but you disregard it. I’ve set records and done the unprecedented, but it must be some kind of a fluke. You overlook it, because even though I remind you of it, I tell you just a little louder to look at something else, and you do. You see whatever I tell you to see, each and every time.
Donovan smiles.
Hastings: In a lot of ways, Red Fusion and I started UGWC together, didn’t we? Red Fusion, the final LWF World Champion, against Donovan Hastings, the final GIW Global Champion, headlining No Holds Barred to determine the first ever UGWC World Heavyweight Champion. It was a can’t miss event in a lot of ways. How could it not be? I had been the Global Champ for months, having won the title from Travis Roberts at Horizons and already turned back challenges from Raenius and Dirge. Red Fusion was newly crowned and untested, but a year prior in LWF at Lockmania, Fusion had defeated me inside the Killer Kage. It seemed perfect.
Donovan smirks and shakes his head.
Hastings: The reality is that Red Fusion was the champion more or less by default. Yeah, he won a six person Elimination Chamber match to win the title, but where was his competition? The real icons of LWF were otherwise occupied to the extent that Fusion’s World Title opportunity wasn’t even the main event. Fusion’s opponents? Diablo, Medos, Lone Wolf, John Russo, and the defending champion, Derick Felix. Yes, he beat five people, but they may as well have been five fans out of the crowd. Triple M was settling up with Psiko. Fear was in one of his cycles of obscurity. I had left LWF to focus on my responsibilities as the Global Champion. Arelas and Phoenix, the two biggest legends of LWF, main evented the show to settle their rivalry once and for all, and it was all that mattered as the promotion faded to black. Nine years of existence, Red Fusion was the World Champion for forty minutes of it and a topic of discussion for exactly zero of those forty minutes. If he hadn’t carried the title forward into UGWC he would have been nothing more than a trivia question that would be answered after nobody got it right and somebody had to google it, because nobody would have believed it.
Donovan takes a deep breath and exhales.
Hastings: So almost a year ago, Red Fusion decides he wants to drop his moniker and just be known as Dave Rydell. Yeah, I know. I’ve known all along. I’ve just never seen the point. You assume when somebody does something like this, they essentially rebrand themselves, it’s part of an effort to do something different, be something different. I just see the same old shit. Red Fusion was a guy that jumped on bandwagons and got caught up in whatever direction he thought the wind might blow that week, and despite having no reason to mess with the Syndicate this year, he threw in his lot with the other rubber hobos. He’s always been a hamster that didn’t understand to stop touching the electrified food. He certainly knows how to eventually get his hands on it, doesn’t he? Ran into the Klaus wall time and again until he broke through it. Can you imagine if he ever actually stored up the funds to start cashing in monthly title shots against the World Heavyweight Champion?
Donovan shudders.
Hastings: I mean, if he beats me at Horizons, you go right ahead and give him a shot at the champ when we come back next year, whoever it may be, Travis or Vain. He would deserve it, because it would mean he actually did something he hasn’t been able to do yet, and that’s evolve. Yeah, he has a podcast now. Kudos. What about that was original? That he doesn’t care about the welfare or promotion of his guests? People ask why some of us always went on Pierce’s mess even though we couldn’t stand him. It was because he knew enough to understand that if he made you look bad, then he looked bad too. It was about sustainability. Whatever you want to call him, Fusion, Rydell, he dumps on whoever is dumb enough to go on there, and now everybody knows to stay away from it.
Coppi: Donovan, this is all good stuff, but can you wait until the camera is running?
Hastings: Right, of course, go ahead.
Both sit on stools just a few feet apart in Coppi’s interview studio.
Coppi: Are we ready over there?
After a few moments, a cameraman nods. A stage hand counts down, and points at Grey Coppi.
Coppi: Welcome to a special Horizons edition of Making Coppis, I’m here with the Lord of Pain, and Donovan, you-
Hastings: Lord.
Coppi: Right, Lord Hastings, in just a few days at Horizons you’ll finally be set one on one against Dave Rydell, in a much anticipated match-up.
Hastings: That assumes this mythical creature actually bothers to show up. No, more likely he’ll send the peasant Red Fusion to face me in his stead once again, and we all know how that one will turn out, won’t we? Simply put, it isn’t worth my time. I’m not about to bother myself with him and his nonsense. Still, if Rydell does show up at last, it isn’t going to matter. We know how that will end too. It’s simply...inevitable.
Coppi waits a couple moments, but Donovan is clearly finished.
Coppi: Well, thank you for your time.
A signal from off-camera indicates that filming has ceased, and Donovan begins to leave.
Coppi: What was that?
Hastings: I don’t know what you mean.
Coppi: Why didn’t you say any of that stuff you said before?
Hastings: Because appearances are everything. See you next time.
With that, Donovan takes his leave.
Donovan smiles.
Hastings: In a lot of ways, Red Fusion and I started UGWC together, didn’t we? Red Fusion, the final LWF World Champion, against Donovan Hastings, the final GIW Global Champion, headlining No Holds Barred to determine the first ever UGWC World Heavyweight Champion. It was a can’t miss event in a lot of ways. How could it not be? I had been the Global Champ for months, having won the title from Travis Roberts at Horizons and already turned back challenges from Raenius and Dirge. Red Fusion was newly crowned and untested, but a year prior in LWF at Lockmania, Fusion had defeated me inside the Killer Kage. It seemed perfect.
Donovan smirks and shakes his head.
Hastings: The reality is that Red Fusion was the champion more or less by default. Yeah, he won a six person Elimination Chamber match to win the title, but where was his competition? The real icons of LWF were otherwise occupied to the extent that Fusion’s World Title opportunity wasn’t even the main event. Fusion’s opponents? Diablo, Medos, Lone Wolf, John Russo, and the defending champion, Derick Felix. Yes, he beat five people, but they may as well have been five fans out of the crowd. Triple M was settling up with Psiko. Fear was in one of his cycles of obscurity. I had left LWF to focus on my responsibilities as the Global Champion. Arelas and Phoenix, the two biggest legends of LWF, main evented the show to settle their rivalry once and for all, and it was all that mattered as the promotion faded to black. Nine years of existence, Red Fusion was the World Champion for forty minutes of it and a topic of discussion for exactly zero of those forty minutes. If he hadn’t carried the title forward into UGWC he would have been nothing more than a trivia question that would be answered after nobody got it right and somebody had to google it, because nobody would have believed it.
Donovan takes a deep breath and exhales.
Hastings: So almost a year ago, Red Fusion decides he wants to drop his moniker and just be known as Dave Rydell. Yeah, I know. I’ve known all along. I’ve just never seen the point. You assume when somebody does something like this, they essentially rebrand themselves, it’s part of an effort to do something different, be something different. I just see the same old shit. Red Fusion was a guy that jumped on bandwagons and got caught up in whatever direction he thought the wind might blow that week, and despite having no reason to mess with the Syndicate this year, he threw in his lot with the other rubber hobos. He’s always been a hamster that didn’t understand to stop touching the electrified food. He certainly knows how to eventually get his hands on it, doesn’t he? Ran into the Klaus wall time and again until he broke through it. Can you imagine if he ever actually stored up the funds to start cashing in monthly title shots against the World Heavyweight Champion?
Donovan shudders.
Hastings: I mean, if he beats me at Horizons, you go right ahead and give him a shot at the champ when we come back next year, whoever it may be, Travis or Vain. He would deserve it, because it would mean he actually did something he hasn’t been able to do yet, and that’s evolve. Yeah, he has a podcast now. Kudos. What about that was original? That he doesn’t care about the welfare or promotion of his guests? People ask why some of us always went on Pierce’s mess even though we couldn’t stand him. It was because he knew enough to understand that if he made you look bad, then he looked bad too. It was about sustainability. Whatever you want to call him, Fusion, Rydell, he dumps on whoever is dumb enough to go on there, and now everybody knows to stay away from it.
Coppi: Donovan, this is all good stuff, but can you wait until the camera is running?
Hastings: Right, of course, go ahead.
Both sit on stools just a few feet apart in Coppi’s interview studio.
Coppi: Are we ready over there?
After a few moments, a cameraman nods. A stage hand counts down, and points at Grey Coppi.
Coppi: Welcome to a special Horizons edition of Making Coppis, I’m here with the Lord of Pain, and Donovan, you-
Hastings: Lord.
Coppi: Right, Lord Hastings, in just a few days at Horizons you’ll finally be set one on one against Dave Rydell, in a much anticipated match-up.
Hastings: That assumes this mythical creature actually bothers to show up. No, more likely he’ll send the peasant Red Fusion to face me in his stead once again, and we all know how that one will turn out, won’t we? Simply put, it isn’t worth my time. I’m not about to bother myself with him and his nonsense. Still, if Rydell does show up at last, it isn’t going to matter. We know how that will end too. It’s simply...inevitable.
Coppi waits a couple moments, but Donovan is clearly finished.
Coppi: Well, thank you for your time.
A signal from off-camera indicates that filming has ceased, and Donovan begins to leave.
Coppi: What was that?
Hastings: I don’t know what you mean.
Coppi: Why didn’t you say any of that stuff you said before?
Hastings: Because appearances are everything. See you next time.
With that, Donovan takes his leave.
