Massive Melee 2018

[DrunkenBuzzsaw]

Vinegar: Welcome to the Quicken Loans Arena in Cleveland, Ohio, welcome to the Massive Melee!

Covert Jay: HUTTAH!

Vinegar: One of the most exciting nights of the year, featuring the historic Massive Melee Match, the winner earns a World Title opportunity at next month's WrestleStock festival.

Lieberjosch: And this year for the first time ever, the Massive Melee will feature THIRTY participants.

Vinegar: Massive indeed, and tonight we also have three title matches scheduled, as well as what is sure to be a brutal grudge match between Phrixus Deimos and Zane Scott.

Covert Jay: So let's get right to the action!

The deep heartbeat bass of Taylor Swift’s “Look What You Made Me Do” drops over the arena’s public announce speakers as the artist Magdalena Lockheart emerges from behind the curtain. Magdalena steps out into the center of an emerald spotlight wearing a long black dress. For a moment she stands at the top of the stage and applies a dark cherry lipstick to her lips with the aid of a pocket mirror. The ramp in front of her lights up like a model’s runway. Lockheart struts down the ramp as if she’s modeling the dress, pausing briefly at the bottom to pose while flashbulbs go off all around her.

Mitchell Dennis: Standing at five feet three inches tall, and weighing in at one-hundred and eleven pounds; from Inwood, New York - She is the FUTURE, the artist known as MAGDALENA LOCKHEART!!!

Lockheart walks around the ring towards the camera side, moving all of the way to the southeast ringpost before pulling herself up onto the ring apron. She centers herself on the apron and stands facing the crowd.

But I got smarter, I got harder, In the knick of time.
And me I rose up from the dead I do it all the time.
I got a list of names, yours is in red underlined
I check it once, then I check it twice- Ooh!

Lockheart grabs her dress with both hands and on beat with the song, she rips the dress down the center! Another green spotlight shines straight down on her as glittering, sparkling confetti rains down from the ceiling onto the crowd. Flashes go off from all of the hungry cell phone cameras in attendance as Lockheart sheds the rest of her dress and reveals her slim waistline beneath. Lockheart pauses for a few moments to allow the crowd to snap more photographs before entering the ring.

Vinegar: Lockheart looks focused. She knows how important this match is.

Lieberjosch: She’s a smart young woman and she knows what winning the Cross-Hemisphere Championship will do for her young career.

Vinegar: Taking it off of a UGWC legend like Travis Pierce could be a career defining victory.

Lieberjosch: I wouldn’t go that far.

Vinegar: As far as what?

Lieberjosch: As to call Pierce a “legend”.

Vinegar: Will you stop!

Lieberjosch: Listen, if this was a Co-Operative Championship match, I’d agree with you. He’s a legendary Co-Operative Champion. He’s not a legendary Cross-Hemisphere Champion.

Vinegar: He’s a two-time Cross-Hemisphere Champion.

Lieberjosch: His first reign wasn’t even two months and this one has only been for two months. He was lucky to win it from Alan Wallace and he’s been lucky to keep it.

Covert Jay: So you’re saying that if Magdalena Lockheart wins it tonight that it doesn’t mean anything?

Lieberjosch: Not at all. I don’t agree with some of how Miss. Lockheart behaves, but she’s an incredible young talent and if she wins the championship from Pierce, that’s an accomplishment that she can hang her proverbial hat on.

Vinegar: You said that he’s not a legend.

Lieberjosch: He’s not as a Cross- Hemisphere Champion. That said, he’s still a decorated wrestler and a first rate athlete. If Miss. Lockheart beats him, that has to be a considered to be a major upset and a career- defining victory.

Vinegar: You’re obnoxiously confusing sometimes.

Lieberjosch: It’s not my fault that you can’t keep up with my dizzying intellect.

Vinegar: Good grief. Mitchell is ready to introduce the Cross-Hemisphere Champion.Thank god.

Mitchell Dennis: Ladies and gentlemen, introducing second…

Mitchell Dennis: He is the reigning and defending UGWC Cross- Hemisphere Champion...ladies and gentlemen, he is the “Icon of Entertainment” and “King of Charisma”...TRAVIS PIEERRRRCEE!!!!

Pyros explode on the opening rifts of the song, and as the music softens Travis Pierce comes out from backstage and walks to the ring.


Vinegar: From the look on Pierce’s face, Lockheart might have the hardest challenge of her career ahead of her.

Lieberjosch: Maybe. She looks equally as determined, so I wouldn’t be surprised to see an upset tonight.

Vinegar: Brian Chartreuse just took the Cross-Hemisphere Championship from Pierce and held it up for everyone to see. As he does it, Pierce stands in his corner and stares at Lockheart. Her eyes are firmly affixed on the Championship.

Covert Jay: Dramatic.

Lieberjosch: It is, even if you’re incapable of expressing it with polysyllabic verbiage.

Covert Jay: Asshole says “what”?

Lieberjosch: What?

Covert Jay: Exactly.

Vinegar: Gentlemen, if you would…

Lieberjosch: Quite right. Miss Lockheart has not taken her eyes off of the Championship, which will be her first here if she wins it.

Vinegar: Chartreuse finishes showing the Championship to the entire arena and walks over to hand it to our time keeper, Claude de Rhombus.

Covert Jay: He has a funny name. “Rhombus”.

Lieberjosch: It’s a shape, you imbecile.

Covert Jay: I was never good at math.

Lieberjosch: Or shapes, it seems.

Vinegar: HEY!!! Turn around, Brian!!

Covert Jay: Ninja strike!

Lieberjosch: Pierce isn’t wasting any time.

Vinegar: “Not taking any time?” He’s taking a blatant cheap shot while Sam’s back is turned!

Lieberjosch: It’s more than one shot. Lockheart shouldn’t have taken her eyes off of him for so long. That mistake shows her inexperience.

Vinegar: He took a cheap shot! Stop sugar coating it!

Covert Jay: I like sugar. It makes things taste good.

Lieberjosch: Thanks, Jay. That was insightful as always.

Vinegar: Regardless, what Pierce is doing is not “sweet” and it he is taking a cheap shot, whether you admit it or not.

Lieberjosch: You may consider it a cheap shot, but whether that’s true or not, his blitz clothesline has her down on the mat and he’s shown his veteran savvy by keeping her down with all of the stomps that he’s laying into her.

Vinegar: I’m not arguing with the results, I’m contesting the tactic. He should be better than this.

Lieberjosch: He should be better than to get an early advantage? That makes no sense. Ms. Lockheart is faster and more agile than he is and it makes perfect sense for him to want to slow her down.

Vinegar: He’s not attacking her legs. He’s just stomping her mercilessly.

Lieberjosch: Sore ribs work just as well. It’s hard to run and hard to fly through the air when you can’t constrict your rib muscles enough to breathe.

Vinegar: Chartreuse just turned and saw Pierce stomping away at Lockheart. He’s put himself between them and is pushing Pierce back as he admonishes him.

Lieberjosch: Just let them go, Brian. Stop interfering.

Vinegar: “Interfering”?! He’s doing his job!

Lieberjosch: The match hasn’t technically started yet.

Vinegar: Pierce just shoved him away and has resumed his attack on Lockheart! He should be disqualified!

Lieberjosch: The match hasn’t started. He can’t be disqualified.

Covert Jay: Pierce seems angry.

Lieberjosch: He wants to be taken seriously again. He hates being treated like a joke.

Vinegar: This isn’t the way.

Lieberjosch: Defending it at a pay-per-view isn’t the way?

Vinegar: You know what I mean.

Lieberjosch: Of course I do, I just want to point out the absurdity if your position.

Vinegar: Whatever. Brian had better get it under control.

Lieberjosch: It looks like he is. Or at least that Pierce is pretending to pay attention to him now that he’s softened Ms. Lockheart up a bit.

Covert Jay: This can’t make Lucy Wylde happy.

Lieberjosch: That’s hardly relevant.

Vinegar: Pierce is checking on Magdalena in her corner. She’s insisting that she can continue.

Lieberjosch: She’s foolish. He not only has the size and weight advantage on her, but now he’s fresh and she’s vulnerable.

Vinegar: She’s a fierce competitor. She wants to win.

Covert Jay: “Fierce” rhymes with “Pierce”. Maybe it’s a sign.

Lieberjosch: “Stop” is a sign, too.

Covert Jay: Yeah, but it doesn’t rhyme with “Pierce”.

Lieberjosch: No. It doesn’t. How good of you to notice.

Vinegar: As you two were bickering, Brian called for the bell after Lockheart insisted that she was ready to go.

Lieberjosch: That may end up being a foolish decision on her part.

Vinegar: Pierce is back on the attack.

Covert Jay: That rhymes!

Vinegar: Thanks, Jay. As I was saying, Pierce immediately goes back on the attack as the second that Referee Brian Chartreuse calls for the bell, he kicks Lockheart in the ribs. She doubles over, Pierce grabs her, hoists her up…

Lieberjosch: Nice gutbuster across the knee. Pierce is going right back after the ribs that he’d already worked over.
Vinegar: Lockheart lets out a gasp of pain and winces. Pierce shifts his hands, one to her shoulders and the other to her lower back and exerts pressure on both, which forces her mid section to carry the full brunt of her weight across his knee.

Lieberjosch: That’s a smart strategy early on. He can slow her down from inability to breathe and then go to work on neutralizing one of her legs so that she can’t execute her curb stomp.

Vinegar: He can’t forget that she has multiple ways to end a match, not just the curb stomp.

Lieberjosch: That’s true, but all but one of them involve using her legs and the final one is a rear naked choke, which will put pressure on her ribs. If she can’t properly flex the muscles in her core or properly breathe because of it, that hold loses a lot of its effectiveness.

Vinegar: Those are all excellent points, Hans.

Lieberjosch: I know.

Vinegar: Nice “humble brag”.

Lieberjosch: You’re welcome.

Vinegar: Pierce continues to exert the pressure on her ribs as he pushes down on her lower back and shoulders. As he does this, he yells at her to submit.

Lieberjosch: She could submit and live to fight another day.

Vinegar: You know she’s not going to do that.

Lieberjosch: She’s young and foolish. I would expect no different from her.

Covert Jay: It would be impressive if Pierce retained the Cross- Hemisphere Championship in less than five minutes. He’d look like a lot less of a joke than he does now.

Lieberjosch: That commentary managed to be both incredibly insightful, at least for you, while also displaying an astounding lack of self-awareness.

Covert Jay: Thanks, Doc!

Vinegar: It boggles the mind sometimes.

Lieberjosch: If we could move on…

Vinegar: Pierce stands up and pulls up Lockheart with him, as he holds her laterally across his chest. He looks around the ring as if he’s searching for something…

Covert Jay: What? This isn’t a Chaos match.

Lieberjosch: I think we’re about to find out.

Covert Jay: Maybe he wants to up his cardio.

Lieberjosch: Maybe you should find another job.

Covert Jay: I like this one. I take pride in my work.

Lieberjosch: I find that hard to believe.

Vinegar: While you two were bantering, Pierce ran Lockheart back first onto the corner, then turned around and drove her down back first with a power slam.

Lieberjosch: You can’t fault his strategy.

Vinegar: Pierce looks down at the writhing Lockheart. He looks so smug. That smile tells me that he thinks this match is almost over.

Lieberjosch: Maybe it is.

Vinegar: Doubtful, Hans. Don’t you remember the “Four Corners of Doom” match that she had with Mizore Payne not too long ago?

Lieberjosch: I do.

Vinegar: So you remember that, but you think that this will be enough to keep her down for a three count?

Lieberjosch: Point taken. My counter point is that this is more methodical, as opposed to general punishment. It’s focused on her core, which will have a more rapid effect on her and her ability to fight.

Vinegar: I get your point, Hans. I just think that you’re wrong.

Lieberjosch: We’re about to find out.

Vinegar: Pierce places a single foot on her chest and makes sure to grind his heel in as he demands that Chartreuse counts the pin.
Lieberjosch: And Chartreuse momentarily looks confused by his demand. He wants you to count, idiot. It’s what you’re paid to do!

Vinegar: Settle down, Hans.

Lieberjosch: Why? He’s staring at her like an imbecile. If I wanted an imbecile to referee, I’d have hired Jay to do it while I was Creative Director.

Covert Jay: I’d love to be a referee! Maybe I should ask Creative Director Hastings.

Lieberjosch: N....well...it would get you away from me...

Vinegar: Chartreuse finally drops to the mat. He hammers out of quick one count…

Lieberjosch: Lockheart grabs Pierce’s ankle and rolls him up!

Vinegar: Chartreuse drops to the mat! There’s “one”! “Tw...”

Lieberjosch: Pierce kicks out, leaps to his feet and furiously yells at Chartreuse.

Vinegar: He doesn’t have time for that!

Lieberjosch: I agree. It gives Lockheart time to recover.

Vinegar: Lockheart darts backwards into the rope...she leans back into them….springs forward…

Covert Jay: Ninja dropkick!

Lieberjosch: Targeting his knee is smart. If she weakens it enough, he won’t be able to put enough force behind “The Truth Hurts”.

Vinegar: Pierce’s right knee hits the mat as Lockheart bounces off of the ropes again and comes back with another dropick to his knee that sends him over onto his side. She bounces off of the ropes again, leaps up and drives a third dropkick into the side of Pierce’s head!

Covert Jay: That impact made some sound!

Lieberjosch: Pierce shows his ring savvy by rolling from the ring to the outside.

Vinegar: Magdalena looks around for him. She sees him leaning against the ring apron. She charges across the ring, leaps up onto the turnbuckle...

Lieberjosch: Did you notice her briefly wince and grab at her waist as she got to the top?

Vinegar: I did.

Lieberjosch: His attacks have had an effect.

Vinegar: Some of one, anyway.

Covert Jay: Lockheart just leapt!

Vinegar: Pierce looks up as she comes down, arm extended!

Lieberjosch: “The Truth Hurts”! What a counter!

Vinegar: Pierce shows his veteran wiles and now both of them are down at ringside.

Lieberjosch: Chartreuse begins the count.

Vinegar: You have to believe that didn’t feel too good for Pierce.

Lieberjosch: Probably not, but it felt worse for Lockheart.

Vinegar: Chartreuse is up to five and Pierce is up to his feet. He flexes his legs a few times to try and loosen them up, then walks over to the still fallen Lockheart. He pulls her up and tosses her into the ring between the second and third ropes, which if you ask me isn’t necessary.

Lieberjosch: It was a smart move. She landed hard on her ribs.

Vinegar: It shows a certain lack of respect, I think.

Lieberjosch: He doesn’t have to respect her. He has to beat her. This is another way to help ensure that.

Vinegar: You know he did it to try and humiliate her.

Lieberjosch: That works too. You can’t fault him for employing match psychology.

Vinegar: It’s not “match psychology”. It’s disrespect.

Lieberjosch: He doesn’t have to respect her. She hasn’t beaten him.

Vinegar: Even if she does, he won’t respect her. He’ll just come up with an insulting excuse.

Covert Jay: Pierce is back in the ring.

Vinegar: He walks over to Lockheart and drops to the mat in a rather...arrogant cover.

Lieberjosch: She looks out of it to me. Chartreuse could probably count to one hundred and she wouldn’t move.

Covert Jay: He only has to count to three.

Lieberjosch: Very good, Jay.

Vinegar: In this case it only got him a two as Lockheart’s right arm shoots up.

Covert Jay: Pierce looks genuinely surprised by it.

Lieberjosch: He does. Yelling at Chartreuse isn’t going to help. That time the count was hardly an issue.

Vinegar: Pierce had better keep his focus. Every second he wastes yelling at Brian, gives Lockheart more time to recover.

Lieberjosch: He knows that, too.

Vinegar: Pierce bends over and pulls Lockheart up. She winces, which draws a cruel smile from Pierce. He grabs her by her waist, pulls her up for a vertical suplex...

Lieberjosch: That was a nice looking move.

Vinegar: Modifying the snap suplex into that stomach first slam was effective. We could both hear the air woosh out of her when she landed and she’s clearly in pain as she rolls onto her back on the mat.

Covert Jay: Pierce just looked at the nearest turnbuckle.

Lieberjosch: Could we be seeing “The Piercing Blow”?

Vinegar: Perhaps. If he lands that, it might only be a matter of time.

Lieberjosh: Too true, Nicholas.

Vinegar: The knee that Lockheart attacked doesn’t seem to be bothering him.

Lieberjosch: She didn’t do enough to weaken it.

Vinegar: Pierce leaps up onto the turnbuckle and signals for “The Piercing Blow” before he gestures that it’s over.

Covert Jay: Air Pierce!

Vinegar: No! Lockheart is back to her feet! She runs to the corner and yanks his legs out from under him!

Lieberjosch: Pierce just got crotched on the top rope and while I don’t particularly like the guy, as a fellow man, I can sympathize.

Vinegar: Lockhart grabs Pierce’s right leg and wraps it through the rope. She leaps up and drives a palm strike into Pierce’s chin, which stuns him. She back up a few steps, then leaps forward...

Lieberjosch: That was dirty.

Vinegar: How? She kicked him in the side of his trapped knee. What was cheap about that?

Lieberjosch: He couldn’t defend himself.

Vinegar: And?

Lieberjosch: Doesn’t she want to win fairly?

Vinegar: Give it a rest, Hans. If Pierce had done that, you’d be applauding him.

Lieberjosch: Probably.

Vinegar: What’s the difference between the two, other than the obvious?

Lieberjosch: He’s a veteran champion fighting to keep a championship that he cherishes. She’s a disrespectful upstart who doesn’t deserve this chance.

Vinegar: I think she more than earned it in the “Four Corners of Doom” match and has done nothing but win since then.

Lieberjosch: We see event differently.

Covert Jay: I think you’re both right.

Lieberjosch: You’re an idiot. We can’t both be right.

Vinegar: Lockheart backs up and then lunges forward and kicks the knee a second time, and a third…

Lieberjosch: She doesn’t seem like she’s about to stop.

Vinegar: She’s teeing off on him with repeated strikes to his right knee. Pierce is struggling and twisting to try and free himself, but it’s not helping.

Lieberjosch: As much as I want to fault her for it, it’s a good strategy.

Vinegar: She lands one more stiff kick to the side of Pierce’s knee, then takes a step back, grabs, the top rope and leaps up…

Covert Jay: Ninja enziguri!

Lieberjosch: Pierce just fell off the turnbuckle. That looked like a hell of a hard landing on the floor at ringside.

Vinegar: It was and this time Lockheart slides from the ring instead of leaping from it.

Lieberjosch: Apparently she can learn.

Vinegar: Would you come off of it, Hans. She’s an incredibly talented young woman and she’s obviously smart. She walks over to Pierce, who landed hard and might have tweaked that knee and possibly his ankle.

Lieberjosch: Given the way his knee twisted when he landed, I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s legitimately hurt.

Vinegar: Lockheart appears to realize it as she walks over to Pierce, who is struggling to get to his feet. She grabs his leg, yanks it up and slams it down hard on the ring steps. Pierce recoils and staggers back into the railing. Lockheart follows him. She grabs his leg, drives a quick palm strike into his chin and then pulls his leg over the railing and wraps it into it. She backs up a few steps and smiles at Pierce.

Lieberjosch: He knows that this could change the entire match.

Vinegar: He’s begging off. A few minutes ago he was smug. Now he’s actually begging off.

Lieberjosch: He’s trying to distract her enough to free himself. She’d better hurry up, or they could both be counted out.

Vinegar: Chartreuse was counting, but he stopped and he’s telling her to bring it back into the ring. Lockheart nods her head at him, then looks at Pierce, who looks horrified at what she’s about to do.

Lieberjosch: He’ll be even more terrified if she does it!

Fans: Ohhhh!!!!

Vinegar: She did it. She just dropkicked his trapped leg!

Lieberjosch: The bright side of this for Pierce is that it freed him from the railing.

Covert Jay: What’s the dark side?

Lieberjosch: You just saw Magdalena Lockheart execute “the dark part”, as you so ineloquently put it.

Vinegar: Lockheart grabs Pierce and drags him to the ring on a leg that is having a hard time carrying his weight. She rolls him in and quickly follows behind.

Lieberjosch: She’s not wasting any time following up.

Vinegar: No she isn’t. As soon as she rolled in, she drove a quick knee into his ribs. She follows it with a second one, this one to the side of his injured knee. She jumps back to her feet, runs backwards and bounces off of the ropes.

Covert Jay: Another dropkick to his injured knee.

Lieberjosch: Everyone heard that howl of pain from Pierce, but if you noticed, she winced when she landed on her back and was a little slow in getting up. His earlier assault on her ribs did more damage than we thought it did.

Vinegar: It looks that way. Lockheart backs up a few steps as Pierce rolls over onto his hands and knees before his right leg fails on him. She smiles, then explodes forward and leaps up.

Lieberjosch: If she lands this, Pierce could be finished. Granted, this strikes me more as a move done out of convenience, not out a desired intent to finish him now. She’s just taking advantage of an opening.

Vinegar: I agree, Hans.

Covert Jay: “Lacrimosa”!

Lieberjosch: Pierce’s head spiked violently into the mat!

Vinegar: Lockheart is having a little trouble turning Pierce over now that he’s nothing but dead weight.

Lieberjosch: The size and weight difference were always her biggest disadvantage in this match.

Vinegar: She finally pushes him over.

Lieberjosch: Yes, but she staggered back afterward and had to lean against the ropes as she put her arm across her midsection. I’d be willing to bet that she has bruised ribs right now.

Vinegar: You might be right, Hans. It does appear as if she does.

Covert Jay: This hasn’t been an overtly violent match.

Vinegar: Not in the way that we might have expected. Both of them came in with a game plan and have followed it.

Lieberjosch: Her “game plan” had better include pinning Pierce right now.

Vinegar: Lockheart staggers over to the prone body of Pierce and gingerly covers him.

Lieberjosch: She’s clearly protecting those ribs.

Vinegar: Chartreuse is down to execute the count.

Lieberjosch: There’s the “one”.

Covert Jay: Two!

Fans: The...ohhhhh!!

Vinegar: Pierce kicked out, but only barely.

Lieberjosch: Lockheart went to cover him again, but Pierce flagged Chartreuse over.

Vinegar: This is just a distraction.

Lieberjosch: Perhaps. Or perhaps his leg is legitimately injured.

Vinegar: Chartreuse instructs Lockheart to back up to the opposite corner while he checks on Pierce, which she does, although it’s clearly with great reticence.

Lieberjosch: Pierce is an experienced veteran. He knows that if this does nothing else, it interrupts Lockheart’s momentum.

Vinegar: Chartreuse checks on Pierce, who appears to be explaining that his knee is legitimately injured. Meanwhile, Lockheart paces back and forth in her corner.

Lieberjosch: It’s great psychology by Pierce against his younger and less experienced opponent.

Vinegar: It’s having at least some effect, because Lockheart hasn’t taken her eyes off of him.

Lieberjosch: She has to keep that under control. If she gives Pierce an opening, he’ll take it. This match is far too important for her to lose because she let her emotions get the better of her.

Vinegar: Chartreuse is finally finishes with Pierce and he signals to Lockheart that the match is going to continue. Lockheart explodes out of her corner and moves across the ring with a speed that clearly takes Pierce off guard. I can’t say that I blame him. Lockheart gets about three steps from him and leaps. It looks like she’s going for a flying forearm smash.

Fans:OHHH!!! BOOOO!!!!

Vinegar: That son of a bitch!

Lieberjosch: That’s one way to swing the momentum in his favor.

Vinegar: He pulled Chartreuse in front of him so that he took the entire brunt of her landing!

Lieberjosch: Nonsense! He was trying to pull Chartreuse out of the way!

Covert Jay: I didn’t see that, Doc.

Lieberjosch: Then you’re both stupid and blind.

Vinegar: Come on, Hans! Give us a break! Pierce just clearly pulled Brian Chartreuse in front of him!

Lieberjosch: I didn’t see it that way.

Vinegar: That’s because you didn’t want to! Now both Chartreuse and Lockheart are down. Where the hell is Pierce going?

Lieberjosch: Outside of the ring by the look of it.

Vinegar: He just walked over and shoved Claude out of his chair, then took it! He slides it back into the ring and follows after it, then picks it up. He pulls Lockheart out of the corner, yanks her to her feet and then drives the headrest of the chair into her ribs. She doubles over and Pierce brings it down across her back and then looks over at Chartreuse, who is still down in the corner. He turns and smiles at Lockheart, who is slowly rising to her feet after that chair to the back took her to her knees.

Lieberjosch: Lockheart is back to her feet…

Fans: OHHHH!!!!!

Vinegar: PRICK!!!

Lieberjosch: Damn! Even I feel bad for her after that!

Vinegar: That bastard almost took her head off and now he disposes of the chair and looks over at Chartreuse, who’s beginning to stir in the corner. He smiles evilly and kicks the chair from the ring.

Lieberjosch: He might have just saved his championship with that.

Vinegar: You mean that he might have stolen it.

Lieberjosch: He can’t steal something that’s already his.

Vinegar: You know what I mean, Hans. He might have stolen the win!

Lieberjosch: That isn’t what you said.

Vinegar: Stop being a pedantic asshole!

Lieberjosch: Nicholas! I’m hurt that you’d even suggest that!

Vinegar: Oh, blow it it out of your ass, Hans!

Lieberjosch: Wow! Settle down, Nicky!

Vinegar: Pierce grabs Chartreuse and roughly yanks him from the corner. He drags him from center ring and drops him in front of the crumpled Lockheart, then kicks her over onto her back.

Lieberjosch: This might be the most academic pinfall he ever counts.

Vinegar: Chartreuse drops into the pin. There’s the “one”! That prick is going to steal this match!

Lieberjosch: Two!

Fans: Three...NO!!!! HOLY SHIT!!

Covert Jay: Fuck me running...

Lieberjosch: How in the hell did she kick out of that??!!

Vinegar: Heart, Nick. Pure heart. Not to mention a little bit of anger and hate.

Lieberjosch: How could she hate Pierce?

Vinegar: Not towards him. You heard the promo she cut before this match, Miss. Lockheart is clearly out for blood against “The Court” and she’s not going to let Pierce get in her way.

Lieberjosch: Bah. That has nothing to do with Pierce.

Vinegar: I doubt she likes him too much after that cheap shot with the chair.

Lieberjosch: Bah. There’s no need to be petty about it.

Vinegar: “Petty”? That’s hardly petty. He’s trying to cheat her out of her first championship. I think she has plenty of reason to be angry at him for that.

Lieberjosch: Pierce has to keep on her.

Vinegar: He just yelled at her that she should stay down. I think I heard him yell the word “temerity” in there, too.

Lieberjosch: I didn’t know that he even knew that word. I have to say that I agree with him. She should respect him as the champion and stay down.

Vinegar: You’re in rare form tonight. That is one hell of a contrived justification of what he did.

Lieberjosch: I don’t think so. He has every right to expect her to stay down. It’s “Champion’s Prerogative”.

Vinegar: That’s not what that means and you know it!

Lieberjosch: It means whatever Pierce wants it to mean. Speaking of which, he just picked up Lockheart and threw her from the ring.

Vinegar: He slides out after her and briefly stumbles, but manages to roughly yank her to her feet. He pulls her up and drops her stomach first across the guard rail before his leg gives out and he stumbles back into the side of the ring.

Lieberjosch: If he can roll her in, he can finish this. She’s still hung up over the railing.

Vinegar: Pierce gets back to his feet and staggers over to the railing. He drives two quick forearms into her back, then pulls her off it, hooks an arm around her neck, spins around…

Covert Jay: Suplex into the railing! Her back just slammed into the railing hard!

Lieberjosch: Pierce is staying on his game plan.

Vinegar: He pulls her from the floor, drags her over to the ring and somehow gets her up onto the apron. He slides in after her and signals for “The Truth Hurts”. Will he be able to execute it on the bad leg? Should he even try it and risk hurting that knee even worse?

Lieberjosch: A champion does what he has to in order to win.

Vinegar: This is a big risk.

Lieberjosch: Perhaps, but it’s one he has to take.

Vinegar: Pierce pulls her up and whips her into the corner before he collapses to the mat, clutching at his knee while Lockheart bounces violently off of the post and collapses to the mat clutching at her back.

Lieberjosch: The next big move is going to decide the winner.

Vinegar: Both of them are trying their hardest to get to their feet as they use the ropes to slowly pull themselves up.

Lieberjosch: It’s slow going for both of them right now. Pierce is a little further up because he’s a bit taller, but this one is going to be close.

Vinegar: I agree, Hans. No matter who wins this match, they’ve put on a show that has the fans alternating between loud cheers and chants and absolute respectful silence. It’s been an unbelievable show of resilience and athleticism.

Lieberjosch: Pierce is the first to his feet, although he’s holding the top rope with his right arm. He has his eyes fixed on Lockheart.

Vinegar: Lockheart is upright and she glares across at Pierce. The two stagger from the ropes and then charge at each other. Pierce goes for a wild clothesline which Lockheart ducks.

Covert Jay: “Event Horizon”!

Vinegar: She connects with the discus elbow and back elbow combination but can’t follow up as her back seizes up on her! Pierce staggers back into the corner and shakes his head to clear it. He looks up and sees Lockheart clutching at her back. He extends his leg a few times to shake out the pain and then takes off out of the corner, although at a considerably slower pace than usual. He reaches Lockheart, leaps up for “The Truth Hurts”...

Covert Jay: Lockheart sidestepped it at the last second!

Vinegar: She kicks him on the inside of the bad knee and Pierce drops to the mat in agony. She pulls him up and it looks like she’s setting him up for the “Beat Rush”. The kick to the back of the knee connects, which sends Pierce down onto his good knee. She spins to throw the kick to the back of his head, but her back cramps up again and she staggers back into the ropes…

Lieberjosch: Pierce is up to his feet.

Covert Jay: No! His knee just gave out on him again and he falls to the mat!

Vinegar: Lockheart stretches her back and sees him get to his hands and knees. She smiles and leaps up… “Lacrimosa”!!!

Lieberjosch: I don’t think she got all of it, because she immediately fell back into the ropes clutching at her back.

Vinegar: I think you’re right, but Pierce is still down!

Lieberjosch: He doesn’t look out yet!

Vinegar: Lockheart sees him shake is head. She grits her teeth and leaps...

Covert Jay: ANOTHER “Lacrimosa”!

Vinegar: This time it looked like she got all of it!

Lieberjosch: If she did, we have a new Cross- Hemisphere Champion!!

Vinegar: She turns Pierce over and literally falls on top of him, exhausted!

Lieberjosch: Here’s Chartreuse with the count!

Fans: ONE!!!

Covert Jay: TWO!!!

Fans: THREE!!!!

Vinegar: She did it! Magalena Lockheart did it! She pinned Travis Pierce and is the NEW Cross- Hemisphere Champion!!!

Covert Jay: Listen to the thunderous applause from the fans!

Vinegar: I’m not surprised! These two just put on an incredible match!! This was a Pay-Per-View match on a “Synergy”!

Lieberjosch: I have to agree, Nick. They just put on a hell of a show and Ms. Lockheart is the new Cross- Hemisphere Champion with what could be a career defining victory!

Mitchell Dennis: Ladies and gentlemen, the WINNER and your NEW UGWC CROSS- HEMISPHERE CHAMPION….”The Future” MAGDALENA LOOOOCKHEARRRRT!!!!

Vinegar: Brian Chartreuse takes the Championship and lays it on Lockheart and raises her hand.

Lieberjosch: That was a hell of a start to “Massive Melee 2018”.

Vinegar: Yes it was! Phrixus Deimos takes on Zane Scott, no holds barred next. Will this put their months long feud to rest? We’ll find out, next!


Maggie Lockheart - 7.40

Travis Pierce 6.91

[DrunkenBuzzsaw]

Vinegar: "We just witnessed one hell of a battle for the UGWC Cross-Hemisphere Championship, and in a match that could have gone either way at any given moment, it was Magdalena Lockheart that had her hand raised in victory here tonight, becoming the NEW Cross-Hemisphere Champion!"

Lieberjosch: "Travis Pierce is a legend in this industry, and a man who has been known to perform at his best, when the stage is the biggest. To beat a man like that, for a title that he had so much pride in holding, is a testament to how great of a wrestler Ms. Lockheart is."

Covert Jay: "HUTTAH!!"

Vinegar: "Not to mention everything that has gone on in recent weeks, Hans. Everything that has been on Maggie's mind lately, the fact that she was able to focus on her task at hand here tonight and pick up the victory, that says all that needs to be said about her status not only in this company, but in the entire industry."

Lieberjosch: "I could not agree more, Nicholas."

Covert Jay: "And from that, to the spectacle that we're about to witness? AND two more title matches? AND the Melee??? Fuck me, I'm dead. Tonight's gonna be great!"

Vinegar: "That spectacle that Jay just mentioned is a No Holds Barred match, featuring two men that know each other extremely well?"

Covert Jay: "You mean like how Mainstreamer liked to have known my boy Vain?"

Lieberjosch: "You, sir, are an idiot."

Vinegar: "No, Jay, that is not what I mean. And I feel dumber for you having asked that question."

Lieberjosch: "Phrixus Deimos have crossed paths numerous times over the years, but the last two months have really amped up things between the two of them."

Vinegar: "The animosity really kicked into high gear on the March 5th edition of UGWC Synergy, when after taking a Virus of Life onto the concrete floor backstage from Dave Rydell, then World Champion Zane Scott was hanged upside down by Phrixus Deimos, who offered 'The Personification of Pain' a word of warning."

Deimos reveals he is holding a chain, which he wraps around Zane’s legs and pulls on a lever that hoists Zane up and hangs him upside down a couple feet off the floor. Deimos gets down on a knee next to Zane, whose blood drips onto the floor.

Deimos: The Lord’s Enforcer, is that what you are now? A word of caution for you. Long before you were pain’s puppet, I was its mentor.

Deimos stands and walks away, pausing to glance through the window at Rydell laying in the shards of glass, before smirking and walking off, as officials rush to aid the World Champion.

Covert Jay: "Phrix struck first blood, so to speak, but Zane Scott got the last laugh, when just last week, he and 'Vain' Alan Wallace put both Phrixus Deimos and Jessica E. Mathis through tables, after their cooperative match."

Lieberjosch: "It's been quite some time since we saw either Vain or Zane stoop to those levels."

Vinegar: "You can say that again."

Hazel East finishes counting the three on Jessica Mathis. Alan Wallace rolls off of Mathis and onto his knees. He looks up at Zane, who has Deimos pinned in the corner by a forearm to the throat. The two men look at each other for the briefest of seconds before the nod at the same time and "Vain" rolls out of the ring. Deimos struggles against Zane but is brought to heel by a quick punch to his solar plexus. He turns and smiles as "Vain" slides a folding table into the ring and then disappears back under it again. Zane looks down at Mathis and sees her beginning to stir and is momentarily surprised as Deimos gives him a good shove, that knocks him back a few steps. Deimos makes a move for the ropes to escape, but only gets half way through the ropes when Zane catches his left wrist and yanks him back into the ring.

Deimos stumbles back through the ropes just as "Vain" slides a second table into the ring and then slides in after it. He gets to his feet just in time to see Zane roughly yank Deimos back into the ring and flatten him with "The Purge". Zane callously drops the inert body of Deimos back to the mat and turns just in time to see "Vain" pull Mathis up and hit her with the "Curtain Call". She crumples back to the mat and "Vain" nods his head and proceeds to set the first table up. Zane picks up Mathis and holds her limp form in his arms as "Vain" sets the table in place near center ring. As soon as he's done, Zane walks around to the front of the table as "Vain" steps out onto the apron. Zane turns and faces the table, then hoists Mathis up as if for "The Splatter Effect". "Vain" grabs the top rope, jumps up onto it and then springboards off of it and over Zane, who hoists Mathis up as if to elevate the powerbomb. "Vain" soars over Zane and Mathis and executes "The Money Maker" on her, which loudly drives her through the table and obliterates it.

"Vain" kips back up to his feet and immediately kicks Deimos in the head as he begins to stir. Zane nods at "Vain", then pushes the broken table and the equally broken Mathis into the corner before he sets up the second table. "Vain" walks to and ascends the opposite turnbuckle as Zane sets Deimos up onto the turnbuckle and drives a two handed sledge strike into his chest. He turns and faces center ring, then places Deimos in position for "The Poughkeepie Express". He looks at "Vain" and the two men nod again. Zane hoists Deimos up and throws him towards the table. "Vain" leaps off of the turnbuckle and catches him with a flying leg drop half way down that drives Deimos through the table in a loud explosion of shattered wood. "Vain" stands up as Zane steps out of the corner. The two men look at each fallen opponent, then they look at each other, shake hands and nod and exit the ring. They turn and look into the ring as "Pornstar Champion" blares through the arena. They both smile ever so slightly, then walk up the ramp and disappear backstage.

Covert Jay: "And it all will culminate here tonight, at Massive Melee!!!"

Vinegar: "That match is mere moments away, as Mitchell Dennis is in the ring, preparing to introduce the participants. Mitchell, take it away!"

Mitchell Dennis: "Ladies and Gentlemen, this match is scheduled for one fall, and is a NO HOLDS BARRED match! Introducing first…"

Mitchell Dennis: "He stands six-feet six-inches tall and weighs in at two-hundred fifty-five pounds… hailing from Poughkeepsie, New York… 'THE PERSONIFICATION OF PAIN' ZANE SCOTT!!!!!"

The lone guitar chord begins to reverberate through the dark arena. It's quickly joined by the drums, at which point white a silver strobe lights begin to alight the stage.

Nasty, nasty
Triple X rated

A loud tone that resembles a siren begins to scream through the arena, at which point the arena goes dark again.

Nasty, nasty
Justice, a waste-pit

The silver lights come back on, focused on Zane Scott, who stands on the stage. He looks out over the arena with a smile on his face and then focuses on the ring. The spotlights resume flashing around the stage as Zane looks at the ring.

Nasty, nasty
Deeper in the dirt
Nasty, nasty
Making bodies hurt

He raises the renamed "Lord of Pain-Thriller" overhead with his left hand and holds it there for a few seconds

Deep down!
Deep down!
Deeper down!

Zane lowers the chair and begins to walk to the ring. The lyrics continue to blare through the arena as he walks to the ring. Once he reaches the bottom of the ramp he slides the "Lord of Pain-Thriller" into the ring in the near corner then grabs the top rope and pulls himself up onto the apron with it. He waits on the apron for a few seconds, wipes his feet and then steps through the ropes and into the ring. He walks over to the corner, picks up the "Lord of Pain-Thriller" and ascends the near turnbuckle. He holds the chair up over his head for a few moments as his music continues to blare. After he drops from the turnbuckle, he walks to center ring and raises the "Lord of Pain-Thriller" overhead again before he allows the referee to check him for foreign objects. Once the referee is finished, the strobes stop, the lights go back up and Zane walks back to his corner and places his favored weapon in it, after which he turns around and stands with his arms folded in his corner to await the introduction of his opponent.

Vinegar: "The look on Zane's face right now is disturbing. Suffice to say, I don't think that he can wait to get his hands on Phrixus here tonight."

Lieberjosch: "Deimos has been around a long time, Nicholas. I'd be very surprised if he just came down to the ramp and got into the ring. I imagine he will attempt to get into Zane's head."

Covert Jay: "I highly doubt the Zane of 2018 will allow that to happen."

Lieberjosch: "Time will tell, Jay. Time will tell."

Mitchell Dennis: "And his opponent…"

Mitchell Dennis: "Standing five-feet eleven-inches tall and weighing in at two-hundred twenty pounds… hailing from Parts Unknown… 'THE EMBODIMENT OF FEAR' PHRIXUS DEIMOS!!!!!"

'Phucking Phreak' begins playing over the sound system, as a spotlight shines on the curtain that leads to backstage. The song plays for thirty seconds or so, before being shut off. The crowd looks around in confusion, as Zane Scott begins talking to Hazel East and motioning up the ramp.

Vinegar: "I'm being told that there was a production issue backstage, but that everyone is ready now."

Covert Jay: "The joys of being live, right Doc?"

Lieberjosch: "If you say so, Jay."

'Phucking Phreak' begins playing over the sound system again, as the spotlight shines on the backstage curtain once more. The song plays for almost an entire minute this time around, with no Deimos appearing on the stage. The crowd begins to boo, as Zane Scott walks over towards the ropes nearest the ramp, and begins motioning for Deimos to get his ass to the ring.

Vinegar: "I'm not quite sure what is going on right now, but the crowd here in Cleveland is not happy about it."

Covert Jay: "Neither is Zane Scott."

Vinegar: "Zane is incensed. He wants to get his hands on Phrix in the worst way."

Lieberjosch: "He's about to get his wish…"

Vinegar: "What in the hell?!"

Lieberjosch: "I told you."

Covert Jay: "Deimos just came through the crowd and slid in the ring behind Zane. He's eyeballing the 'Lord of Pain-Thriller'…"

Vinegar: "Deimos picking up Zane's weapon of choice , and he's making his move!"

Lieberjosch: "Deimos swinging that chair at the back of Zane's head…"

Covert Jay: "But Zane knew it was coming, and he just punched the chair, causing it to ricochet back into the face of Fear!"

Vinegar: "Zane grabs Deimos and lifts him high into the air… Splatter Effect!'

Covert Jay: "And he's making the cover! This could be the quickest match in UGWC history!"

Vinegar: "Zane covering Phrixus, but Hazel East is refusing to make the count."

Lieberjosch: "That is because this match hasn't officially started yet. Claude never rang the bell."

Covert Jay: "Hazel now has the unenviable task of explaining that to Zane Scott right now."

Lieberjosch: "Is… is he smiling at hearing the news?"

Vinegar: "Wouldn't surprise me, as it means he gets more time to administer punishment."

Lieberjosch: "Or take it."

Covert Jay: "It's Zane. I'm not sure he cares one way or another."

Vinegar: "Hazel admonishing Zane to return to his corner, while she checks on Phrix."

Covert Jay: "Deimos tried to get the drop on Zane by using his own weapon against him, and it backfired badly."

Lieberjosch: "Appears as if Zane was more prepared than I thought he would be. Kudos Mr. Scott."

Vinegar: "Deimos slowly making his way to his feet, telling Hazel that he's fine. She asks him again, and Fear just told her to have Claude ring the bell…"

Covert Jay: "And there goes de Rhombus! Ring the shit out of that bell, Claude!"

Lieberjosch: "The corner is holding Deimos up, and he just got steamrolled by Zane Scott with a vicious running avalanche."

Vinegar: "Zane hoists Fear up into the air, dropping him with a brainbuster. Zane with the cover!"

ONE!!!!!




TWO!!!!!




THR-KICK OUT!!!!!

Vinegar: "Deimos just able to kick out. And Zane is staying on him."

Lieberjosch: "Zane drags Phrixus to his feet, and connects with a high knee. He then shoves Deimos through the ropes, Fear landing hard on the concrete floor."

Covert Jay: "And Zane is following him to the outside."

Vinegar: "Zane dragging Fear to his feet, and proceeds to slam his head off the ring apron. He lifts him into the air high above his head… snake eyes onto the steel guardrail."

Lieberjosch: "Zane staying on the attack now, pulling Phrixus back to his feet, and Irish whipping him into the guardrail, Deimos' lower back taking the full brunt of that punishment."

Vinegar: "Zane attempting to bounce Phrixus' head off the steel ring post now, but Fear somehow blocks in, and then connects with a punch to the abdomen of Scott."

Covert Jay: "Straight kick to the right knee of Zane stops his momentum, and Fear just did what Zane failed to do, by ramming Zane's head into the ring post."

Lieberjosch: "Both men fall to the floor, and Fear really needs to get some momentum going. Zane has been absolutely all over him since before this match even started."

Vinegar: "Deimos half under the ring, having rolled into that position after hitting the floor, due to the momentum generated from ramming Zane's head off that post."

Covert Jay: "And Zane is already up to a knee guys, and he's pissed."

Lieberjosch: "Zane shaking his head back and forth as he gets to his feet, and he's grabbed the legs of Deimos to jerk him out from under the ring."

Vinegar: "Deimos just shot a fire extinguisher into the face of Zane Scott!"

Covert Jay: "So that is what he was doing under there?!"

Vinegar: "Zane stumbling around blindly now, trying to wipe that foam from his eyes."

Lieberjosch: "Zane doesn't see Deimos get to his feet, and he just slammed that fire extinguisher into the side of Zane's head. And Zane Scott hit the ground like a ton of bricks."

Vinegar: "Deimos dragging Zane to his feet and rolling him into the ring. And Phrix slides in after him."

Covert Jay: "Deimos makes the cover!"

ONE!!!!!




TWO!!!!!




THRE-NOOOOOOO!!!!!

Vinegar: "Zane Scott able to get his shoulder off the mat at the last possible second, but he still can't see anything guys."

Lieberjosch: "It's going to be hard to hit something you can't see."

Covert Jay: "That's why you're the doc, Doc."

Lieberjosch: "Hush."

Vinegar: "Deimos pulling Zane to his feet, as Zane begins swinging wildly, trying to hit anything that he can."

Lieberjosch: Deimos grabs the right leg of Zane and just stands there holding it, wild dodging the right and left hands from Zane Scott."

Covert Jay: "Dragonscrew legwhip executed by Fear, and Zane clutches at that knee, forgetting about his eyes momentarily."

Vinegar: "Deimos grabbing that leg of Zane and tucking it under his arm, and he just drove the foot into that mat at an awkward angle."

Covert Jay: "Kinda looked like a DDT. To Zane's foot."

Vinegar: "Whatever it was, it looked like it hurt."

Lieberjosch: "Fear dragging Zane back to his feet once more, hoisting him up onto his shoulder. He slams Zanes lower back into that top turnbuckle."

Vinegar: "And now he's hanging Zane upside down in the corner."

Covert Jay: "TREE OF WOE!"

Vinegar: "That right foot is wedged tight under the top rope, and you know that is putting even more pressure onto that knee of Zane Scott."

Lieberjosch: "I have a feeling it is about to get worse."

Covert Jay: "Deimos out of the ring now, looking under the ring once more, and he's pulled out a huge logging chain."

Vinegar: "Climbing up onto the ring apron, he steps back through the ropes, and is wrapping that chain around his fist."

Lieberjosch: "Fear is now pummeling that knee with punches, Zane doing his best to swat at Deimos to no avail."

Vinegar: "Deimos now driving his foot into the throat of Zane Scott, as he continues pounding away at that knee of Zane."

Covert Jay: "Deimos now stopping the attack and is sliding out to the floor. He's unwrapped that chain from his fist, and is using it to choke Zane Scott as he rears back as far as he can."

Vinegar: "He's using his foot against the ring post for additional leverage. This is a much more savage Phrixus Deimos than we have seen in a long, long time."

Lieberjosch: "He knows it will take anything and everything to keep Zane Scott down for a count of three."

Vinegar: "Deimos sliding back into the ring now, freeing Zane from the Tree of-"

Covert Jay: "WOE!!!"

Vinegar: "Pulling Zane to his feet, he lifts him up… Numbing!"

Lieberjosch: "And the cover!"

ONE!!!!!




TWO!!!!!




THREE-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Vinegar: "How… how in the hell did Zane kick out?"

Covert Jay: "I don't even think Zane knows. But he kicked out."

Vinegar: "Deimos pulling Zane back to his feet, holding him up as he begins jawing at him…"

Covert Jay: "And Fear just got punched straight in the face."

Lieberjosch: "Deimos shaking it off, going for a right hand of his own, but Zane ducked it."

Covert Jay: "Rear naked choked applied by Zane, and he's just dropped to the mat, and he's grapevined his legs."

Vinegar: "Deimos frantically looking for a way out, rolling to the side."

Lieberjosch: "And Deimos just managed to get his top leg free, and he's thrown it over the crossed feet of Zane and rolled back the other way."

Vinegar: "Vicious anklelock counter, and Zane is in serious agony. There's already been damage done to that knee, this can't be helping matters to also have that same ankle targeted."

Lieberjosch: "Zane able to grab the ropes, but it's No Holds Barred. Deimos doesn't have to break the hold."

Covert Jay: "But he did. What the fuck, Phrix?"

Vinegar: "Deimos might be a bit more vicious here tonight than he usually is, but he's still Phrixus Deimos. He won't take those types of shortcuts."

Lieberjosch: "Shortcuts? It's a No Holds Barred match."

Covert Jay: "Yeah, what Doc said."

Vinegar: "Zane dragging himself to the corner, and using the ropes to try and drag himself to his feet."

Lieberjosch: "Deimos just watching Zane, slowly stalking him, allowing Zane to exert all the energy he has to."

Covert Jay: "Zane to his feet, and eats European Uppercut that damn near knocks him off his feet. Were it not for Zane being in the corner, he'd be flat on his back right now."

Vinegar: "Deimos back to the adjacent corner, and comes at Zane full speed…"

Covert Jay: Uranage slam from out of nowhere by Zane Scott, and Fear landed on the back of his head!"

Vinegar: "Zane doing his best to shake out his leg, trying to get his knee feeling well enough to finish things off here in this match, and Phrix is slowly getting back to his feet again."

Lieberjosch: "Deimos coming towards Zane and looks to be going for a spear, but Zane is able to get out of the way, and Fear goes through the ropes, his shoulder crashing against the post."

Vinegar: "Zane still using the ropes to hold himself up, his vision still most likely slightly blurry, but well enough to see at least."

Covert Jay: "Deimos holding his shoulder as he stumbles out of the corner… ace cutter from Zane!"

Lieberjosch: "And the cover!"

ONE!!!!!




TWO!!!!!




THR-KICK OUT!!!!!

Vinegar: "Kick out by Deimos, as Zane holds at his knee while he slams his fist on the mat."

Covert Jay: "Zane slowly getting to his feet, trying to pull Deimos to his… Phrix with a kick to the gut, and then a swinging neckbreaker."

Lieberjosch: "Zane flat on his back and in the drop zone… Deimos heading out to the apron and climbing slowly to the top rope."

Vinegar: "Deimos takes flight with the Meteor Press…"

Covert Jay: "Zane got his knees up!"

Lieberjosch: "Yes, and I don't know who took the brunt of that move."

Vinegar: "Both men writhing in pain. You have to think that the first person that can get to their feet might have the advantage."

Lieberjosch: "I'm not even sure Zane will be able to stand after that."

Vinegar: "You also have to wonder how much either will have left for the Melee later on tonight."

Covert Jay: "Yeah, Chad kinda forgot about that."

Vinegar: "Are we sure he quit drinking?"

Covert Jay: "I think that's his problem."

Lieberjosch: "Both men back to their feet… headbutt from Zane finds its mark to the nose of Deimos."

Vinegar: "Enziguri from Deimos, and the force knocks Zane through the ropes. Deimos off the far ropes and going for a plancha, but Zane moves."

Covert Jay: "Deimos hit the floor hard, but Zane is hoisting him back up…"

Vinegar: "Powerbomb through the Ghanaian Announce Table!"

Lieberjosch: "That knee is giving Zane fits though, Nicholas. To be honest, I'm not even sure how he managed to lift him up."

Vinegar: "Neither do I, but the fact remains that he did, and now he is dragging the prone body of Phrixus Deimos out of that splintered announce table."

Covert Jay: "Zane rolling him back into the ring, and then slowly rolling in behind him."

Lieberjosch: "Zane should be going for the cover right now."

Vinegar: "I agree, but maybe he thinks it won't be enough to keep Deimos down."

Lieberjosch: "Zane dragging Deimos to his feet, and then tosses Deimos into the air… Murderous Intent!"

Covert Jay: "That should be enough to keep Fear down."

Vinegar: "Zane falls into the cover, and Hazel East makes the count."

ONE!!!!!




TWO!!!!!




THREE!!!!!

Mitchell Dennis: "The winner of this match… ZAAAANNEEEEE SCOTTTTTTT!!!!!"

Vinegar: "Zane somehow withstood the onslaught from Phrixus Deimos as Fear targeted that knee, and he reigns supreme in their war here tonight."

Lieberjosch: "But the question remains… how much did this match take out of both men, as they prepare for the Melee match later tonight?

Covert Jay: "I think the bigger question is… will Edie talk to me tonight?"

Lieberjosch: "What does that have to do with what we just witnessed?"

Covert Jay: "Not a damn thing, but the Co-Op Title Match is next!"

Vinegar: "The #CoolKids defend their UGWC Cooperative Titles against The Court, in just a few moments!"


Zane Scott - 7.22

Phrixus Deimos - 7.09

[DrunkenBuzzsaw]

Vinegar: Our next match here tonight is the culmination of a war that’s been raging since Lord of Trios!

Lieberjosch: The Court and The #CoolKids, or more specifically, Jet Somers and Eden Morgan vs Roxy Cotton and Angelica Vaughn.

Vinegar: Let’s take you back to the moment that set this feud into motion:

Vinegar: It would seem The Serpent is about to administer another dose of venom as he climbs up behind Angie on the apron.

Eden smirks, but as she turns back to Mili, she eats a vicious kick from the mat. Eden stumbles away, holding her busted lip as she goes to tag in Jet. Mili sees Baal in her corner and rushes over to help her partner before she suffers the same fate as Roxy. She slows as she sees the 7 foot angel of death rise up behind him. Her eyes go wide as Maxine swings, but Gabriel senses it at the last second, and ducks. Her punch goes wild and decks Milisandre right in the face, stunning her.



Covert Jay: DAS BOOT! JET JUST HIT NATHAN KORPI’S FINISHER ON MILISANDRE!



Crowthorne goes down, and Somers slides in for the cover.



1…



2…



3!!!



As The Court regroups on their side, encouraging Dennis into the ring, the #CoolKids are falling apart. Mili is out in the ring, Roxy is unconscious on the floor, and Angie has her head down on the apron, pounding it in frustration. Medics are beginning to come out to check on Roxy, and Angie heps Mili out of the ring as they make their retreat.

Covert Jay: Shenanigans!!

Vinegar: #CoolKids certainly thought so. For weeks the final of the tournament was hotly debated. The tide turned against The Court, however, at No Holds Barred, when the Cooperative Championships Gabriel and Eden had spent their Lord of Trios win earning would be taken away Roxy and Angie.

Lieberjosch: You’ve got a slanted view of history, Nick. The titles were gifted to them by Alan Wallace in an effort to get himself alone with Eden so he could perform a heinous act of malice that has yet to be redressed.

Covert Jay: However it happened, guys, Gabriel has traded places with Jet after Jet failed to score the World Championship, and as he makes his way toward Lucy Wylde, Jet and Eden have earned the opportunity to reclaim Cooperative gold for the Court, right now!

Dennis: The following contest is for one fall, and is for the Unified Global Wrestling Coalition Cooperative Championships!!

The lights in the arena flicker and then drop as hunting horns call over the speakers, the intro to "The Devil and the Daughter" sounding. An image emerges from the blackness of the GlobalTron:

The lights begin to flicker as one lone horn trails off to be joined with the sound of chains clanking together, hooded figures crouched and lining the ramp, each of them shaking what looks to be an offering cup, coins rattling inside rhythmically with the music. A steady drumbeat joins in, the cups shaking faster and faster until they're a staccato rhythm and the long, lone horn trails once more. The lights flicker wildly and then drop again, coming back up almost instantly as the song hits full force, two hooded figures, each wearing their own rendition of an owl mask standing at the entryway. As one, they raise their heads and move forward down the ramp with a steady, determined stride. As they pass, the crouched, hooded figures hide their faces or flee. The two split as they come to the ring, each standing at the base of a set of steps, one foot on the bottom step. The horns sound alone again, the lights flickering until the long, lone horn sounds, the music hitting once more as they continue their ascent up the steps and into the ring. The two put their backs to the center of the ring and each other, each facing a corner as they lift the masks from their faces to reveal Eden Morgan and Jet Somers.

Dennis: Introducing first, with a combined weight of 304 pounds, representing The Court, JEEEEEEEEEET SOMMMMMERS and EDDDDDDEN MORRRRGAN!!!

Vinegar: Jet and Eden have spent the last four weeks perpetrating a non-ending smear campaign against the #CoolKids.

Lieberjosch: Project Q.U.I.M. and the C.U.N.T. Telethon are public services, Nick. How can you disparage the charitable work they’ve done?

Vinegar: Oh please…

Covert Jay: I just hope someone has been able to get those poor cats out of that nightmare house.

 

As "Paparazzi" by Lady GaGa plays, purple strobe lighting pulsates through the arena. Roxy makes the crowd wait a few eager moments before emerging from behind the entrance curtain with her statuesque bodyguard Maxine just behind her, looming. She carries one half of the UGWC Cooperative Championships on her shoulder.

Taking a second to stand at the top of the entrance ramp, Roxy pulls her Gucci sunglasses down her nose enough to look over them and around at the rowdy crowd. She leans over at the waist with her hand on her hip, exaggeratedly looking from left to right and then back again before standing up straight and strutting toward the ring, blowing kisses to everyone around her along the way. She pauses about halfway down.

Angelica Vaughn steps out to a tremendous pop, wearing the other Cooperative Championship around her waist. She joins up with Roxy at mid-ramp, and they hug before they walk toward the ring and the purple strobe lights continue to swirl through the air, fans reach over the barricade attempting to touch them. Roxy deftly avoids any contact from them and shoots dirty looks at the ones who get closest, but Angie shakes a few hands.

Once in the ring, Roxy makes a slow, deliberate show of removing her various jewelry and sunglasses, handing them off the the referee as if she were tossing her keys to a valet driver. Roxy makes her way to her corner,tossing her hair back over her shoulders and soaking in all the flash bulbs popping around her. She raises her belt just as Angie raises her in the center of the ring.

Dennis: And their opponents, the your UGWC Cooperative Champions, with a combined weight of 260 pounds--

Covert Jay: Oooh… Mitchell is getting the look of death from both ladies over that announcement…

Dennis: Representing #CoolKids, ROXXXXXXY COTTTON AND ANGELLLLICA VAAAAAUGHN!!

Vinegar: Angie Vaughn joined the Synergy roster earlier this year, but Roxy is officially a part of Chill.

Lieberjosch: That is until she bit off more than she could chew with the Court!

Vinegar: I wouldn’t say that, especially considering No Holds Barred was only the first victory their team has enjoyed over them.1

Lieberjosch: Nevermind that they’ve gained these wins essentially every time by taking advantage of distractions and ringside mayhem.

Vinegar: Nevertheless, the #CoolKids are the Cooperative Champions, and it was the Court they dethroned to get there.

Roxy and Eden start off the action. They’re feeling each other out so far, each one throwing a testing kick here and there, the other easily dodging, ducking, or blocking. They eye one another carefully as they both move methodically around the ring, trying to get a measure. Roxy is the first to make a mistake, leaping for a Frankensteiner that Eden picks up on all too quickly. She connects with a powerbomb, covering Roxy for an early pin.







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2…









Covert Jay: Roxy kicks out!

Lieberjosch: Eden would like nothing more than to end the reign of the #CoolKids as quickly as possible.

She rolls up to her feet, wobbly at first, but steadying herself as Eden wades in for a more focused attack. She drives forearm after forearm into Roxy, backing her up against the ropes, then using an armdrag to pull her down to the mat and in for an armbar! Roxy tugs, getting the bottom rope in her grasp and bringing Sam Green over to break up the hold.

Roxy gets to her feet, and makes to sprint to the corner for a tag, but Eden chances a grab and catches a fistful of Roxy’s blonde hair, yanking back and pulling Roxy off her feet again. This time, Eden darts to her corner and tags in Jet.

Vinegar: The Court controlling this match so far!

Jet runs in, grabbing a fistful of hair himself, and is dragging Roxy to her feet when she gut-checks him out of nowhere! He stumbles back, and that gives her the room she needs for a side Russian legsweep, knocking him on his back!

Roxy stumbles to her corner and tags in Angie!

Covert Jay: Tag your partner, she’s fresh!

Lieberjosh: Did… did you just parody the Subway jingle?

Covert Jay: No.

As Jet is getting to his knees, Angie flies across the ring at him, driving a knee into his face and knocking him flat again. He attempts to get up once more, and she unleashes a barrage of YES kicks, finishing him off by turning around and mule kicking him right in the face!

Vinegar: Angie goes for the first cover for the #CoolKids!







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2…













Covert Jay: Jet kicks out, barely!

Vinegar: Angie pulls Jet to his feet, changing up her offense for a more technical approach.

She pulls him into a side-headlock and begins cranking his neck, fully controlling him as she twists. Jet claws at her arms, trying his best to dig his fingers in and create space. Just as he’s about to break free, Angie pulls him into a rear naked choke!!

Jet fights, kicking his legs as they fall to the mat. His kicks begin to weaken, and it looks like Angie’s going to choke him out!

Vinegar: We found out a couple months back how evenly matched these two are in style and speed, but it looks like Vaughn may edge Jet out here!

Arabian press from Eden breaks the hold!! She pauses for a moment to check on her partner, who took the brunt of the necessary attack, but he nods that he’s ok. Eden nods and scoots back to her corner with Green on her tail, admonishing her interruption.

Jet turns, hot from nearly being choked out, and grabs at Angie. She ducks, spinning around him and dropping down to pull him into a schoolboy pin. Jet rolls through, pulling Angie’s arm along and using his momentum to flip her onto her back. Angie wraps her legs around his head, bouncing it off the mat and rolling up into a kneeling position with Jet’s head pincered between her calf and thigh. Jet plants his hands and get his knees under him. He pushes forward at a crawl, knocking Angie off balance and releasing himself. Grabbing her arms, he wraps Angie up and locks in the KIMURA ARMBAR!!

Now it’s Angie’s turn to struggle, but Roxy is there for the quick save as she baseball slides into the Wild Card, freeing her partner. Just as quickly, she slides out of the ring and returns to her corner.

Vinegar: Look at the speed on Roxy! I don’t even think Sam saw her!

Jet and Angie are both worn from their exchange, but Jet manages to recover first. He yanks Angie up and hurls her toward the ropes, catching her on the return with a hip toss and sends her flying toward the other side of the ring!

Lieberjosch: Hot tag from Roxy brings her in as the legal woman!

She launches herself at Jet, hitting a V-trigger that sends him down stiff as a board! Roxy immediately pulls Jet into the WET DREAM! He’s pumping his legs, trying to get enough purchase to leverage himself out of the lock, but Roxy’s got it locked in tight!

Morgan into the ring, but, Angie saw her coming and meets her with a bicycle kick that stops her cold! She returns Eden’s earlier punishment of Roxy’s hair by using Eden’s to pull her to her feet, and hair-toss her through the ropes and out of the ring!!

Vinegar: The #CoolKids have this one!!

Angie turns to check on Roxy’s progress in submitting Jet, but he’s managed to pedal himself around to a position to kick Angie’s ankles out from under her! She tumbles over, piling into Roxy and breaking the hold. Jet shoots to his feet, aiming for the outstretched hand of Eden, but Roxy and Angie each grab an ankle and yank him back, letting him fall flat on his face!!

Lieberjosch: Jet is one of the most innovative fighters we’ve seen in UGWC, and that kept him from having to tap out, but there’s no established defense against dirty, double team fighting.

Green pushes Angie out of the ring, while Roxy moves to start climbing the turnbuckle. Jet gets up slowly, turning to look for his opponent. He looks up just in time to see Roxy leaping in a backward turn from the top as she goes for the Meteora… but Jet manages to catch her just as she’s about to connect! Thinking quickly, Roxy wraps her legs around his head, turning into a scissor lock as she falls away, dragging Jet down!

The two of them crash to the mat hard, spilling away in separate directions. Eden yells encouragement to Jet, trying to will him to get up; meanwhile, Angie engages the crowd, trying to get them chanting for Roxy’s recovery.

Vinegar: The crowd is getting amped up here!

They both begin to stir at about the same time, and as they each notice the other moving, they both dive toward their corners, tagging their partners in.

Angie and Eden rush at one another, Eden dropping down low to avoid a spinning kick from Vaughn. As she comes back up, Eden leaps and hits a double knee facebreaker on Angie! Vaughn bounces away, holding her jaw, but Eden is relentless! She punt kicks Angie, making her head spin as she pushes herself away from the Ice Queen. Eden crouches in the corner, waiting, and when Angie finally starts to get up, Eden runs…

Covert Jay: HIGH MAINTENANCE!!!

Lieberjosch: Eden with a cover!







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2…











3-NO!



Angie manages to weakly get a shoulder up mere seconds before Eden secured the win!! Eden, aggravated at the continued resilience of Vaughn, drags her to her feet and whips her into a corner. As Angie stumbles out of the corner, Eden goes for the OUROBOROS!

Vinegar: Eden staying on top of the match here…

She doesn’t quite get it locked in, however, as Cotton manages to sneak in and hit the MUFFDIVER!! Angie escapes the hold, and turns to capitalize, but here’s Jet with a CHOK!!

He turns and almost eats a clothesline, but Matrixes out of the way. As he comes back up, though, Roxy hits him with an elbow to the back of the head! She whips the dazed Opie into the corner, where he crumples. She turns and grabs Angie, then drags her over the body of Eden before rushing into the corner for a KITTY BUSTER on Jet!

Lieberjosch: Green needs to restore order to this match! The #CoolKids are just running amok with zero regard for rules or match structure.

Vinegar: Sam begins the count:







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2…









3!!



Covert Jay: WAIT! Sam Green is pointing at the bottom rope, he’s waving off the three count because Eden had her foot draped over the bottom rope!

Angie, still groggy from the punch she ate a moment ago, slowly gets to her feet. She staggers into the corner, where Roxy is waiting for the tag. Roxy enters, stalking over to where Eden is still doubled over. She raises her foot and drives a vicious stomp into the midsection of Eden, crumpling her up even more. She pulls Eden up, and sets up for the DOUBLE D-DT, but doesn’t see the JETSTREAMER coming her way!

Vinegar: Desperation save from Somers!

Jet rolls away into their corner as Eden finally climbs to her feet. Using the ropes for leverage, she manages to get Roxy up, turning her around. She calls out to Jet, who nods and begins climbing the ropes.

Lieberjosch: Maxine is on the apron! Green!! Do your job!

But she takes a CHOK from Jet that sends her back down to the floor! He yells at Eden, “NOW!” and Eden jumps up just as he reaches the top.

Covert Jay: SILENT FLIGHT! THEIR DOUBLE TEAM MANEUVER ON ROXY!!

Vinegar: Eden rolls Roxy up, and Sam drops to the mat.







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2…

















3!!!





Vinegar: They’ve done it! The Court are the Cooperative Champions!!

Lieberjosch: The dream pairing of Morgan and Somers has finally arrived, and they’ve got the gold to prove it!!

Eden and Jet hold each other up, hugging just before Mitchell hands them the Cooperative Championships.

Dennis: Your winners, and NEW UGWC COOPERATIVE CHAMPIONS, EDEN MORGAN, AND JET SOMERS, THE COUUUUUUUUUUURT!!!!

Vinegar: No matter the outcome, you can’t deny that we’ve seen a stellar display of cooperative action here tonight from both teams!

Lieberjosch: And they’re not finished! We’ll see all four competitors in the main even later tonight as they all enter the Massive Melee match!!


The Court - 14.45

#CoolKids - 12.82

[DrunkenBuzzsaw]

Mitchell Dennis: Ladies and gentlemen, it is time for the Main Event of the evening and it is for the UGWC… Wooooooooorld Heavywight Chaaaaaaampionshiiiiiip!

The lights in the arena drop to pitch black – the Globaltron begins to whirl and with smoke and lightening flashes. The Opening Chords of Loverman by Nick Cave and the Black Seeds kicks in.

There's a devil waiting outside your door (How much longer)
Bucking and braying and paywing the floor

The flashing lightening revaeals the sillouette of a Demon writhing in the smoke and flashing light.

Well, he's howling with pain and crawling up the walls
There's a devil waiting outside your door

The smoke begins to tumble out over the entrance way – and the lightning begins to flash in the arena.

He's weak with evil and broken by the world
He's shouting your name and asking for more

A figure appears in the midst of the smoke, moving and writhing in the flashing lights and the whirling smoke.

There's a devil waiting outside your door

And then the lights go out – the music dips to silence for an eerie moment… And then…



Spotlights break through the darkness and reveal Gabriel Baal on the rampway wearing a long, tattered jacket with the hood pulled up over his head. He’s leaning back with his arms to the side in some kind of primal yell, a long chain hanging from his right hand around which it’s wrapped.

He begins his stride to the ring, the chain trailing behind him, and climbs the steps. He steps inside the ring and begins to stalk it with intensity. And he turns to face the camera… As “Loverman!” calls out again at the beginning of the second chorus, he throws back his hood and unzips his jacket to reveal Lucy Wylde’s World Heavyweight Championship underneath.

Mitchell Dennis: First, Residing in New York City, New York, he is the number one contender to the World Heavywieght Championship, weighing in at 238 pounds. Representing The Court, he is The Doctor, The Mechanism of Order, The Serpent… Gaaaaabriel… Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal!

The crowd collectively boo The Court and Gabriel in equal measure.

Mitchell Dennis: And his opponent…

"Undead" by Hollywood Undead hits over the loud speakers and the crowd pop.

Mitchell Dennis: Weighting in at 120 pounds, from Baltimore, Maryland, she is the UGWC World Heavyweight Champion… Luuuuuuuuuucy… Wyyyyyyyyylde!

The crowd continue to go wild and the lights flash and move, but there’s no movement at the top of the ramp. Gabriel’s lip curls into a smile. But still he waits as Lucy’s music dies down.

And then Undead hits again, and Gabriel’s smile slips as he readies himself for her entrance.

Mitchell Dennis: Luuuuuuuuucy…. Wyyyyyyyyyyyylde!

This time, the announcer seems more sure – and the lights begin to move through the arena again. Gabriel’s smile returns as there’s no-one to be found atop the ramp. He begins to ask the announcer to announce something else, but he refuses. Gabriel calls for the referee at ringside to come inside and raise his hand but the referee raises a single finger as if to say “one more time.”

And then… The lights go out…



Gabriel pauses in his tracks as a spotlight drops on him and the ramp and "God's Gonna Cut You Down" by Robin Loxley hits. He stares at the ramp, waiting to see just who is coming to face him. His breathing is heavy, his pulse quickened. The spotlight on the ramp begins to move down the ramp, it quickens as it moves until it hits the ring and stops on Gabriel.

Or at least that’s what he thinks…

The crowd go wild as the spotlight illuminates behind him, where Lucy Wylde is stood, staring a hole in the back of Gabriel’s head. Gabriel senses something is wrong by the noise in the arena, and he slowly turns around to look up into the face of Lucy Wylde – except it’s’ not her face. It’s covered with a modified version of Rogan MacLean’s cthulhu mask. It’s much smaller, and the tenticles wrap around the back to fasten the mask closed. Lucy lets out an almighty scream and Gabriel’s eyes widen in shock as the referee calls for the opening bell.

Vinegar: Lucy’s not giving Baal a chance to react as she throws herself on his back and claws at his face.

Lieberjosch: He hasn’t even had a chance to remove the World Heavyweight Championship yet.

Vinegar: It’s not his. He stole it.

Lieberjosch: Possession is nine-tenths of the law.

Covert Jay: So if you get food and I take it, it’s mine?

Lieberjosch: I’ll break your hand if you try.

Vinegar: Baal thrashes around as he tries to buck the gouging and scratching Wylde off of his back. In spite of her injuries… and obvious weight loss, she’s staying on him.

Lieberjosch: I have no idea how.

Vinegar: Hate is a great movitvator. Even Owen seems a little taken aback by her ferocity.

Lieberjosch: I don’t know what she has to hate him for.

Vinegar: Are you serious?

Lieberjosch: Always.

Vinegar: Where would you like me to begin?

Lieberjosch: Anywhere that makes sense.

Vinegar: Ok. How about months of mental and emotional torture? How about pretending to be her friend, and possibly more before he ripped the rug out from under her? How about possibly ending the careers of both Rogan MacLean and Jason Ingalls, two of her only allies, maybe even friends in this company? How about helping her sociopath father carry out his scheme against her and Magdalena Lockheart? Or how he almost drove a permanent wedge between them? Or how about how the worst one?

Lieberjosch: Which is?

Vinegar: Seriously?

Covert Jay: Didn’t he paralyze her and hand her over to her dad?

Lieberjosch: I don’t remember that.

Vinegar: Stop being an ass, Hans. You remember it. Yes, I mean that. Her father wanted to kill her and Baal actually had the temerity to not only hand her over to him gift wrapped, but to actually threaten her father if he did something that was “too far”!

Lieberjosch: At least he warned him.

Vinegar: You’re unbelievable.

Lieberjosch: I know.

Vinegar: It wasn’t a compliment.

Lieberjosch: I chose to see it as one.

Vinegar: Than you’re as much of an idiot as you claim that Jay is.

Lieberjosch: Yes, but he actually IS an idiot.

Vinegar: Right now, so are you.

Covert Jay: Baal just grabbed Lucy off and tossed her off.

Vinegar: Lucy bounces off of the mat and lets out a painful yell…

Lieberjosch: If I hadn’t seen it myself, I’d have thought that someone was torturing an animal.

Vinegar: She leaps right to her feet and throws herself back at Baal with her fists flying. He barely unlatches the World Championship from his waist and manages to get his hands up as her fingers dig for his eyes.

Lieberjosch: Peterson had better get control over her.

Vinegar: She doesn’t have control over herself. What makes you think that Owen can control her?

Lieberjosch: He’s the referee. It’s his job.

Vinegar: I’m not sure that anyone can control Lucy right now and that’s working to her advantage at the moment. Baal was completely unprepared for such ferocity and it’s momentarily thrown him off of his game plan, at least for the moment.

Lieberjosch: I don’t blame him. She’s acting like a psychopath.

Vinegar: Do you blame her? She just spent the last week plus chained up in a warehouse while her sociopath father physically and emotionally tortured her. That included starvation. He also threatened to kill her sister before, might I add, threatening to do the same to her.

Lieberjosch: Some people handle stress better than others.

Vinegar: You’re in rare asshole form tonight, Hans. You can’t possibly justify what Baal helped her father do.

Lieberjosch: “Helped” is the important word. He didn’t do it himself.

Vinegar: She wouldn’t have been in that position in the first place if he hadn’t paralyzed and kidnapped her.

Lieberjosch: Details.

Vinegar: I don’t even know what to say to that, so I’m just going to go back to calling the match.

Covert Jay: The last couple of minutes has been a cycle of Wylde attacking Baal by trying to gouge his eyes out, Baal throwing her off and her going back for more.

Lieberjosch: Peterson really has to get a handle on her.

Vinegar: It doesn’t look to me like Owen wants to get anywhere near her.

Lieberjosch: I don’t want to be near her either, but I’m not the referee. Owen is.

Vinegar: He’s aware of that.

Lieberjosch: Good. I don’t want to have to remind him.

Vinegar: Baal tosses Lucy off again and again she springs to her feet and blitzes at him. None of her attacks have connected with his eyes, but she has left him with a few nasty looking scratch marks on his face.

Lieberjosch: He finally seems to have regained his composure.

Vinegar: Maybe. He just sidestepped her latest blitz, grabbed her by the shoulders and threw her shoulder first into the corner.

Covert Jay: It made a nasty sound when it impacted.

Vinegar: Yes it did and it’s clear that she’s still in a immense pain from the torture that her father subjected her to. Did you hear the sound of that yowl she let out when she hit the corner post?

Lieberjosch: Yes and once again that’s a sound that I never want to hear again.

Vinegar: Baal grabs her, pulls her out of the corner, spins around and throws her back into it. She slams into with with another sickening thud, then stumbles backwards and out towards center ring as she clutches at her shoulder. Baal charges across the ring....

Covert Jay: Big boot!

Lieberjosch: Unfortunately for her, her head is at the perfect height for that.

Vinegar: The impact nearly sent Lucy from the ring and has momentarily brought her momentum to a violent halt.

Lieberjosch: It didn’t quite send her from the ring, but it get her tangled up in the ropes.

Vinegar: Just like the predator he is, Baal is going to take advantage of it. Look at that sick and smug smile on his face.

Lieberjosch: He should take advantage of it.

Covert Jay: If I’m going to be honest, guys, Lucy is scaring me right now.

Lieberjosch: I don’t agree with you often, but her wild thrashing and… noises… while she tries to escape from the ropes are quite frankly unnerving.

Vinegar: “Noises”. Would you care to elaborate?

Lieberjosch: You can hear her. So can everyone watching.

Vinegar: Sure, but you’re the best color man in the business, aren’t you?

Lieberjosch: I am.

Vinegar: Ok then.

Lieberjosch: She sounds like an enraged Tasmanian devil on crank.

Vinegar: See, that wasn’t so hard. It’s also accurate. The guttural and animalistic screams of rage that she’s bellowing out are certainly giving Owen pause.

Lieberjosch: Baal looks equal measures fascinated, pleased and slightly unnerved by it.

Vinegar: Baal walks up to her and reaches out to pat her on the cheek, but jerks his hand back when Lucy lunges at him.

Lieberjosch: I think she was trying to bite him, but with that mask still on it didn’t exactly work.

Vinegar: I didn’t, but now Baal steps to the side and puts his right pointer and middle fingers under the chin of her mask and slowly pushes it up until it’s off of her face. He lifts it up and smiles at it before he pats her on the cheek and backs up a few steps so that he’s back out in front of her.

Lieberjosch: Mind games are a good strategy against someone who is as unhinged as Wylde is right now.

Vinegar: Maybe. It could backfire horribly given her current state of mind.
Lieberjosch: We shall see.

Vinegar: Baal lifts the mask up and examines it as Lucy shrieks at him to give it back

Covert Jay: It looks like he’s going to. See, he’s not a bad guy.

Lieberjosch: I tried to tell Nick that. He doesn’t believe me.

Vinegar: There’s no reason to. Baal holds the mask out in front of Lucy as if he’s going to give it back. Lucy yells at him to return it.

Lieberjosch: I’d call that more of a primordial roar.

Baal: Baal extends the mask out in front of her and drops it…

Fans: BOOOOO!!!!!

Covert Jay: I don’t think that was smart.

Lieberjosch: Anything to throw her further off of her game...not that she’s on it.

Vinegar: Baal just leapt up and came down on on the mask with both feet.

Covert Jay: Is there an exorcist in the house? We need an exorcist…

Lieberjosch: If her head spins, I’m out of here.

Vinegar: I’ll be right behind you. That’s one of the most terrifying screams that I’ve ever heard.

Covert Jay: I don’t get it. It’s just a mask.

Vinegar: That mask represents both Rorgan MacLean and Jason Ingalls to her and it represents everything that Baal did to both of them to take them out of her life. I’m not surprised that she’s reacting that way, I’m just a little taken aback by the ferocity of it.

Lieberjosch: As am I. It seems to be causing Baal to reevaluate his approach.

Vinegar: Baal slides from the ring so that he’s behind Lucy. Owen warns him to get back in and Baal just laughs him off.

Lieberjosch: As long as Peterson isn’t counting, there’s no reason for Baal to listen to him.

Vinegar: Baal grabs both of Lucy’s ankles and pulls her backwards so that her back is bending under the bottom rope. She lets out a loud yell of pain but refuses to submit when Owen asks her if she wants to. Baal continues to wrench back on her legs as she yells out in pain, but refuses to submit.

Covert Jay: Do you think that Baal is aware that his pulling back is slowly freeing her from the ropes?

Lieberjosch: I doubt that he cares.

Vinegar: Jay is right. Every time he wrenches back on her, it loosens her arms from the ropes.

Lieberjosch: But at what cost to Lucy? As sore as her ribs and shoulders have to be after what her father did to her, that torque has to be excruciating.

Vinegar: Owen begins to count, which he honestly should have been doing a while ago. Baal watches it from outside the ring but doesn’t seem to be bothered by it.

Covert Jay: He’s up to four, so Baal might want to.

Vinegar: Baal releases her legs and slides back in as Owen gets to seven. He advances on Lucy, who lashes out with two wild kicks that Ball easily sidesteps.

Lieberjosch: He’s a smart man. He has a plan here.

Vinegar: Baal advances on her and she lashes out with another kick. Lucy lashes out at him and this time he catches her leg. She tries to struggle against it, but is in obvious pain as she does so.

Lieberjosch: Baal just caught her other leg and has her held up by them. Lucy screeches at him, but Baal just laughs at her.

Covert Jay: Baal is clearly enjoying being in control.

Vinegar: Baal lifts her legs up until he has his hand in front of his face.

Covert Jay: Did he just lift his finger up and tell her to be quiet?

Lieberjosch: It looked that way.

Vinegar: That was… different.

Lieberjosch: Here’s where Baal is the most dangerous. He has her vulnerable and clearly has an immense size and power advantage.

Fans: OHHHH!!!

Vinegar: Did you see that?

Lieberjosch: I did. There’s the power I was just talking about.

Vinegar: Baal just dropped his knees, then sprung up and tossed her up by her legs. She must have been seven or eight feet in the air!

Lieberjosch: Easily seven and a half feet as he’s six foot, three and he tossed her as high overhead as he could.

Covert Jay: That impact was terrifying!

Vinegar: I agree, Jay. Not only did she half corkscrew once while she was in the air, but she slammed down hard on her shoulders and neck.

Lieberjosch: Not just that, but her head viciously bounced off of the mat. I’d be amazed if she wasn’t knocked unconscious.

Vinegar: Me too, Hans.

Covert Jay: Owen looks concerned.

Vinegar: He should, but there’s literally nothing he can do.

Lieberjosch: That’s true, Nick. He could stop the match and call for medical attention if he wants to, but I doubt he’ll do that.

Vinegar: Baal walks over to Lucy and looks down at her. He bends over and pats her on the side of the face.

Lieberjosch: She didn’t twitch.

Vinegar: Baal smiles and sticks a single foot on top of her before he imperiously points to the mat. Owen stares at him for a moment and shakes his head, then drops to the mat.

Covert Jay: One!

Lieberjosch: Two! We’re going to have a new World Champion!
Vinegar: Owen’s hand comes down for the three…

Fans: Ohhhhh!!!

Covert Jay: Wow! How the hell did she kick out?!

Lieberjosch: She barely kicked out. His hand was a hundredth of a second from hitting from the mat when she barely got her shoulder up. That fall and impact did a lot of damage to her.

Vinegar: Baal scowls at Owen and slaps his hands three times, but Owen just shrugs and points at Baal before shifting his left shoulder forward. Baal glares at him again, then moves over to Lucy, who still hasn’t moved since jerking her shoulder up to break the count.

Lieberjosch: Her body has to feel like it’s on fire right now. Between the punishment her father laid on her and that titanic fall and impact that she just took, every nerve in her body has to be screaming at her to stop.

Vinegar: They might be. Baal walks back over to Lucy and pulls her from the mat. Her body is still limp. He wraps her arms around her and heaves over…

Lieberjosch: I don’t know if “heaves” is the right word, but that belly-to-belly suplex just added pain on top of misery as she crashed down on her back again.

Vinegar: Ball walks over and pulls her up again, wrapping his arms around her. It looks to me like this might be his strategy going forward.

Lieberjosch: It should be. At some point her body is just going to be in too much pain to respond to her desire to get up.

Vinegar: He throws her across the ring with another suplex, then slowly walks over to her and pulls her up and throws her across the ring with another one that leaves her crumpled in the corner.

Lieberjosch: Baal is wrestling a very intelligent match. He’s keeping the pace slow, not only because he doesn’t have to go quickly, but because it keeps him fresher over the course of the match. Conversely, the more abuse he heaps on her, the less likely she is to mount any kind of comeback.

Vinegar: Right now it’s his match to win. I hate to say that considering what he’s done to her, but every advantage is his right now.

Covert Jay: Did you guys notice how Lucy winces every time she breathes?

Lieberjosch: I did and I’m certain that Nicholas did as well. Those bruised ribs are taking a battering and breathing is going to get harder and harder for her as the match goes on.

Vinegar: Baal walks over and wraps her up from behind by underhooking her arms. He pushes up on his feet, drops her over his head and slams her down onto the back of her head and neck.

Lieberjosch: He calls that “The Call”, a bridging German suplex. Once again he’s very wisely working over her neck and head.

Vinegar: Owen drops to the mat for the count. There’s “one”!

Covert Jay: Two!

Lieberjosch: Thre...no! She kicks out again!

Vinegar: Baal stands up and smiles down at her. He nods his head and then backs up a few steps.

Lieberjosch: I think he’s ready to put her lights out for good.

Vinegar: Baal crouches by the corner and waits as Lucy begins to slowly crawl to her feet. Every movement looks labored and painful and every breath comes in a loud gasp.

Covert Jay: If he connects with this, we have a new Champion.

Vinegar: Lucy finally pulls herself to her feet and staggers outward…

Lieberjosch: “Catatonia”!! He hit the superkick!

Vinegar: Lucy crumples to the mat and Baal is quick to cover her. Here’s Owen with the count!

Lieberjosch: One!

Fans: Two!

Vinegar: Thre...no!!

Lieberjosch: She got her foot onto the bottom rope to break the count! Even I have to credit her for her ring awareness given the situation!

Vinegar: Would you consider a not pulling her from the ring to be a critical error by Baal?

Lieberjosch: That remains to be seen, but it could be.

Vinegar: Baal yanks her leg off of the rope and demands that Owen count again.

Lieberjosch: Owen drops to the mat and pounds the mat for the “one”.

Vinegar: There’s the “two”!

Covert Jay: She kicked out again! How??

Vinegar: She’s tenacious!

Lieberjosch: For the first time in this match, Baal looks a bit frustrated.

Vinegar: Given her condition, I think there’s a part of him that expected this to be a walk over.

Lieberjosch: Baal can’t let his emotions get in the way. He has a clear path to victory right now. He needs to keep the pressure on and he’ll be a two-time World Heavyweight Champion.

Vinegar: Baal stands up and walks over to the corner where the chain sits. He pulls it up and wraps it around his fist, then look at Lucy as she pulls herself up by the ropes. He smiles maliciously as Owen tells him to put the chain down.

Lieberjosch: I’m sure that he has a plan.

Vinegar: Baal slowly advances on Lucy with the chain wrapped around his fist and malice in his eyes. Owen yells at him to drop throw the chain out of the ring, but Baal ignores him.

Lieberjosch: Don’t do anything stupid here, Gabriel!

Vinegar: Baal lifts his arm up and throws his arm towards the dazed Wylde…

Fans: Ohhhh!!!

Vinegar: What the hell??!!!

Lieberjosch: Hahahaha!! He just faked Owen out and sucker punched him with the chain!

Vinegar: That son of a bitch!

Lieberjosch: What a strategy!

Vinegar: What a prick!

Lieberjosch: Language, Nicholas. Language.

Vinegar: Lucy watches Owen as he drops to the mat and then looks up at Baal in shock.

Lieberjosch: He’s always a step ahead!

Vinegar: Baal looks from his fist to Lucy and smiles. She glares at him, but never gets to do more as he lashes out and slams his chain wrapped fist into her forehead. She collapses to the mat and Baal is immediately on her, pounding away with the chain.

Lieberjosch: His face is calm, but that’s that’s a look of fury in his eyes.

Covert Jay: He has bad intentions and there’s no referee here to stop him.

Vinegar: Baal continues to pound away at Lucy as he lays in punch after punch.

Lieberjosch: It’s a great strategy. Owen won’t know that Baal intentionally hit him when he comes to and by the time he’s done, he’ll have rung her bell so hard and so often with that chain that she might as well just lay down and just let him pin her.

Vinegar: This is gutless! He’s trying to steal the championship!

Lieberjosch: You call it “theft”. I call it eliminating a risk.

Vinegar: You’re as disgusting as he is.

Lieberjosch: No, I just understand that “anything for the World Championship” is the attitude that a World Champion should have.

Vinegar: Baal finally stands up and looks down at his fist.

Covert Jay: Would you look at Lucy’s head?

Vinegar: She’s covered in blood…

Lieberjosch: Baal’s smiling from ear to ear right now.

Vinegar: He reaches down and pulls Lucy from the mat, then steps behind her and loops the chain around her neck...what’s that sick bastard about to do?

Lieberjosch: I think I know.

Covert Jay: You don’t think he’d do that…

Lieberjosch: I think he would. He wants to win.

Vinegar: That would be horrific!

Lieberjosch: Maybe, but you do what you have to do win.

Vinegar: Baal takes off for the ropes, dragging Lucy behind him as she barely manages to stay on her feet. Don’t do it, Gabriel! Don’t do it!

Lieberjosch: He’s gonna do it.

Vinegar: No, no, no!!!

Covert Jay: Oh my god…

Vinegar: What the hell is wrong with you, Baal??!!! Let her go!!!

Lieberjosch: It’s a strategy.

Vinegar: He’s hanging her from the top rope by her neck with that chain! That’s not a “strategy”. That’s attempted murder!!

Lieberjosch: Six of one, one half of the other.

Vinegar: Look at her legs kick as she tries to get her fingers under that chain so she can push it away from her neck! He’s choking her out with it!

Lieberjosch: Unconscious bodies are easier to pin.

Vinegar: Not with the referee unconscious inside the ring!

Lieberjosch: Then he has free reign to do whatever he wants to her.

Vinegar: How can you possibly condone this?

Lieberjosch: Listen, it’s not something I would do if I was in there, but he’s trying to win. I respect his drive, even if I wouldn’t personally use his tactics.

Covert Jay: I think that he’d better pay attention.

Vinegar: Yes. I don’t think he knows that Owen is actually awake and stirring.

Lieberjosch: I don’t know that he cares.

Vinegar: Owen is back to his feet and he shakes the cobwebs out. He looks at Baal, then walks over to him as he wipes the blood from his eyes.

Lieberjosch: We’ll see how he handles what happened. A DQ would be a terrible way for this to end.

Vinegar: He reaches Baal, who still has Lucy hung over the rope. He grabs Baal by the hand and spins him around.

Covert Jay: That momentary look of surprise isn't going to do him any favors.

Vinegar: It's a good thing that Baal released the chain when he felt Owen grab him, or the violent turn could have snapped Lucy’s neck!

Lieberjosch: Thankfully that did not happen. Unfortunately for Baal, he has an irate referee in his face and reading him the proverbial “riot act".

Covert Jay: I'm not sure that I've seen Owen this angry in a long time.

Lieberjosch: Baal has to get this situation under control. Every second he takes arguing with Owen gives Lucy time to recover.

Vinegar: Yes and she's stirring at ringside. I also think that Baal has forgotten about the chain, which she's found.

Covert Jay: That won't be good for Baal.

Vinegar: Baal continues to argue with Owen as Lucy slowly crawls to her feet with the aid of the ring apron. She pulls the chain up in her left hand and smiles, then throws it between Baal’s legs and loops it around his left leg.

Lieberjosch: I have no idea how she's still conscious, let alone on her feet and doing, well… anything.

Vinegar: Baal notices a second too late that the chain is around his leg. He looks over his shoulder at the blood covered face of Lucy Wylde, who smiles at him and gives him a finger waggling wave before she yanks back violently on the chain.

Lieberjosch: Baal just ate the canvas chin first!

Vinegar: Baal’s stunned and Lucy yanks him under the bottom rope and to the floor.

Covert Jay: Unfortunately for him, his face bounced off of the apron on the way out.

Vinegar: Lucy pulls Baal up by the sides of his head, then smiles at him.

Lieberjosch: She just wiped her bloody hand down the side of his face! What a Philistine!

Covert Jay: Who's Phil?

Lieberjosch: Shut up, idiot.

Vinegar: She wheels around and throws Baal back first into the railing. Baal hits it hard and slides down to the floor. Lucy lets loose with something between a war cry and a banshee scream and charges at Baal.

Covert Jay: Ouch…

Lieberjosch: He might be bleeding after that.

Vinegar: That was an absolutely vicious running knee! Baal’s head slammed into the railing and bounced off.

Lieberjosch: Then rolled forward to his chest. He might be out.

Vinegar: Lucy smiles at the fallen Baal, then backs up a few steps. She lets out another banshee like scream and charges again.

Fans: Owww!!!

Lieberjosch: Another vicious knee strike to Baal’s head! Stop this, Owen!

Vinegar: Screw you, Hans! You've condoned every barbaric thing he's done to her, but THIS is a bridge too far?

Lieberjosch: Yes! She could have fractured his skull!

Vinegar: You're a hypocrite!

Covert Jay: Ouch! She just bounced him off of the railing again!

Vinegar: She has a lot of anger to get out.

Lieberjosch: She’s taking it too far!

Vinegar: So you've said. Now shut up.

Lieberjosch: There's no need to be hostile.

Vinegar: Lucy pulls Baal to his feet and leads him over to the steps. She points at them and gets a huge roar of approval from the fans. She smiles and lets loose another maniacal yell, the spins and throws him face first into the steps.

Lieberjosch: Then collapses to the floor because it hurt her as much as it hurt him. Bravo.

Vinegar: Everything is going to hurt her at this point.

Covert Jay: She's back to her feet and he’s still not moving.

Vinegar: Lucy pulls Baal up with a noticeable wince and shoves him over to the apron.

Lieberjosch: Let’s see how she pulls this off.

Vinegar: His top half is already on the apron, so one leg at a time and push.

Covert Jay: She has the first let up, but the second one won’t be easy.

Vinegar: She doesn’t appear to want to push the second one in. It’s dangling outside of the ring and laying against the steps.

Lieberjosch: She’d better not do what I think she’s going to do.

Vinegar: Lucy just pulled the ring steps out slightly, which allowed his leg to drop into the gap that created.

Lieberjosch: Why is Owen not counting?

Vinegar: I’m going to go out on a limb and say that being sucker punched in the face with a steel chain has something to do with it.

Covert Jay: “Out on a limb”. That’s funny. Does that make him her “Baal and Chain”?

Vinegar: I...what?

Lieberjosch: All of a sudden my head hurts.

Vinegar: Did you just make a joke?

Lieberjosch: He did and painfully it was actually somewhat clever.

Vinegar: Right...anyway, Lucy sees his leg drop between the post and the steps. She backs up a few steps, grabs at her ribs and then smiles.

Covert Jay: Incoming!!!

Lieberjosch: Oh my god…

Vinegar: Did you hear that “clang”?!

Lieberjosch: I did. Baal is awake now!

Vinegar: Yes he is! That woke him up in a hurry and he shoves the steps away, then staggers a few steps away before he collapses against the ring apron.

Covert Jay: Lucy is in hot pursuit...and she is hot!

Lieberjosch: She’s covered in blood! What’s wrong with you?

Vinegar: Lucy follows Baal around the ring. He manages to roll himself in before he clutches at his leg in agony. Lucy quickly ascends the ropes, god knows how given the beating she’s taken and looks down at him with a sick smile.

Lieberjosch: The fact that she’s even moving, let alone standing is absolutely incredible.

Vinegar: Baal yells at Owen that his leg is hurt. Owen asks him if he wants to give up and he yells “no” in return.

Covert Jay: He shouldn’t have taken his eyes off of Lucy!

Lieberjosch: No he shouldn’t have!

Vinegar: “Calamity from the Skies”!!

Lieberjosch: How in the hell did she pull that off??

Vinegar: Hatred and adrenaline are a hell of a combination! Pin him, Lucy! Pin him!!

Lieberjosch: She should, but she isn’t! She wants to punish him more! This is a far cry from the screaming lunatic we saw earlier in the match.

Vinegar: It is! She’s being much more calculating now.

Covert Jay: She’s backing up now…

Vinegar: She’s sizing Baal up as he rolls over onto his stomach after taking that double rotation moonsault.

Lieberjosch: Look up Doc! Move!

Covert Jay: Blonde berzerker away!!!

Vinegar: “Keep Your Chin Up!!!” She hit Baal square in the side of the head with it!

Lieberjosch: She just hit two of her three finishers on him. She has to pin him!

Vinegar: I don’t think she’s done!

Covert Jay: Is she going for another one?

Vinegar: She’s going to have to wait if she is, Baal is still out!

Lieberjosch: What’s the doing?

Vinegar: Dragging him over to the corner by the look of it.

Lieberjosch: She just pulled him to the corner and slide out of the ring. It looks to me like she’s going to keep working his legs over.

Vinegar: I believe that you’re right.

Lieberjosch: Wait...she just...nevermind!

Covert Jay: Yahtzee!!

Vinegar: She just crotched him with the ring post!

Lieberjosch: Baal is awake again and he’s in a world of hurt!

Vinegar: Lucy rolls back into the ring and momentarily collapses to the mat. She’s clearly exhausted and in incredible pain.

Covert Jay: Baal just pushed himself out of the corner but is clearly...checking on what’s important.

Vinegar: Dropkick to the back of the head by Lucy! Baal snaps forward and then drops to the mat. Lucy bounces off of the ropes and leaps up…

Lieberjosch: Legrop to the...I can’t tell if that was the stomach or the crotch!

Vinegar: Probably both, but Owen is allowing it and Lucy has already bounced off of the far ropes…

Covert Jay: Shining Wizard!

Vinegar: She landed that squarely and Baal is back down again.

Covert Jay: Did you hear the crack from the impact?

Lieberjosch: I think northern Maine heard it!

Vinegar: She backs up and lines him up....he rolls over…

Lieberjosch: Another “Keep Your Chin Up!”

Covert Jay: That one spun him around!

Lieberjosch: Baal rolls to the ropes and slowly drags himself up. He’s in a danger zone now.

Covert Jay: Riiiide into the danger zone!

Lieberjosch: Shut up, imbecile!

Vinegar: Baal staggers away from the ropes, his eyes glassy. He makes it to center ring, he turns…

Covert Jay: Wylde Liberation!!

Lieberjosch: She just planted him in center ring!

Vinegar: Lucy collapses on top of Baal and Owen drops for the count! Here it comes!

Lieberjosch: One!

Covert Jay: Two!!

Vinegar and Fans: Three!! She did it!!! After all of that Lucy Wylde retained her World Championship!!!

Mitchell Dennis: Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this match and STILL UGWC WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION…. LUCY WYYYYYYYYLDE!!!!
Vinegar: This place just went crazy! After all of that abuse and torment, after the hellacious beating that she took, after Baal assaulted her and Owen Peterson with a steel chain, it’s only appropriate that the chain becomes the instrument of his downfall before Lucy Wylde retains the World Championship in one of the gutsiest performances in the history of the company!

Lieberjosch: That was absolutely insane. The Melee better be extra crazy to top this!

Vinegar: Stay tuned folks, our Main Event, the Massive Melee is next!!

Lucy Wylde - 7.50

Gabriel Baal - 7.47

[DrunkenBuzzsaw]

Vinegar: What a fantastic night it has already been here in Cleveland, and the biggest event of the evening is about to begin! It is time for the Massive Melee!

Lieberjosch: For the first time in history, there will be thirty Entertainment Professionals competing for the opportunity to face the World Heavyweight Champion for the title next month at the WrestleStock festival!

Vinegar: Jay, can you review for our fans the rules.

Covert Jay: All of the participants have drawn a random entrance position and in just a few moments the individuals that drew numbers one and two will come to the ring and the match will begin. Every two minutes, the next entrant will join the match, until all thirty participants have entered. Elimination comes when a participant goes over the top rope with both feet touching the floor.

Lieberjosch: That’s BOTH feet.

Covert Jay: Don’t forget the steel cage that ominously hangs above the ring, twice during the match that cage will lower around the ring for several minutes, obviously influencing and impacting the action within it.

Lieberjosch: Okay, let’s see who’s fucked.

Dennis: It is time for the MASSIVE MELEE MATCH! Entering the match in the first entrance position is…

Vinegar: Who is it?

Covert Jay: A sad panda, I’ll tell you that right now.

Vinegar: Oh my!

Dennis: Entering the Massive Melee at number one, The Embodiment of Fear, PHRRIXXXUSSS DEEEIIIIMMOOOSSSSSSSS!!!!

Covert Jay: And if anything, this is the one person that likely has no qualms at all about entering in the first position, Fear has won the Massive Melee twice in his career, and he did it from the second and third positions, if anybody can pull off winning from this spot, it is Phrixus Deimos!

Vinegar: Don’t forget the added wrinkle of the additional ten participants here tonight, that is something that not even Deimos has had to contend with.

Lieberjosch: I’d also point out that those two years that he won, he didn’t need to face Zane Scott earlier in the night.

Dennis: And now, the Entertainment Professional that drew number two…

Vinegar: Who is it?

Covert Jay: You’re always so impatient.

Dennis: Representing the #CoolKids, ANGELICCAAAA VAAUGHHHNNNNNNN!!!!

Vinegar: Angelica Vaughn entering at number two, she will start the Massive Melee against Deimos.

Lieberjosch: Another person for whom this is the second match of the evening, this is going to be a very tall task for both of them.

Vinegar: Deimos and Vaughn, your first two participants in the 2018 Massive Melee, we are ready to go!

DING DING!!

Vinegar: Deimos and Vaughn slowly circling the ring, probably a wise move on the part of both of them, thirty entrants means at least an hour if these two plan on winning, important to pace yourself.

Lieberjosch: Better to get your opponent out so when more come you only have to deal with one at a time!

Covert Jay: Not to mention you’d have the rest of the two minute interval to rest and recuperate.

Vinegar: And now a double elbow tie-up, both competitors grappling for position, Deimos pivots and lifts Vaughn into a fireman’s carry takedown. Vaughn rolls right to her feet, only for Deimos to grab her from behind and hurl her over the top rope!

Lieberjosch: Angie holds on to the top rope and saves herself from elimination, rolling back in under the bottom rope, Deimos nods as he watches, as though noting something to himself.

Vinegar: Deimos approaches as Vaughn is getting back up, and she greets him with a backhanded slap. Deimos ducks under a roundhouse kick, comes off the ropes right into a drop toe hold that takes him down.

Covert Jay: Angie transitions right to a side headlock, giving herself a moment to collect herself, that’s about all it’s good for in a match like the Massive Melee.

Vinegar: Deimos works his way to one knee as Vaughn tries to maintain the headlock, but he gets his other foot planted, stands and lifts Vaughn into a side suplex!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Lieberjosch: Entrant number three is Annie Fugate!

Vinegar: Annie “Nightmare” Fugate is set to make her Chill in-ring debut next week against Venus in a match that will see the infamous Boss Penguin return to UGWC, seated on a pole.

Covert Jay: And what show can you see that on?

Vinegar: UGWC: Chill.

Covert Jay: UGWC N Chill!

Vinegar: I refuse to dignify that, as Fugate slides into the ring and ducks a clothesline from Deimos before taking him down with a Russian leg sweep.

Lieberjosch: Snap suplex to Angelica Vaughn by Fugate, and she turns her attention back to Deimos again, setting him up for a double arm DDT.

Covert Jay: Fear breaks free of her grip before she can finish the move, pulls the Nightmare’s legs out from under her and catapults her into the corner!

Vinegar: Fugate went face first into the turnbuckle, she stumbles back towards the rest of the ring, but Deimos comes in hard with a spear, slamming Fugate’s back into the middle turnbuckle.

Lieberjosch: Fugate slumps in the corner, and Deimos moves out of the way as Vaughn comes flying in with a cannonball!

Vinegar: Deimos grabs Vaughn from behind and lifts her over the top rope!

Covert Jay: But Angie again holds on to that top rope, and she lands safely on the apron and rolls back in!

Vinegar: Deimos had Fugate pinned against the bottom turnbuckle by the throat with his boot, he turns his attention back to Vaughn upon seeing she is back in again and getting up, and Vaughn tries to kick him in the chest, but Deimos catches the leg!

Lieberjosch: Vaughn hops on one foot, twists her body and connects with a mule kick!

Vinegar: Deimos rolls onto his knees, slumped onto them actually, and Vaughn winds up and delivers a stiff kick to the chest, and then another!

Covert Jay: It’s the OBVS! Kicks.

Lieberjosch: Seriously?

Covert Jay: OBVS!

Vinegar: Another kick to Deimos, Fugate is back to her feet and charging, but she runs right into a roundhouse kick from Vaughn!

Lieberjosch: And she turns back for another kick to the reeling Deimos!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!

Vinegar: From Shakedown, it’s Io entering at number four!

Covert Jay: The Human Lawn Dart rushes down the ramp and jumps up on the apron. She springboards into the air for a flying superman punch, Angie moves out of the way and Io connects on Fear!

Lieberjosch: Io springs to her feet and connects with a running forearm smash on Vaughn, spins and emits a war cry as she rushes at Fugate, fights her back to the ropes with a series of blows, Fugate whipped across the ring, off the ropes and into the Eye Opener!

Vinegar: Io’s partner Venus takes on Annie Fugate next week on Chill, perhaps a message being delivered here tonight by Io!

Covert Jay: Io bent over, perhaps telling Fugate as much, and Angie comes off the ropes and connects with a scissor kick.

Lieberjosch: Vaughn brings Fugate to the ropes, but Fugate elbows her in the chest, ducks away.

Vinegar: Fugate looking for the Stroke of Midnight, but Vaughn ducks it and backdrops her over the ropes to ringside!

Elimination: Annie Fugate by Angelica Vaughn

Lieberjosch: Meanwhile Deimos has Io, and he rather unceremoniously picks her up and hurls her over the ropes.

Covert Jay: Not quite a lawn darting, but effective under the circumstances.

Elimination: Io by Phrixus Deimos

Vinegar: Deimos and Vaughn staring at each other across the ring, our first two entrants prepared to square off again!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Vinegar: Entrant five is one of the marquee stars of the Chill brand, Kenzi Grey-Lacklan!

Lieberjosch: And in terms of immediate impact, it means that Deimos is about to be in the ring with two #CoolKids at the same time!

Covert Jay: It’s not like they are going to let him sit at their table.

Lieberjosch: But they’re going to have him outnumbered!

Vinegar: Vaughn smiles as Kenzi is coming down the ramp, but Deimos rushes her with a European uppercut, knocking her back into the corner. Deimos tries to force her out over the ropes, but Kenzi arrives in the ring and charges.

Lieberjosch: Deimos steps out of the way and Kenzi slams on the breaks before she makes contact with Vaughn.

Vinegar: Deimos comes at her from behind, Kenzi catches him with a back elbow. She props herself up onto the second rope and leaps for a shotgun dropkick, knocking Deimos onto his back.

Covert Jay: Fear trying to get back up, but Kenzi grabs him and plants him with a Kickout DDT.

Vinegar: Vaughn has steadied herself back in the ring, and she and Kenzi exchange and glance and both go to Deimos. They bring him to the ropes, they’re going to work together to eliminate him.

Lieberjosch: Smart strategy, that’s exactly what they should do, get rid of him before he gets backup.

Covert Jay: That would be anytime in the rest of the match. Who do you think would possibly come out here and want to help Fear?

Vinegar: They nearly have him out, but Deimos springs to life, throwing elbows at Vaughn to back her away, kicking at Kenzi to knock her loose, and he lands safely on the apron.

Lieberjosch: Deimos starts to come back through the ropes, but Kenzi grabs him and gets him hung up, and she plants him with the Season Finale!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Vinegar: Long road ahead for Lockheart, coming in at number six, and it doesn’t matter that she won the Cross-Hemisphere Title earlier tonight, what that means for right now is that has already had to expend a lot of energy, you wonder how much is left in the tank.

Covert Jay: But DID YOU KNOW that Wade Caldwell had Maggie Lockheart ranked at number two on his Massive Melee Countdown? This might not be an ideal entrance position, but Maggie has already had a great night, it could very well be about to get even better!

Lieberjosch: I don’t know or care who Wade Caldwell is.

Vinegar: Lockheart into the ring, she won the Cross-Hemisphere Title earlier tonight, and now she ducks under a clothesline from Kenzi and connects with a leaping forearm on Vaughn.

Lieberjosch: She takes Kenzi down with an arm drag, judo hip toss to Vaughn, and Lockheart is on fire!

Vinegar: Lockheart glances at Deimos, still down from the Season Finale, Kenzi goes to grab her from behind, but Lockheart connects with a pele kick!

Covert Jay: Beat Rush to Angie, kicks to the back of the knee and the back of the head, and now the head driven into the canvas with the Lacrimosa!

Vinegar: With Vaughn down, Lockheart turns her attention back to Kenzi, bringing her to the ropes and attempting to force her out.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!

Lieberjosch: Sidney Grey!?!

Covert Jay: This explains why the momager didn’t accompany Kenzi to the ring, she’s actually in the match!

Vinegar: Grey rushing down the ramp as Lockheart nearly has Kenzi out, and she reaches under the ropes and yanks on Lockheart’s leg, tripping her up and allowing Kenzi to land safely back inside the ring.

Lieberjosch: Kenzi doesn’t appear to have noticed the help, as she grabs Lockheart and hits the Breakthrough Performance!

Vinegar: But before she can follow up, Deimos slides in with a chop block, taking out Kenzi’s knee.

Covert Jay: Sid reaches in under the bottom rope again, this time tripping up Fear, and he recovers his balance and glares at her, that might have been a mistake.

Vinegar: Deimos rolling out under the bottom rope, that’s under the bottom rope, he is not eliminated, and he begins walking towards Sidney Grey, who backs away with her hands up.

Lieberjosch: She begins to run and Deimos gives chase, chasing her a full lap around the ring before Kenzi baseball slides under the bottom rope, kicking him right in the face.

Vinegar: Brian Chartreuse emphatically signaling that Kenzi is safe from elimination, she went under the ropes as well, as Kenzi pushes Deimos back into the ring and climbs herself from the apron to the turnbuckle.

Covert Jay: Kenzi on the top rope, she is looking to tell Fear that she is better than he is!

Vinegar: Kenzi leaps for a shooting star press, but Deimos rolls out of the way and Kenzi crashes on the mat!

Covert Jay: That was a Meteor Press!

Vinegar: Deimos springs to his feet, grabs Kenzi and plants her with a DDT!

Lieberjosch: A quick burst of energy by Deimos, that might have been all he had, on one knee now and holding his head, he needs to capitalize now and get somebody out of here while he has an opening!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Lieberjosch: Well, there goes that.

Vinegar: Zane Scott entering at number eight, Phrixus Deimos rising to his feet as Scott is taking his time coming down the ramp, these two fierce rivals eyes firmly locked on each other.

Covert Jay: They went through a war earlier tonight, slight limp by Zane on that right leg, might still be feeling the effects as it looks like that war is going to continue.

Lieberjosch: Sidney Grey was near the bottom of the ramp, she’s making what’s probably a smart decision to move away and come around the ring, as Zane arrives at ringside and climbs up on the apron before stepping in through the ropes.

Vinegar: Scott and Deimos staring at each other across the ring, this crowd is the loudest it has been yet in this match, and now Scott charges…

Lieberjosch: He delivers a running big boot to Angelica Vaughn!

Vinegar: Vaughn was creeping behind Deimos, Scott just took her out, Deimos didn’t so much as flinch.

Covert Jay: Now Fear turns and locks eyes with Zane, and Zane looks in the direction of Kenzi!

Lieberjosch: Zane Scott is a smart competitor, they both are, and as much as you know these two want to continue to tear each other apart, Vaughn and Kenzi are a combined threat, you’ve got Sidney Grey lurking on the outside, and they have support still coming at any time!

Vinegar: Deimos delivers clubbing blows to the back of Kenzi, Zane eyeing him cautiously for a moment before turning his attention back to Vaughn, grabbing her by the head and pulling her up.

Covert Jay: EW!

Vinegar: Vaughn catches Zane by surprise, she has him with a mandible claw!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Vinegar: Dave Rydell is number nine!

Lieberjosch: Deimos still has control of Kenzi, and now Sidney Grey is up on the apron and yelling at him.

Covert Jay: Fear stares at her and starts to approach, but Rydell slides in behind him and spins him around into the Virus of Life!

Lieberjosch: Zane is fading in the EW! He is down to one knee, but he grabs the ropes with one hand and uses them for leverage, using his other arm to lift Vaughn up off the ground, and uses both hands to press her overhead and throw her over the ropes to ringside!

Elimination: Angelica Vaughn by Zane Scott

Vinegar: Over twelve minutes for Vaughn, a nice showing in her Melee debut, and Zane Scott is feeling the effects from that claw, holding his mouth as he turns around-

Covert Jay: Right into a Virus of Life!!!

Lieberjosch: Rydell has laid out both Deimos and Zane, but Kenzi is back up and blindsides him with a clothesline that sends him spilling over the ropes to ringside!

Elimination: Dave Rydell by Kenzi Grey-Lacklan

Vinegar: Kenzi turns right into a spinning heel kick from Lockheart, and now Lockheart tries to force her over the ropes.

Lieberjosch: Here comes Sidney Grey again, but Maggie sees her come and preemptively lets go of Kenzi before kicking through the ropes and nearly catching Sid in the face.

Vinegar: Kenzi rolls away, but Lockheart stays on her, grounding her with a knee strike.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: A third of the way through, and here comes Roxy Cotton at number ten!

Lieberjosch: And how smart do Zane and Deimos look now, if they hadn’t put their differences aside a few minutes ago, there would be three of them in there now!

Covert Jay: And nobody would be allowed to sit with anybody!

Vinegar: Cotton slides into the ring and ducks under a clothesline from Lockheart, comes off the ropes with a hip attack!

Lieberjosch: Lockheart rolls to her feet and stumbles to the corner, and Cotton handsprings into an elbow.

Vinegar: The steel cage has begun to lower around the ring, it’s going to happen twice during this match, as Lockheart stumbles out of the corner and right into the One-Hit Wonder from Kenzi!

Covert Jay: The cage has nearly settled into place, and Sid just rolled into the ring!

Lieberjosch: Is she crazy? Why would she come IN right now?

Vinegar: Deimos rolls in just behind her, just half a second before the cage lowers completely, and I think while Grey was preoccupied watching her daughter, Deimos snuck out behind her and brought her into the ring.

Lieberjosch: A steel cage is no place for a Momager.

Covert Jay: Tell Daniel Corvin that.

Vinegar: Kenzi looks appalled that her mother is in the ring, Grey trying desperately to scoot away from Deimos, and Cotton cuts him off and fights him back with forearm shots, but he flapjacks her face first into the steel cage.

Lieberjosch: Kenzi delivers as dropkick from behind, knocking Deimos into the cage wall, as Sidney is doing her best to just stay out of the way!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZ!!!

Vinegar: Number eleven is the Chaos Champion, Le Bord de Dieu!

Covert Jay: And that gets Kenzi’s attention, these two were announced yesterday as facing off in the main event of Chill next week, and it’s going to be a Barbwire Ropes Match!

Vinegar: That’s going to be brutal for sure, as meanwhile Le Bord de Dieu is in no hurry to come down the ramp, and she certainly has nowhere to go with the steel cage currently being down around the ring.

Lieberjosch: Kenzi is glaring at Bordy as she comes down the ramp, but Sidney shouts a warning and Kenzi turns and ducks just in time to avoid a two-handed sledge strike from Zane.

Vinegar: Kenzi backs Scott up with a series of chops to the chest, but Scott counters with a knee lift, and he has Kenzi ready to lift in a gutwrench, but Grey leaps onto his back and tries to choke him.

Lieberjosch: Zane flails for a moment, but he reaches back and grabs hold of Sidney, only for Kenzi to kick him in the injured leg, dropping him to a knee and allowing Sidney to roll off to safety.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Lieberjosch: What is this?

Covert Jay: IT’S THE AVENGER!!!

Vinegar: The Avenger from Carnage Wrestling, we saw him here in UGWC as part of the Lord of Trios tournament, the Avenger is in the Massive Melee!

Lieberjosch: He rushes down the ramp past Le Bord de Dieu, not sure where he thinks he is going, hold on a minute!

Covert Jay: He’s climbing the cage!

Vinegar: The Avenger is climbing the cage, to the bemusement of Le Bord de Dieu, watching from ringside.

Lieberjosch: Meanwhile inside the cage Sidney is shouting at the officials at ringside and demanding to know why the cage doesn’t have a door.

Vinegar: Everybody is back up inside the cage, Deimos, Lockheart, Kenzi, Cotton, Scott, blows being exchanged all over the place, and the Avenger is now perched on top of the cage!

Lieberjosch: He isn’t going to do this?!

Vinegar: JESUS CHRIST ON A POGO STICK!!!!!

Covert Jay: The Avenger just leapt off the top of the cage and took out everybody!

Lieberjosch: Everybody except Sidney Grey, who sits in stunned silence for a moment before resuming her demands that somebody come to ringside and install a door in the cage.

Vinegar: Grey is now on her feet, shouting through the cage, and the crowd roars with delight.

Covert Jay: Sid is confused for a moment as she notices, and she turns around to see the only person on his feet is the Avenger, and he is staring right at her!

Lieberjosch: Sidney shaking the cage now, shouting to get her out, and she looks back just in time to catch a Superhero Kick!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Vinegar: Unlucky number thirteen, or perhaps lucky thirteen, we shall see, and it goes to Mizore Payne!

Lieberjosch: Inside the cage, the Avenger has turned his attention back to the rest of the group, Zane starting to get back to his feet, but the Avenger grabs him by the throat!

Covert Jay: GOOZLE~!

Vinegar: Scott stares at him with confusion, knocks the arm away before returning the favor and lifting the Avenger into Piercing Misery!

Lieberjosch: Mizore has rushed Le Bord de Dieu at ringside, knocking her into the cage and unleashing a swift attack!

Covert Jay: Keep in mind that Bordy has offered a Chaos Title opportunity to anybody that can eliminate her, meaning she put a massive target on her own back!

Vinegar: The cage begins to rise, which means eliminations are once again possible, Zane Scott wasting no time grabbing hold of Deimos, trying to force him out.

Lieberjosch: You didn’t really think that alliance would last, did you?

Vinegar: Cotton and Kenzi are both still in there.

Lieberjosch: There are no allies in the Massive Melee!

Covert Jay: Yeah, okay.

Vinegar: Payne rolls Le Bord into the ring, slides in herself and grabs the Chaos Champion for a spinning neckbreaker.

Lieberjosch: And now Payne grabs Bordy again, she brought her in, now she wants to get her out!

Vinegar: Payne trying to force her over the ropes, but Roxy Cotton grabs Payne from behind and flips her over Bordy and over the ropes entirely!

Elimination: Mizore Payne by Roxy Cotton

Lieberjosch: And no doubt Roxy did it because she wants Bordy to herself, as she now kicks Bordy in the gut and drops her with the Double-D DT!

Vinegar: Lockheart on her before she can capitalize, trying to force her out.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Lieberjosch: Oh, wow.

Vinegar: It’s “Razor” Mark Reznik! We haven’t seen him in years!

Covert Jay: Reznik was one of the Piercing Media Network’s Stars of Tomorrow, the broody musician with a heart of moodiness!

Vinegar: Reznik bringing his guitar with him to the ring, I’m sure that’s a terrible idea.

Lieberjosch: Reznik ignoring everybody as he comes into the ring, looks like he just wants to play his instrument for everyone.

Covert Jay: Zane is having none of this bullshit, as he gives up on eliminating Fear to snatch the guitar away from Reznik, and he smashes it over his head!

Vinegar: Scott just shakes his head as he tosses the remnants of the guitar away, and he picks up Reznik and tosses him like a rag doll over the ropes.

Elimination: Mark Reznik by Zane Scott

Lieberjosch: Zane dusts off his hands, but Deimos is behind him and lifts him into the Numbing!

Vinegar: Deimos is visibly exhausted, he’s been in this match over twenty-five minutes, and he slumps to the ground next to Scott.

Covert Jay: Kenzi is pushing twenty minutes herself.

Vinegar: The Avenger perched up on a turnbuckle as Le Bord shoves Lockheart away, Lockheart ducks under a clothesline from Bordy, springboards into a dropkick that knocks the Avenger off the turnbuckle to ringside!

Elimination: The Avenger by Maggie Lockheart

Lieberjosch: Now Bordy has Lockheart, trying to force her out!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Vinegar: Halfway through, and here comes Jet Somers!

Covert Jay: Opie slides into the ring and ducks under a clothesline attempt by Kenzi, pivoting and spinning into a backfist that knocks her down.

Lieberjosch: Bordy comes at Jet, but he plants his foot and springs into the Kao Loi, knocking her on her back.

Vinegar: Kenzi trying to get back to her feet, but Somers comes off the ropes and drills her with the Chok.

Lieberjosch: Jet on fire here on the night he once again became a Cooperative Champion, he turns his attention to Maggie, but she slides past him into a calf kick.

Covert Jay: Meteorkick!

Vinegar: Deimos is back up and grabs Lockheart from behind, running her to the ropes and tossing her out!

Lieberjosch: But Maggie holds on to the top rope, skins the cat back into the ring.

Covert Jay: Fear has faltered to a knee as he watches her come back in, you know he is always evaluating the current Cross-Hemisphere Champion, whoever it is.

Vinegar: Deimos charges at her again as she lands back on her feet, but she sidesteps him and uses his momentum to send him out!

Elimination: Phrixus Deimos by Maggie Lockheart

Vinegar: Nearly twenty-eight minutes for Deimos in the Melee, but his night is over!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Lieberjosch: What in-?!

Vinegar: Oh, no.

Covert Jay: HUTTAH!!!

Vinegar: *coughing* And with that puff of smoke, Covert Jay has entered the match.

Lieberjosch: At least you and I get a break for a minute.

Covert Jay: DO NOT FORGET THAT WITH THE GLORY OF NINJA REDTOOTH, I CAN CONTINUE TO COMMENTATE FROM IN HERE!

Lieberjosch: I hate this.

Vinegar: At least we know it will be brief.

Covert Jay: THAT’S WHAT YOU THINK! THE TRUE NINJA IS INVINCIBLE, INVULNERABLE, BEYOND REPROACH, AND- oomph!

Vinegar: And eliminated.

Lieberjosch: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Elimination: Covert Jay by Jet Somers

Lieberjosch: HAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Vinegar: Well that was brief.

Covert Jay: Thank you for not describing what actually happened.

Lieberjosch: Oh, tie that towel around your head a little tighter.

Vinegar: Ahem, Somers back to work now, paired up with Lockheart as he tries to force her out of the ring.

Covert Jay: buzz.

Lieberjosch: What’s that? We can’t hear you.

Covert Jay: Fuck off.

Vinegar: Number seventeen is another member of Shakedown, we saw Io earlier and now here comes Venus!

Lieberjosch: Venus scheduled to face Annie Fugate next week on Chill, and you tell me Nicholas, who exactly is supposed to be able to get her over the ropes?

Vinegar: We’ll see who tries, as Venus enters the ring, right away knocking down Kenzi and Cotton with successive clotheslines, and now a belly-to-belly suplex to Le Bord de Dieu!

Lieberjosch: Maggie charges, gets caught in an overhead belly-to-belly suplex!

Vinegar: Somers delivers a Chok!

Lieberjosch: It staggers Venus back to the ropes, Jet rushes over and grabs a leg, that’s not going to do much, but here comes the calvary!

Vinegar: Kenzi, Cotton, Lockheart, and Le Bord all joining Somers in attempting to force Venus over the ropes!

Lieberjosch: They’re not having much success, and in one motion she shoves all of them away!

Vinegar: But Zane Scott rushes in and drills her in the face with a running boot, and the impact sends her spilling over the ropes and crashing to ringside!

Elimination: Venus by Zane Scott

Lieberjosch: Zane got Venus out by himself after the group failed, but his momentum may have taken him too far, he’s a bit hung up on the top rope!

Vinegar: Somers takes advantage, grabbing the other leg, the injured leg, and flipping Scott over the ropes to ringside!

Elimination: Zane Scott by Jet Somers

Lieberjosch: I think at least he landed on something soft, so there’s that.

Vinegar: He landed on Venus.

Lieberjosch: That’s what I said.

Vinegar: In any case, Somers taking a moment to survey the field, as the rest of the participants begin to stir.

Lieberjosch: Aside from Sidney Grey, she’s been lying in that one corner forever, very kind of everyone to let her be.

Covert Jay: I’m good too now, if you were wondering.

Lieberjosch: I wasn’t.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Vinegar: Number eighteen is Necron!

Lieberjosch: The Grim Harvester sauntering to the ring, taking his time as the attention of everyone in the ring turns to this monster coming down the ramp, and Necron climbs up onto the apron and steps over the top rope into the ring, with Jet running right into a right hand.

Vinegar: Clothesline for Kenzi, a boot for Lockheart, Cotton rushes him but he lifts her directly into an overhead press and hurls her to ringside!

Elimination: Roxy Cotton by Necron

Lieberjosch: Pity Venus wasn’t still there to land on.

Vinegar: Necron has hold of Le Bord now, attempting to force her over the ropes as she flails and slaps at him.

Covert Jay: Remember that Bordy promised anybody that eliminated her a shot at the Chaos Title, and you have to imagine Necron would be eager for another crack at her.

Lieberjosch: Bordy has actually wrapped her legs firmly around Necron to prevent her elimination, he is having trouble detaching her.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZ!!!!!!

Vinegar: That seemed fast.

Covert Jay: Well it did take forever for Necron to walk down the ramp, and everybody waited for him.

Vinegar: In any case, Jessica Mathis entering at nineteen, coming down the ramp as meanwhile Kenzi is pulling herself up with the ropes, Somers measuring her.

Lieberjosch: He’s looking for the Chok, but Sidney Grey is up and leaps in the way, Jet connects on her instead!

Vinegar: The awkward collision sends Somers sprawling, Sidney is knocked into Kenzi, and she accidentally shoves her over the ropes and eliminates her!

Elimination: Kenzi Grey-Lacklan by Sidney Grey

Vinegar: Grey stunned by what she just did, staring down over the ropes at Kenzi, as Lockheart sneaks behind her and flips her over the ropes to join her daughter!

Elimination: Sidney Grey by Maggie Lockheart

Vinegar: Over twenty-eight minutes for Kenzi Grey-Lacklan, very impressive performance.

Covert Jay: Over twenty-two for Sidney, but to be fair most of them probably shouldn’t have counted.

Vinegar: Mathis in the ring now, a jumping lariat connects on Lockheart, and the Silverheart brings her to the ropes and attempts to eliminate her.

Lieberjosch: Bordy has resorted to biting Necron, that seems like it is probably unpleasant for both of them, and he finally relents and releases her.

Vinegar: She drops to the mat and immediately leaps up basically throws her body at him, scratching and clawing, and she catches him enough off-balance for him to stumble back into the corner.

Covert Jay: Bordy jumps onto the second rope, getting leverage on him in the corner and raining blows upon him, until he finally just shoves her away, launching her across the ring.

Vinegar: Necron collects himself, appears to be bleeding from scratches on his face, if you believe that’s possible for this monster to be doing, and now he starts to cross the ring.

Covert Jay: JETSTREAMER!

Vinegar: Somers caught Necron with the Jetstreamer, and the monster is down!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZ!!!

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: Entrant number twenty is Alan Wallace!

Lieberjosch: Here comes Vain, and here comes the cage!

Vinegar: The steel cage lowering for the second time in this match, and Wallace appears unconcerned, walking around the ring rather than entering it.

Covert Jay: Jem rolls out in pursuit of him, but Vain simply pivots, sidestepping her and using her momentum to launch her back into the ring, just as the cage lowers around it.

Lieberjosch: And now Vain goes to the timekeeper’s table, he is taking a steel chair and setting it up in front of us at ringside, looks like he is just going to take things in for a bit.

Vinegar: And with the cage now down, participants inside are once again safe from elimination for a few minutes, but obviously not safe from the cage itself.

Covert Jay: Jet Somers, the forty-seven time Cooperative Warlord, going to work now on the Silverheart, three left jabs and a right hook, she stumbles off the cage wall, Opie takes her down with the Suicide Pull.

Vinegar: Somers unleashes the ground-and-pound, unleashing a vicious and brutal attack on the downed Mathis, as Wallace remains expressionless on the outside.

Lieberjosch: Bordy is now running in place on Necron’s back, I imagine that’s going to end badly at some point.

Covert Jay: Opie catches a knee to the side of the head from Maggie!

Lieberjosch: You need to constantly keep your head on a swivel in the Massive Melee, it might be easier to do that now for Jet considering how hard that knee was.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZ!!!! Also, fuck Jet.

Vinegar: Twenty-one is Travis Pierce, the now former Cross-Hemisphere Champion. Fuck Jet?

Covert Jay: Did I stutter?

Lieberjosch: No, but you mumble through your bath towel sometimes.

Vinegar: I thought you were a “TWiSTeD ninja” fan.

Covert Jay: He hasn’t been that for years, and we’re in a fight now over what he just did to me.

Lieberjosch: You mean when he-

Covert Jay: I’d really prefer we don’t talk about it and leave the past in the past.

Lieberjosch: YOU just brought it up!

Vinegar: In any case, Pierce has made his way to ringside, Wallace glances at him and Pierce puts his hands up to indicate there is apparently no need for hostilities, I’ll be honest and say I don’t think Wallace was getting up regardless.

Lieberjosch: Pierce seems to be looking for his own chair, Vain yells at him to get his own idea.

Covert Jay: Bordy leaps in the air for a big stomp and Necron, but he rolls over, sits up, and catches her.

Vinegar: From the seated position, Necron impressively hurls her into the cage wall, and now he gets to his feet and catches and charging Lockheart before doing the same to her.

Lieberjosch: Necron now begins going to each competitor in turn, hurling them one at a time into the steel cage.

Covert Jay: I feel like this could go on for awhile.

Vinegar: At least until the cage goes back up.

Lieberjosch: Maybe he thinks he can eventually throw one of them through it.

Covert Jay: Maybe he doesn’t realize it’s there.

Vinegar: How could he not realize it’s there?

Covert Jay: He looks like walking death, how can you be sure he can even see?

Lieberjosch: You’re suggesting the fact that bodies keep bouncing back at him is confusing him.

Covert Jay: Probably pissing him off too, I imagine.

Vinegar: Pierce is now sharing popcorn with a fan while he watches the mayhem in the cage.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Vinegar: There she is, the number twenty-two entrant is Sarah Selena Lacklan.

Lieberjosch: The Red Queen returns to action, here in the Massive Melee!

Covert Jay: TOTES!

Vinegar: Lacklan coming down the ramp, she is wearing braces on both knees, the lasting effects of the terrible accident she was in last year.

Lieberjosch: Pierce certainly took notice of her coming down the ramp, I think Vain even shifted in his seat.

Covert Jay: And Necron is still heaving people into the cage on a rotating basis. I have to say, it’s thoughtful of him to make sure everybody gets a turn.

Vinegar: The cage beginning to raise, and we expect it to be up for the duration of the match now.

Covert Jay: I wonder if Necron will find that disappointing.

Lieberjosch: Pierce slides in, he is careful not to pass within view of Necron, and he goes right for Bordy, and not the person that took his title a couple hours ago.

Covert Jay: Travis Pierce is a forward thinking person. He lost the Cross-Hemisphere Title, but if he can eliminate Bordy, then he has a Chaos Title shot to work with.

Vinegar: Lacklan into the ring, she has officially returned to action, and the first thing she does is connect with a Cop Killa on Lockheart!

Lieberjosch: Sarah notices Pierce attempting to eliminate Bordy and chooses to ignore it, instead trying to lift Maggie and get her out. How long has she been in there?

Covert Jay: It’s over a half hour now.

Vinegar: Necron trying to get Somers out, Somers has his arms and legs wrapped around the top rope, that’s about all he can do about it. Mathis stumbles to her feet and charges at Pierce, but he sees her coming and pivots to backdrop her over the ropes, allowing Le Bord to drop safely back into the ring.

Lieberjosch: Mathis lands safely on the apron, but as she turns back around Pierce grabs her by the head.

Covert Jay: THE TRUTH HURTS!!!

Vinegar: Through the ropes, Mathis launched to ringside!

Elimination: Jessica Mathis by Travis Pierce

Vinegar: Mathis landed directly in front of Wallace, he stands while holding the chair in place and shifts two steps to the right before sitting back down.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Vinegar: Eden Morgan is next at twenty-three!

Covert Jay: Edie won the Cooperative Titles for the second time this year earlier tonight.

Lieberjosch: And this is enough for Vain to stand up, he begins to walk around the ring as Eden is coming down the ramp, and when she spots him she immediately stops.

Vinegar: Morgan is telling ringside officials to keep Wallace away from her, there really isn’t anything they can do about it, they’re both entered into the Melee.

Lieberjosch: Eden backing away as Vain keeps coming, and she turns and runs back up the ramp, with Vain chasing her all the way backstage.

Vinegar: Necron nearly has Somers forced out, but Pierce kicks him in the back of the leg, and Necron simply turns around and glares at him.

Lieberjosch: Pierce knows he fucked up, slowly backing away, but Jet lands back on his feet and springboards off the ropes onto Necron’s back, attempting to choke him.

Vinegar: Pierce goes back on the offense, kicking repeatedly at Necron’s legs until he drops to a knee, and Somers transitions to a headlock and begins repeatedly striking him with his elbow.

Covert Jay: Necron is wearing down, and Pierce capitalizes on the opportunity to pie face him.

Lieberjosch: Jet hesitates a moment to give Pierce a questioning look, and the enraged Necron flings Jet off into the corner before grabbing Pierce and pulling him into the Reaper!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!

Vinegar: Number twenty four is Elizabeth Blackwell!

Lieberjosch: Lacklan pushes Maggie over the ropes, Maggie lands safely on the apron as Blackwell slides into the ring, charges at Lacklan but runs right into a shining wizard.

Vinegar: Lacklan has to pause to adjust her knee brace, as Necron charges and splashes Somers in the corner, Jet Somers perhaps reconsidering the brief Piercing Weapons reunion that just occurred.

Covert Jay: Bordy flings herself at Maggie as the latter is trying to get back up, Maggie stumbling back into the corner, Bordy rushes at her and furiously stomps her down.

Lieberjosch: Pierce gets Lacklan’s attention and tries to sell her on double-teaming Necron, she appears to tell him that she likes him, but not that much.

Vinegar: So Pierce instead turns his attention to Blackwell, he lifts her for Signing Off, she floats off and shoves him away, only to get drilled by a Cop Killa.

Lieberjosch: Pierce is shoved into Necron, who slowly turns around as Pierce rolls his eyes and braces for impact, but everybody’s attention is diverted by a commotion on the stage.

Covert Jay: They’re back!

Vinegar: Wallace has Morgan duct taped to a rolling chair and is pushing her back down the ramp to the ring, looks like they’ll be joining this match after all.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!

Vinegar: Lindsay Bunny entering at twenty-five!

Lieberjosch: She rushes down the ramp and blindsides Vain, it knocks over the chair that Eden is strapped to.

Covert Jay: Bunny grabs hold of Vain and shoves him into the ring, where Necron eagerly accepts this generous gift.

Vinegar: Bunny into the ring herself, goes right for Blackwell, they exchange blows in the center of the ring.

Lieberjosch: Lacklan comes off the ropes, drills both Blackwell and Bunny with a double shining wizard!

Covert Jay: Necron lifts Vain up, plants him with Judgement Day!

Vinegar: Lacklan rips Blackwell up off the mat and tosses her over the ropes to eliminate her!

Elimination: Elizabeth Blackwell by Sarah Lacklan

Vinegar: Necron turns his attention to Lacklan, she attempts to scamper away as Le Bord charges at Pierce, who catches her in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.

Lieberjosch: Eden has escaped her bonds, Vain looks knocked for a loop as he is using the ropes to pull himself up, Eden slides in the ring and sneaks behind him and tries to shove him out!

Vinegar: Wallace blocks it and spins around, Morgan trips over herself backing away and tactically rolls out of the ring, that was under the bottom rope.

Lieberjosch: Vain starts to follow her, but gets blindsided by Jet, who stomps him into the corner.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!

Vinegar: Twenty-six is the Fire-Breathing Dragon, Jen Houlihan, another member of the Zodiac!

Covert Jay: DRRRRRRRRRAGGONNNNNN!!!!

Vinegar: Necron is driving Lacklan into the corner with shoulder thrusts, Houlihan slides into the ring and joins with Bunny, and together they attack Necron.

Covert Jay: Pierce has got Bordy at the ropes, he’s trying to force her out, he wants that title shot.

Lieberjosch: Eden is watching Jet stomp away on Vain in the ring, but she backs right into Maggie Lockheart, who had left the ring herself and came around behind her. Maggie grabs Eden and hurls her into the barricade.

Covert Jay: Maggie has a bone to pick with all of the Court, and speaking of bones, the Zodiac is attempting to double suplex Necron, but he blocks it and lifts them each into separate vertical suplexes with each arm!

Vinegar: Pierce nearly has Le Bord over the ropes, but she swings her legs around and wraps them around his neck, pulling him along with her, and she lands on the apron and he gets dumped to ringside!

Elimination: Travis Pierce by Le Bord de Dieu

Lieberjosch: Vain has managed to actually turn the tables on Jet, it’s now Vain attempting to force Jet out.

Vinegar: Lockheart sends Morgan into the ring, slides in and connects with the Event Horizon!

Lieberjosch: Maggie springboards for a follow-up, but Necron swats her out of the way on his way to go attack Vain.

Vinegar: It frees up Somers to check on Morgan, he helps her up before she glares at Lockheart, she executes Entropy before Somers follows up with the Blackout!

Covert Jay: The Silent Flight!

Lieberjosch: But as Jet is getting back to his feet, Necron grabs him from behind and hurls him over the ropes!

Elimination: Jet Somers by Necron

Lieberjosch: Eden looks stunned at the display of power by Necron, who now begins stalking Eden, she might be next!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Covert Jay: AHOY!!!

Vinegar: Captain ‘80s is number twenty-seven!

Lieberjosch: The Captain is psyching himself up as he comes down the ramp, and his nonsense has the attention of Necron.

Covert Jay: He’s like the anti-Necron, so vibrant and full of life.

Vinegar: Captain ‘80s into the ring, facing off with Necron, the Captain already breathing heavily and he points at Necron, but the Zodiac swarm him.

Covert Jay: Lindsay Bunny faces Captain ‘80s in a Last Man Standing Match next week on Chill, taking advantage of the opportunity to start the process now!

Vinegar: Bunny and Houlihan beat the Captain down, they force him over to the ropes and stomp away on him, but the Captain rises to his feet and begins shaking the ropes violently before turning around, grabbing them both by the head, and slamming their heads together!

Covert Jay: It’s a meeting of the minds!

Vinegar: The Captain moves out of the way as Necron comes charging in with a double clothesline that sends both Houlihan and Bunny spilling to ringside!

Eliminations: Jen Houlihan and Lindsay Bunny by Necron

Vinegar: Necron turns his attention back to Morgan again as Wallace has forced Captain ‘80s to a corner and is attempting to force him out.

Covert Jay: The Captain is shouting things in all caps at him as Vain struggles to try to get him out.

Lieberjosch: Sometimes I feel like things can’t get more ridiculous.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!

Lieberjosch: Nevermind, forget I said anything.

Covert Jay: It’s Bartholomew Ramsbottom!

Lieberjosch: I can’t.

Covert Jay: The Council of Mutton has sent him here to seek championsheep glory!

Lieberjosch: I’m paying for all my sins.

Vinegar: Ramsbottom waving emphatically to Bunny and Houlihan as he passes them on the ramp.

Lieberjosch: Vain having trouble with the Captain, who appears to be fending off his efforts at eliminating him merely by shouting at him.

Covert Jay: Maybe he should try to prognosticate a bro hug.

Vinegar: Necron has Morgan pinned against a turnbuckle, but he shifts his attention as the Eater of Grass rolls into the ring, and Necron immediately slams into him with a clothesline that sends him right out!

Elimination: Bartholomew Ramsbottom by Necron

Lieberjosch: Necron is my new favorite.

Covert Jay: Bordy flings herself at Necron, but he scoops her onto his shoulders and snake eyes her onto a turnbuckle.

Vinegar: The Chaos Champion stumbles, and Necron comes off the ropes and slams into her with a clothesline that sends her spilling to the outside!

Elimination: Le Bord de Dieu by Necron

Vinegar: The Chaos Champion eliminated, she lasted in the Massive Melee for over thirty-five minutes, and by her own stipulation this means Necron will receive a future shot at her title.

Lieberjosch: I don’t think that is on his mind right now, Nicholas, he’s looking to win this entire thing and he’s already eliminated six people by himself.

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

Vinegar: What an opportunity for Kem Dynamo, coming in at twenty-nine!

Covert Jay: The Pro Wrestling Podcast Group had Kem ranked at number one on their Massive Melee Countdown over the weekend, and this is a phenomenal entrance position, they might just turn out to be right!

Vinegar: It doesn’t get much better than twenty-nine.

Lieberjosch: Sure it does. Thirty.

Vinegar: Dynamo slides into the ring and right away takes Necron down with an STO!

Lieberjosch: I think that took the Grim Harvester by surprise.

Vinegar: Spinning heel kick knocks down Morgan, and another to Lacklan!

Lieberjosch: Lockheart is up but Dynamo plants her with a DDT!

Covert Jay: Captain ‘80s finally fends Vain off with the power of relentless shouting, but as he comes back into the ring Kem catches him in the face with a rolling Koppu kick, the Captain is knocked back over the ropes, but AHOY, he lands on the apron!

Lieberjosch: And Vain springboards into a Money Maker that pulls the Captain into the top rope and sling shots him into the air to ringside!

Elimination: Captain ‘80s by Alan Wallace

Lieberjosch: Vain just bitch-slapped the eighties back three decades!

Covert Jay: BUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: And how fitting is it, the final entrant into the 2018 Massive Melee is Lucky.

Lieberjosch: The former Chaos Champion running down and sliding in, but Eden is on him immediately, twisting his arm and pulling him right into the Fall of Eden!

Vinegar: The impact causes him to stumble back and tumble over the ropes to ringside!

Covert Jay: So...not lucky?

Elimination: Lucky by Eden Morgan

Vinegar: Wallace has Dynamo pinned against a turnbuckle just a few feet from Morgan, they’ve locked eyes, each trying to quickly decide the move to make!

Lieberjosch: LACKLAN UPENDS EDEN AND SENDS HER OVER THE ROPES!!!

Elimination: Eden Morgan by Sarah Lacklan
Vinegar: Morgan eliminated, she didn’t see Lacklan coming because she was focused on Wallace, and Wallace seems to hesitate a moment as he sees Morgan sprawled at ringside, giving Dynamo an opening to knock him away with a forearm.

Covert Jay: Vain staggers right into a pele kick from the Red Queen, and she really hasn’t looked like there is any of this mythical ring rust at all.

Vinegar: Dynamo coming out of the corner, Necron is back up and charges, but Dynamo sidesteps him and delivers an enziguri kick, and Necron’s momentum takes him over the ropes and tumbling to ringside!

Elimination: Necron by Kem Dynamo

Vinegar: And just like that, we are down to four!

Lieberjosch: Kem Dynamo and Sarah Lacklan, two former WrestleStock Cup winners, staring at each other across the ring, Maggie and Vain both getting back to their feet, we have four corners, four Entertainment Professionals, and one is going to WrestleStock to challenge Lucy Wylde for the World Championship!

Vinegar: They’re all waiting to see who makes the first move, and it’s Lacklan going for Lockheart, Lockheart ducking under a clothesline and chopping her in the chest.

Lieberjosch: Smart play, Maggie has been in there longer than the other three combined, but she still has fight in her yet!

Vinegar: Dynamo has managed to overpower Wallace, clubbing him to the mat with blows to the neck.

Lieberjosch: Maggie has Sarah in the corner, but Sarah drops to the mat, pulling Maggie with her and driving her face into the turnbuckle!

Vinegar: Lacklan back up, and she is trying to force Lockheart out now.

Covert Jay: Kem sends Vain off the ropes, but he comes back with a leaping crossbody tackle that takes her down!

Vinegar: Lockheart manages to kick Lacklan away, drops back safely into the ring.

Lieberjosch: But Vain slams into her with a clothesline that sends her sprawling over the ropes!

Elimination: Maggie Lockheart by Alan Wallace

Covert Jay: Maggie is out!

Vinegar: Over fifty-one minutes for Maggie Lockheart, a record for sure, what an incredible performance by her here in Cleveland tonight!

Covert Jay: Not to mention, also the new Cross-Hemisphere Champion.

Lieberjosch: Her night ended by Vain, now Dynamo looks to do the same to Lacklan, but Lacklan pulls down the top rope, Dynamo goes spilling over it!

Vinegar: But she has the top rope! Dynamo holds on to the top rope, Hazel East and Sam Green are both right there, she is safe as she pulls herself back to the apron.

Lieberjosch: COP KILLA TO VAIN!!!

Vinegar: But Dynamo is back in the ring and she grabs Lacklan from behind, running her to the ropes and hurling her over them to ringside!

Elimination: Sarah Lacklan by Kem Dynamo

Vinegar: We are down to two!

Lieberjosch: Impressive return by Sarah Lacklan to ring action, looking forward to seeing what comes next for you, but now it is down to Alan Wallace and Kem Dynamo!

Vinegar: Wallace is still down from the Cop Killa, and Dynamo goes for the Hangover, but Wallace rolls out of the way!

Covert Jay: Vain to his feet, and he grabs Kem and hits the Cherry Popper!

Vinegar: Wallace to the second rope, and he waves for Dynamo to get back to her feet, she is slow to get up.

Lieberjosch: MONEY MAKER!!

Lieberjosch: Kem caught him!

Vinegar: Dynamo caught Wallace out of the air as he was going for the Money Maker, and she turns and drops him over the ropes to eliminate him!

Lieberjosch: It’s over!

Dennis: Here is your winner of the 2018 Massive Melee...KEMMMM DYNNNNAAMMMOOOOOO!!!!

Vinegar: Kem Dynamo did it!

Lieberjosch: It was the biggest Massive Melee in history, and it was won by Kem Dynamo!

Vinegar: And now the former WrestleStock Cup winner will be returning to the festival with the opportunity to win the World Championship!

Covert Jay: We’ll see you in two weeks, but between now and then, make sure you CHILL!

[Lord Hastings]

Credits

GFX
Britt

Cross-Hemisphere Championship
Ad

No Holds Barred
Chad

Cooperative Champioship
Brandon

World Championship
Ad

The Massive Melee
Steve

[Lord Hastings]

Did you stay after the credits?

You're the best!

We leave you with this...

Kenzi shakes her head, trying to clear cobwebs from the gruesome Massive Melee, as she walks through the halls of the arena. She needed to find her friends, needed to find-

“You have no idea, child...”

She stops cold at the French accent of Le Bord de Dieu. Bordy appears from seemingly nowhere and makes her way towards Kenzi. Bordy is clearly disturbed, her body shaking and lathered on sweat from her own exertion in the Melee.

Le Bord de Dieu: What-

Bordy rushes forward and grabs Kenzi's hand, very similar to how Kenzi took hers on Friday when they had their latest argument. Bordy had seemed agitated on that day after seeing her with Sarah. She had stormed off after leaving a cryptic message about Bible passages from Exodus. Kenzi had meant to look it up, but frankly she had let it fall by the wayside to focus on her wife making her surprise debut tonight. Seeing Bordy even more agitated brought the memory of that encounter back as the crazed woman squeezed her hand, hurting it.

Le Bord de Dieu: ...what I have done...

Kenzi hisses as Bordy's grip tightens and her nails dig into her skin. ‘What is she talking about?’ Kenzi thought to herself though the pain of the woman’s grip on her.

Le Bord de Dieu: ...to encourage him...to push him...to give him strength...

Kenzi Grey-Lacklan: Him…who are you tal-

Kenzi's breath catches as she realizes just who she means…

Kenzi Grey-Lacklan: Jacob…it was you?

Kenzi’s blood ran cold and the look in Ava's eyes goes truly wild.

Le Bord de Dieu: ...I did not mean to push him to do what he did...

She pants deeply.

Le Bord de Dieu: ...but I do not regret that he did it. A life stolen to replace what I lost. Out of the Word itself: An eye for an eye.

There is a long pregnant pause as Kenzi stands there, her mouth agape as she looks at her would-be mother-in-law, her emotions swirling around in a brutal storm of inner turmoil as memories from late last year came rushing back at her. Jacob Hargrave had pursued her wife…assaulting her…drugging her…nearly killing her…nearly killing them…

THUMP

Kenzi’s heart thunders in her chest, rocking her like a blow from a sledgehammer. Sarah had always been a bitch, but love had smoothed her roughhewn edges, paving the way for a union that had saved both of them from self-destruction…

THUMP THUMP

From the moment the first call came that Sarah had been kidnapped by Jacob, to the terrifyingly agonizing moments that she watched the police chase unfurl…then the horrific car crash…

THUMP THUMP THUMP

Sarah lying in a hospital bed, bruised, bloodied, and broken. Her light in this cruel world growing dimmer and dimmer…until she disappeared. The screaming…all she heard was the screaming…

THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP

Blood flew with each painful blow, her arms driving like pistons; her fists smashing into the bitch’s smug face. Kenzi was in a blind fury like she’d never been before. The commotion around her as Security rushes in was like white noise. Hands grabbing for her were shoved away and she roared, taking twin handfuls of her blonde hair as she lifts and pounds her head into the concrete, trying to spit it open like am over-ripe coconut…

THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP

The Chaos Champion was left a bloody mess by the time Kenzi is dragged away, kicking and screaming…cursing and spitting, driven mad with grief, anger, and violence. EMTs rush over to the badly beaten woman to tend to her injuries. Her face is a crimson mask, her hair stained a neon pink from the lacerations in her scalp…yet still…a soft cackle escapes from between her swollen and busted lips…

This was not over…in fact…it was only just beginning…

[Magdalena Lockheart]

I was up at 4 this morning giving this show a first read through and wow. I can't say enough to the matchwriters and the staff that put these ppvs together. Absolutely incredible. You all make it so that I cannot just skip the finer details that you work so hard to put in literally every moment. Brit, awesome graphics as usual! And Lacklan? Kenzi? Did you write that post credits scene? That is some damn good storytelling.

Ad, I loved the match. Keep up the great work. That goes to everyone. Great f'n job! Now onto the next

[cooltubesource]

Killer job as awesome, bossman! And the match writing was as on point as ever. From Sar punching Mags in the face as soon as she stepped foot in the ring to "momager" making the card, this was stellar.

Jun 5, 2018 8:56:42 GMT -5 Magdalena Lockheart said:

And Lacklan? Kenzi? Did you write that post credits scene? That is some damn good storytelling.

TL;DR version: Yes. And coming from you, that is a welcomed and appreciated compliment.

Unnecessarily verbose version: We had planned on Bordy vs. Kenzi for the first Chill, but we had to delay until the second on due to Ken being out of town that week, as I wanted us to have fun with our first ever match against one another as handlers. I had to no-sell JC's challenge to Bordy for Chill #2 IC because I knew OOC that we were headlining in some crazy violent match. Kenzi as a character is slow to anger but then she goes NUCLEAR when she is, so I knew that this reveal would be something to push her into "gonna kill a bitch" mode. The original concept was for the reveal and subsequent beatdown to be the end of the gimmick we did in our Melee promos (same scene done from different POVs), but Ken tossed out the idea that since it is such a big moment in our story, that it should be a seg on a PPV. He was totally right and so BLAMO! Our post credit scene. The premise is mine but the emotion of the actual beatdown is all Ken. I HATE when he one-ups me like that!!!!

[Deleted]

This was an amazing show.

It was the thing I was most exciting about coming into this week, and considering that Coheed & Cambria dropped new material and Joe Hendry announced he was coming to Impact Wrestling during the same period, I hope everyone understand what a galactic compliment that is. Lol

The matches were great. I loved how much work the commentary team put into establishing exactly why Maggie and Pierce wanted to kill each other. Calling back Maggie’s RP was a great touch because far too often the RP Board and the results are treated like two separate worlds that don’t cross. I liked using quotes from previous results to set the table for Zane/Fear, and I don’t understand why DDTing body parts besides the head isn’t used more often (putting a dude in a hammerlock then spiking the wrist to the canvas sounds like it could actually do absurd amounts of damage to the hand, wrist, shoulders, and/or lower back). I found it hilarious that Lieberjosch was so anti-CoolKids “running amok with no sense of structure”; added a #GetOffMyLawn vibe to the standard heel commentary.

And the World Title match. Wow. The mask...the chain...the amazing use of the referee as a narrative point that managed to add to the match instead of take away from it (seriously why the Hell aren’t efeders in WWE Creative and Booking?!? WHY?!?!?)...and the ending, where instead of kickouts at 2.99, having Lucy get the absolute feel-good moment of hitting the Trifecta on Baal...the pop in the arena when she hit WL would have been deafening. Literally deafening. They would have needed to bring in sign language interpreters for the Main event. I’m sure of it.

And then the Massive Melee itself!
-I feel bad for Fear. It feels like he gets one of the first 5 spots every single time. I can only imagine how many times he’d‘ve won this event with a little better luck of the draw.
-Having 30 people in the event was really fun. It allowed for more of the surprise entrants that the Royal Rumble is known for. I had no idea that Sidney Grey was actually gonna show up but I marked out when she did. Lol
-The callback to Covert Jay’s previous run in the Melee was awesome.
-Steve asked for permission to include Venus and Io, but damned if my heart didn’t stop each time Shakedown played. I was escorting a Soldier to Basic Leader Course school when I read the results and he actually noticed enough to ask when I cursed out loud until I saw that it was Io, not Kem, that was out at 4. Of course, I had to explain that I was part of a fantasy-wrestling game and I thought I had gotten a very unlucky draw in the Royal Rumble-style event my character was competing in. That went well, all things considered.
-I was flattered that the Jay sold my MMB results as hard as they did, especially with Maggie’s entrance. And then I laughed at loud when Hans no-sold it. (Again, my Soldier was standing right there the entire time.)
-Zane kicking Vaughn while Fear didn’t flinch was awesome. (That moment when you realize Fear = Pentagon Jr + mic skills, and I mean that as high praise)
-Le Bord putting a bounty on her own head was cool. And I love that Mizore and Necron were the first ones to really go after that. Recently it has felt like there are actual divisions within UGWC which I think is great for long-term storytelling such as this
-I appreciated the rub of Venus temporarily overpowering 5 other wrestlers, and I think it made it all the more impressive when Zane’s foot did what they couldn’t. And yes, “he landed on something soft” was fantastic. Clever acknowledgement of her size without sophomoric ridicule. Loved it.
-only thing better than Vain having a seat while the cage lowered would’ve been him
bouncing Jay from the announcers table and doing a little color commentary while he waited.
-“Jet Somers, 47-time Co-Operative Warlord”. BWAHAHAHAHA
-Necron taking turns throwing everyone into the cage had me crying. I need @totaldivaseps to GIF it ASAP.
-Marked out when SSL came out. Super excited to see her back. Can’t decide if I want Baal/Maggie or SSL/Maggie more for WS18
-I liked that Steve gave this one some leeway as far as when eliminations took place. For example, letting Bunny stay in long enough to interact with both her partner and Captain 80s. Chill2 got a lot of setup all through this match.

Finally, I just want people to know that my little rankings thing was not a work. I started the project of charting those numbers with no idea how it was gonna work out. I got lucky that it worked out so perfectly from a narrative standpoint.

That said, I don’t think I can explain how hard I fist-pumped when I realized that the system correctly picked 5 of the final 6. When math wins, the world is a better place.

[Harvey the Grim]

Fucking fantastic card from start to finish. Really intense, powerful, emotionally charged matches, that really drew you in, great writing all of you. The spectacle of the melee itself, with the whopping 30 entrants, and the 2 random steel cage drops I thought were a very clever way to spice up and put a new twist on a time tested wrestling cliche. It's incredible Kem's system got 5 out of the 6 finalists right, behold the powers of math! And the ending...wow. Just...I thought the match between Lucy and Baal was emotional, but this one...this one may make that pale in comparison. Awesome writing from both Kenzi and Bordy.

[Maya Jensen]

Disappointed I had to no show... but ah well.

Just needed to note that Lindsey's name was spelled wrong.