Sentinel 27/09/09 Results

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: Welcome to Sentinel. The card tonight looks like it should be a good old time.

Hanson: If anyone turns up.

Vinegar: now what makes you say that?

Hanson: Just a feeling. But at least there is Blessed Immortality at the end of the tunnel...

Vinegar: In a Tag Team Title match no less, but we’ve also got three other great matches ahead...

Hanson: Look do you think they really merit talking about, couldn’t we just cut to some backstage segment...

Vinegar: Funnily enough...

Backstage, Raenius sits in his dressing room running his fingers through his hair as he swigs from a bottle of Jim Beam Black. Until his manageress, Nyx, disturbs his reverie as she sticks her head through the door.

Nyx: Raenius, you, uh… you’ve got a visitor.

Raenius: And who the fuck might want an audience with me, hmm?

Voice: Me…

He nearly chokes on his whiskey when he hears the voice, growling in vehemence as the woman walks in past Nyx, pushing her aside ignorantly. As she walks up to the Resident Evil, her dress, dangerously décolleté, exposing most of her shoulders, plunges down in a v shape towards her mid-section and only covers a small section of her legs. The light blue cloth writhes and shivers like a winter ghost, matching exactly the colour of the eyes that stare at our hero from behind her wavy black hair.

Raenius: Christ. And what dirty fuck of a rock did you crawl out of, Lilith?

Lilith makes a small moue of her mouth before pouting at him.

Lilith: Now that’s not very nice, is that any way to greet an old friend?

Raenius: Were we friends? Was that it? Cause I thought what it was was a professional relationship between us. Me being me and you being my brother’s pincushion.

Lilith waves a hand impatiently, dismissing his words as unimportant, never being one to allow a hollow insult from a drunk to get to her.

Lilith: I’ll let that slide, Raenius, just to let bygones be bygones and start anew with you?

Raenius: Get to the fucking point. You obviously want something or else you wouldn’t have slithered in here. What the fuck is it?

Lilith sighs and her shoulders droop just a bit, the change so slight only the most observant would notice. When her eyes next pierce Raenius they are cold and calculating.

Lilith: I want Salem.

Raenius: Miss his strong, comforting arms, do we?

Lilith: I know what’s been going on here and what is planned to go on. I want in on it. I want Salem back from that white trash, trailer park slut. And you’re going to help me.

Raenius: Well Jesus Harold fucking Christ, is that all? You want the moon, too, while we’re at it? How about one of those orgasm things I’ve heard so much about? Mine might be at war with his, but he’s still my brother. So do feel free to fuck right off, hmm?

Hearing enough, Raenius stands and stalks to the door, throwing it open and gesturing for Lilith to leave. She obliges him and moves gracefully towards the door, stopping just inside of it to turn slightly, speaking to him over her shoulder.

Lilith: It’s a pity you feel that way. I mean, after all, if you knew what your wife owed me, I’m almost certain you wouldn’t be so… nasty.

She pauses over the last word, emphasizing it and giving Raenius a little smirk before leaving him to his thoughts.

Hanson: Thank god for Raenius and his new hot friend....

Vinegar: Didn’t sound all that friendly to me...

Hanson: Who cares, in that time we’ve managed to get ready for the first match...and whats this...

Vinegar: Dan, has just been handed a piece of paper folks...

Hanson: Man, I thought this night couldn’t get any better, not only will Travis and The Lord Chief be ending the night as Tag Team Champions, now this it’s phenomenal....

Vinegar: What?

Hanson: Dylan James cannot make it to the arena, and will not be returning to GIW in the foreseeable future, apparently Old Lady Levene was worried about his latest proclamations, y’know the crazy bat shit vampire stuff, and she sent a psyche evaluation team around to whatever slum he calls home, and they’ve deemed him a hazard to himself and others, and he’s being transported directly to an Insane Asylum...

Vinegar: Wait, let me get this straight...Dylan James...

Hanson: Is too crazy even for GIW? Exactly, finally things begin to make sense...

Dennis: The Next match is scheduled for one fall, and is for the GIW.Com Championship.

“Storm Front”

Dennis: Introducing the challenger, from Townsville, Australia....JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

Vinegar: You gotta admire this kid, he knows each and every week he is up against it, and that the odds are stacked against him, but despite that he just keeps on going. He’s certainly got determination.

Hanson: And once again he’s come out full of enthusiasm for his umpteenth shot at the GIW.com title, despite the fact we all know precisely what the result will be, I don’t think I’ve ever truly appreciated the concept pity before now. Look at him, like a puppy all excited to see the owner that it knows is gonna sexually molest it, but just hopes this time he’ll get a different type of bone.

Vinegar: Harsh...

Hanson: But can you dispute the fact that Nathan Korpi is most likely to cripple JK. The dudes big, and he’s green....and I don’t mean like Bruce Banner when he gets angry...

Vinegar: I can’t dispute it, no.

“All Nightmare Long”

Dennis: And introducing next, his opponent and the GIW.COM CHAMPION....hailing from the Twin Citi...Oh, what....ok then, if you say so....Hailing from...really?...ok....The Barbarian Highlands...NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATHAAAAAAAAN KOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPI!!!!

The intro to Metallica’s anthemic “All Nightmare Long” builds slowly, the initial slow-tempo low-end noodling eventually being replaced by guitar and drums at a frantic pace that belies the fact that 3/4 of this band has been at this for the better part of thirty years.

The long-awaited full brunt of the song hits after more than a full minute of intro, punctuated by a respectable amount of fireworks from the entryway. Nathan Korpi emerges from behind the curtain, and stands on the ramp with hands on his hips. He stands there looking around at the crowd for several moments, smiling like a big kid, pointing at fans here and there. The song continues, a catchy groove that goes on for another half minute or so.

With a satisfied nod, Nate begins to make his way slowly down the entrance ramp towards the ring. He pauses here and there to smack hands with whichever fans care enough to hold theirs out. His progress is slow, since he allows fans plenty of time for people to make up their minds about whether or not his friendly demeanor overcomes his long hair, thick bushy beard, and horribly offensive death metal t-shirt.

Reaching the ringside area at last, Nate hurriedly clambers onto the ring apron, sliding under the bottom rope and standing up in the ring. He raises his fists in the classic Rocky pose, soaking in the modest cheers and applause of the crowd. The song fades out, and Nate readies himself for battle.

Vinegar: The Champion is looking in fine shape today...

Hanson: I’m not rating JK’s chances right now if I’m being honest with you.

Vinegar: Did you rate them before?

Hanson: Well...no.

Vinegar: Hazel East hands the title belt out of the ring after giving JK what’s probably his last look at the title for at least another week or so...

Hanson: And Nate springs into action and goes for JK with a thunderous cloithesline, and JK goes down...

Vinegar: But Kip’s right back up, and as Nate turns around catches him with a spinning heel kick. Which rocks Nate backwards into the ropes...a surprising start from JK, he runs the other ropes and then dives at Korpi...

Hanson: But the Nordic nightmare bends down and launches JK over the top rope to the arena below...looks like that promising start is fading into the same old story...

Vinegar: As ever JK is being resilient and is back on his feet once more and slides into the ring...

Hanson: And directly into the boot’s of Nathan Korpi, who I imagine is wondering why he’s being forced to face a teenager once more...

Vinegar: And now Korpi lifts JK to his feet...

Hanson: And he wants this over early...he hoists him up...CRASH COURSE IN BRAIN SURGER....WHAT!?!?!?[/b]

Vinegar: JK shifts his weight...manages to escape, wrap his legs around Nate’s neck....HURRICANRANA...HOLDS THE LEGS...

1...

Vinegar: Surely not...

2...

Hanson: This can’t be happening...

3!!!!

Hanson: Armageddon is upon us, ‘The Cylcone’ is a Champion!?!?!?

Dennis: Here is your winner, a NEW GIW.COM CHAMPION....’THE CYCLONE’ JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!

Vinegar: Armageddon may be an overstatement, but this is a monumental shock, in possibly the quickest GIW.Com Title Matchup in history, ‘The Cyclone’ JK becomes Global Impact Wrestling’s youngest ever Champion.

Hanson: Good for him...

Vinegar: it is, everyone wrote him off, as they have been prone to do for his entire tenure in GIW, but finally all his hard work and determination has paid off, and he looks delighted. And from backstage come Jasmine who plants a kiss firmly on his lips, Paul Cockataoo and Ethan King swiftly follow, and they hoist JK onto their shoulders as he thrusts the title belt into the air...this is a special moment for JK, and no-one will be able to take it away from him.

Hanson: I think I might be welling up...

Vinegar: And you call Alex Kiseragi gay...anyway we’ll be right back after this....

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: Well, it looks like Salem has finally decided to grace us with his presence.

Hanson: How do you know that?

Vinegar: I know these things.

Hanson: I suspect we’re about to go backstage aren’t we?

Vinegar: Perceptive, aren’t we?

Backstage, Salem has just entered the arena, carrying his duffel bag in one hand, the other pressing his cell phone to his ear. His pace is slightly rushed, as it should be, as he is only just now arriving at the arena, moments before his match. Behind him, a random arena staff member looks up and, seeing him, rushes forward, hailing him. Salem pays no mind, but continues on with his conversation.

Salem: Look, Sherry, spare me the sarcasm and humor me. Any change?

Salem pauses listening to what is, apparently, Sherry’s sarcastic remark.

Salem: I know it hasn’t been long since I left, but you never know with these things of the mind. Things change with a quickness, shit happens. As for my match, why should I be worried? Granted, I haven’t done anything this week, but all this guy has done is Twitter meaningless nonsense.

About this time, the staff member reaches Salem and taps on his shoulder. Salem lets out an exhale of frustration and turns to him.

Salem: Hold on a sec, Sherry. Yeah?

Random staff member: Hi, Salem! How are you today?

Salem: Look, kid, I don’t have time for chit chat, I have more important things on my mind, okay.

With that, Salem turn, effectively dismissing the young man behind him. Not to be deterred, the staffer again taps on Salem’s shoulder. Salem spins around.

Salem: What?! I’m on the phone, man!

The man shrinks back a bit, but continues on.

Random staff member: Uh, sir, there’s some things that have been going on before you got here. See, there’s this woman and-

Before he can finish, Salem holds up a hand to interrupt him.

Salem: Look kid, I’m sure it’s important, but to be quite frank with you, it’s always a fucking woman. And to be honest, the only woman I give a damn about is in a hospital several miles from here so I really don’t see how what you have to say is of any relevance to me. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m returning to my phone call to find out what’s going on with said female. Thank you.

With that, Salem turns and stalks away from the man, moving swiftly in the direction of his dressing room.

Random staff member: Wait, sir, you don’t undestand!

Salem continues on, ignoring the young man and resuming his conversation.

Salem: Sorry about that, you were saying, Sherry?

Hanson: I think he may have wanted to listen to the Random Staff Member, but what do I know, i thought JK was certain to lose...so don’t listen to me.

Vinegar: No need to request that...the next match is probably an unofficial Tag team Championship Number 1 Contendership Match, with the newly formed team of ‘The Monster’ Dredd and ‘The Japanese Powerhouse’ Komosube, taking on the odd couple of the GIW Tag Team scene, Jet Somers and KvK.....

Hanson: it doesn’t matter who Blessed Immortality face, they’ll defeat whoever is put in front of them...

Vinegar: Getting ahead of yourself again...what happened last time you prematurely called the result of a match...

Hanson: But that was JK...it’s not my fault Nate lost his mind, there is no chance ‘Blessed Immortality’ will be defeated, the laws of probability are set against two unfathomable upsets in one year, let alone one night, those chances are astronomical.

Dennis: The Next Match is scheduled for one fall, and is a Tag Team Match Up.

The arena blacks out all lights except the ones over the entrance ramp, ring, and the first five rows or so. As Mark Collie begins his haunting ballad "In Time," the image of a dimly lit hallway which could be in any arena appears on the screen.

Dennis: Introducing first, from Deep Creek, Mississippi....JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMEEEEEEEEEEERS!!!!

A silhouette resembling Jet Somers appears in the distance of the hallway, walking toward the screen. As the first verse plays out, he marches resolutely to full size on the screen, and as the last line is spoken, 'In time, your time will be no more...,' the silhouette has filled the dark hall, and the vertical control suddenly flips out as Nonpoint's "Everybody Down" hits hard and Jet runs out from behind the curtain. He runs to the edge of the stage and pumps his fist in the air a few times. At 'And when I stomp you' Jet sprints down the ramp, slapping hands in the crowd as he goes, running to leap onto the apron of the ring. He grabs the rope with one hand and pumps the other fist in the air on each 'Everybody Down!' chant of the chorus. Jet finally steps in, bouncing on the balls of his feet and throwing shadow punches to warm up.

Vinegar: Jet has been really impressive of recent, but he does seem to have somewhat of a distain for the industry...

Hanson: If most of your exposure had involved Komosube, Brandon Brown and Alex Kiseragi you’d have a deep distain for the industry...

"All Nightmare Long"

Dennis: And his partner...from Orlando Florida....KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY VEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

Vinegar: Oh dear god...

Hanson: Well that’s clearly unoriginal...

Vinegar: He is drunk, isn’t he.

Hanson: As a skunk...

Vinegar: And Jet does not look happy as KvK stumbles through the ropes, nearly falling flat on his face, but gaining his balance and burping directly into his tag partners face.

Hanson: Somers shoves KvK into the corner and tell him to stay right there...and Jet climbs out of the ring...wait he’s coming over here...ha ha...

Vinegar: What?...Well I guess you can...Columbian Roast.....

Hanson: Ha Ha! No more coffee for you Nick.

Vinegar: I made that flask especially top keep me awake during your Blessed Immortality rants, I’m now feeling more worried about the rest of the show and my ability to survive it...

Hanson: Well it’s gone to a good cause...Somers is feeding it to KvK in an attempt to sober him up before the match, looks like he’s had a wild few days...

Vinegar: Well no one had seen him before the show, there were questions as to whether he’d show up, and I’d still argue that he hasn’t really...

“Generic Cross Japanese and American Rock Music.

Dennis: And Introducing their opponents.....DREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDD AND KOMOSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUBEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Vinegar: Jet needs KvK for this one there is no way he can handle both these monsters on his own...hang on a minute...

Hanson: Men In Black! Men In Black!

Vinegar: it’s immigration control...and they are cuffing Komo...and he’s not putting up much of a fight....looks like the big Japanese dude doesn’t have the right work visa...and they’re taking him away...

Hanson: OK...NOW this night can’t get any better....

Vinegar: And Dredd just stands on the ramp, in shock, looks down at Jet who now realises the number have been equalled...but ‘The Monster’ just shakes his head, seems like he’s uninterested with this endeavour without Komo, and he just walks backstage, much to Jet’s utter disgust...

Hanson: he’s outraged, he’s screaming at Peterson to go and get him, asking what kind of a company is this...and he’s got a point...who employs the likes of Komosube in the first place...

Vinegar: Obviously only the highly gullible...

Hanson: Well i take it we’re not getting a match then...

Vinegar: looks that way...

Hanson: What a show this is turning out to be, a whole 2 minutes of action in the ring so far...but we’ve still got...

Vinegar: Yes, yes, Blessed Immortality, we know...but first we’ve got Moss Edwards and Salem, who can hopefully restore some dignity to the night...

Hanson: Don’t count on it...

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Hanson: Doesn’t time fly.

Vinegar: When you’re having fun?

Hanson: I wouldn’t go that far.

Vinegar: How can you not be? We’ve already crowned a new GIW.com champion tonight as well as seeing a solid tag team match up just now.

Hanson: Solid? Yeah, right.

Vinegar: And now we’re going to have a chance to see the ever exciting Moss Edwards is singles action once again.

Hanson: Oooh, Grace.

Vinegar: Yes, that too.

The Newsie extra who by this point should probably have earned himself a name of his own and most likely has a cult following somewhere on the Internet makes his weekly appearance on the stage.

Extra: Action!

The crowd cheer for someone, though the line is certainly blurred between Moss, Grace and their herald. Dark of the Matinee starts to play and the stars walk out to the top of the ramp.

Dennis: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Grace Harding! From Hollywood, California! Weighing in at 180lbs! The Auteur, Moss Edwaaaaards!!!

Vinegar: Moss has been on a dominant roll since his defeat at Battleground.

Hanson: Yeah he’s beating everyone that doesn’t matter.

Vinegar: It’s all a case of showing you’re still a top contender and it’s only a matter of time until we see the Auteur challenging for the big one again.

Moss and Grace get down to the ring after a spell of Moss’s usual antics. Moss slides into the ring and passes his entrance clothes back out to Grace. Fall Back to Zero starts to play and some long winded stuff happens. Salem walks out.

Dennis: And the opponent! From Slaughter Swap, South Carolina!-

Hanson: Is that a real place?

Vinegar: No idea.

Dennis: Weighing in at 313lbs! The Horror Show, Saleeeeeeem!!!

Vinegar: 133lbs weight difference in this one. It’ll be interesting to see how Edwards tackles it.

Salem does some more long winded stuff and gets down to ring side when-

Vinegar: Suicide dive! That’s how the Auteur is going to tackle this one. Straight onto the offensive before even the opening bell.

Hanson: That’s called a pre-match attack.

Vinegar: I don’t think that counts. It’s not like he attacked him from behind with a chair. Moss catches Salem off guard and takes him off his feet at the get go. Drags him up to his feet and able to roll him under the rope.

Ding! Ding!

Vinegar: There’s the official opening bell and Moss has taken some commanding momentum early on. Edwards putting the boots down, trying to keep Salem grounded but it’s not going so well.

Hanson: It didn’t work for Chassie Fear and it’s not going to work for you.

Vinegar: Salem able to fight through and shove Moss off his feet. The Auteur quickly back up though as Salem reaches his feet. Basement dropkick from Edwards, knocks Salem back onto his front. Moss off the ropes, running low dropkick to the face. Here’s a cover.

1!

Vinegar: Kick out by Salem. Moss off the ropes again. Springboard moonsa- No! Salem rolls under it. Moss lands on his feet though. Salem back up- And knocked down with a big flying forearm.

Hanson: And Grace seemed to enjoy that. I wonder if she’d enjoy it more from my lap.

Vinegar: Probably not. Salem is back up but once more brought down with a chop block this time. The Auteur clearly out here with a game plan and he’s sticking to it.

Hanson: I just thought! Horizons. What better match then Grace Harding vs. Jezebel Saint? In like, a Bra and Panties match!

Vinegar: There has never been a bra and panties match in GIW and the biggest event of the year doesn’t seem like a good time to start.

Hanson: Homo.

Vinegar: Moss going back to those legs. Looks like he’s going for a single leg crab but Salem’s fighting it off. Kicks Moss away. Auteur off the ropes though.

Hanson: Shiniiiiiing W-

Vinegar: Shut up, Moss missed. Salem able to get his head down and Edwards passes by. Salem is up and behind him- Overhead German Suplex! Edwards dumped squarely on the back of his head.

Hanson: That’s what you get for trying to grow hair!

Vinegar: Certainly one of the stranger things you’ve said.

Hanson: Really? Me?

Vinegar: Ok, maybe not you but for anyone else it would be. Salem looking to follow up, dragging Moss to his feet and- Moss counters! Pulls Salem down to the ropes. Moss runs up the turnbuckle- Thumbs Down!

Hanson: This could be over soon!

Vinegar: That wasn’t genuine excitement was it?

Hanson: Yes! Because-

Vinegar: Blessed Immortality are next, yes, yes, change the channel. Moss back up on the apron. Salem back up. Springboard wheel kick! Huge shot takes Salem down again. Lateral press.

1!

2!

Vinegar: No, another kick out by Salem. Moss seems a little frustrated, he looks like he wants to end this. He’s pulled Salem back up. Could be the Box Office Poison.

Hanson: Have you forgotten the 133lbs weight difference.

Vinegar: Moss Edwards may have done but he’s been firmly reminded. He’s doesn’t have a chance of getting Salem off the ground and The Horror Show hits back with a side slam. Salem with the cover this time.

1!

2!

Vinegar: The Auteur with the kick out this time. Salem finally able to take some control in this one though. He’s dragged Moss up and into the corner. Big hip shot, followed up by a big back elbow and just tossed into the middle of the ring.

Hanson: Aw Grace looks upset. Come here, have a cuddle.

Vinegar: She looks fine to me. Moss is a tough guy like all the athletes here. Salem grabs him again and plants him with a body slam and a standing knee drop, right onto the forehead.

Hanson: If Moss got so beaten up he couldn’t fight for several weeks, do you think Grace would come around anyway?

Vinegar: Probably not.

Hanson: Get up Moss!

Vinegar: Salem’s got him back up again. Short arm clothesline- ducked! Moss gets under it and- Twist Ending! That cutter could have just turned things right back around.

Hanson: He still has to put him away though and the Box Office Poison isn’t an option.

Vinegar: They don’t call him the Tastemaker for nothing. He’s headed up top! Shooting Star-

Hanson: Elbow drop?

Vinegar: I guess that’s the best way to describe it. Shooting Star Elbow...

Hanson: BUT SALEM MOVES!

Vinegar: Moss laid out on the floor now, and Salem gingerly gets to his feet, can he take advantage of this opportunity...

Hanson: Uh oh, that looks like trouble! And trouble is hot!

Vinegar: Lilith is coming out from backstage and she's making her way down the ramp! I don't think Salem's noticed her yet.

Hanson: How can he not notice that gorgeous woman coming this way and what is her connection with him? He can't have her too!

Vinegar: I have no idea, but I think he just noticed her. He looks like he's seen a ghost!

Hanson: She's smiling at him, waving, and blowing him kisses! Do you think she'll ever do that for me?

Vinegar: Not likely. Salem is still staring at Lilith in shock, he better get his head back in the ga- IT'S RAENIUS! RAENIUS FROM OUT OF NOWHERE INTO THE RING BEHIND SALEM!

Hanson: Look out Salem!

Vinegar: RAENIUS WITH A RIPPERSNAPPER! HE HIT SALEM WITH THE RIPPERSNAPPER AND NOW SALEM IS LAID OUT!

Hanson: And there goes Lilith back up the ramp. I hate to see her go, but watching her leave is sure fun.

Vinegar: Would you pay attention?! Raenius standing over Salem momentarily before he vaults out of the ring. Moss is now slowly pulling himself over to Salem's laid-out body.

Hanson: Oh how the tides have turned!

Vinegar: The match is still continuing! Is Burke blind that he didn't see what Raenius just did?!

Hanson: No, he was distracted but Lilith too, but what a distraction!

Vinegar: Moss makes the cover!

1!

2!

3!

Ding! Ding! Ding!

Dennis: Here is your winner.... Moss Edwards!

Vinegar: Salem is not going to be happy by this turn of events.

Hanson: Hopefully we'll learn more about the mysterious Lilith soon.

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Backstage in Raenius’ dressing room, Lilith awaits her new accomplice. Her lithe figure lounges gracefully in the chair where Raenius previously sat, the look on her face introspective as she calculates her next move. Raising the wine glass held daintily in her right hand to her lips, she looks over the rim to Syn, amused at the glare she receives in return. The woman sits across the room from her in stony silence. Lilith chuckles to herself silently and sips her wine. The door to the dressing room crashing open startles Syn, but Lilith holds her poise and her calm demeanor, expecting what’s coming. The Devil’s Advocate stands framed in the doorway, his anger radiating off of him in waves and filling the air with a sharp, almost metallic scent. The tension is palpable, and behind him Lilith notices another woman, Nyx. With a small sigh, she turns her attention back to the very angry man currently raging at her.

Raenius: It always comes back to uCw, doesn’t it? Everything I do, everything I’ve done and anything I ever will do will always swing back around to uCw. So are you happy now, you manipulative fucking cum bucket?

Lilith: Happier, perhaps. But not completely happy…

Raenius: I just planted my brother on his asshole for you. I didn’t like it. And you’re not even close to finishing with this, are you?

Lilith: Finishing? No, no. We’ve got a long road ahead of us, Raenius. This has only just begun.

Raenius: Hell hath no fury like an uppity skank, hmm?

Her eyebrow rises.

Lilith: You know, you can make this difficult and constantly insult me or you can quit your childish diatribe and help me without all this fuss. Really, Raenius, it’s unnecessary when the fact of the matter is this is all very simple. You owe me, so you’ll help me.

Raenius: And how often do you expect to be able to ask me to repay a debt that old? What happens when I think that I’ve paid back enough?

Lilith’s lips form a half-smile, as if she were waiting for such a response from him. Her words come out in a sort of purr.

Lilith: Can you really put a price on what I did for Kathryn and, indirectly, for you? Can you put a time limit on it? Why don’t you ask Kathryn what she thinks, Raenius? Or is it you already know what she would say and you’re just having a temper tantrum?

Raenius eyes slide closed and his hands clench into fists of impotent rage.

Raenius: You know the answer to that already, but don’t act like you did this out of the goodness of your heart, as if you have one. You planned for something like this to happen. You only did it because you knew having me owe you something would be useful to you. But nothing says I have to be cordial about it.

Lilith’s face forms into a hurt pout, but anyone can see it is put on.

Lilith: You wound me with your words, but someday you’ll see that I do this not only for me, but for you, and for Salem as well. One day, you will both thank me instead of maligning me so horribly in your minds and with your words. But until that day, don’t you think it would be so much easier for us, since we’ll be working so closely together, to call a truce, be it an uneasy one?

As she finishes her plea for truce, Lilith glances up at Raenius from beneath her long, dark, thick lashes. Raenius pauses, looking at her long and hard before responding.

Raenius: We’ll see.

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: Do you have problems speaking on TV?

Hanson: No, just speaking with you.

Vinegar: Harsh, and entirely unnecessary.

Hanson: That’s what yo momma said.

Vinegar: About what?

Hanson: You don’t want to know.

Vinegar: Classy. You getting excited now then?

Hanson: Oh yeah. The only thing that can make this better would be for my Gabby to show up as a valet.

Vinegar: Well I hope your commentary won’t be as one dimensional as it usually is under these circumstances.

Hanson: I can pretty much guarantee it will be.

Vinegar: Oh yippee.

Hanson: Good, everyone’s out of the way.

Vinegar: Yeah, it was very rude of them to take a whole two minutes to drag themselves away.

Hanson: It was wasn’t it. Some people have no respect. I mean-

Vinegar: I was being sarcastic.

Hanson: …I knew that.

Vinegar: No I was serious.

Hanson: Ha, I knew you were-

Vinegar: Being sarcastic.

Hanson: Being sarcastic still.

Vinegar: Uh-huh.

Hanson: Is this match ready to get started yet?

Vinegar: I should think it’s about there.

Hanson: About time.

Dennis: The following contest is your Sentinel Main Event and is for the GIW Tag Team Championship!

Kickstart My Heart starts to play and Brandon Brown walks out to the top of the ramp to his usual riotous ovation. He has the title belt slung over his shoulder and holds it up as he makes his way towards the ring.

Dennis: Introducing first the Champions! From Albion, Indiana! Weighing in at 190lbs! Brandooooon Brooooown!!!

Brandon holds the belt up with one hand and uses his free one to high five fans at the base of the ramp. His music fades out and seamlessly into Teahouse which draws a renewed vigour to the crowd. Alex Kiseragi walks out, his title belt strapped around his waist. Katie Piper steps out behind him.

Dennis: And his tag team partner! Accompanied to the ring by Katie Piper! From San Francisco, California! Weighing in at 198lbs! The Dragon, Alex Kiseragiiiiiii!!!

Alex does his kicks and back flip combo that sparks pyros along the length of the stage. He makes his way down the ramp, Katie close behind. When he reaches Brandon, Alex jumps through the bottom and middle rope as Brandon slides into the ring.

Dennis: They are your GIW Tag Team Champioooooooons!!!

They climb up opposite turnbuckles and pose with the belts until Alex back flips off and Brandon steps down. Each of them give their belts to Owen Peterson and Alex passes his Gi out to Katie as they await their opponents.

Vinegar: The team of Alex Kiseragi and Brandon Brown are certainly favourites with the fans.

Hanson: The fans are idiots.

Hanson is pelted by an empty paper cup in the back of the head.

Hanson: Hey!

Vinegar: You asked for that. This match-up tonight is sure to be the most challenging of their young reign though.

Hanson: It’s going to be an essential part of it. The end.

Vinegar: I wouldn’t be so hasty. These two have bonded as a strong team over recent months. You can’t count the GIW Tag Team Champions out against anyone.

Immortal starts to play and the crowds ovation turns to jeers and boos. Donovan Hastings walks out to the top of the ramp, Calypso Desmona right alongside. He poses and she removes his robe.

Dennis: And introducing the challengers! First, accompanied to the ring by Calypso Desmona! From Hartford, Connecticut! Weighing in at 230lbs! The Lord of Pain, Donovaaaaan Hastiiiiiiings!!!

Hastings and Desmona make their way down to the ring but stop at the foot of the ramp. Calypso starts to circle the ring, encroaching on Katie but Alex drops out to stand in the way and she backs off. Immortal cuts out abruptly to be replaced by Bummer. Travis Roberts makes his way to the stage.

Dennis: And his tag team partner! From Phoenix, Arizona! Weighing in at 220lbs! He is your GIW Unified Global Champion! The Blessed One, Travis Robeeeeeerts!!!

Travis makes his way down to the ring. Just before he gets there Donovan climbs up the ring steps, forcing Travis to wait to climb into the ring. The pair of them both eventually get in and the four men face off in the centre of the ring.

Vinegar: This promises to be an explosive match up. The x-factor of the questionable Owen Peterson in charge though is something the champions will have to be wary off.

Hanson: You couldn’t possibly suggest a stand up family man like Peterson is crooked.

Vinegar: I’m not suggesting it. I’m stating it as fact and after his recent displays he has no grounds to say otherwise.

Hanson: Oh yeah, on the subject of liable suits. I haven’t heard anything about my comments last week. Guess I must have been correct about the Rainbow Serpent.

Vinegar: All it shows is that he’s much more forgiving then many people around here. I wouldn’t count yourself as safe just yet though.

Hanson: Bah, me? I’m bullet proof.

Vinegar: We’ll see about that. Looks like this ones ready to get underway though. Looks like we’re getting Donovan Hastings and Brandon Brown to start this one off.

Ding! Ding!

Vinegar: There’s the bell. These two circling each other. No-one in this match is a mystery to any other. There’s the lock up. Hastings wins out and puts in the side headlock. Brandon shoves him off to the ropes but Hastings comes back with a shoulder block.

Hanson: That’s classic Lord Chief right there. Nothing you can do about it, no matter how much tape you watch.

Vinegar: Hastings off the ropes now. Brandon throws at his feet, Hastings steps over and get dropped with a back elbow. Brandon with a quick cover.

…

Vinegar: No count at all. It looked like at least a one but Peterson didn’t eve budge.

Hanson: Bah, he didn’t have time to, the Lord Chief kicked out so fast.

Vinegar: Both men up and locked up in the middle of the ring for a second time. Hastings with a back double leg takedown and floats over into a ground headlock. Brandon counters out into a hammerlock. Both men standing. Hastings with a fireman’s carry takeover.

Hanson: More classic technical wrestling. I don’t get how you can doubt there will be new Tag Team champions with this kind of display.

Vinegar: Because there’s a lot more to this then a single man. Hastings puts in a rear chin lock. The Most Resilient Man in GIW fights back though. Pushes himself back up. Elbow strikes to the body and Hastings has to let go. Brandon running off the ropes, ducks a clothesline from Hastings.

Hanson: Yeah, you can keep running but you can’t hide.

Vinegar: Tag! Alex makes a blind tag as Brandon rebounds again. Brandon slides under Hastings legs. Kiseragi springboards- dropkick as Brown sweeps the legs. Beautiful double team move. Peterson quick to force Brandon Brown back out to the apron.

Hanson: So he should be. That was an illegal double team.

Vinegar: There was nothing illegal about it. It was simply a display of great tag team wrestling. Kiseragi looking to follow up.

Hanson: No, Hastings has stopped him with a mere wave of the hand. Kiseragi is so stupid.

Vinegar: Hastings back to his feet and- looks like he’s proposing a test of strength.

Hanson: No way Dragon Boy can win that.

Vinegar: Seems he’s willing to give it a try. These men locking hands.

Hanson: And the Lord Chief driving him down into the mat. Couldn’t end any other way.

Vinegar: I wouldn’t count him out. Alex with a monkey flip, tosses him overhead. Back roll and Kiseragi is in an MMA style mount.

Hanson: The Headliner in to stop him from opening up with those closed fists. You know he was going to.

Vinegar: Travis with a boot to the back of the Dragon’s head. Blessed Immortality now going to work with the double team despite the lack of a tag. Brandon Brown into the ring and Peterson gets right in his way.

Hanson: He’s keeping the order Nick, that’s his job.

Vinegar: And it’s letting Hastings and Roberts stomp Kiseragi down.

Hanson: That’s Brandon’s fault.

Vinegar: Well Travis is back out on the apron but by his own choice then any kind of intervention. Hastings in full control after that though. He’s got Alex up and into the corner and punishing him with those body shots. Whip across the ring, Hastings charging in- No, Alex gets a boot up. Hurricanrana! Big takeover and he makes the tag.

Hanson: No he doesn’t.

Vinegar: What? I just saw it.

Hanson: Well Peterson didn’t so it didn’t happen. Brandon is forced back where he belongs and Hastings drags the Mighty Rainbow over to his corner. There’s a proper tag and here comes the Headliner.

Vinegar: Roberts drags Alex up and plants him with a scoop slam. Followed up with an elbow across the chest. Pin attempt.

1!
2!

Vinegar: Kick out despite that hideous fast count. Travis drags him up to his feet once again. DDT! Dropped him right on his head.

Hanson: And the Blessed One has time to have a few words with that honey in the front row.

Vinegar: Oh of all the arrogant- I hope that bites him on the ass.

Hanson: Won’t happen.

Vinegar: Seems he’s ready to actually compete again. Small package! Kiseragi rolls him up.

…

1!

…

Hanson: Kick out at one!

Vinegar: After another ridiculous slow count. This match is a farce.

Hanson: You mind what you say about a Blessed Immortality match. This has match of the year candidate written all over it.

Vinegar: Both men up and Kiseragi just runs straight into a big boot from the Headliner.

Hanson: Travis is having to take a minute to recompose himself. He’s laughing too hard at how stupid Kiseragi is.

Vinegar: And again giving the Dragon time to recover. Travis back in finally. Michinoku Driver! No! Alex scrambles free and lands behind him. Enziguri! Alex just flattened the Headliner with shot and both men are down.

Hanson: It’s time. I knew we’d see it this match. The AHTTRLAOCIAFSOS.

Vinegar: Huh?

Hanson: The Anti Hot Tag Travis Roberts Lures An Overgrown Chump Into a False Sense of Security. It’s when Travis feints going for a tag then when the opponent comes in all fired up he knocks them inside out.

Vinegar: Sounds like more of your classic denial. Both men heading for their corners. Tag by Alex!

Hanson: Tag by Travis?

Vinegar: So much for that idea. Brandon and Hastings in. Brandon Brown ducks a lariat and hit’s a baseball slide to Travis as he tries to get back up. Quickly back up.

Hanson: Dragon Boy has grabbed the Lord Chief.

Vinegar: Peterson tries to break that full nelson but Alex shoves him down with his leg.

Hanson: Disqualify him!

Vinegar: I think he would if he weren’t here to make sure we had new champions. Brandon with a running calf kick. Dragon Suplex! Brandon with the pin!

…

…

Hanson: He’s got to get Kiseragi out of the ring.

Vinegar: Kiseragi is out of the ring. Peterson’s just berating him anyway. Oh he finally sees the pin.

…

1!

…

Hanson: Kick out at one. That big double team barely phased him.

Vinegar: That was about a six count. This match could have been won right there. Uh-oh, here comes trouble.

Hanson: Raenius? Again? For someone not on the card we’re seeing far too much of this guy.
Vinegar: And he’s not alone. Glenn Burke is just a few steps behind him. Brandon dragging Hastings to his feet again. Low blow! Hastings hit’s a low blow and no surprise, Peterson does nothing. Hastings goes for a pin.

1!
2!

Hanson: Raenius dragged him out of the ring! What travesty is this?

Vinegar: Seems like justice to me. Raenius drags Peterson out and throws him into the crowd barriers. Burke’s in the ring. Looks like we have a change of official.

Hanson: You can’t change officials mid match!

Vinegar: Well they have and about time. We may get a fair match now. Hastings looks pretty put out by it all though and he leaves himself open for a jaw breaker from Brown. He makes the tag!

Hanson: This isn’t right! This isn’t how it goes!

Vinegar: Kiseragi into the ring and-

Hanson: The Lord Chief just throws him out the other side!

Vinegar: No, Alex catches himself and lands on the apron. I don’t think Hastings realises though. Alex blocks a punch from Travis. Jumping roundhouse kick knocks the Headliner down to the mat.

Hanson: The Immortal is about to end Brandon Brown and have done with it. He’s signalling for Destiny’s Call.

Vinegar: No, Brandon blocks it and gets his feet back down. Brandon off the ropes, ducks a clothesline. Yari Kick!!! Hastings just turned around straight into a Yari Kick from the Dragon. Vaulting Body Press! Brandon just launches himself over the ropes and takes out the Blessed One on the outside. Kiseragi with the pin!

1!

2!

3!

Ding! Ding!

Dennis: Here are your winners and stiiiiiiiiiiiill, GIW Tag Team Champions, Brandon Brown and Alex Kiseragiiiiii!!!

Vinegar: What a match. You’re right Dan, that was great.

Hanson: *grumbles*

Vinegar: Don’t be a sore loser Dan. The Tag Team Champions were just the better TEAM on the night and that’s what this division is about.

Hanson: *grumble grumble*

Vinegar: Fine. That match brings another great edition of Sentinel to a close. Join us again next week as we count down to Distant Whispers!

Calypso helps Hastings out of the ring. They try to get to Peterson but Raenius blocks their path and they think better of it. Travis escapes from Brandon’s onslaught and makes his way up the ramp. Brown slides back into the ring as Katie retrieves the title belts and climbs in herself. She hands them to the champs then raises their hands. The camera fades on the shot of the three of them, hands and belts held high in the middle of the ring.

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Credits

GIW.com Title MAtch
T-Rob

Tag Team Non Starter
T-Rob

Moss vs Salem
A-Kis

The Raenius/Lilith/Salem Arc
Jez and R!

Main Event
A-Kis

Editor
T-Rob

[>V<]

Me first for once!

Sorry I was such a slacker this week.

[brandonbrown]

Damn good thing we got that loser ref out of the ring. I'm pretty sure he was trying to screw us out of the match.

[Jet Somers]

i hate no shows

[Eden Morgan]

Next week will be better, right guys?

Right. I answered for you. Now do it.

[Alex Kiseragi]

I think you're right Brandon, of all the nerve huh?

Not much I can really critique, the first matches were, adequate, under the circumstances. Congratz to JK on taking the .Com belt.

Thanks to R! and Jez for putting the segments together, they tied the show together and turned it into something worthwhile.

[Moss Works Jericho's Schedule]

Hey, it's still better than Raw was last week.

['The Monster' Dredd]

My bad guys. Work did its usual thing and spat at me. I now have months of compliance auditing in front of me.
Ill be around but who knows if I can RP.

[>V<]

Three hours of static is better than Raw.

[Declan Prescott]

If Andy and I return to form a highly competitive stable with DJ, can he be allowed to come back?