Post by EZRA on Feb 10, 2024 8:58:51 GMT -5
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“You’re not going to kick his ass over this?!”
That angry voice belongs to Nora, the girlfriend of Ezra. She sits on their bed back in California with her legs crossed. A laptop sits on a bedtable a few feet in front of her with Ezra visible in a video chat.
“All that stuff that Knox guy was saying is bullshit, Ez. And you’re not going to do anything about it?”
“He’s just trying to get a reaction from the both of us, love. And it clearly fuckin’ worked.”
“He said that I cheated on you. And alluded to me handing out blowjobs like candy.”
“And I don’t believe any of it, Nora. He’s a fuckin’ idiot. Yeah, he won our match and that sucks. But I’m not about to start some blood feud over some words he said.”
Nora crosses her arms and raises her eyebrows slightly.
“Zeke told you that Zane Scott tried to cripple you and you nearly crippled his friend over those words. So that’s also bullshit, Ezra.”
We can see Ezra sigh on the video.
“And I regret how ALL of that went down. It sucked…”
His voice trails off and Nora’s expression changes.
“I understand. I guess I just got a bit worked up after hearing what Knox said. None of your opponents have tried to drag my name into their bullshit, ya know?”
“Because most of my opponents don’t suffer from diarrhea of the mouth,” he says with a smile.
Nora returns the smile, and her posture relaxes a bit.
“What did the doc say about coming back here after Infinity?”
“He was optimistic about it. Says that I’ve made a bunch of progress and he’s open to the idea of you coming here more so than me going back there at the moment.”
“Well, it’s not a ‘no’. I’ll take it.”
“I’ll get a for sure answer after Synergy this week and get a plane ticket purchased either way. I’m pretty optimistic about it as well. I can’t wait to see you, love.”
“The feeling is mutual.”
“Hey, babe. I gotta go. Time to go meet with the doctor. We can chat later after my workout. Sound good?”
“Most definitely. I love you, Ez.”
“I love you too.”
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The scene opens with a very obvious greenscreen background with the words ‘2024 Nominees’ above a picture of Charles Darwin wearing some neon sunglasses. Ezra Wolf walks into the frame wearing a tuxedo t-shirt and similarly colored glasses and holding a clipboard. He sets down the clipboard on a makeshift podium and ‘straightens’ his tie before looking up at the camera.
“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the unofficially official 2024 Darwin Award Nomination Ceremony. In the long and esteemed history of the Darwin Awards, there have been many history-making nominees AND winners. Ranging from a 39-year-old dude who fell 24 stories while trying to prove the durability of a window by ramming into it, knocking it from its frame. To a 27-year-old religious fella that died after he tried to convert an indigenous uncontacted tribe. One of my favorites is a dude that decided to go kite surfing in hurricane-force winds. His body was found a kilometer away from the sea after he made impact with several buildings.”
Ezra pauses and looks at his clipboard briefly before returning his attention to the camera.
“To qualify, the recipient of the award must fall into at least one of a few different categories. They have to be dead or rendered sterile. Not sure if the nominee has children but he’s definitely not dead. More on that later. They have to exhibit astoundingly stupid judgement, caused their own demise, and be capable of sound judgement. That last one might disqualify this nominee and I’ll also explain that in more detail later as well. Lastly, the event must be verified, and it must not have injured any innocent bystanders.”
“The reason why this is an unofficially official nomination is because the person I’m nominating is still alive and kicking. That’s a great Nonpoint song by the way. My nominee is Mr. Konrad Raab. A former Cross-Hemisphere Champion and perennial challenger for the Chaos Championship. This guy is damn near 60 and is bound and determined to continue fighting in matches without any rules or safeguards in place. I could fill a full notebook with the amount of Chaos matches this dude has been in. Unfortunately, I could count on one hand, maybe, how many Chaos matches he’s actually won.”
He pauses again and flips through a couple pages.
“Ah Ha!” he says before continuing. “On top of refusing to take a safer route in his old age, this crazy bastard is also an avid race car driver. And not the little go-karts at your local family friendly establishment, my dude. The big monster ones that way over 3,000lbs. Bro. I get being a thrill-seeker. Most people do a lot of that in their 20s and 30s when their bodies can handle it better. OR as some sort of mid-life crisis. Mr. Konrad Raab is none of those things. Which is exactly why he deserves to be nominated.”
“Mr. Konrad Raab has repeatedly entered these lawless contests without considering the fact that he is OLD. AS. FUCK. Like I said on Synergy, I’m trying to save him from himself because he has failed to show he is smart enough to quit while he’s way behind, which goes to show he may not be capable of sound judgement. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over while expecting a different result. Eventually, Mr. Konrad Raab is going to step into that ring for a Chaos Rules Match and not be able to walk back up the ramp when it’s over.”
Ezra tosses the clipboard to the side and places both hands on the top of the podium while staring at the camera.
“Konrad… is dying in the ring really what you want? Unlike Ezekiel, I’m not trying to murder somebody just to get ahead of the competition. BUT… in the words of Ivan Drago… if he dies, he dies.”
He quickly walks out of frame as the camera zooms in towards the clipboard. Once it’s close enough, you can see that the pages Ezra was flipping through were blank.
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Instead of sitting inside the doctor’s home office, we join both the doctor and Ezra inside the greenhouse. Ezra had found two camping chairs in a shed next to the doc’s house and moved them into the greenhouse so the two men could meet in a more relaxed fashion.
“I hate to sound like an eavesdropper, although you did have your door open. I heard Nora sounding very upset earlier today. How’s everything going with you two?”
Ezra kicks his feet up onto the edge of a planter and leans back in his chair slightly.
“We’re okay, doc. Knox running his mouth about her just caught her off guard. That’s all. The goofy prick was just trying to mess with my focus.”
“Is that why you lost?”
“Sheesh. Straight to the point, my dude. But no. That’s not why I lost. Sticks and stones and all that. I lost because that’s how the cookie crumbled that not. Knox has been on a tear as of late which is why he’s leading Block A in points at the moment. It’s all good though.”
“Is it bothering you that you lost?”
Ezra takes his feet off the planter and sits up in his seat.
“To be honest? Yeah. A little bit. I was hoping that Zaniac would pull out the victory over Knox last week and that would be somewhat cathartic. Living through Zane vicariously or something like that. Unfortunately, it didn’t happen and now there’s little chance of me getting more points than him.”
The doctor had been taking notes in his book while they were talking but now, he’d set the book down in his lap and looked at Ezra.
“You said before that Knox called you ‘indifferent’. Do you agree with him?”
“I just don’t see the point in engaging somebody like that. There’s no sport in it with him. He just enjoys talking out of his ass all the fuckin’ time. The fact that he tends to win just makes it worse. Like I told him though, you win some and you lose some. I set a goal for the Global Challenge and so far, I’ve accomplished that goal. If I choose to partake in the Challenge next year, I’ll set a higher goal.”
“What was your goal for this year? Shouldn’t your goal be to win the event?”
Ezra shakes his ‘no’ slightly.
“That was my goal last year. And I failed. SPECTACULARLY. This year, I just wanted to earn more points than last year. And I succeeded. I finished with 3 points last year. And going into the final match of the GC, I have 4 points. Even if I somehow manage to lose next week, I still achieved my goal. And before you mention something about the bare minimum, I just want to say that my brain was a scrambled mess going into this and I didn’t want to set the bar too high.”
“That makes a bit of sense, Ezra. And your brain is less of a mess now? Did you check a few things off the list like I asked you to this week?”
“It’s definitely less of a mess, doc. And I managed to complete two of the tasks. Although, a doctor’s appointment seems like an odd task for you to give.”
“You’d been avoiding getting your knee looked at or even talking about it.”
“Yeah. True.”
“What did they have to say about it?”
Ezra sighs and rubs his knee. The human body is weird because it can sometimes sense it’s being talked about and then an itch that previously didn’t bug you has now become a menace. Or an old pain returns to reminds you it’s still there.
“They told me that at some point last year, I partially tore my ACL and meniscus. Not sure when though. It started to heal itself because the body does that. BUT to fully heal, I’ll need surgery. They gave me some physical therapy type exercises to do and told me not to put the surgery off for too long.”
“Why not schedule it now and get it over with?”
“Because the UGWC season just started, doc. Plus, people can fully tear their ACLs and not get surgery and still live a physical life. I don’t even know if I want to go under the knife.”
The doctor began writing again while Ezra continued to talk.
“Plus, I’ve been able to perform well enough with the damaged wheel. They gave me a heavy-duty knee brace to use if I wanted to. I don’t think it’s at that point yet. Yeah, there’s some level of pain involved. I can manage it without having to take a shitload of opiates or something more nefarious. It’s all good.”
“For now,” the doctor says without looking up from his note taking.
“For now. Yeah.”
The doctor finishes his note and looks back up at Ezra.
“What else did you cross of the list this week?”
“I went back to the shop I stole that hat and gloves from. I offered to donate some cash to them since I wasn’t able to return the items. They thanked me for my honesty and opted to not press charges or anything like that. I guess they actually donate winter stuff to less fortunate folks all the time. Which just makes me feel worse about it.”
“In a roundabout way, it’s good that you feel worse about it. Showing remorse for inappropriate actions is a sign of a healthy mind. If you didn’t have remorse over committing a crime, I’d say you need more help than I can give.”
“It felt good to talk to those folks though. Instead of taking a donation, they suggested I come back and volunteer some time at their shop. Put some miles on my soul I guess.”
“Are you?”
“For sure. After Infinity. When we do big events like that, we take a break after. And if Nora can come to visit, we could go together. She loves doing stuff like that.”
“I’d like to ask you a question about…” the doctor pauses slightly to go through his notes, “…the Conquest Championship.”
“Uh… yeah. Sure. What about it?”
“You had mentioned before that the competitors you faced to keep it was quite impressive. Do you think the pressure you put yourself to defend that belt lead to your psychotic episode?”
Ezra’s eyes widen. This is something he’d never thought about. He contributed the mental breakdown to stopping his meds as well as indirect trauma from the damage he’d suffered years prior that lead to him being in a coma.
“I… I don’t know. I-I-I..” he stammers a bit before catching himself. “I never considered that, doc. Maybe it was a factor. That run was my most success since arriving in UGWC. I enjoyed defending that title and etching my name in history. Does this mean being successful lead to me going fuckin’ crazy?”
“Not at all, Ezra. But pressure and stress can be damaging to a fragile mind. And with everything you’ve relayed to me since you’ve been in my care would suggest that your mind is fragile. If you find yourself in a situation like this again, you should be careful and focus on the coping skills we’ve gone over these last few weeks. I don’t want to discourage you from winning matches or trying to gain success here. I just want you to be safe and not go backwards into bad habits. You don’t plan on living here forever so it’s important that you take the opportunity to use what you’ve learned here once you leave.”
“Damn straight I’m not living here forever. No offense, doc. I just miss California.”
“None taken, Ezra. Again, I commend you for choosing to stay and allowing me to help you. You’re a remarkable young man and I believe that you’ll bring good things into this world. For now, I must end this session. I have…”
“A date?!” Ezra says excitedly.
“That’s none of your business, Ezra. And I’d appreciate you staying out my personal affairs,” the doctor says somewhat playfully. He then heads for the exit to the greenhouse.
“Did he just quote Ace Ventura?”
Ezra gets to his feet and collapses the two camping chairs. He sets them next to the door and takes a seat in the spot we’ve seen him in over the past couple of weeks.
“A year or so ago, my outlook on this match and Konrad himself would have been drastically different. Maybe even a few months ago it would’ve been different, bro. I don’t have any sort of respect for the geezer but as of late we do have common ground, Konrad. Even if you don’t want the world to know, people like us have a spotlight on them at all times. Entertainment professionals. Whether it be a camera crew around the arena or Phrixus hiding in the bushes. Which means the world knows we’re both in therapy. Instead of poking fun at you over it or finding something to use against you, I’m going to go a different route. And commend you for it, my dude. Motherfuckers like to act like it’s not manly to seek help from outside sources. And those dudes can kick rocks.”
“Alright. Enough with the niceties. We both don’t like each other at all, and it’s been like that since our very first encounter here. With the rules for the Global Challenge in place, I only got you for ten minutes. Which means that this isn’t going to be your most grueling Chaos Rules match ever. But I promise you that it’s going to be memorable. I’m not going to use any of the typical adages about horses and guns. I’m just going to promise you that this match is going to stand out in your memory. Down the road when you’re on your deathbed, you’re going to remember February 9th when Ezra Wolf ONCE AGAIN beat you at your own game. Bring your giant mace. Bring fire. Bring everything you got. Because I’ll be bringing something you don’t have, Konrad.”
Ezra pulls out a partially smoked joint and lights it up. He takes a few drags to get it fully lit before exhaling a large cloud of smoke.
“HEART.”
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“Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.” – William Congreve
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“You’re not going to kick his ass over this?!”
That angry voice belongs to Nora, the girlfriend of Ezra. She sits on their bed back in California with her legs crossed. A laptop sits on a bedtable a few feet in front of her with Ezra visible in a video chat.
“All that stuff that Knox guy was saying is bullshit, Ez. And you’re not going to do anything about it?”
“He’s just trying to get a reaction from the both of us, love. And it clearly fuckin’ worked.”
“He said that I cheated on you. And alluded to me handing out blowjobs like candy.”
“And I don’t believe any of it, Nora. He’s a fuckin’ idiot. Yeah, he won our match and that sucks. But I’m not about to start some blood feud over some words he said.”
Nora crosses her arms and raises her eyebrows slightly.
“Zeke told you that Zane Scott tried to cripple you and you nearly crippled his friend over those words. So that’s also bullshit, Ezra.”
We can see Ezra sigh on the video.
“And I regret how ALL of that went down. It sucked…”
His voice trails off and Nora’s expression changes.
“I understand. I guess I just got a bit worked up after hearing what Knox said. None of your opponents have tried to drag my name into their bullshit, ya know?”
“Because most of my opponents don’t suffer from diarrhea of the mouth,” he says with a smile.
Nora returns the smile, and her posture relaxes a bit.
“What did the doc say about coming back here after Infinity?”
“He was optimistic about it. Says that I’ve made a bunch of progress and he’s open to the idea of you coming here more so than me going back there at the moment.”
“Well, it’s not a ‘no’. I’ll take it.”
“I’ll get a for sure answer after Synergy this week and get a plane ticket purchased either way. I’m pretty optimistic about it as well. I can’t wait to see you, love.”
“The feeling is mutual.”
“Hey, babe. I gotta go. Time to go meet with the doctor. We can chat later after my workout. Sound good?”
“Most definitely. I love you, Ez.”
“I love you too.”
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“It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is most adaptable to change.” – Charles Darwin
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The scene opens with a very obvious greenscreen background with the words ‘2024 Nominees’ above a picture of Charles Darwin wearing some neon sunglasses. Ezra Wolf walks into the frame wearing a tuxedo t-shirt and similarly colored glasses and holding a clipboard. He sets down the clipboard on a makeshift podium and ‘straightens’ his tie before looking up at the camera.
“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the unofficially official 2024 Darwin Award Nomination Ceremony. In the long and esteemed history of the Darwin Awards, there have been many history-making nominees AND winners. Ranging from a 39-year-old dude who fell 24 stories while trying to prove the durability of a window by ramming into it, knocking it from its frame. To a 27-year-old religious fella that died after he tried to convert an indigenous uncontacted tribe. One of my favorites is a dude that decided to go kite surfing in hurricane-force winds. His body was found a kilometer away from the sea after he made impact with several buildings.”
Ezra pauses and looks at his clipboard briefly before returning his attention to the camera.
“To qualify, the recipient of the award must fall into at least one of a few different categories. They have to be dead or rendered sterile. Not sure if the nominee has children but he’s definitely not dead. More on that later. They have to exhibit astoundingly stupid judgement, caused their own demise, and be capable of sound judgement. That last one might disqualify this nominee and I’ll also explain that in more detail later as well. Lastly, the event must be verified, and it must not have injured any innocent bystanders.”
“The reason why this is an unofficially official nomination is because the person I’m nominating is still alive and kicking. That’s a great Nonpoint song by the way. My nominee is Mr. Konrad Raab. A former Cross-Hemisphere Champion and perennial challenger for the Chaos Championship. This guy is damn near 60 and is bound and determined to continue fighting in matches without any rules or safeguards in place. I could fill a full notebook with the amount of Chaos matches this dude has been in. Unfortunately, I could count on one hand, maybe, how many Chaos matches he’s actually won.”
He pauses again and flips through a couple pages.
“Ah Ha!” he says before continuing. “On top of refusing to take a safer route in his old age, this crazy bastard is also an avid race car driver. And not the little go-karts at your local family friendly establishment, my dude. The big monster ones that way over 3,000lbs. Bro. I get being a thrill-seeker. Most people do a lot of that in their 20s and 30s when their bodies can handle it better. OR as some sort of mid-life crisis. Mr. Konrad Raab is none of those things. Which is exactly why he deserves to be nominated.”
“Mr. Konrad Raab has repeatedly entered these lawless contests without considering the fact that he is OLD. AS. FUCK. Like I said on Synergy, I’m trying to save him from himself because he has failed to show he is smart enough to quit while he’s way behind, which goes to show he may not be capable of sound judgement. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over while expecting a different result. Eventually, Mr. Konrad Raab is going to step into that ring for a Chaos Rules Match and not be able to walk back up the ramp when it’s over.”
Ezra tosses the clipboard to the side and places both hands on the top of the podium while staring at the camera.
“Konrad… is dying in the ring really what you want? Unlike Ezekiel, I’m not trying to murder somebody just to get ahead of the competition. BUT… in the words of Ivan Drago… if he dies, he dies.”
He quickly walks out of frame as the camera zooms in towards the clipboard. Once it’s close enough, you can see that the pages Ezra was flipping through were blank.
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“Success is a pile of failure that you are standing on.” – Dave Ramsey
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Instead of sitting inside the doctor’s home office, we join both the doctor and Ezra inside the greenhouse. Ezra had found two camping chairs in a shed next to the doc’s house and moved them into the greenhouse so the two men could meet in a more relaxed fashion.
“I hate to sound like an eavesdropper, although you did have your door open. I heard Nora sounding very upset earlier today. How’s everything going with you two?”
Ezra kicks his feet up onto the edge of a planter and leans back in his chair slightly.
“We’re okay, doc. Knox running his mouth about her just caught her off guard. That’s all. The goofy prick was just trying to mess with my focus.”
“Is that why you lost?”
“Sheesh. Straight to the point, my dude. But no. That’s not why I lost. Sticks and stones and all that. I lost because that’s how the cookie crumbled that not. Knox has been on a tear as of late which is why he’s leading Block A in points at the moment. It’s all good though.”
“Is it bothering you that you lost?”
Ezra takes his feet off the planter and sits up in his seat.
“To be honest? Yeah. A little bit. I was hoping that Zaniac would pull out the victory over Knox last week and that would be somewhat cathartic. Living through Zane vicariously or something like that. Unfortunately, it didn’t happen and now there’s little chance of me getting more points than him.”
The doctor had been taking notes in his book while they were talking but now, he’d set the book down in his lap and looked at Ezra.
“You said before that Knox called you ‘indifferent’. Do you agree with him?”
“I just don’t see the point in engaging somebody like that. There’s no sport in it with him. He just enjoys talking out of his ass all the fuckin’ time. The fact that he tends to win just makes it worse. Like I told him though, you win some and you lose some. I set a goal for the Global Challenge and so far, I’ve accomplished that goal. If I choose to partake in the Challenge next year, I’ll set a higher goal.”
“What was your goal for this year? Shouldn’t your goal be to win the event?”
Ezra shakes his ‘no’ slightly.
“That was my goal last year. And I failed. SPECTACULARLY. This year, I just wanted to earn more points than last year. And I succeeded. I finished with 3 points last year. And going into the final match of the GC, I have 4 points. Even if I somehow manage to lose next week, I still achieved my goal. And before you mention something about the bare minimum, I just want to say that my brain was a scrambled mess going into this and I didn’t want to set the bar too high.”
“That makes a bit of sense, Ezra. And your brain is less of a mess now? Did you check a few things off the list like I asked you to this week?”
“It’s definitely less of a mess, doc. And I managed to complete two of the tasks. Although, a doctor’s appointment seems like an odd task for you to give.”
“You’d been avoiding getting your knee looked at or even talking about it.”
“Yeah. True.”
“What did they have to say about it?”
Ezra sighs and rubs his knee. The human body is weird because it can sometimes sense it’s being talked about and then an itch that previously didn’t bug you has now become a menace. Or an old pain returns to reminds you it’s still there.
“They told me that at some point last year, I partially tore my ACL and meniscus. Not sure when though. It started to heal itself because the body does that. BUT to fully heal, I’ll need surgery. They gave me some physical therapy type exercises to do and told me not to put the surgery off for too long.”
“Why not schedule it now and get it over with?”
“Because the UGWC season just started, doc. Plus, people can fully tear their ACLs and not get surgery and still live a physical life. I don’t even know if I want to go under the knife.”
The doctor began writing again while Ezra continued to talk.
“Plus, I’ve been able to perform well enough with the damaged wheel. They gave me a heavy-duty knee brace to use if I wanted to. I don’t think it’s at that point yet. Yeah, there’s some level of pain involved. I can manage it without having to take a shitload of opiates or something more nefarious. It’s all good.”
“For now,” the doctor says without looking up from his note taking.
“For now. Yeah.”
The doctor finishes his note and looks back up at Ezra.
“What else did you cross of the list this week?”
“I went back to the shop I stole that hat and gloves from. I offered to donate some cash to them since I wasn’t able to return the items. They thanked me for my honesty and opted to not press charges or anything like that. I guess they actually donate winter stuff to less fortunate folks all the time. Which just makes me feel worse about it.”
“In a roundabout way, it’s good that you feel worse about it. Showing remorse for inappropriate actions is a sign of a healthy mind. If you didn’t have remorse over committing a crime, I’d say you need more help than I can give.”
“It felt good to talk to those folks though. Instead of taking a donation, they suggested I come back and volunteer some time at their shop. Put some miles on my soul I guess.”
“Are you?”
“For sure. After Infinity. When we do big events like that, we take a break after. And if Nora can come to visit, we could go together. She loves doing stuff like that.”
“I’d like to ask you a question about…” the doctor pauses slightly to go through his notes, “…the Conquest Championship.”
“Uh… yeah. Sure. What about it?”
“You had mentioned before that the competitors you faced to keep it was quite impressive. Do you think the pressure you put yourself to defend that belt lead to your psychotic episode?”
Ezra’s eyes widen. This is something he’d never thought about. He contributed the mental breakdown to stopping his meds as well as indirect trauma from the damage he’d suffered years prior that lead to him being in a coma.
“I… I don’t know. I-I-I..” he stammers a bit before catching himself. “I never considered that, doc. Maybe it was a factor. That run was my most success since arriving in UGWC. I enjoyed defending that title and etching my name in history. Does this mean being successful lead to me going fuckin’ crazy?”
“Not at all, Ezra. But pressure and stress can be damaging to a fragile mind. And with everything you’ve relayed to me since you’ve been in my care would suggest that your mind is fragile. If you find yourself in a situation like this again, you should be careful and focus on the coping skills we’ve gone over these last few weeks. I don’t want to discourage you from winning matches or trying to gain success here. I just want you to be safe and not go backwards into bad habits. You don’t plan on living here forever so it’s important that you take the opportunity to use what you’ve learned here once you leave.”
“Damn straight I’m not living here forever. No offense, doc. I just miss California.”
“None taken, Ezra. Again, I commend you for choosing to stay and allowing me to help you. You’re a remarkable young man and I believe that you’ll bring good things into this world. For now, I must end this session. I have…”
“A date?!” Ezra says excitedly.
“That’s none of your business, Ezra. And I’d appreciate you staying out my personal affairs,” the doctor says somewhat playfully. He then heads for the exit to the greenhouse.
“Did he just quote Ace Ventura?”
Ezra gets to his feet and collapses the two camping chairs. He sets them next to the door and takes a seat in the spot we’ve seen him in over the past couple of weeks.
“A year or so ago, my outlook on this match and Konrad himself would have been drastically different. Maybe even a few months ago it would’ve been different, bro. I don’t have any sort of respect for the geezer but as of late we do have common ground, Konrad. Even if you don’t want the world to know, people like us have a spotlight on them at all times. Entertainment professionals. Whether it be a camera crew around the arena or Phrixus hiding in the bushes. Which means the world knows we’re both in therapy. Instead of poking fun at you over it or finding something to use against you, I’m going to go a different route. And commend you for it, my dude. Motherfuckers like to act like it’s not manly to seek help from outside sources. And those dudes can kick rocks.”
“Alright. Enough with the niceties. We both don’t like each other at all, and it’s been like that since our very first encounter here. With the rules for the Global Challenge in place, I only got you for ten minutes. Which means that this isn’t going to be your most grueling Chaos Rules match ever. But I promise you that it’s going to be memorable. I’m not going to use any of the typical adages about horses and guns. I’m just going to promise you that this match is going to stand out in your memory. Down the road when you’re on your deathbed, you’re going to remember February 9th when Ezra Wolf ONCE AGAIN beat you at your own game. Bring your giant mace. Bring fire. Bring everything you got. Because I’ll be bringing something you don’t have, Konrad.”
Ezra pulls out a partially smoked joint and lights it up. He takes a few drags to get it fully lit before exhaling a large cloud of smoke.
“HEART.”
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