Post by Travis Pierce on Jul 7, 2024 22:19:09 GMT -5
We see a darkened set, with silhouettes visible of a table with someone sitting behind it. A voiceover is heard from Rob Cartwright.
Cartwright: Ladies and gentlemen, he is the host of The Piercing Truth, you know his name, the Icon of Entertainment, the King of Charisma, he is...TRAVIS PIERCE!
“You Know My Name” by Chris Cornell begins to play, and the lights come on to show a chair sitting backwards behind the desk. A monitor behind the chair shows the logo for The Piercing Truth. The chair slowly turns around, revealing Travis Pierce.
Pierce: Thank you, I am your host, Travis Pierce, coming to you LIVE! from our special set here in the heart of the Piercing Media District, found on the prime real estate of Wrestlestockopolis, right here in the Sonoran Desert at WrestleStock. We're here to bring you up to speed on all the comings and goings around the festival, let you know exactly where you need to be and what you should be doing. Let's take a quick peek around the grounds with our Piercing Correspondents!
Cut to Captain 80's, standing in his Fantasy Funtime Land.
Captain 80's: HELLO TRAVIS!!! GET READY FOR THE ULTIMATE ADVENTURE IN THE HEART OF THE DESERT!!! YEEAHHH!!! TAKE THE PLUNGE AND RIDE THE FALCOR TO YOUR HEART'S CONTENT, AS HERE IN THE FUNTIME FANTASY LAND THINGS ARE ENTIRELY OUT OF CONTROL!!!!!
Cut to what appears to be drone footage of the Devil's District, where the Drunken Buzzsaw, Chaos, is cooking. The camera zips around him, narrowly avoiding swats from Chaos as he absent-mindly shoos it while he attends to his meat. Chaos suddenly squints and snaps to attention, grabbing the drone and flinging it on the ground before stomping on it.
Cut to the Doomsday District, where the Dark Destroyer appears to be holding the camera itself, but it's pointed up his nose.
Dark Destroyer: This is where the evil hap-
Cut back to Travis at his desk.
Pierce: As you can see, it's mayhem out there. Somebody has to lead the way. Somebody has to take control. Somebody...has to conquer it all. That's where I come in. I look at what this festival has become, the path it's taken since I truly put it on the map, and it's clear what has to happen. Riley Reverend Reed. Henry Touissant. Sean Parker. Tommasso Ferrari. We think these people are going to be able to conquer all the districts? I hardly think so. These people can't bear the burden of that responsibility. That's where I come in.
Travis Pierce, the Icon of Entertainment. The man who made WrestleStock what it is today. It falls to me to step up and do what has to be done. Some people were born to conquer planets. I will conquer the districts. Once that's done, I'll build on this victory and finally avenge myself upon Larry Tact and take the Conquest Title from him.
Do not understand the power and might of the Travii. We are many. There's an entire festival out there, and the Travii are here. The Travii are everywhere. Just remember that it's not my fault that the truth...hurts.
Fade out...
Cartwright: Ladies and gentlemen, he is the host of The Piercing Truth, you know his name, the Icon of Entertainment, the King of Charisma, he is...TRAVIS PIERCE!
“You Know My Name” by Chris Cornell begins to play, and the lights come on to show a chair sitting backwards behind the desk. A monitor behind the chair shows the logo for The Piercing Truth. The chair slowly turns around, revealing Travis Pierce.
Pierce: Thank you, I am your host, Travis Pierce, coming to you LIVE! from our special set here in the heart of the Piercing Media District, found on the prime real estate of Wrestlestockopolis, right here in the Sonoran Desert at WrestleStock. We're here to bring you up to speed on all the comings and goings around the festival, let you know exactly where you need to be and what you should be doing. Let's take a quick peek around the grounds with our Piercing Correspondents!
Cut to Captain 80's, standing in his Fantasy Funtime Land.
Captain 80's: HELLO TRAVIS!!! GET READY FOR THE ULTIMATE ADVENTURE IN THE HEART OF THE DESERT!!! YEEAHHH!!! TAKE THE PLUNGE AND RIDE THE FALCOR TO YOUR HEART'S CONTENT, AS HERE IN THE FUNTIME FANTASY LAND THINGS ARE ENTIRELY OUT OF CONTROL!!!!!
Cut to what appears to be drone footage of the Devil's District, where the Drunken Buzzsaw, Chaos, is cooking. The camera zips around him, narrowly avoiding swats from Chaos as he absent-mindly shoos it while he attends to his meat. Chaos suddenly squints and snaps to attention, grabbing the drone and flinging it on the ground before stomping on it.
Cut to the Doomsday District, where the Dark Destroyer appears to be holding the camera itself, but it's pointed up his nose.
Dark Destroyer: This is where the evil hap-
Cut back to Travis at his desk.
Pierce: As you can see, it's mayhem out there. Somebody has to lead the way. Somebody has to take control. Somebody...has to conquer it all. That's where I come in. I look at what this festival has become, the path it's taken since I truly put it on the map, and it's clear what has to happen. Riley Reverend Reed. Henry Touissant. Sean Parker. Tommasso Ferrari. We think these people are going to be able to conquer all the districts? I hardly think so. These people can't bear the burden of that responsibility. That's where I come in.
Travis Pierce, the Icon of Entertainment. The man who made WrestleStock what it is today. It falls to me to step up and do what has to be done. Some people were born to conquer planets. I will conquer the districts. Once that's done, I'll build on this victory and finally avenge myself upon Larry Tact and take the Conquest Title from him.
Do not understand the power and might of the Travii. We are many. There's an entire festival out there, and the Travii are here. The Travii are everywhere. Just remember that it's not my fault that the truth...hurts.
Fade out...
