Synergy #9 Results - June 28th 2010

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: This is Synergy! It's two weeks since Revolution and the UGWC Entertainment Professionals are ready to bring you more exciting, hard hitting and shocking action tonight!

Lieberjosch: More?

Vinegar: Revolution was a huge success, and was a great night for Donovan Hastings, John Russo, The Blessed Beards and Jet Somers who all were victorious in their title matches, and Andy Savana who set himself up as Cross Hemisphere Number 1 Contender, a shot he gets tonight.

Lieberjosch: But first we have to get the garbage wrestling out of the way first, do we really need to even air these Chaos matches? Now that Jet has dropped his weapon embargo it will be rare to see anything of note in this division.

Covert Jay: Erm, are you blind? Weapons, they are always noteworthy, especially when someone gets planted in the face with one.

Lieberjosch: luckily for us Duncan Ryder and Travis Pierce are already in the ring and we don't have to witness their entrances, there really is no need to give this match any hype whatsoever...

Covert Jay: Because it hypes itself?

Dennis: The next match is scheduled for one fall and is a Triple Threat Match for the UGWC Chaos Title. The challengers Duncan Ryder and Travis Pierce are already in the ring...

“Everybody Down”

Dennis: Introducing their opponent, the UGWC Chaos Champion....JEEEEEEEEEEEETTT SOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMEEEEERRRRSSS!!!

Vinegar: At Revolution Jet Somers wont he match, but he also dropped his restraint when it comes to using weapons, Deimos claimed it as a moral victory, but clearly The Wild Card disputes that.

Lieberjosch: In honesty, what use is a morale victory? It's only ever use is to console losers, like Phrixus. Do you ever hear Champions have to clutch at straws and claim morale victories?

Vinegar: it is rare, I'll give you that...

Covert Jay: The only victory worth having is a Ninja Victory...

Lieberjosch: One no-one else ever knows about?

Covert Jay: Not no-one, just not non-ninja's, like you.

Vinegar: Now the title is handed over the ropes, and the match is ready to get underway, can Jet Somers retain his title once more...

[As soon as the bell is rung both Ryder and Pierce exit the ring on different sides and go searching for weapons under the ring, whilst Jet Somers just stands with a grin from ear to ear, shaking his head slightly. Both men rush into the ring, Travis clutching a chair and Duncan wielding a Kendo stick, both men run and swing at Jet, almost as one, but Somers lets out a wry smile and drops to his chest in a split second, leaving both men to unleash their armoury upon the other. Needless to say both men crumple to the floor and Jet Somers is able to stand to his feet.

Pierce scuttles over to the ropes and uses them to drag himself to his feet, as Duncan Ryder who already looks like he's taken one beating this week starts to get to his knee's. Jet aims a kick at the younger half of the Royal 1st Battalion, but Captain Ryder manages to grab hold of it and spin Somers round into the path of a flying forearm from Pierce. Duncan grabs his Kendo stick and slams it across the ribs of the downed Jet Somers before laying it across his throat and then dropping a leg on it. The Kendo stick snaps and Jet rolls on the floor clutching his throat....]

Vinegar: My god, Jet's neck is bleeding!

[The chaos champion si indeed bleeding, and he pulls out a splinter nearly and inch wide, and the doctors out their can tell it narrowly missed his jugular, but it must be causing Somers some great pain. Duncan and Travis have yet to see this as they battle with one another, Travis though manages to grab the chair and swing it towards Duncan, but Duncan ducks,kicks Pierce in the midsection, and then DDT's him straight onto the chair]

Lieberjosch: Captain Duncan Ryder has the big mo, and is looking good to be the nhext Chaos Champion.

[But as Duncan gets up he fails to see Jet stagger onto his feet, and with one great deal of effort leaps onto the second rope...]

Vinegar: JETSTREAMER!

1...

2...

3!!!

Dennis: Here is your winner, and STILL UGWC CHAOS CHAMPION, JJJJJEEEEEETTTT SSSSSOOOOOOOMMMMMEEEEEERRRRSSS!!!

Vinegar: jet Somers retains his title, but at what price, Duncan Ryder certainly did not mean it, but he has inflicted a severe wound on the Chaos Champion here tonight, and the EMT's are already rushing to ringside to gather up the Chaos Champion who just rolls off of Ryder and passes out, most likely through lack of blood.

Covert Jay: And you said nothing noteworthy would happen!

Lieberjosch: You're a barbarian!

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: We’ve already had a thrilling Chaos Championship Match, and we’re only just getting started, here on Synergy!

Lieberjosch: Why do you always insist on reminding people the name of the show? Do you think they just blundered onto this website by accident?

Covert Jay: Isn’t that how you got your job?

Lieberjosch: That’s a ridiculous assertion, and the pot calling the kettle black, no less.

Covert Jay: And THAT is ridiculous, the kettle is magenta.

"Given to fly" by Pearl Jam hits as Enigma appears hanging from the rafters, wearing the CWA world title. As Eddie Vedder sings the line "He's flying", Enigma jumps off as if on que and soars around the ring due to the fact that he is attatched to a guy wire which allows him to gradually soar to a turnbuckle. As soon as he lands, he detatches the wire and allows it to accend as he unhooks the title from his waist and holds it up for the crowd as cameras start going off everywhere. He then jumps down and rolls his neck before awaiting the start of the match.

Mitchell: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Brisbane, Australia, representing the Aussie Rebels, ENIIGGGGGGGMMAAAAAAA!!!!!

Vinegar: The match we’re about to see actually has its roots in events that occurred last month, when Enigma came to the aid of Jet Somers when he was attacked by the man who is Engima’s opponent here tonight.

Lieberjosch: That was a waste of breath the likes of which I haven’t heard in years.

Vinegar: What do you mean?

Lieberjosch: They had a run-in with a chair last month, and the Consortium just got around to throwing them together now. Keep it simple, stupid.

Covert Jay: It’s the KISS method!

“Phucking Phreak” begins to play, and Phrixus Deimos creeps down the ramp.

Mitchell: And his opponent, the Embodiment of Fear, PHRIXUS DEIIIIIIIMM0SSSS!!!

Lieberjosch: Look at the way Deimos stalks his prey, he is going to take Enigma apart like-

Vinegar: Enigma leaps over the ropes and takes Deimos down with a crossbody tackle!

Lieberjosch: Hold on, Demios wasn’t ready!

Covert Jay: It was a stealth attack, like ninja!

Lieberjosch: That’s a dirty tactic from Enigma!

Vinegar: You just said Deimos was stalking his prey.

Lieberjosch: I don’t need to have my own words repeated back to me, I was there when I said them!

Vinegar: Enigma rolling Deimos into the ring, Hazel East signals that the match is officially under way!

DING DING!

Vinegar: Enigma comes off the ropes and charges, but Deimos floors him with a clothesline, and he shakes his arm for a moment before delivering a kick to the fallen Enigma.

Lieberjosch: If Deimos found Enigma to be irritating before, he must want to tear him completely apart after that little stunt a moment ago.

Vinegar: Deimos with a snap DDT, and a quick cover!




1!!!!!




2!!!!!




DING DING!!!!!




Lieberjosch: That was fast!

Vinegar: Too fast, Hazel East did not count the three, she’s waving that bell off, Claude de Rhombus jumping the gun a bit.

Rhombus: I did not!

Covert Jay: Are you not the keeper of the bell?

Rhombus: Well, apparently they’ll give them to just about anybody these days.

Covert Jay: True. I’ve got one in my ninja mask right now.

Vinegar: Deimos with another kick, but Enigma catches the leg from the ground, kips up, and an Enziguri kick!

Covert Jay: It was a bit of ninja spirit that came to his aid!

Vinegar: An impressive reversal, and now Enigma knocks Deimos down with a drop kick, now a cover!




1!!!!!




2!!!!!




Vinegar: And a kick out by Deimos, who may have underestimated his foe!

Lieberjosch: Deimos underestimates nothing, surely he planned for this!

Vinegar: Enigma whips Deimos into the corner…

Lieberjosch: FAINTING!!!!

Vinegar: But Enigma counters with Desperado!!!!

Covert Jay: Most impressive!

Vinegar: Another cover!




1!!!!!




2!!!!!




Vinegar: And another kick out!

Lieberjosch: Deimos is just luring Enigma into his trap.

Vinegar: Enigma pulls Deimos up…

Covert Jay: THUNDER CHILD!!!

Vinegar: But Deimos float off the back!

Lieberjosch: NUMBING!!!

Vinegar: Deimos stumbles back into the corner, but he lifts himself up onto the ropes, there it is, Meteor Press, and a cover!!!!




1!!!!!




2!!!!!




3!!!!!




Mitchell: Here is your winner, PHRIXUS DEIIIIIMMMM0SSSSSS!!!!!

Lieberjosch: See, I told you!

Vinegar: Deimos looked to be overwhelmed by Enigma, but he pulls out the victory!

Lieberjosch: What you should never underestimate is the advantage of experience and a veteran presence, and if tonight wasn’t proof enough, go read Article 14!

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: Ladies and Gentlemen, what a night we have had for you already!

Lieberjosch: Bah! It’s been mostly real wrestlers taking on flippy Midgets and showing them why they are the future of the company!

Covert Jay: You mean Flippy Ninja’s showing of their awesome ninja powers to the non-believers!

Lieberjosch: Non-beli.....No self respecting fan of Sports Entertainment would stand for the incompetence of the high flyer...

Vinegar: Please Dennis, cut over them.

Dennis: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome...from WESTERN AUSTRALIA............ESKIMOOOOOOO JOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A fair cheer comes up for the Alternate rock group as Kavyen Temperly, Joel Quatermain, and Stewart MacLeod make their way up onto the ‘Ground Zero Band’ stage.

Kavyen: Hey Southern Cali!

Another fair cheer emits from the audience

Kavyen: We have to say, performing right here tonight, in front of all of you here, and all of those watching over their computer monitors at home is the biggest honour we have had.

Fans Cheer

Kavyen: This song we are going to play, is one of our biggest songs, it’s called Black Fingernails, Red Wine!

The band starts up the introduction to the song to a fair reception by those who know the song.

Kavyen: Black fingernails, red wine
I wanna make you, all mine
A lot of people, underground
You wanna get there
You gotta go straight down, straight down

(JK walks out in a seemingly happy pose, albeit he seems a little troubled. He approaches the mic and begins to do the duet part of his entrance)

Kavyen + JK: There's a culture, everywhere
Smoke clouds, hang in the air
It's so loud, can't hear you talk
You and I, should take a walk downtown

Straight down
Downtown
Straight down

(JK starts to march down to the ring, High fiving several of the fans and even going as far as to sign some autographs, although there is less joy in his eyes and he doesn’t really give as much eye contact as he normally does)

Kavyen: The argument over god continues
In this house
All of us stand and point our fingers
At the ground
All of us stand and point our fingers
Straight down

Red-letter day, black heart
Its gonna tear you, all apart
It's so loud; can't hear you call
You and I, are gonna fall straight down

Straight down
Downtown
Straight down

(JK walks around to the edge of the ring, and climbs up onto the apron of the ring)

Kavyen: The argument over god continues
In this house
All of us stand and point our fingers
At the ground
Argument over all continues
In this house
All of us stand and point our fingers
Straight down

(JK continues to look out into the audience before climbing up onto the turnbuckle and posing)

Kavyen: Black fingernails, red wine
I wanna make you, all mine
A lot of people, underground
You wanna get there, you gotta go straight down

The argument over god continues
In this house
All of us stand and point our fingers
At the ground
Argument over all continues
In this house
All of us stand and point our fingers
Straight down

(JK finally gets into the ring and picks up a microphone that is lying on the canvas)

JK: Thank you ESKIMO JOE!

The crowd cheers in appreciation

JK: Well, I’m not really feeling like doing another long winded intro tonight, namely for the same reason as to why I am not even competing tonight, So down to business. Our latest guest is someone who toppled the impressive winning streak of Travis Roberts, only to form a cohesive tag team unit....or are they really? Please welcome the Lord Chief, DONOVAN HASTINGS!!!!

“Immortal” hits the speakers as Donovan Hastings makes his way out to the ring followed by none other than Calypso Desmona, and the ‘Niglet’ Owen Peterson. Donovan awaits at the side of the ring for a few seconds before looking over at Owen and motioning towards the ropes. Owen sighs before climbing up onto the ring apron and opening the ropes for Donovan to enter. Once he does, he exchanges greetings with JK and accepts the Mic that JK has held out for him.

JK: Thanks for taking the time out of your busy schedule to speak here tonight.

Donovan: Your Lord, the Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion, always has time for the little people.

JK: Well, first off, congratulations on the win at the Pay Per View, what’s your opinion on what transpired after Dirge lost for a third time against you?

Donovan: Some people just can't face reality. When things don't go their way, they have to blame others. I think everyone would agree, I'd have handled such a loss much differently.

JK: Do you think that there might be a Dirge, Hastings four if he decides to come back from his temper tantrum?

Donovan: Why not? History has a way of repeating itself. Honestly, I don't get what he really has to throw a tantrum about. Dirge has had a lot of success and picked up a number of big wins, including one over you, might I add. There is no shame in being #2.

JK: Tonight, you are not in the main event, which is something that I am sure not too many people are used to, what are your thoughts on playing the high card while Russo takes on Savana for the Cross-Hemisphere championship?

Donovan: The Cross-Hemisphere Championship is a historic title that deserves to be spot-lighted. I would know, being a former title-holder myself.

JK: Do you have any qualms with the Consortium seeing as they have pitted you against one of the people you beat at Revolution?

Donovan: Beating Medos down gets boring after a while, but I've got one more in me.

JK: Now, one thing that has been on the minds of many for at least a month or so now, revolves around you and Travis Roberts. It seems that you’ve both been finding other partners, Travis with Tyvola, and you with Jet Somers and Alex Kiseragi, albeit you haven’t really teamed with them in the past few weeks, I have to ask, is this the end of Blessed Immortality?

Donovan: That's a rediculous assertion. TWiSTeD is an entity that is all encompassing, and it is TWiSTeD that holds the Co-operative Championship. Travis and Tyvola are merely the ones carrying that burden for the current time. Tyvola is standing in for me because of my other pressing responsibilities as the World Heavyweight Champion. There's nothing more to it, I'll thank you for not reading any further into it.

JK: Thanks again Donovan, I’ll let you get back to preparing for your Revolution re-match against Medos later tonight.

Donovan: And I'll let you get back to referring to me as Lord, I'm certain that was just a slip of the tongue just now.

JK: Remember, World Heavyweight Champion Donovan Hastings can only be seen competing on UGWC, and he will be tonight, be sure to stay logged in for what will be an awesome match.

‘Immortality’ re-hits as JK and Donovan exchange a handshake. They both make their way out to the backstage respectively.

Vinegar: Did anyone else think there was something wrong with JK?

Lieberjosch: Hey, he quickened this little segment. That’s an improvement to me.

Covert Jay: Hmmmm, my Ninja sense tells me that something is happening in the little Ninja’s life...

Vinegar: What the hell is a Ninja sense anyway?

Covert: It’s something that every Ninja is born with. It allows us to tap into the cosmos and be in touch with our surrounds.

Lieberjosch: You do not have any “Ninja Sense” and any thought of such is complete lunacy!

Vinegar: Please cut to commercial before they fight again...

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: Ladies and gentlemen, once again thank you for joining us tonight for Synergy!

Lieberjosch: You really do pander don’t you?

Jay: The professor is pondering the play by plays pandering!?!

Vinegar: I do not pander.

Lieberjosch: Article 81 discussed the fallacy of the so called support trying to get over at the expense of the talent. You haven’t read it have you?

Jay: Perhaps he ran out of toilet tissue.

Vinegar: I would rather not have our little intro degrade into a discussion of what goes on in my bathroom.

Lieberjosch: Well that we can agree on.

Jay: Anyone want to know about what I do in the potty?

Vinegar: Mitchell!

Dennis: I’m on it. Pervs and sex holes, the following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a triple threat match! Introducing first, standing six foot one inch, weighting in at 233 pounds, this is Ddddddavid ‘HHHitmaaaaaan’ Llllloooooooooopes!

Sonny Sandoval is heard over the P.A. saying "Lights out...." as the arena then goes dark. "...Word on the streets is the boys is back". The intro of "Lights Out" starts as the arena is flashing white lights and the entrance is filled with smoke. As the lyrics starts, "Hitman" with “Dynamite” emerges from the smoke looking down then warms himself up by jumping in place then throws his head up as well as the east coast sign in the air, as pyro goes off to his sides. He walks down the rampway bopping his head to the music and high-fives fans on each side. He then hops onto the ring apron and walks to his right to the turnbuckle left of the main ring-camera and steps up the outside of the turnbuckle and proceeds to throw the east coast sign up ala. the Rock. He drops down and slingshots himself over the top rope and runs to the turnbuckle to the right of the main ring camera and proceeds with the gesture.

Vinegar: This will be the first time seeing the Brick City Boyz in action in quite awhile.

Lieberjosch: Completely negating any chance of profiting from their entrance from the LWF.

Jay: Are we already on step 3?

Lieberjosch: No you twit. Listen the simple fact of this business is you have to strike when the iron is hot. Their little vacation set them behind. People were hot for the BCB at the close of the LWF. They can into the UGWC with the full support of the management, and you know this because of all the stupid poorly made merchandise that had their ugly logo on. Well then instead of pushing the matter, demanding a rematch for the titles they lost, then up and disappear.

Vinegar: And now they have to start at the bottom, but looking at David Lopes and Derick Felix I don’t think they mind so much.

Lieberjosch: No you don’t think.

Dennis: And his opponent, standing six foot even, weighting in at 190 pounds, he is the Original Aboriginal, this is Paulllll Cockaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatoo!

A Dijerido is heard playing in the arena as a shot of some kangaroos bounding off into the sunset is shown on the UGWC-a-tron before the opening Riff for "Beds are burning" by Midnight Oil takes over the P.A. system as "the original Aboriginal" makes his way down to the ring, smiling a big smile showing blindingly white teeth. as he walks down, he high fives a couple of fans, and if he can, manages to take a peek down some hot girls tops. he slides into the ring, and does an air drum solo to the drum solo of beds are burning, before flashing another smile to the crowd and awaiting his opponent.

Lieberjosch: And to further prove my point. Look at Lopes. He looks generally shocked that Paul Cockatoo is in the ring. Can’t say that I blame him though.

Jay: Where’s Sheena?

Vinegar: Well the card said just Cockatoo. No ‘with’ attached, so it looks like he’s going at it alone.

Jay: That’s sad.

Lieberjosch: You should go stand in his corner. Go, really, get away from me.

Dennis: And their opponent. Standing six foot nine inches, weighting in at 376 pounds, he is one half of the Cooperative Champions, he is the Mountain Madman, this is Tyyyyyyyyyyyyyvoooollaaa!

The lights go out kicking on a red glow from under the ramp. ‘Come Together’ kicks in and Tyvola lumbers out from the back leaning over to the nothing at his right side, and following closely behind Travis Roberts. He has his Co-Op title dragging behind him which upon reaching ringside holds out to his right, and drops on the floor before climbing into the ring.

Vinegar: And now it’s Cockatoo who looks surprised.

Jay: I think scarred.

Lieberjosch: Wait. I know what’s happening.

Vinegar: Well then perhaps you should enlighten us.

Lieberjosch: Perhaps you’d need a flow chart to follow my complex thought patterns.

Jay: You’re aunt flo is in town.

Lieberjosch: At least when I’m talking the cat burglar shuts up. OK, here goes. In Cockatoo’s case. He is scarred. Petrified really, and I can’t say I blame him. If I thought I was facing Tyvola, that magnificent monster, I’d do everything in my power to convince myself I was facing that washed up hippy Travis Roberts too. Wait that is Travis Roberts, right?

Vinegar: A bit of a cleaned up look, but yes I’m being told that’s the Headliner.

Jay: Extreme make over!

Lieberjosch: Regardless, that explains Cockatoo’s position. For Lopes? Well let me just say that if I was David Lopes, first of all I’d shoot myself. And secondly after hearing I had a match with the Jackal of Jwar Isle I would be so focused on facing that behemoth that I wouldn’t let anything distract me. Not even the other opponent.

Vinegar: And Sam Green calls for the bell!

The action is slow to start with both Lopes and Cockatoo staying cautiously out of reach of Tyvola. Eventually Lopes ends up behind Tyvola who is cornering Paul, and Hitman makes the first move with a chop block to the big man. Tyvola turns which allows Cockatoo to chop block the giant, and this sets up an informal unity between the two.

Lopes and Cockatoo both opting to try to out race the Bearded Bastard begin a very fast paced assault filled with misdirection, hit and run, and peppered with drop kicks. Tyvola stays on his feet shrugging off most of the damage until Lopes and Cockatoo manage to Irish Whip Tyvola to the ropes, Lopes follows but stays out of sight on the rebound, Cockatoo hits the mat, Tyvola rebounds again, Cockatoo hits the mat, and Lopes nails The Silencer straight thrust kick that floors Tyvola.

Lopes motions for Paul to help pick up Tyvola, and they cinch in for a double suplex. Tyvola blocks the first attempt, blocks the second, and gains control on the third. A double noggin knocker later, and Lopes takes a knee. Tyvola heaves Cockatoo into the air, and unceremoniously dumps him over the top rope to the arena floor. He turns, and meets a charging Lopes with a big boot that floors Hitman.

Tyvola peels David off the mat, and slams him down hard enough with a body slam to cause Lopes to end in the seated position. Tyvola proceeds to push the Hitman’s head to the left exposing the right shoulder, and begins hammering away with clubbing forearms to Lopes’ collar bone. The Mountain Madman ends the assault with a damnable stomp to Lopes’ shoulder that cause the Hitman to crumple under the weight before trying to roll to the outside.

Tyvola attempts to follow and pick up Lopes, but as he nears the ropes Cockatoo comes out of nowhere with a running knee on the apron that staggers Tyvola as Lopes collapses at ringside next to Roberts. Cockatoo nails a missile drop kick that sends Tyvola to the canvas as Felix rushes to the aid of his partner laying near Roberts. The two exchange words, and begin getting in each other’s face while Lopes slinks out of sight.

Cockatoo waits for Tyvola to get back to his feet, and no sooner than he does, Cockatoo hits a running clothesline to the massive mauler. Then another, a third, Tyvola’s still on his feet, but a forth backs him into the corner. Cockatoo with a head of steam and a leaping forearm rocks Tyvola as the Sam Green attempts to calm the escalating situation at ringside.

Cockatoo motions for Tyvola to step out of the corner, a kick to the gut, a Fall from Ularu, NO Cockatoo can’t pull Tyvola over. Ty hoists Paul up fully off the mat, and sends him into the corner where he begins shot after shot to the either side of Native Garret’s head.

That’s when Lopes gets back into the ring with his Brick City Boyz trademarked bat. A shot to the back of Tyvola get’s shrugged off, as Lopes expected. He begs Tyvola to turn around and the Jackal of Jwar Isle is met with a homerun swing to the dome when he does. Miraculously he stays on his feet. Out on his feet, but on his feet. A second swing takes care of that as the lights go out, and with a thunderous crash Tyvola hits the mat. Lopes tosses the bat away before Sam Green turns around, and attempts a pin.

Cockatoo breaks it up at two with a seated senton. Cockatoo picks up Lopes and the two begin exchanging rights and lefts until Lopes feints a kick, then shoots for the Boom! Headshot spinning round house. Cockatoo ducks, ends up behind Lopes, spins him around for a Fall from Ularu, but Lopes steps in pulls Cockatoo back, and in one fluid motion nailing the Blackout for the three count.

Dennis: Ladies and Gentlemen here is your winner Ddddddavid ‘HHHitmaaaaaan’ Llllloooooooooopes!!!

Vinegar: And Roberts looks SHOCKED!

Lieberjosch: Roberts! What about me!

Jay: I missed the Brick City Boyz. So glad to have them back.

The scene cuts to the locker room where Duncan Ryder is sat on a bench wincing as he seems to be checking his assorted bruises and pulled muscles from the Chaos Title match. He looks up to his left, screen right as we hear a door close and Johnny Blake appears to a chorus of boos from the fans in the arena.

“I’m sorry.” Duncan says before Johnny can open his mouth. “I could have- If I’d just-”

“Oh shut it.” Johnny snaps back. “No-one expected you to win anyway.”

Duncan smirks slightly and slowly shakes his head. “You know why I like you? You bring out the best in people.” he says sarcastically.

Johnny slaps him upside the head. “Watch it.” he hisses and points down at his partner. He lowers his finger. “Doesn’t matter anyway, that match wasn’t important.”

“It wasn’t?” Duncan asks, confused.

“Course not. You left Somers with something to think about anyway. Now come on. I thought of something.” Johnny says, making to leave and gesturing for Duncan to follow him.

“What is it?”

Johnny scowls. “You’ll see later now get the bloody hell up and follow me. We’ve got stuff to do.”

Johnny disappears off the screen. Duncan rolls his eyes and get to his feet with another wince before following him out.

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: An exciting match-up coming next.

Lieberjosch: Do you really believe that?

Vinegar: Of course. We’re going to see two-thirds of our Revolution Pay Per View main event right here on free internet.

Jay: Missed Revolution? Check the website for information on when you can catch up.

Lieberjosch: Yes but the third missing was the good bit.

Vinegar: Yeah well never mind.

The lights dim to a near blackout, as all you can see on the Globaltron is the words: "He Is Here!" Suddenly, an explosion erupts from the stage as "Firefly" by Breaking Benjamin starts up. Medos appears just as the chorus starts. He walks to the front of the stage, looks around, raises one hand up slowly, then throws it down as yet another explosion appears from behind him. The screen is showing Medos wrestling with several other wrestlers from previous matches.

Dennis: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from England! Medoooooos!!!

Lieberjosch: Medos came up short once again when it came to the crunch at Revolution.

Vinegar: Against tough competition he put up a good fight. Unfortunately someone had to lose.

Medos carries on walking down, he slaps hands with one fan, and walks past the others. He rolls into the ring, and towards an turnbuckle. He points at the fans, raises his hand to his forehead, sticks his index and middle finger out, and salutes the fans. He then prepares himself.

Immortal starts to play and Donovan Hastings makes his way out onto the stage, draped in his long cloak. He stops to make his trademark wide armed pose.

Dennis: And his opponent! From Hartford, Connecticut! Weighing in at 230lbs! The UGWC World Heavyweight Champion! Donovaaaaan Haaastiiiiings!!!

Vinegar: Donovan Hastings made the first ever defence of the UGWC World Heavyweight title a successful one just two weeks ago. That’s going to give him a lot of momentum going into this match.

Donovan makes his way down to the ring, ignoring the cheers of the crowd as he glares coldly towards Medos. He removes his cape outside the ring and lays it down before climbing up the steps and through the ropes.

Vinegar: Both men are in the ring.

Ding! Ding!

Vinegar: And this one is ready to go. Both men circle then shoot to tie up the middle of the ring. Hastings swiftly puts in an arm wringer and kicks Medos in the back on the leg, dropping him to his knees.

Lieberjosch: I think we can expect to simply see Hastings overpower Medos here. He’s done so before and that was without Medos in the deflated state he’s been in recently.

Jay: I didn’t think he’d even showed up.

Vinegar: Hastings really tightening the twist on that arm and just throws a punch into that elbow.

Jay: Has Hastings been training ninja joint techniques?

Lieberjosch: No! He’s been training technical wrestling you fool.

Vinegar: That shot clearly jarred him and Hastings wrenches it down to drop Medos onto his face. Now with the knee behind the shoulder and Hastings continuing to lever that arm back.

Lieberjosch: The pain is already beginning to show on Medos’s face.

Vinegar: Hastings lets up on the hold and stands but just stamps Medos’s arm into the ground. That was brutal.

Jay: Well that’s what you get for not cutting a promo.

Lieberjosch: What? You think Donovan Hastings is angry because Medos didn’t hype the match enough?

Jay: Don’t be ridiculous. That’s not it.

Lieberjosch: Oh.

Jay: But everyone knows if you don’t do a promo and the other person does you’ll lose.

Lieberjosch: Do you know what he’s talking about?

Vinegar: No idea. Medos pushing up his feet but Hastings is on him and pulls him the rest of the way. He’s got control of the neck and brings down some clubbing blows to the back and shoulder. Falling arm breaker!

Lieberjosch: The logic of targeting a body part in undeniable but I wonder if The Champion would be better targeting a leg.

Jay: Don’t work the leg. Everyone works the leg.

Vinegar: Ha!

Lieberjosch: What?

Vinegar: Never mind. Hastings goes back to stomping down on the left arm of Medos and the English Enigma has no choice but to scramble away and escape under the bottom rope.

Jay: Medos’s ninja skills seem to be lacking. He should have used a smoke bomb.

Vinegar: The Lord Chief isn’t happy about that and drops out after him. Medos turns and strikes back. A hard forearm shot catches Hastings in the jaw. He’s trying to use the single collar tie to control the head and unleash a flurry of shots.

Jay: That’s more like it.

Vinegar: But The Immortal brings a hook into Medos’s elbow one again and he recoils in pain. Hastings isn’t going to let up. He charges at Medos and tackles him back first into the crowd barrier.

Lieberjosch: They need to be careful. Glenn Burke won’t hesitate to count them both out here.

Vinegar: And Medos’s head goes into the corner post. Hastings drives his head into the metal. He’s got the arm again- Swings that into the corner post too. That arm has been destroyed.

Lieberjosch: The Lord Chief can probably finish this match at will now.

Vinegar: He rolls Medos into the ring again at the count of 9 and follows him in. Medos trying to use the ropes to get to his feet but Hastings has him again and drives him face first into the turnbuckle. Knife edge chop to the body.

Jay: Medos is fighting back!

Vinegar: Medos with an overhand chop of his own and shoves Hastings back. He launches out of the corner and-

Lieberjosch: Misses entirely.

Vinegar: A wild right hook gets ducked by Hastings, Medos spins right around and Hastings hits him with an atomic drop, sending him back to the corner. The Lord of Pain locks in a hammerlock on that bad arm and lands more shots to the elbow.

Lieberjosch: We can hear Medos’s pain from here.

Vinegar: And now Hastings lifting him up and sitting him on the top turnbuckle. The Immortal is going up after him.

Lieberjosch: Oh why? This is an unnecessary risk.

Vinegar: Both men stood on the top rope. Hammerlock Superplex! This must be over.

Lieberjosch: Not quite yet.

Vinegar: Hastings locks in an armbar on the mat and Medos immediately taps.

Ding! Ding! Ding!

Dennis: Here is your winner! Donovaaaaaaan Haaaaastiiiiings!!!

Lieberjosch: No surprise there.

Vinegar: It really was domination from start to finish.

Jay: I told you. No promo.

Vinegar: And Hastings showing quite a mean streak. He’s proven his title defence was no fluke though and heading into In Your Hands where there’s no way to prepare for your opponent, Hastings is showing that he can take on anyone. Next up is a Cross-Hemisphere title match and the first defence since John Russo captured the title. Don’t miss it.

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

We see the plush surroundings of an executive office, glass windows reach from floor to ceiling, stretching out beyond them is a sprawling city mass, and the room quite clearly towers above every other building in sight. A large glass desk sits in front of this magnificent sight, and behind it sits a balding man, with a look of assurance that rests firmly on his face, the Unified Global Wrestling Coalitions Creative Division’s Head, ‘The Auteur’ Moss Edwards. He forms a pyramid with his fingers as the camera zooms in on him, and he leans into the camera and smiles.

Moss: Two weeks ago, during UGWC Revolution, I teased you about our next extravaganza, the return of In Your Hands. Tonight, I come to you with more exciting details.

Moss: Each week this month, you, the UGWC fans, will vote on an aspect of the In Your Hands card, something different each week and ending with your select of the challenger to the World Heavyweight Title itself. THIS week, you’ll be voting on the weapons that will be available to be used during the Chaos Championship Match.

Moss: Thirty weapons are available to be used, and no less than five will be in play at In Your Hands. Vote this week on which you’d like to see, and we’ll announce one each week for the rest of this month.

Moss: Next week on Synergy their will also be two qualification matches to determine candidates for the In Your Hands Main Event for the World Heavyweight Title and we’ll be back again with another In Your Hands vote!

Moss: We return you now to Synergy!

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: It's been a great show coming off the back of the tremendously successful Revolution PPV, and it's now time for our main event, with John Russo making a swift first defence of his title against Andy Savana.

Lieberjosch: At least we have a fighting champion, unlike his predecessor who made his potential challengers jump through hoops for an entire month under the awful disguise of building the titles prestige, when everyone could see it was just so he could extend his reign.

Covert Jay: A Dragon, possessive of it's gold? Hardly shocking is it?

Vinegar: Whatever you think of Alex Kiseragi's reign, it did indeed help the titles stature it was a huge talking point all last month, and it could prove to be the same this month.

Dennis: The next match is scheduled for one fall and is for the UGWC Cross-Hemisphere Title...

'Bullet With Butterfly Wings'

Dennis: Introducing first, The Challenger, from Texas...AAAAAANNNNDDDDYYYYY SSSSAAAAAAAAAVVVVVVVVAAAANNNNAAAA!!!

Vinegar: Andy Savana was the arguably the biggest success story of Revolution, only the Pay-Per-View before he was the laughing stock of the wrestling world, and now he has a shot at The Cross-Hemisphere championship, and it all started with a shock win over Travis Roberts.

Lieberjosch: And he picked up the momentum from that fluke of a win and has never looked back.

Covert Jay: I suspect narcotics are involved somewhere.

Vinegar: Nothing would surprise me in regards to Andy Savana, rumours are he may have escaped a bomb blast on his way to the show.

Lieberjosch: I haven't seen any news about bomb blasts.

Vinegar: That's the beauty of rumours, you don't ever need to know the full story before repeating them.

Covert Jay: In which case, I did once hear a rumour about yourself, Nick, Danile Hanson you old broadcasting partner, a field of wildebeest and some unpleasant...

Vinegar: Lets move on shall we...

Lieberjosch: No, no. For once I am interested in what this towelled lunatic has to say....

“Shout 2000”

Vinegar: Thank the lords...

Dennis: Introducing the UGWC Cross-Hemisphere Champion, JOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNN RRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUSSSSSSOOOOOO!!!!!

Vinegar: Russo will be looking to avoid an embarrassingly short title reign here tonight...

Covert Jay: Just like you and the Wildebeest story...

Vinegar: No, because Russo's embarrassment would be very real, not entirely fabricated by a bitter ex-colleague. To some people John Russo's victory came as somewhat of a shock, Alex Kiseragi was always considered one of GIW's golden generation, but John Russo managed to disprove any underdog labels with an assured display.

Lieberjosch: He was hungry for it the moment the Alex Kiseragi Stroke My Ego Tournament was announced, and that hunger, desire and motivation took him to the victory, whilst The Dragon's own belief in the 'golden generation' tag left him feeling invincible and cocky.

Vinegar: That's not the Alex Kiseragi I know.

Lieberjosch: But you're not an expert in such matters, you're merely an observer, but your layman's abilities do not probe as deep as mine. I study many things from speech patterns and tones, which offensive moves are used, right down to body language.

Covert Jay: See, that's why your misreading him, he's able to conceal his wings, you cannot see his whole body!

Vinegar: Both men are in the ring now and Brian Chartreuse has handed the title over the ropes and called for the bell, and this match is under way.

Lieberjosch: Both men circle each other, neither willing to make the first move, each trying to get a measure of the other before committing themselves to an assault. Both men see this victory as somewhat necessary to propel their careers even higher, and neither man wants to start out on the back foot...HUH?

Vinegar: The Royal First Battalion have entered the ring...AND CLOTHSLINED ANDY SAVANA WITH A ROLLED UP BRITISH FLAG!

Covert Jay: I suspect something big is coming.

Vinegar: They are now choking Andy Savana, and John Russo is just starting on in complete shock, frozen in bewilderment, and only when Brian Chartreuse calls for the bell, and Disqualifies John Russo does the Cross-Hemisphere Champion snap out of it, and he launches an attack on Johnny Blake, kicking him square in the back of the head....

Lieberjosch: Duncan Ryder sees the other end of the flag go slack, and colour run back into the face of Savana and realises his partner has been taken down by Russo, and he turns and gives him a low blow.

Vinegar: What is the meaning of this? Clearly they are not trying to aid Russo in anyway, but why go after Andy Savana in the first place?

Lieberjosch: It wouldn't be the first time they've used the main event to self promote...

Vinegar: But that was during the aftermath, they have ruined an entire title match, and are now standing waving the British Flag in the centre of the ring to a torrent of boos.

Lieberjosch: And both competitors are American, you think they could be making a point...

Vinegar: The point of the flag pole is slammed directly into Savana's skull by Johnny Blake as he attempts tog et to his feet, but Blake doesn't see Russo rising from behind and German Suplexing him tot he ground.

Lieberjosch: Duncan Ryder is on hand however to make amends and swings for a clothesline.

Vinegar: But Russo ducks, whips Ryder into the ropes and hits him with a Spear on the return.

Covert Jay: He looks pretty pissed they've ruined his first defence.

Lieberjosch: But that's not the most vivid feeling right now, pain is, as Blake has recovered and hit Russo with a Double Underhook DDT, slamming the Champion into the canvas with force, before turning to Savana and just kicking him in the head repeatedly.

Vinegar: Duncan Ryder gets to his feet once more, and picks up the flag and begins waving it once more, before breaking the pole over the back of John Russo as he gets to his knee's.

Lieberjosch: The Brigadier General has pulled Savana to his feet and hits an Urinagi Backbreaker, as Russo takes numerous shots to the ribs from Captain Ryder who is using the broken ends of the flagpole as weapons...

Vinegar: No Duncan moves off and joins Johnny with Savana...and he lifts him onto his shoulders...

Lieberjosch: THE HIT!

Covert Jay: Still needs a new redcoat name...

Vinegar: Russo and Savana have tried to fight back against these two, but the Royal 1st Battalions surprise ambush and their experience as a team has left the original competitors of this match brutalised, and it doesn't look like they're finished yet, as now they turn their attentions to John Russo....who leaps and takes them both down with a desperate double clothesline!

Lieberjosch: Those are the instincts of a champion...albeit a fairly dumb one, stay down and hope you can reserve some energy for a fight that matters.

Vinegar: Defending your countries honour is possibly the most important fight you can undetake.

Lieberjosch: Unless, of course your from the US, then it's always a losing battle.

Vinegar: Russo is proving otherwise right now as he alternates punches from one member of R1B to the other, keeping them grounded...

Lieberjosch: He should get out of their as soon as he can, he's tiring and Andy Savana is in no state to take over when he's run out of fight.

Vinegar: I don't think beating a retreat is in John Russo's playbook...

Lieberjosch: it should be as The Brigadier General takes advantage of the increasingly slower and weaker fists coming his way to roll out of the way, causing Russo to jar his arm into the canvas, giving the opportunity for the captain to roll onto his knee's, and then Blake just drops an elbow on the neck of John Russo, and once again the only men standing are The Royal 1st Battallion, you can be sure the Queen is glowing with pride right now...

Vinegar: and it looks like they have a plan, they look at one another and Johnny Blake points to both Savana and Russo and runs his thumb across his throat...OUT OF NOWHERE THE BRIGADIER GENERAL IS TURNED INSIDE OUT BY A THUNDEROUS RUNNING BIG BOOT!

Lieberjosch: Who the hell is that...

Vinegar: It's neither Savana or Russo that's for sure, but the newcomer is moving with such speed I haven't had a chance to catch his face...and the camera men are apaprently useless too...he turns though, and kicks a stunned Duncan Ryder in the midsection...DASHING DRIVER!...this stranger has just taken Captain Ryder out with his own finisher...but I still can't make him out...WAIT?...no, no...false alarm...the hair is all wrong...

Lieberjosch: Whomever it is, Johnny Blake is pissed and he stands and starts to run towards him...but the stranger turns and in turn runs towards Blake....

Vinegar: SIGNIFICANT IMPACT!!! IT CAN'T BE!

Covert Jay: How'd he escape the midgets?

Vinegar: IT IS!....IT IS!!!!DECLAN PRESCOTT HAS RETURNED!!!

Lieberjosch: Who?

Vinegar: GIW's first ever Global Champion, the companies owner right until the end, the original Heart and Soul of Global Impact Wrestling....the last time we saw him he was kidnapped by some angry asian midgets, but not everyone is perfect. This is astounding, he stands in the centre of the ring, and the crowd has erupted...he never received a reception like this in GIW! Andy Savana is on his knee's now and he has a smile from ear to ear...did he know?

Lieberjosch: So it's a big deal?

Vinegar: The ramifications are huge, it was only months ago he released his control and sold GIW, but it has been a lot longer since we have seen him in the ring, why is he back? And now he helps Savana to his feet, and also Russo who looks even more confused than he did when R1B initially interfered.

Covert Jay: Looks like he uses a lot less hair product these days.

Vinegar: Who knows what else has changed, it wasn't really in Declan's style to come to the aid of others, especially when the odds outnumbered him. This is a monumental night that will be felt in UGWC for a long time to come, The Significant Player has returned to the industry, some may say he has returned home, it's safe to say nothing will be quite the same again. We're running out of time, but make sure you join us again next week, where no doubt we will have Declan Prescott's first official match back.

Covert Jay: But what about the midgets?

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Credits

Chaos Title Match

T-Rob

Phrixus vs Enigma
Hastings

Ground Zero
JK & Hastings

Triple Threat Match
Tyvola

The Brigadier General has an idea
A-Kis

Hastings vs Medos
A-Kis[/b]

IYH Announcement
Hastings

Main Event
T-Rob[/b][/center]

[andysavana]

Looks like we'll have new tag champs in a monkeys year.

[Alex Kiseragi]

Woop. Good show. I always feel just a couple of little extra segments really adds alot to it. I might make an effort to devise more of them in future.

Aside from that it seems the only other thing to really mention is welcome back P. On that note, the one minor criticism I have is that I think the last match could have gone on a little. Somehow I think it may have actually made the big return scene bigger.

[Declan Prescott]

The next monkey's year is in 2016. That does not bode well. Unless you mean like a dog year, but with a monkey. But I have no fuckin' clue how long that is or if such a thing even exists

Yeah, I liked the show. Naturally I am biased, but I enjoyed my return. Liked how it was built up around R1B, then pulled a bait and switch move. And was very cool of Alex to do it.

I love the voting concept for the PPV and enjoyed all the matches, but don't really feel I'm up to speed enough yet to comment in too much detail. I shall rectify this atrocity over the coming weeks!

Glad to be back, people.