Post by T-Robosaurus Rex on Jul 10, 2010 18:56:28 GMT -5
[The scene opens and we instantly see the smarmy, smug and constantly smiling face of the Unified Global Wrestling Coalitions Sports Entertainment Executive, Dexter Vines. He is striding along the corridor, alongside one half of the UGWC Cooperative Champions, Travis Roberts.]
Dexter : Loving the new look by the way.
['The Headliner' has a finely tuned ass-kisser radar, and he merely raises his eyebrows over the top of his Aviator sunglasses. Dexter is taken back for a moment by the non response, and for a moment, albeit the briefest of milliseconds, the smile disppears from his face, before he recovers a smarms back.]
Dexter: The beard...or lack of. Makes you more appealing to the female demographic, the stubble works especially well, a little something for everybody...
['The Blessed One' stops dead in his tracks, Vines slows as well and turns with a curious, and sickening, smile. Travis lowers his sun glasses and looks directly at Dexter.]
Travis – 'Are you hitting on 'The TWiSTeD Icon'? 'The Blessed One' may be a Cooperative Champion, but that's not the kind of teamwork he specialises in.'
[Dexter looks to his side sheepishly, before quickly looking back and laughing]
Dexter: HaHaHaHa...No...No...of course not...Such wit you possess! Me!...hitting on another man? That's comedy gold my man...'
[Travis starts walking again, this time with a little more urgency it seems, as Dexter keeps pace.]
Dexter: Let's get to the point shall we? The Consortium are so glad you agreed to do this, between you and I we haven't quite picked up the numbers we would have liked. Whilst obviously the fan base is larger than either of the two entities that we amalgamated, it has been on a steady decline since No Holds Barred. Whilst we are currently planning a new look for the website, we feel we need to act more quickly.
Travis – 'Just as long as this isn't an overblown attempt to get Travis Roberts to agree to liven up the World Title scene. Donovan is doing a stellar job, but it seems the quality of his opposition is lacking, and quite obviously you guys are desperate.'
Dexter: I'm not sure I follow...
Travis – 'Bringing back Raenius from his self imposed inebriated hiatus, is pretty much the epitome of a booking team throwing a Hail Mary.'
Dexter: No...No....it wasn't like that at all. Raenius graciously accepted to drop the guarenteed shot at The Global Championship he won in GIW, in return for no compensation. This is merely an honest attempt to make amends.
Travis – 'Spin it anyway you want Dex, any living cell above an amoeba can see right through it.'
Dexter: That's all irrelevant anyway, this has nothing to do with the World Heavyweight Title scene, we didn't lie on the phone. The consortium has come to the conclusion that one of the reasons for the down turn in fans, is a lack of exposure in the mainstream, popular media. Obviously many networks refuse to cover us at all, out of spite of our self-sufficient business plan, but there are many other media outlets in this day and age, and UGWC Entertainment Professional's seem to be somewhat reticent to embrace it...
Travis – 'Not all of them, Declan Prescott appeared on 'The Piercing Truth' this week..
Dexter: Sorry, did I forget to mention we are targeting mainstream and popular media outlets.
Travis – 'Ah.'
Dexter: Anyway, it didn't take us long to realise that the person with the most experience of press conferences and journalists was yourself...
Travis – 'The fact it took you any time at all to come to that conclusion is something to worry about.'
[The two men reach a set of double doors with the words 'PRESS ROOM' on the sign, Tyravis goes to confidently walk in, but Dexter places his hand against the door...]
Dexter: Before you go in there...
[Travis chuckles]
Travis – 'Travis Roberts doesn't need a pep talk...'
[Travis brushes Dexter's hand away and swings the door open and walks inside the room, a few moments later he steps back out, closes the door, and removes his glasses fully, before pinching the bridge of his nose.]
Travis – ''The Blessed One' can only assume this is some kind of joke.'
Dexter: That's what I wanted to talk to you about...
Travis – ''The Most Influential Icon in Sports Entertainment this Millennia' is pretty sure he saw at least two of them actually licking windows...'
Dexter: As I said earlier, a number of major media outlets have blacklisted us, so we've had to explore more...'out of the box' thinking. We have some of the most read bloggers out there, also some of the leading online wrestling journalists, a couple of former pro's out there too...
Travis – ''The Headliner' can't get out of this can he?'
Dexter: Let's just say, if you don't go back in and answer their questions, they may just find themselves in possession of eD's address. And I'm pretty7 positive at least a handful of them are packing night vision goggles, lubricants and chloroform...
['The Headliner' realises he has no option whatsoever and places his sunglasses back on and strides into the room. The next shot we see is of 'The Blessed One' behind a podium bearing the UGWC Logo, his brow is furrowed, and he is leaning back as far as physically possible without becoming horizontal. We are apparently spared from the site that falls before his eyes, but the expression on his face suggests that's a very, very good thing. He doesn't even bother with a quick intro, he just points towards someone, and then a voice, that varies in pitch and tone throughout the questions speaks out]
'Mr Roberts, Mandy Albright, Wrestling Observer Online, the readers of our sitre would really like to know...'
[The voice is quickly interupted by the sound of soemone muttering to themselves]
'Why didn't he pick me? Meeeeeeeee!. Like a forest with no trees, his mind is lost, I once ate a bee, I'll get answers at any cost. Perhaps he cannot see me behind these hacks, it's clear I must go to front from back!'
[Travis' face suddenly freezes in shock, and he looks out into the crowd, but apparently cannot find what he is looking for and looks back towards the original questioner with a shrug]
Mandy Albright – 'As I was saying, the readers of the Wrestling Observer Online, would like to know what your thoughts are on your upcoming match? You've never teamed with Alex Kiseragi before, in fact the two of you have had quite a history, 'The Dragon' being the only man to have beaten you twice, in championship matches, at Pay-Per-Views, can you coexist given past hostilities?'
Travis – 'Only one of them was officially sanctioned Mandy, but your question in itself contains the answer. To have bested 'The Headliner' twice in your career is something very, very few men can claim, imagine what an athlete you must be to beat him for the Global Championship, and on two occasions no less? 'The Blessed One' is a logical individual Mandy, what possible problems could 'The TWiSTeD Icon' have with this partnership.'
'Fairies and queens, virgins and beans, these are a few of my favouritist things...'
Mandy – 'Follow up question. How can you even feign respect for a man you have gone of record as comparing unfavourably to a turn-buckle in terms of entertainment?'
[Travis chuckles to himself...]
Travis – 'Yeah, that was a good one wasn't it? But you miss the point, this isn't about entertainment, it's about getting the job done in the match, and 'The Dragon' is a master when he gets himself in a ring, not many people are able to fight him off. 'The Blessed One' can honestly say he has seen very few people with Alex Kiseragi's command of the ring. Travis Roberts doesn't need a stand up show before he teams with an individual.'
'Dylan James, from The Killswitch Reanimation League...'
Travis – 'Aren't you meant to be a rodent, or dead? Travis Roberts loses track...'
Dylan James – 'How do you feel about being separated from your partner Tyvola this week? I was once separated from my mummy, and when I came back I found a baboon had tied her up, and he proceeded to overpower me, and then he took her innocence right there in front of me...'
Travis – 'That probably explains a lot, but this isn't a self help group...'The Blessed One' doesn't do any meeting that ends with a round of applause after every speaker. But as for the original question, 'The Headliner' has no issue with Tyvola having his own match this week, one of the things that makes any true partnership a healthy one is space, 'The Bearded Bastard' has been on a steep learning curve, and this week he just needs to blow of some steam against a irrelevant curtain jerker, it's one bit of booking 'The Blessed One' can applaud. When domesticating any animal, you need to allow them to go wild, in controlled circumstances, and with something you have little affection for.'
Mandy – 'Space? Is that why you and Donovan have barely spent any time together in the past few months? Because the rumours are there are problems in the TWiSTeD camp, what with the two of you pulling in very different directions.'
Travis – ''The Blessed One' rejects the premise, he and The UGWC World Heavyweight Champion spend as much time together as our schedules permit, but we are not a married couple, so it's not a priority. 'The Lord Chief' has had to concentrate on defending his title, and 'The Blessed One' found himself his own project, turning Tyvola into a finely tuned weapon. Currently we have our own focus', it's nothing more than that, whilst Donovan Hastings has busied himself valiantly fighting off the likes of Red Fusion and Medos, 'The Blessed One' has been moulding a future World Champion.'
'Randall Baker, Backslash Wrestling. This week will be your first meeting with Travis Pierce, a man who has been very public in referring to you as the number two Travis in the company. What are your thoughts on this?'
Travis – ''The Blessed One' must concede that Travis Pierce may have a point. In the Unified Global Wrestling Coalition he may well have achieved more than 'The Headliner', it is true that 'The Longest Reigning Global Champion in GIW's History' has not managed to become a valiant runner up in the Cross-Hemisphere Championship Unification match to 'The Dragon', nor did 'The Three Time Global Impact Wrestling Global Champion' manage to almost reach the peak of the metaphorical mountain that was The Alex Kiseragi invitational tournament. In his time in UGWC 'GIW's Most Successful PPV Performer' has merely been defending some meaningless trinket.'
'Ven ist Jack Ryans making heez return? It iz Savage by zee vay!'
Travis – 'Next question'
Savage – 'But I have zeee oil, and zee duct tape!'
'Taking out the opposition, making little friction, journo's die, bloggers fly, the night will soon be mine, Oh MINE!'
Travis – 'Next question!'
'Hey it's Sierra, I was wondering how you are feeling about facing John Russo for the first time? He has teamed with Pierce before, they were LWF Tag Team Champions, and he beat your partner for the night at Revolution to claim the Cross Hemisphere Championship, a title he held before in LWF. Surely his presence in the match concerns you?'
Travis – 'You clearly don't know Travis Roberts too well, but you've obviously done your research on Russo. The way 'The Blessed One' figures it is this, Travis Pierce cannot beat Alex Kiseragi, the inferiority complex is clear, and John only just got the win at Revolution. So if you dd 'The Headliner' to the equation, there is more than enough skill and experience alongside 'The Dragon' to ensure the night goes smoothly. Despite John's previous experience with Pierce, 'The TWiSTeD Guerrilla' does have to wonder if he has any chance of keeping that egomaniac's focus off of Alex Kiseragi, his chosen nemesis, and also stop him doing something stupid in an attempt to prove he is the superior Travis, he could have a nasty accident doing that. Honestly, Russo seems to have more to be concerned with than Travis Roberts'
'Cat's scream for the moon, when I find my spoon, pancakes with syphilis, completely delichylish!'
Travis – ''The Blessed One' hopes that's not who he thinks it is, but is becoming increasingly concerned that he knows the identity of our rambling friend. Those in the press pool would be well advised to avoid the source of the voice...and the inevitable smell of fish...'
'What kind of fish...like tunAAAARrrrrrrgggh'
[The random enquiry goes from scream to a muffled murmur before stopping. Travis shakes his head, as the crowd begin to shuffle, some even dart out of the room as we hear the doors swing and slam on a couple of occasions]
Travis – 'You guy's might not have long left...'
Randall - 'I have another question, the readers of Backslash would like to know what the recent return of Declan Prescott means to you? Are you excited about the return of your former partner, or are you worried as he seems to have joined Andy Savana in targeting you? And how have Declan's numerous disappearances affected your relationship?'
Travis – 'The return of the man once known as 'The Heart and Soul of GIW' cannot be perceived as anything less than a monumental day for the industry, it ranks up their with Travis Roberts' own return over two years ago, it has the potential to have the same sort of impact. Declan Prescott is a fine man, a fine athlete and the Unified Global Wrestling Coalition are lucky he has chosen to return with this company, it is a major coup.
'The Blessed One' has heard the rumours that Andy Savana and Declan Prescott have their sights set on Travis Roberts and in turn Tyvola, and this does not surprise 'The TWiSTeD Icon' in the least. Declan Prescott has always been a honourable warrior, he never seeks to gain respect the easy way, he has always relished a true challenge. 'The Significant Player', as he was once known, is smart enough to know that a match-up with 'The Most influential Icon in Sports Entertainment this Millennia' will not only gain more exposure to his return, but also he gets the chance to teast himself against the very best.
As for our relationship, 'The Blessed One' can only speak for himself and say that nothing has changed, the bond between the Revolution was never a temporary one, and true brothers are always supportive of one another, even in their darkest moments.'
Mandy – 'Does that mean we can expect to see 'The Revolution' reform in the future?'
Travis – ''The Headliner' is never one to give definitive answers, all he can say is that the goals of The Revolution were accomplished, even in Declan's absence. The Revolution was created with the single aim of turning the Global Heavyweight Championship from a joke into something prestigious, and in turn put GIW on top of the industry. There is no reason for The Revolution to reunite, but that does not mean the bond between us has diminished...'
Randall – 'Did you see Declan on The Piercing Truth.'
Travis – 'It was the first time in a while 'The Blessed One' managed to watch an entire episode without the impulse to throw himself into a jet engine. As ever Declan showed to everyone why he is a true star, he is almost as comfortable as 'The TWiSTeD icon' in front of a camera.'
Randall – 'Some observers suggest, that if you actually read between the lines, when Prescott stated that you always align yourself with the best, he was actually insinuating that you are carried by the merit's of your partners?'
Travis – 'Those observers obviously have the intellectual capacity of pistachio nuts, thankfully this does not apply to Declan Prescott. 'The Darkest Light' knows all too well that Travis Roberts has an eye for talent, and only aligns himself with those that compliment his own merits. Anyone suggesting that 'The Blessed One' has been carried by any of his partners may wish to look into the facts, he had a far more successful period before he and Donovan formed a TWiSTeD pact, and as for Tyvola, before 'The Headliners' intervention the only thing he could have carried 'The TWiSTeD Guerilla' to was a trash can to forage from.'
[Their is another muffled scream, and the sound of more departing bodies.]
'Like the red sea and Moses, my efforts make them part, pygmies fight for roses, move closer to the heart'
Travis – 'Right, there is only time for one last question...'
Mandy – 'Despite all your posturing, are you at all worried that Declan Prescott harbours any ill will towards you, and that he plots to screw you as he has so many others?'
[Travis he starts walking a slowly backwards towards the door]
Travis – 'What possible reason does he have to be angered at 'The Blessed One'? Travis Roberts did not give him the bottle, 'The Headliner' has no concerns at all, he and Declan Prescott will always have a bond.'
[As he finishes Travis fumbles with the door knob, a look of desperation across his face, like his worst nightmare has come true. He finally manages to open the door and quickly enters the room...]
Mandy – 'Where are you goi...WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE HOLY MOTHER IS THAT!'[/i]
'Are they dead?'
'You wanna wait and find out?'
[It all falls silent, and we remain focused on the empty podium, before suddenly a vision from the depths of many a child and adults nightmares engulfs the screen. The face of a maniacal, slobbering, frenzied clown fills glares into the camera, the eyes bloodshot, his wig matted and decaying. He frowns, and then a snarl crosses his face. This is no ordinary creepy clown, this is a man old school GIW fans will wish they hadn't been reminded of, he was GIW's resident clown prince, the (allegedly) paedophile clown, Joka. He tilts his head from side to side as he looks right down the camera. And then he speaks in his perverse sing song tone.]
Joka – 'Alas is my day, the sky should turn grey, it was my deepest desire, to just simply inquire, if he would be my roomate!'
[As he finishes, he snarls once again, as if reacting to your own reaction to his 'poetry'. He then grabs the camera and hurls into the door Travis exited out of. And as soon as the static hits we see Travis outside with Dexter Vines, who looks perplexed having not witnessed the scenes inside.]
Travis – 'What were you thinking, credentialing him? You need to get a team in there quick, or you might find a quarter of the press pool to be carrying unwanted children. And you're going to need an army of therapists, the fallen are going to feel violated...at best.'
[Dexter quickly reaches down for his phone, just as the blessed one's own cell rings. 'The Headliner' looks at the caller id, and answers the phone speaking before the caller has a chance to speak.]
Travis – 'eD, remind 'The Blessed One' to arrange his own press appearances in the future..What?...Calm down, you're babbling like Phrixus Deimos right now, you'd need to be a cryptologist to understand...What do you mean...It was only a trip to the dentist...a morbid phobia of dental floss?...So you're calling to tell 'The TWiSTeD High Commander' that you've lost him again...again.'
[Travis removes his aviators and uses his free hand to pinch the bridge of his nose once more, he then turns to the wall and hits his head, softly but repeatedly against it as the scene fades out for the final time.]
Dexter : Loving the new look by the way.
['The Headliner' has a finely tuned ass-kisser radar, and he merely raises his eyebrows over the top of his Aviator sunglasses. Dexter is taken back for a moment by the non response, and for a moment, albeit the briefest of milliseconds, the smile disppears from his face, before he recovers a smarms back.]
Dexter: The beard...or lack of. Makes you more appealing to the female demographic, the stubble works especially well, a little something for everybody...
['The Blessed One' stops dead in his tracks, Vines slows as well and turns with a curious, and sickening, smile. Travis lowers his sun glasses and looks directly at Dexter.]
Travis – 'Are you hitting on 'The TWiSTeD Icon'? 'The Blessed One' may be a Cooperative Champion, but that's not the kind of teamwork he specialises in.'
[Dexter looks to his side sheepishly, before quickly looking back and laughing]
Dexter: HaHaHaHa...No...No...of course not...Such wit you possess! Me!...hitting on another man? That's comedy gold my man...'
[Travis starts walking again, this time with a little more urgency it seems, as Dexter keeps pace.]
Dexter: Let's get to the point shall we? The Consortium are so glad you agreed to do this, between you and I we haven't quite picked up the numbers we would have liked. Whilst obviously the fan base is larger than either of the two entities that we amalgamated, it has been on a steady decline since No Holds Barred. Whilst we are currently planning a new look for the website, we feel we need to act more quickly.
Travis – 'Just as long as this isn't an overblown attempt to get Travis Roberts to agree to liven up the World Title scene. Donovan is doing a stellar job, but it seems the quality of his opposition is lacking, and quite obviously you guys are desperate.'
Dexter: I'm not sure I follow...
Travis – 'Bringing back Raenius from his self imposed inebriated hiatus, is pretty much the epitome of a booking team throwing a Hail Mary.'
Dexter: No...No....it wasn't like that at all. Raenius graciously accepted to drop the guarenteed shot at The Global Championship he won in GIW, in return for no compensation. This is merely an honest attempt to make amends.
Travis – 'Spin it anyway you want Dex, any living cell above an amoeba can see right through it.'
Dexter: That's all irrelevant anyway, this has nothing to do with the World Heavyweight Title scene, we didn't lie on the phone. The consortium has come to the conclusion that one of the reasons for the down turn in fans, is a lack of exposure in the mainstream, popular media. Obviously many networks refuse to cover us at all, out of spite of our self-sufficient business plan, but there are many other media outlets in this day and age, and UGWC Entertainment Professional's seem to be somewhat reticent to embrace it...
Travis – 'Not all of them, Declan Prescott appeared on 'The Piercing Truth' this week..
Dexter: Sorry, did I forget to mention we are targeting mainstream and popular media outlets.
Travis – 'Ah.'
Dexter: Anyway, it didn't take us long to realise that the person with the most experience of press conferences and journalists was yourself...
Travis – 'The fact it took you any time at all to come to that conclusion is something to worry about.'
[The two men reach a set of double doors with the words 'PRESS ROOM' on the sign, Tyravis goes to confidently walk in, but Dexter places his hand against the door...]
Dexter: Before you go in there...
[Travis chuckles]
Travis – 'Travis Roberts doesn't need a pep talk...'
[Travis brushes Dexter's hand away and swings the door open and walks inside the room, a few moments later he steps back out, closes the door, and removes his glasses fully, before pinching the bridge of his nose.]
Travis – ''The Blessed One' can only assume this is some kind of joke.'
Dexter: That's what I wanted to talk to you about...
Travis – ''The Most Influential Icon in Sports Entertainment this Millennia' is pretty sure he saw at least two of them actually licking windows...'
Dexter: As I said earlier, a number of major media outlets have blacklisted us, so we've had to explore more...'out of the box' thinking. We have some of the most read bloggers out there, also some of the leading online wrestling journalists, a couple of former pro's out there too...
Travis – ''The Headliner' can't get out of this can he?'
Dexter: Let's just say, if you don't go back in and answer their questions, they may just find themselves in possession of eD's address. And I'm pretty7 positive at least a handful of them are packing night vision goggles, lubricants and chloroform...
['The Headliner' realises he has no option whatsoever and places his sunglasses back on and strides into the room. The next shot we see is of 'The Blessed One' behind a podium bearing the UGWC Logo, his brow is furrowed, and he is leaning back as far as physically possible without becoming horizontal. We are apparently spared from the site that falls before his eyes, but the expression on his face suggests that's a very, very good thing. He doesn't even bother with a quick intro, he just points towards someone, and then a voice, that varies in pitch and tone throughout the questions speaks out]
'Mr Roberts, Mandy Albright, Wrestling Observer Online, the readers of our sitre would really like to know...'
[The voice is quickly interupted by the sound of soemone muttering to themselves]
'Why didn't he pick me? Meeeeeeeee!. Like a forest with no trees, his mind is lost, I once ate a bee, I'll get answers at any cost. Perhaps he cannot see me behind these hacks, it's clear I must go to front from back!'
[Travis' face suddenly freezes in shock, and he looks out into the crowd, but apparently cannot find what he is looking for and looks back towards the original questioner with a shrug]
Mandy Albright – 'As I was saying, the readers of the Wrestling Observer Online, would like to know what your thoughts are on your upcoming match? You've never teamed with Alex Kiseragi before, in fact the two of you have had quite a history, 'The Dragon' being the only man to have beaten you twice, in championship matches, at Pay-Per-Views, can you coexist given past hostilities?'
Travis – 'Only one of them was officially sanctioned Mandy, but your question in itself contains the answer. To have bested 'The Headliner' twice in your career is something very, very few men can claim, imagine what an athlete you must be to beat him for the Global Championship, and on two occasions no less? 'The Blessed One' is a logical individual Mandy, what possible problems could 'The TWiSTeD Icon' have with this partnership.'
'Fairies and queens, virgins and beans, these are a few of my favouritist things...'
Mandy – 'Follow up question. How can you even feign respect for a man you have gone of record as comparing unfavourably to a turn-buckle in terms of entertainment?'
[Travis chuckles to himself...]
Travis – 'Yeah, that was a good one wasn't it? But you miss the point, this isn't about entertainment, it's about getting the job done in the match, and 'The Dragon' is a master when he gets himself in a ring, not many people are able to fight him off. 'The Blessed One' can honestly say he has seen very few people with Alex Kiseragi's command of the ring. Travis Roberts doesn't need a stand up show before he teams with an individual.'
'Dylan James, from The Killswitch Reanimation League...'
Travis – 'Aren't you meant to be a rodent, or dead? Travis Roberts loses track...'
Dylan James – 'How do you feel about being separated from your partner Tyvola this week? I was once separated from my mummy, and when I came back I found a baboon had tied her up, and he proceeded to overpower me, and then he took her innocence right there in front of me...'
Travis – 'That probably explains a lot, but this isn't a self help group...'The Blessed One' doesn't do any meeting that ends with a round of applause after every speaker. But as for the original question, 'The Headliner' has no issue with Tyvola having his own match this week, one of the things that makes any true partnership a healthy one is space, 'The Bearded Bastard' has been on a steep learning curve, and this week he just needs to blow of some steam against a irrelevant curtain jerker, it's one bit of booking 'The Blessed One' can applaud. When domesticating any animal, you need to allow them to go wild, in controlled circumstances, and with something you have little affection for.'
Mandy – 'Space? Is that why you and Donovan have barely spent any time together in the past few months? Because the rumours are there are problems in the TWiSTeD camp, what with the two of you pulling in very different directions.'
Travis – ''The Blessed One' rejects the premise, he and The UGWC World Heavyweight Champion spend as much time together as our schedules permit, but we are not a married couple, so it's not a priority. 'The Lord Chief' has had to concentrate on defending his title, and 'The Blessed One' found himself his own project, turning Tyvola into a finely tuned weapon. Currently we have our own focus', it's nothing more than that, whilst Donovan Hastings has busied himself valiantly fighting off the likes of Red Fusion and Medos, 'The Blessed One' has been moulding a future World Champion.'
'Randall Baker, Backslash Wrestling. This week will be your first meeting with Travis Pierce, a man who has been very public in referring to you as the number two Travis in the company. What are your thoughts on this?'
Travis – ''The Blessed One' must concede that Travis Pierce may have a point. In the Unified Global Wrestling Coalition he may well have achieved more than 'The Headliner', it is true that 'The Longest Reigning Global Champion in GIW's History' has not managed to become a valiant runner up in the Cross-Hemisphere Championship Unification match to 'The Dragon', nor did 'The Three Time Global Impact Wrestling Global Champion' manage to almost reach the peak of the metaphorical mountain that was The Alex Kiseragi invitational tournament. In his time in UGWC 'GIW's Most Successful PPV Performer' has merely been defending some meaningless trinket.'
'Ven ist Jack Ryans making heez return? It iz Savage by zee vay!'
Travis – 'Next question'
Savage – 'But I have zeee oil, and zee duct tape!'
'Taking out the opposition, making little friction, journo's die, bloggers fly, the night will soon be mine, Oh MINE!'
Travis – 'Next question!'
'Hey it's Sierra, I was wondering how you are feeling about facing John Russo for the first time? He has teamed with Pierce before, they were LWF Tag Team Champions, and he beat your partner for the night at Revolution to claim the Cross Hemisphere Championship, a title he held before in LWF. Surely his presence in the match concerns you?'
Travis – 'You clearly don't know Travis Roberts too well, but you've obviously done your research on Russo. The way 'The Blessed One' figures it is this, Travis Pierce cannot beat Alex Kiseragi, the inferiority complex is clear, and John only just got the win at Revolution. So if you dd 'The Headliner' to the equation, there is more than enough skill and experience alongside 'The Dragon' to ensure the night goes smoothly. Despite John's previous experience with Pierce, 'The TWiSTeD Guerrilla' does have to wonder if he has any chance of keeping that egomaniac's focus off of Alex Kiseragi, his chosen nemesis, and also stop him doing something stupid in an attempt to prove he is the superior Travis, he could have a nasty accident doing that. Honestly, Russo seems to have more to be concerned with than Travis Roberts'
'Cat's scream for the moon, when I find my spoon, pancakes with syphilis, completely delichylish!'
Travis – ''The Blessed One' hopes that's not who he thinks it is, but is becoming increasingly concerned that he knows the identity of our rambling friend. Those in the press pool would be well advised to avoid the source of the voice...and the inevitable smell of fish...'
'What kind of fish...like tunAAAARrrrrrrgggh'
[The random enquiry goes from scream to a muffled murmur before stopping. Travis shakes his head, as the crowd begin to shuffle, some even dart out of the room as we hear the doors swing and slam on a couple of occasions]
Travis – 'You guy's might not have long left...'
Randall - 'I have another question, the readers of Backslash would like to know what the recent return of Declan Prescott means to you? Are you excited about the return of your former partner, or are you worried as he seems to have joined Andy Savana in targeting you? And how have Declan's numerous disappearances affected your relationship?'
Travis – 'The return of the man once known as 'The Heart and Soul of GIW' cannot be perceived as anything less than a monumental day for the industry, it ranks up their with Travis Roberts' own return over two years ago, it has the potential to have the same sort of impact. Declan Prescott is a fine man, a fine athlete and the Unified Global Wrestling Coalition are lucky he has chosen to return with this company, it is a major coup.
'The Blessed One' has heard the rumours that Andy Savana and Declan Prescott have their sights set on Travis Roberts and in turn Tyvola, and this does not surprise 'The TWiSTeD Icon' in the least. Declan Prescott has always been a honourable warrior, he never seeks to gain respect the easy way, he has always relished a true challenge. 'The Significant Player', as he was once known, is smart enough to know that a match-up with 'The Most influential Icon in Sports Entertainment this Millennia' will not only gain more exposure to his return, but also he gets the chance to teast himself against the very best.
As for our relationship, 'The Blessed One' can only speak for himself and say that nothing has changed, the bond between the Revolution was never a temporary one, and true brothers are always supportive of one another, even in their darkest moments.'
Mandy – 'Does that mean we can expect to see 'The Revolution' reform in the future?'
Travis – ''The Headliner' is never one to give definitive answers, all he can say is that the goals of The Revolution were accomplished, even in Declan's absence. The Revolution was created with the single aim of turning the Global Heavyweight Championship from a joke into something prestigious, and in turn put GIW on top of the industry. There is no reason for The Revolution to reunite, but that does not mean the bond between us has diminished...'
Randall – 'Did you see Declan on The Piercing Truth.'
Travis – 'It was the first time in a while 'The Blessed One' managed to watch an entire episode without the impulse to throw himself into a jet engine. As ever Declan showed to everyone why he is a true star, he is almost as comfortable as 'The TWiSTeD icon' in front of a camera.'
Randall – 'Some observers suggest, that if you actually read between the lines, when Prescott stated that you always align yourself with the best, he was actually insinuating that you are carried by the merit's of your partners?'
Travis – 'Those observers obviously have the intellectual capacity of pistachio nuts, thankfully this does not apply to Declan Prescott. 'The Darkest Light' knows all too well that Travis Roberts has an eye for talent, and only aligns himself with those that compliment his own merits. Anyone suggesting that 'The Blessed One' has been carried by any of his partners may wish to look into the facts, he had a far more successful period before he and Donovan formed a TWiSTeD pact, and as for Tyvola, before 'The Headliners' intervention the only thing he could have carried 'The TWiSTeD Guerilla' to was a trash can to forage from.'
[Their is another muffled scream, and the sound of more departing bodies.]
'Like the red sea and Moses, my efforts make them part, pygmies fight for roses, move closer to the heart'
Travis – 'Right, there is only time for one last question...'
Mandy – 'Despite all your posturing, are you at all worried that Declan Prescott harbours any ill will towards you, and that he plots to screw you as he has so many others?'
[Travis he starts walking a slowly backwards towards the door]
Travis – 'What possible reason does he have to be angered at 'The Blessed One'? Travis Roberts did not give him the bottle, 'The Headliner' has no concerns at all, he and Declan Prescott will always have a bond.'
[As he finishes Travis fumbles with the door knob, a look of desperation across his face, like his worst nightmare has come true. He finally manages to open the door and quickly enters the room...]
Mandy – 'Where are you goi...WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE HOLY MOTHER IS THAT!'[/i]
'Are they dead?'
'You wanna wait and find out?'
[It all falls silent, and we remain focused on the empty podium, before suddenly a vision from the depths of many a child and adults nightmares engulfs the screen. The face of a maniacal, slobbering, frenzied clown fills glares into the camera, the eyes bloodshot, his wig matted and decaying. He frowns, and then a snarl crosses his face. This is no ordinary creepy clown, this is a man old school GIW fans will wish they hadn't been reminded of, he was GIW's resident clown prince, the (allegedly) paedophile clown, Joka. He tilts his head from side to side as he looks right down the camera. And then he speaks in his perverse sing song tone.]
Joka – 'Alas is my day, the sky should turn grey, it was my deepest desire, to just simply inquire, if he would be my roomate!'
[As he finishes, he snarls once again, as if reacting to your own reaction to his 'poetry'. He then grabs the camera and hurls into the door Travis exited out of. And as soon as the static hits we see Travis outside with Dexter Vines, who looks perplexed having not witnessed the scenes inside.]
Travis – 'What were you thinking, credentialing him? You need to get a team in there quick, or you might find a quarter of the press pool to be carrying unwanted children. And you're going to need an army of therapists, the fallen are going to feel violated...at best.'
[Dexter quickly reaches down for his phone, just as the blessed one's own cell rings. 'The Headliner' looks at the caller id, and answers the phone speaking before the caller has a chance to speak.]
Travis – 'eD, remind 'The Blessed One' to arrange his own press appearances in the future..What?...Calm down, you're babbling like Phrixus Deimos right now, you'd need to be a cryptologist to understand...What do you mean...It was only a trip to the dentist...a morbid phobia of dental floss?...So you're calling to tell 'The TWiSTeD High Commander' that you've lost him again...again.'
[Travis removes his aviators and uses his free hand to pinch the bridge of his nose once more, he then turns to the wall and hits his head, softly but repeatedly against it as the scene fades out for the final time.]
x2