Post by T-Robosaurus Rex on Jul 22, 2009 18:38:17 GMT -5
[The scene opens and we see the familiar figure of eD cASe, Travis Roberts’ agent, walking briskly up the drive to ‘The Blessed One’s’ abode. Bear in mind the drive is close to a mile long, and eD only has ickle legs, so this could take some time. He has a look of determination on his face when his phone rings and he fumbles inside his miniature suit and brings out his cell]
eD – ‘eD cASe, Agent to ‘The Most Influential Icon in Sports Entertainment this Millenia’...*pauses for reply*...No! Not Alex Kiseragi! Who and what has he ever influenced? Apart from a few kids coming out of the closet, all very admirable and such....*listens*...Yes I represent Mr Travis Roberts...’
[eD continues his march up the hill, listening intently to the person on the other end of the phone]
eD – ‘And where are you calling from?...Powerslam Magazine?...And you’d like an interview? Well I’m not sure whether we can fit you into ‘The Blessed Ones’ very busy schedule...I’m sure I can give you a quote, what would you like to know?’
[eD stops in his tracks when he hears the question, and almost starts trembling with rage, but he calmly responds to the reporter]
eD – ‘Let me just make sure I got all that, ‘Is Travis Roberts now considered the industry’s biggest joke? He seems to have been in hiding since his defeat at Distant Whispers, his only on camera appearance since was a brief return at Sentinel, even then he walked away from the ring, as if he knew he was humiliating himself? Is he worthy of being included in the PPv Horizons, let alone the main event?’...Yeah, word for word, I have a good memory...*listens*...’How long till you can get a response from Travis?’, well I think I can safely say ‘The Headliner’ won’t have anything to say over such ridiculous claims, he won’t lower himself to the level of gutter trash journalism...’
[eD once again listens to the reporter on the other side of the phone, and then erupts]
eD – ‘Travis Roberts may not give you a quote, you smarmy little piece of shit, but the eDman certainly will. You wanna know why ‘The Headliner’ is keeping away from the camera’s? You think this ‘media blackout’ from ‘The Blessed One’ is an acceptance that he is not good enough? What planet are you living on? For the past six months, week in, week out, Travis Roberts has busted his ass for Global Impact Wrestling. He has done more interviews, had more camera time promoting the company to new audiences, dedicated himself to entertaining more influential members of the entertainment industry, than any of GIW’s other Global Heavyweight or Hardcore Champions in his time here.
It’s not a fucking coincidence that since Travis Roberts’ arrival in GIW the company has gone from a medium sized national promotion to worldwide phenomenon? What else would you attribute that growth to? Randy Boolzian’s fear of the public seeing a glimpse of the real him? Komosubes incoherent rantings and ravings? Lord Deathmans cheap kids party tricks? No, no, you are absolutely right it has had nothing to do with the charm, genius and technical ability of ‘The Blessed One’, Global Impact Wrestling’s sudden growth has been all down to Mr Personality himself, our current Global Heavyweight Champion, Mr Alex Kiseragi, the only man on the planet that can make a turnbuckle seem charismatic!
You want to start printing some juicy gossip about my client to boost your lousy dirt sheets circulation, your not gonna get that crap from eD cASe. See I know what all this is about, it’s the same reason GIW will be clamouring at ‘The Headliner’ to get back in front of the camera quick sharp. Sure Travis Roberts lost the title at Distant Whispers, but he didn’t stop being ‘The Headliner’. Sure Alex Kiseragi holds a strap of leather with some gold glued to it, but it doesn’t make him ‘Blessed’. It’s only taken a week and it’s already obvious to all that can see, this Industry needsTravis Roberts more than he needs them. It’s the road to Horizons, and the viewers and the wrestling enthusiasts demand more than ‘The Dragons’ heat sucking ‘Thank You Daddy Dearest’ speeches to keep them interested. They expect more than Randy Boolzian telling them all what they knew he’d say anyway. Even Randy knew this, that’s why he took up eD cASe’s offer. Sure the degenerate is lacking in a few basic human abilities, but even he could see that Randy Boolzian vs Alex Kiseragi was a disaster of a Main Event waiting to happen...the fans needed a Headliner in there, and they got it.
So maybe the question shouldn’t be is Travis Roberts’ the industry’s biggest joke? It should be is the Industry just one big joke to Travis Roberts right now?...*listens*...I’m not Declan Prescott’s agent, anything you wanna know about his thoughts and motivations you better get his office on the line...’
[With that eD ends the call and slips the phone back into his inside breast pocket, and continues walking towards the house, which is quite close now. As he approaches his phone rings once again, he looks at the caller ID, frowns and stops his approach to the house a few feet away. He turns his abck and takes the call...]
eD – ‘Yeah, I really wish you wouldn’t call me....Yeah....Look I don’t really wanna know, I wish you had never gotten me involved...Of course I remember, that’s why I’m doing this right?...yeah, I just saw him, he doesn’t have a clue...look I have to see Travis now....god I don’t know how I can even look him in the eyes...’
[With this eD cends the call and heads inside. We are then transported into the main hall of Travis’ mansion. He is spread out on a large leather sofa, a DVD on pause, a phone clutched to his ear and a burning roll up in his other hand]
Travis – ‘Look, I’m failing to see what is so incomprehensible about my request...you are Burger King right?...*takes a toke of his roll up whilst listening to the reply*...Good, and isn’t one of your motto’s ‘Have it your way’?...*takes another toke*...Great. Well listen to me quite simply kid, My[/b] way is two flame grilled, Extra Large Double Cheesburgers, with two extra large portions of chips, all tucked onto the back of some motorcycle, with your spotty, uneducated ass riding it to my door!...*Takes another toke*...Try Pizza Hut bitch!?!?!?’[/color]
[Travis takes the receiver from his ear and stares in stunned silence at the phone. eD breaks this moment by waddling through the double doors, Travis turns to look at his only friend, who greets him with a smile]
eD – ‘How’s it going Big Guy!’
Travis – ‘Well I just got owned by some punk who works at Burger King, apart from that relative humiliation, things are average...oh, and never call me ‘Big Guy’ ever again...’
eD – ‘Noted...but hey dude, you should be used to humiliation by now...you did lose to the guy with the Dragon Fetish.’
[Travis doesn’t reply, just simply stares at eD and takes a toke from the smoke once more. eD looks a little panicked, but continues calmy]
eD – ‘Too soon?’
Travis – ‘Let’s just say it was lucky I took the precaution of learning to roll up a smoke with one hand many years ago, because you are in no place to be making jokes Little Dude...’
eD – ‘Oh come one dude! You know I don’t think like that. I know you got that guys number, just gotta hope he doesn’t have yours...right? Right? You hear what I’m saying? You don’t want any deep breathing phone calls late at night...yeah?’
[Travis just stares at eD blankly, takes another toke, blows the smoke directly in eD’s direction and speaks]
Travis – ‘Gay jokes are well below you...Whether I can beat Kiseragi though, remains to be seen. But regardless, you are in no position to be making jokes, I’m still not happy with you for Saturday’s little display...’
eD – ‘It’s done now, anyway it was for your own good...’
Travis – ‘In the name of all that is TWiSTeD, you must really hate me! Was I really that wrong to get you out of ‘The Street’ give you a life away from all your mistakes? I thought I was helping you, when apparently you despise me...’
eD – ‘No man, Dude you know I’m grateful, seriously...’
Travis – ‘Then why do you want me to humiliate myself all over again, but not just a regular humiliation, a humiliation in front of the entire world, at GIW’s biggest PPV? I couldn’t beat Alex Kiseragi and Brandon Brown, what makes you think I’m gonna do any better against Kiseragi, Boolzian and Declan?’
eD – ‘Your being delusional, you only just missed out a Distant Whispers, you’ve had a lot on your plate...you’ll be back to normal come Horizons?’
Travis – ‘Right, of course I’ll be back to my best soon...how soon exactly eD? Will it be before or after I have to take a beating from my best friend? ‘Cause thanks to you, not only do I have to face him at Horizons, but now I have to face him this weekend. Hell I’m not surprised he booked this match this week, he’ll get to show the world exactly how much Travis Roberts relied on him.’
eD – ‘You know that’s crap as well as I do. Christ your starting to sound like all those damn conspiracy theorists. Declan may be all about himself, but he knows how talented you are. He didn’t put himself in the Horizons match to humiliate you, it’s because he want’s to ensure neither Kiseragi nor BoolZ plunge this company into the depths of hell before 2009. And I spoke to him earlier, he didn’t even book this week’s card, I don’t think he really wants to face you at all...’
Travis – ‘You did what? Why the hell are you bothering Declan? Does he think that I sent you? That’s even worse than needing your Daddy to beat up your enemies! What in the name of TWiSTeD were you thinking?’
eD – ‘I just wanted to know why he was being such an ass that’s all. And I found out you didn’t even tell him about the divorce...so I did.’
Travis – ‘You really are a wretched excuse for an organism aren’t you? You really are as stupid as you look. The divorce is a non issue, that whore was dead to ‘The Headliner’ when he opened his eyes to see only your freakish face looking back at ‘The Blessed One’. What good can come from highlighting the fact that Travis Roberts is an awful judge of character? Declan would never make such a stupid error, he and Cara are made for one another, almost as if it were their destiny, neither would wish harm on the other. Whereas ‘The TWiSTeD Icon’ managed to choose, for his bride, the only women who has been scientifically proven to be able to suck blood from a stone. All you’ve managed to do is give ‘The Heart and Soul of Global Impact Wrestling’ another reason to distance himself from the mess that is Travis Roberts. Great work, I’m glad I pay you all that money to look out for my best interests...’
eD – ‘You know, if Declan is even a quarter of the man you give him credit for being, he’ll see, just as I do, that this Mary-Joanna shit is what’s behind all this crap. He’ll recognise you could channel this to your advantage given the right support. Look I’m sorry I put the belt up at Horizons, I know how many memories that must have brought back...’
Travis – ‘I couldn’t care less about that belt, hell I almost put it on E-Bay a couple of times back in the day but I could never find the damn thing. It’s worthless, just like that ex-wife of mine. The only thing that matters is I’m just not good enough to be in that match, and believe me Declan is smart enough to see beyond this Mary-Jo smokescreen you have created. If I was half the man I claimed to be, I would have got the job done, I would have had a plan B, but I relied upon Declan Prescott. Why should he support me, when he couldn’t rely on me to get the job done?’
eD – ‘Dude you just gotta trust in yourself again, the only person you need rely on is you...just believe in yourself, have faith?’
Travis – ‘Why? Does anyone else?’ Does Declan trust and have faith in Travis Roberts? No...because no-one does, you’d have to be monumentally retarded to do so at this point.’
eD – ‘Well I have faith in you...’
Travis – ‘My point, well proven!’
[Travis then picks up the remote and unpasues his DVD and turns his attention to the imagery flashing on screen, all whilst rolling a smoke in his good hand. eD turns on his heel and stomps out of the house. When he reaches the front door, he is emt by a man in a long brown Jacket, and rimmed hat, he looks down at eD who speaks]
eD – ‘Who the hell are you...’
Man – ‘Lewton Neill, Private Investigator. Is Travis around...’
eD – ‘Private Investigator? Oh...is this about Mary Joanna?’
Lewton – ‘Great, you know about the case, give him this envelope. That saves a lot of time...I may still make happy hour.’
[The P.I. thrusts the envelope into eD’s hands and swiftly turns around. eD looks around to see if Travis has magically appeared behind him, but when he sees the coast is clear, he uses his furry little hands to tear open the envelope. A few photos of Mary Joanna are there, but eD is drawn towards the written account of the case so far:]
The moment I opened my eyes I knew it was going to be another one of those days. My head was throbbing, my eyesight blurry, I could just about make out that I had once again, fallen asleep at my desk, so affected by the Scotch I couldn’t make it back to the hovel I call home. I scrambled for my desktop clock, and as my eyes focused I could see it was already One Thirty in the afternoon, and I looked over towards two empty bottles of Scotch on the floor, jeez I went some last night, but then again, I go some every night. I stumbled across to the sink, splashed cold water on my face and then went about shaving, one of the most important rules of Private Investigating, always look presentable.
As I scraped the stubble from my cheek, I pondered how it was lucky the throbbing in my head was a hangover, and that at least it ruled out the possibility I’d been beaten black and blue by some goon last night. Someone once told me, every cloud has a silver lining, I asked if you’d be able to hang yourself from it? That’s just the kind of guy I am. This P.I business gets you all cynical that’s for sure.
It was about this time you came walking through my door, I still hadn’t gotten myself together and you took me by surprise. I took one look at you and knew I wanted nothing to do with whatever you wanted. Years in this trade have made me an astute judge of character, and you screamed trouble, and I don’t like trouble.
For the best Private Investigator in Los Angeles, I don’t get many jobs, alright I haven’t had any jobs recently, so I wasn’t about to turn the $5000 you threw onto my desk away. As you stormed out of my office, I turned to my coffee maker, flipped a switch and in a couple of moments had a hot cup of the dark stuff sitting in front of me. I took a big swig, nothing like a mug of coffee to get me all jittery and nervous. As the caffeine pumped around my veins I took a look over the photo’s you had supplied, and I instantly recognised the women.
It was about six months ago, I awoke, again upon my desk, clutching a bottle of whisky. I’d had a little more time to pull myself together when there was a knock at the door. As I explained, I don’t get many cases, so imagine my surprise when I heard a knock at my door proceeded by this stunning broad walking into my office. She was tall, with a slender body, and a chest a Private Investigator should make all kinds of references to. She wanted information on this GIW place or something, whilst she sat calmly in the client’s chair; it always bothered me I never asked if it was comfortable, not many people get the experience to answer that.
Anyway, I could see she was trouble, and had enough about myself to turn down her request, she didn’t try to force a wedge of dollars into my hand, so I figured she wasn’t serious anyway, so I pointed her in the direction of that washed out failure of a PI Buddy Branston, I knew he’d take any kooks case.
So although this case is still relatively young, I knew exactly where to start, I scheduled a meeting with Buddy, took me a while, the crank seems to be getting a lot of business these days. He didn’t reveal much, something about client confidentiality, as if us PI’s live by any real code of honour. But he did point me in the direction of the diner she works in. Initially I was surprised, but it made sense, broad as attractive as that, in LA, I ain’t seen her in any magazines or movies, there’s only one thing she could be doing to pay the bills, waitressing.
Anyway, to cut to the chase, I sat on that Diner until she finished her shift, then I tailed her, she went got changed in some Gas Station lavatory into something real elegant, and then went and met the guy in the photo’s. They gave me the slip after that, but I’ll be sure to get ya anymore info, but I’d say this is a good start to the investigation.
I’ll be in touch.
Lewton Neill P.I.
[eD looks at the photos and the image of Mary-Joanna Roberts and Randy Boolzian walking, each with their hand on the other’s buttocks, and his jaw drops to the floor...]
eD – ‘No....NO....NO!’
eD – ‘eD cASe, Agent to ‘The Most Influential Icon in Sports Entertainment this Millenia’...*pauses for reply*...No! Not Alex Kiseragi! Who and what has he ever influenced? Apart from a few kids coming out of the closet, all very admirable and such....*listens*...Yes I represent Mr Travis Roberts...’
[eD continues his march up the hill, listening intently to the person on the other end of the phone]
eD – ‘And where are you calling from?...Powerslam Magazine?...And you’d like an interview? Well I’m not sure whether we can fit you into ‘The Blessed Ones’ very busy schedule...I’m sure I can give you a quote, what would you like to know?’
[eD stops in his tracks when he hears the question, and almost starts trembling with rage, but he calmly responds to the reporter]
eD – ‘Let me just make sure I got all that, ‘Is Travis Roberts now considered the industry’s biggest joke? He seems to have been in hiding since his defeat at Distant Whispers, his only on camera appearance since was a brief return at Sentinel, even then he walked away from the ring, as if he knew he was humiliating himself? Is he worthy of being included in the PPv Horizons, let alone the main event?’...Yeah, word for word, I have a good memory...*listens*...’How long till you can get a response from Travis?’, well I think I can safely say ‘The Headliner’ won’t have anything to say over such ridiculous claims, he won’t lower himself to the level of gutter trash journalism...’
[eD once again listens to the reporter on the other side of the phone, and then erupts]
eD – ‘Travis Roberts may not give you a quote, you smarmy little piece of shit, but the eDman certainly will. You wanna know why ‘The Headliner’ is keeping away from the camera’s? You think this ‘media blackout’ from ‘The Blessed One’ is an acceptance that he is not good enough? What planet are you living on? For the past six months, week in, week out, Travis Roberts has busted his ass for Global Impact Wrestling. He has done more interviews, had more camera time promoting the company to new audiences, dedicated himself to entertaining more influential members of the entertainment industry, than any of GIW’s other Global Heavyweight or Hardcore Champions in his time here.
It’s not a fucking coincidence that since Travis Roberts’ arrival in GIW the company has gone from a medium sized national promotion to worldwide phenomenon? What else would you attribute that growth to? Randy Boolzian’s fear of the public seeing a glimpse of the real him? Komosubes incoherent rantings and ravings? Lord Deathmans cheap kids party tricks? No, no, you are absolutely right it has had nothing to do with the charm, genius and technical ability of ‘The Blessed One’, Global Impact Wrestling’s sudden growth has been all down to Mr Personality himself, our current Global Heavyweight Champion, Mr Alex Kiseragi, the only man on the planet that can make a turnbuckle seem charismatic!
You want to start printing some juicy gossip about my client to boost your lousy dirt sheets circulation, your not gonna get that crap from eD cASe. See I know what all this is about, it’s the same reason GIW will be clamouring at ‘The Headliner’ to get back in front of the camera quick sharp. Sure Travis Roberts lost the title at Distant Whispers, but he didn’t stop being ‘The Headliner’. Sure Alex Kiseragi holds a strap of leather with some gold glued to it, but it doesn’t make him ‘Blessed’. It’s only taken a week and it’s already obvious to all that can see, this Industry needsTravis Roberts more than he needs them. It’s the road to Horizons, and the viewers and the wrestling enthusiasts demand more than ‘The Dragons’ heat sucking ‘Thank You Daddy Dearest’ speeches to keep them interested. They expect more than Randy Boolzian telling them all what they knew he’d say anyway. Even Randy knew this, that’s why he took up eD cASe’s offer. Sure the degenerate is lacking in a few basic human abilities, but even he could see that Randy Boolzian vs Alex Kiseragi was a disaster of a Main Event waiting to happen...the fans needed a Headliner in there, and they got it.
So maybe the question shouldn’t be is Travis Roberts’ the industry’s biggest joke? It should be is the Industry just one big joke to Travis Roberts right now?...*listens*...I’m not Declan Prescott’s agent, anything you wanna know about his thoughts and motivations you better get his office on the line...’
[With that eD ends the call and slips the phone back into his inside breast pocket, and continues walking towards the house, which is quite close now. As he approaches his phone rings once again, he looks at the caller ID, frowns and stops his approach to the house a few feet away. He turns his abck and takes the call...]
eD – ‘Yeah, I really wish you wouldn’t call me....Yeah....Look I don’t really wanna know, I wish you had never gotten me involved...Of course I remember, that’s why I’m doing this right?...yeah, I just saw him, he doesn’t have a clue...look I have to see Travis now....god I don’t know how I can even look him in the eyes...’
[With this eD cends the call and heads inside. We are then transported into the main hall of Travis’ mansion. He is spread out on a large leather sofa, a DVD on pause, a phone clutched to his ear and a burning roll up in his other hand]
Travis – ‘Look, I’m failing to see what is so incomprehensible about my request...you are Burger King right?...*takes a toke of his roll up whilst listening to the reply*...Good, and isn’t one of your motto’s ‘Have it your way’?...*takes another toke*...Great. Well listen to me quite simply kid, My[/b] way is two flame grilled, Extra Large Double Cheesburgers, with two extra large portions of chips, all tucked onto the back of some motorcycle, with your spotty, uneducated ass riding it to my door!...*Takes another toke*...Try Pizza Hut bitch!?!?!?’[/color]
[Travis takes the receiver from his ear and stares in stunned silence at the phone. eD breaks this moment by waddling through the double doors, Travis turns to look at his only friend, who greets him with a smile]
eD – ‘How’s it going Big Guy!’
Travis – ‘Well I just got owned by some punk who works at Burger King, apart from that relative humiliation, things are average...oh, and never call me ‘Big Guy’ ever again...’
eD – ‘Noted...but hey dude, you should be used to humiliation by now...you did lose to the guy with the Dragon Fetish.’
[Travis doesn’t reply, just simply stares at eD and takes a toke from the smoke once more. eD looks a little panicked, but continues calmy]
eD – ‘Too soon?’
Travis – ‘Let’s just say it was lucky I took the precaution of learning to roll up a smoke with one hand many years ago, because you are in no place to be making jokes Little Dude...’
eD – ‘Oh come one dude! You know I don’t think like that. I know you got that guys number, just gotta hope he doesn’t have yours...right? Right? You hear what I’m saying? You don’t want any deep breathing phone calls late at night...yeah?’
[Travis just stares at eD blankly, takes another toke, blows the smoke directly in eD’s direction and speaks]
Travis – ‘Gay jokes are well below you...Whether I can beat Kiseragi though, remains to be seen. But regardless, you are in no position to be making jokes, I’m still not happy with you for Saturday’s little display...’
eD – ‘It’s done now, anyway it was for your own good...’
Travis – ‘In the name of all that is TWiSTeD, you must really hate me! Was I really that wrong to get you out of ‘The Street’ give you a life away from all your mistakes? I thought I was helping you, when apparently you despise me...’
eD – ‘No man, Dude you know I’m grateful, seriously...’
Travis – ‘Then why do you want me to humiliate myself all over again, but not just a regular humiliation, a humiliation in front of the entire world, at GIW’s biggest PPV? I couldn’t beat Alex Kiseragi and Brandon Brown, what makes you think I’m gonna do any better against Kiseragi, Boolzian and Declan?’
eD – ‘Your being delusional, you only just missed out a Distant Whispers, you’ve had a lot on your plate...you’ll be back to normal come Horizons?’
Travis – ‘Right, of course I’ll be back to my best soon...how soon exactly eD? Will it be before or after I have to take a beating from my best friend? ‘Cause thanks to you, not only do I have to face him at Horizons, but now I have to face him this weekend. Hell I’m not surprised he booked this match this week, he’ll get to show the world exactly how much Travis Roberts relied on him.’
eD – ‘You know that’s crap as well as I do. Christ your starting to sound like all those damn conspiracy theorists. Declan may be all about himself, but he knows how talented you are. He didn’t put himself in the Horizons match to humiliate you, it’s because he want’s to ensure neither Kiseragi nor BoolZ plunge this company into the depths of hell before 2009. And I spoke to him earlier, he didn’t even book this week’s card, I don’t think he really wants to face you at all...’
Travis – ‘You did what? Why the hell are you bothering Declan? Does he think that I sent you? That’s even worse than needing your Daddy to beat up your enemies! What in the name of TWiSTeD were you thinking?’
eD – ‘I just wanted to know why he was being such an ass that’s all. And I found out you didn’t even tell him about the divorce...so I did.’
Travis – ‘You really are a wretched excuse for an organism aren’t you? You really are as stupid as you look. The divorce is a non issue, that whore was dead to ‘The Headliner’ when he opened his eyes to see only your freakish face looking back at ‘The Blessed One’. What good can come from highlighting the fact that Travis Roberts is an awful judge of character? Declan would never make such a stupid error, he and Cara are made for one another, almost as if it were their destiny, neither would wish harm on the other. Whereas ‘The TWiSTeD Icon’ managed to choose, for his bride, the only women who has been scientifically proven to be able to suck blood from a stone. All you’ve managed to do is give ‘The Heart and Soul of Global Impact Wrestling’ another reason to distance himself from the mess that is Travis Roberts. Great work, I’m glad I pay you all that money to look out for my best interests...’
eD – ‘You know, if Declan is even a quarter of the man you give him credit for being, he’ll see, just as I do, that this Mary-Joanna shit is what’s behind all this crap. He’ll recognise you could channel this to your advantage given the right support. Look I’m sorry I put the belt up at Horizons, I know how many memories that must have brought back...’
Travis – ‘I couldn’t care less about that belt, hell I almost put it on E-Bay a couple of times back in the day but I could never find the damn thing. It’s worthless, just like that ex-wife of mine. The only thing that matters is I’m just not good enough to be in that match, and believe me Declan is smart enough to see beyond this Mary-Jo smokescreen you have created. If I was half the man I claimed to be, I would have got the job done, I would have had a plan B, but I relied upon Declan Prescott. Why should he support me, when he couldn’t rely on me to get the job done?’
eD – ‘Dude you just gotta trust in yourself again, the only person you need rely on is you...just believe in yourself, have faith?’
Travis – ‘Why? Does anyone else?’ Does Declan trust and have faith in Travis Roberts? No...because no-one does, you’d have to be monumentally retarded to do so at this point.’
eD – ‘Well I have faith in you...’
Travis – ‘My point, well proven!’
[Travis then picks up the remote and unpasues his DVD and turns his attention to the imagery flashing on screen, all whilst rolling a smoke in his good hand. eD turns on his heel and stomps out of the house. When he reaches the front door, he is emt by a man in a long brown Jacket, and rimmed hat, he looks down at eD who speaks]
eD – ‘Who the hell are you...’
Man – ‘Lewton Neill, Private Investigator. Is Travis around...’
eD – ‘Private Investigator? Oh...is this about Mary Joanna?’
Lewton – ‘Great, you know about the case, give him this envelope. That saves a lot of time...I may still make happy hour.’
[The P.I. thrusts the envelope into eD’s hands and swiftly turns around. eD looks around to see if Travis has magically appeared behind him, but when he sees the coast is clear, he uses his furry little hands to tear open the envelope. A few photos of Mary Joanna are there, but eD is drawn towards the written account of the case so far:]
The moment I opened my eyes I knew it was going to be another one of those days. My head was throbbing, my eyesight blurry, I could just about make out that I had once again, fallen asleep at my desk, so affected by the Scotch I couldn’t make it back to the hovel I call home. I scrambled for my desktop clock, and as my eyes focused I could see it was already One Thirty in the afternoon, and I looked over towards two empty bottles of Scotch on the floor, jeez I went some last night, but then again, I go some every night. I stumbled across to the sink, splashed cold water on my face and then went about shaving, one of the most important rules of Private Investigating, always look presentable.
As I scraped the stubble from my cheek, I pondered how it was lucky the throbbing in my head was a hangover, and that at least it ruled out the possibility I’d been beaten black and blue by some goon last night. Someone once told me, every cloud has a silver lining, I asked if you’d be able to hang yourself from it? That’s just the kind of guy I am. This P.I business gets you all cynical that’s for sure.
It was about this time you came walking through my door, I still hadn’t gotten myself together and you took me by surprise. I took one look at you and knew I wanted nothing to do with whatever you wanted. Years in this trade have made me an astute judge of character, and you screamed trouble, and I don’t like trouble.
For the best Private Investigator in Los Angeles, I don’t get many jobs, alright I haven’t had any jobs recently, so I wasn’t about to turn the $5000 you threw onto my desk away. As you stormed out of my office, I turned to my coffee maker, flipped a switch and in a couple of moments had a hot cup of the dark stuff sitting in front of me. I took a big swig, nothing like a mug of coffee to get me all jittery and nervous. As the caffeine pumped around my veins I took a look over the photo’s you had supplied, and I instantly recognised the women.
It was about six months ago, I awoke, again upon my desk, clutching a bottle of whisky. I’d had a little more time to pull myself together when there was a knock at the door. As I explained, I don’t get many cases, so imagine my surprise when I heard a knock at my door proceeded by this stunning broad walking into my office. She was tall, with a slender body, and a chest a Private Investigator should make all kinds of references to. She wanted information on this GIW place or something, whilst she sat calmly in the client’s chair; it always bothered me I never asked if it was comfortable, not many people get the experience to answer that.
Anyway, I could see she was trouble, and had enough about myself to turn down her request, she didn’t try to force a wedge of dollars into my hand, so I figured she wasn’t serious anyway, so I pointed her in the direction of that washed out failure of a PI Buddy Branston, I knew he’d take any kooks case.
So although this case is still relatively young, I knew exactly where to start, I scheduled a meeting with Buddy, took me a while, the crank seems to be getting a lot of business these days. He didn’t reveal much, something about client confidentiality, as if us PI’s live by any real code of honour. But he did point me in the direction of the diner she works in. Initially I was surprised, but it made sense, broad as attractive as that, in LA, I ain’t seen her in any magazines or movies, there’s only one thing she could be doing to pay the bills, waitressing.
Anyway, to cut to the chase, I sat on that Diner until she finished her shift, then I tailed her, she went got changed in some Gas Station lavatory into something real elegant, and then went and met the guy in the photo’s. They gave me the slip after that, but I’ll be sure to get ya anymore info, but I’d say this is a good start to the investigation.
I’ll be in touch.
Lewton Neill P.I.
[eD looks at the photos and the image of Mary-Joanna Roberts and Randy Boolzian walking, each with their hand on the other’s buttocks, and his jaw drops to the floor...]
eD – ‘No....NO....NO!’
