Synergy Results #16 - August 30th, 2010

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: Welcome to Synergy!

Covert Jay: Huttah!

Vinegar: Before we get underway, we go backstage with Grey Coppi, who has had the luck of catching the mysterious Firestar just as she is arriving!

Cut to backstage, where we see Coppi running to catch up to the hard to miss outfit of Firestar, but he stops short as he makes a connection.

Lieberjosch: Is she getting a bag out of the trunk of Jet's Prius?

Covert Jay: Ninja! Uh... I got nothing.

Vinegar: The pause may have cost him, she's starting away!

Coppi begins to run after her, but she ducks into the building. As Coppi rushes in through the doors, she's gone!

Lieberjosch: We'll rejoin Coppi if he catches back up.

Dennis: Ladies and gentlemen, this is UGWC Synergy! Our first contest will be scheduled for one fall!

“Immortal” hits. Hastings wears a dark cloak to the ring. When he comes out he pauses on the stage and performs his taunt. He has an almost regal aura to him.

Dennis: Introducing first, from Hartford, Connecticut, even though he hangs at eD cASe’s apartment on weekends – yeah, eD fucking cASe – weighing 230 pounds, The Immortal DONOVAN HASTINGS!

Lieberjosch: Why is Hastings coming out first?

Vinegar: Do you really want Daniel Hanson to be the first thing people see as soon as they start to watch?

Lieberjosch: Fair point.

“Around The World” smashes into play and within moments, Daniel Hanson has leapt onto the stage. He raises his arms high in the air and then jogs down the ramp, high fiving fans as he goes. He then leaps onto the apron with both fit, jumps over the top rope and raises his arms again.

Dennis: And the opponent, from Las Vegas, Nevada and weighing 191 pounds, DANIEL HANSON!

Vinegar: Hanson seems to be enjoying himself here, BUT NO! Hastings clobbers him from behind and starts kicking the hell out of my former broadcast partner. I should probably care more than I do.

Jay: Hastings used a –

Vinegar: Sneaky ninja move, yeah, yeah. Why don’t you say something fucking original?

Jay: Why don’t you die?

Lieberjosch: Meanwhile Hastings has pulled Hanson up and shoved him into the corner. He slaps him harshly on the chest, grinning broadly. Now he pulls Daniel out and into a hip toss. Hastings is the bigger and stronger man in this match. He’s also better equipped technically and with submissions. Don’t forget he has more experience too. What exactly does Hanson have to offer this match?

Vinegar: A foul mouth and that’s about it. Now Hastings dragging him by the hair around the ring. He’s just humiliating Hanson at this point. This one might be over before it even begins –

Jay: HUTTAH!

Lieberjosch: In usual fashion, Nicholas seems to have spoken too soon. Hanson just delivered a surprisingly impressive kick above his head and right into The Lord Chief’s cranium. Hastings stumbles back dazed and that’s the opportunity Hanson needed. We’ll see if he can do anything with it.

Vinegar: Daniel bounces off the ropes and comes back with a very impressive running dropkick! Hastings is sent to the canvas here. Hanson briefly thrusts one arm into the air and then connects with a knee drop across The Immortal’s face! Hastings seems to have been caught off guard, as we all were to be honest.

Jay: Hanson moves fast! Fast like a you-know-what!

Vinegar: Especially for a man with a broken neck. How is Hanson even competing here tonight?

Lieberjosch: If Kurt Angle can still walk, I don’t see why Hanson can’t compete. Other then the fact he’s a scrawny weakling, with absolutely no talent, I mean.

Vinegar: Hastings might not agree with your assessment, Hans. Wait, he just knocked Hanson inside out with a single punch – yeah, I spoke too soon, again. The Immortal pulls his opponent back up and looks for a gut buster now. He connects viciously and Daniel is writhing in agony… wait, he has a smile on his face!

Jay: Masochist ninja!

Lieberjosch: He’s pulling himself back up and Nicholas is right, he’s smiling the smile that a mongoloid would use after reading a Dylan James poem. He’s telling Hanson to bring it on and The Lord Chief happily complies, sending Hanson crumpling to the ring with quite a big spine buster.

Vinegar: These big moves from Hastings lead me to think that he took that flurry of Hanson offence pretty personally. He’s making sure to inflict some real pain now, before locking in a stiff headlock on the downed Hanson. Daniel is fading here.

Lieberjosch: But Hastings now releases the hold. He apparently wants to hurt Hanson a bit more. Normally I’d say that was a mistake, but it’s Hanson, so why would I?

Jay: Underdog ninja?

Vinegar: Hastings lifting Hanson into the air CALLING FOR THE DESTINY’S CALL! IT’S LIGHT OUT TIME FOR HANSON – NO! DANIEL SOMEHOW SLIDES FREE, LANDING RIGHT ON HIS FEET BEHIND THE LORD CHIEF! HASTINGS TURNS AROUND RIGHT INTO THE FIRST PLACE!

Lieberjosch: Not quite. Hastings pushes him away into the ropes, before sliding out of the ring. The Immortal clearly frustrated with Hanson’s resilience.

Vinegar: BAMN! Baseball slide from Hanson sends Hastings toppling into the safety barrier! Hanson has faired much better than anyone could have expected here. But what’s he doing now?!?!

Lieberjosch: Hanson has climbed to the top rope and is waving to the fans. Oh wow, he leaps off! HUGE diving dropkick all the way to the outside!

Vinegar: But Hastings leaps to safety at the last moment! CRASH! Hanson just got demolished against that safety barrier! Hastings rolling what’s left of Daniel into the ring. Setting him up. BANG! CONNECTS WITH THE DESTINY’S CALL! ONE! TWO! THREE!

Lieberjosch: This one is done. Hanson seems to in a fair amount of pain. I’m amused.

Vinegar: Hastings the clear victor tonight, but I think Hanson put up an impressive fight.

Jay: Are you high? He hit about five moves.

Vinegar: That’s five more than anyone expected him to.

Jay: Fair point.

Vinegar: But look, Hanson is getting to his feet! He’s aching, you can tell, but he raises his arm nonetheless. I think he just enjoyed being able to wrestle here tonight. Oh dear, that last blow must have knocked him senseless. He’s offering his hand for Hastings to shake!

Jay: Like sticking your dick in a piranha’s mouth. Ricardo gave me that one.

Lieberjosch: And Hastings accepted! Surely he’s going to pull him into some sort of attack and then laugh as Hanson lays broken and beaten on the canvas… no, Hastings is leaving the ring! This is bizarre.

Vinegar: DAMMIT! Travis Roberts sliding in from the other side and kicking Hanson below the belt! Daniel’s down on the mat and The Headliner is kicking the hell out of him! Hanson was a fool for letting his guard down! This is typical behaviour of these two thugs.

Lieberjosch: And now it makes sense. Hastings was simply leaving the ring to grab a steel chair. He’s back inside the squared circle now and has some obvious plans of acquainting it with what’s left of Hanson.

We are The Saints!

We signed our life away!

Vinegar: Business is gonna pick up now. Here come the Cooperative Champions racing down the ramp. Andy slides in first, ducks a shot from that chair, kicks it outta Hastings’ hands and begins blasting The Load Chief with some furious fists! Don’t say it, Jay!

Jay: FISTS OF FURY!!!!!

Lieberjosch: Meanwhile Prescott is focusing on Roberts. The Headliner able to wrestle The Darkest Light to the ground and is hitting him with some stiff knees. Where has Roberts been lately, anyway?

Vinegar: I heard he went to Canada for a while – he has relatives there or something. Anyway, Declan scrambles free and bounces off the ropes, charging at Roberts. But Hastings shoves Andy into Declan and both Champs go tumbling to the mat. Andy is almost instantly back up, smashing Roberts down with a massive spear! Hastings pulling Andy off his partner, but now Declan with a German suplex from behind, takes The Lord Chief down!

Lieberjosch: Now Savana is on top of Roberts, blasting him with fists. But The Headliner sends him tumbling to the side with a well placed eye poke. Execution over aggression, it would seem.

Vinegar: Prescott now eyeing that chair. He grabs it, but Hastings with a low blow from behind! Declan hesitated for a second there and it cost him. Now Roberts plants Declan with a DDT! BUT WHAT’S THIS?!?!

Lieberjosch: ‘This’ is bad special effects. Why The Consortium keeps letting ‘this’ occur on their show is the real question.

Vinegar: It’s Ezekiel! He’s back again, descending from the ceiling on bright, golden white wings! He’s now in the ring between The Saints and Roberts and Hastings! With a GIANT double clothesline, he sends them both tumbling out of the ring! Ezekiel is here to help The Saints Of Los Angeles two weeks running!

Lieberjosch: And there go the fake wings. Those things look really cheap, I have to say.

Vinegar: They look damn real to me, but I have no idea how to explain them! Either way, Ezekiel is now checking on the three men in the ring. They’re all getting back to their feet, Hanson and Zeke exchanging a quick bear hug. Meanwhile Roberts and Hastings are backing up the ramp, clearly wanting no part of the four men in the ring.

Jay: And now Declan is calling for a microphone. He might end up saying more than I have this match!

Declan: Umm… hi, everyone. Thankyou for watching. We… well, there’s been a lot of talk lately. About Outlast, I mean. Now that it’s only one week away, we’re… urgh… out of time, I guess. We need to announce our team. And, well, you’re looking at it. Andy Savana, Ezekiel Pax, Daniel Hanson and Declan Prescott. All four of us will be teaming up to take on The TWiSTeD Turkeys and whatever… well… whatever flunkeys they beg enough to join their team. And as for our team name, well, Andy, take it away, my friend.

Vinegar: Declan passing the mic to Savana. I wonder what their team will be called! Something deep and reflexive, knowing Declan!

Savana: Team Five. We are Team Five. Since we are the fifth team on the card, we thought it was appropriate.

Vinegar: …

Lieberjosch: …

Jay: That name… IS AWESOME!!!!

[Lord Hastings]

Lieberjosch: Going backstage again, this time with Jason Reeves!

Reeves strides down the hallway, following at a prudent distance as Firestar is rounding a corner.

Reeves: Coppi didn't have the stuff to keep up, but I won't let her get away. This is going to be the interview of a lifetime!

He increases his pace, but not so much as to wear himself out. As he turns the corner, he sees the signature outfit as Firestar steps into Alex Kiseragi's locker room. Knowing he has her cornered, he steps right up to the door and knocks confidently. After a few moments, Katie Piper pokes her head out.

Katie: Uh, yeah?

Reeves(pausing at first): Just wanting to get that all important first backstage interview with Firestar! May I have a word?

Katie: Firestar? Why would she be in here?

The door pulls open the rest of the way as Alex Kiseragi steps into view.

Kiseragi: Can I help you?

Reeves(trying to peek into the room around the couple): Uh... didn't Firestar come in here?

A-Kis and Katie share a puzzled look, then turn to look questioningly at Reeves.

Katie: Wouldn't she be more likely to be in Deimos' locker room?

Reeves scratches his head for a moment, then it dawns on him that he's made a mistake.

Reeves: Oh no!

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: Next up is a match that promises to be a exciting contest of athletic young contenders.

Lieberjosch: Otherwise known as a filler match of nobodies.

Vinegar: Nobodies? We have one half of the Cooperative Champions coming up.

Lieberjosch: Yeah, the awful half.

Jay: I’m with N-Vins. This one’s gonna be ninjarific.

Vinegar: N-Vins?

Jay: It’s gonna catch on. The ladies will love it.

Dennis: The following contest is a triple threat match, scheduled for one fall!

Iron Man starts to play and Scott Bauer walks out to the top of the ramp, initially to a surprisingly great ovation which quickly dies down to a slightly disappointed grumble.

Lieberjosch: What the hell happened there?

Vinegar: That was once the entrance theme of Ezekiel Pax.

Lieberjosch: The weirdo that showed up last week?

Vinegar: The very same, back when he had a second name.

Bauer starts to make his way towards the ring.

Dennis: Introducing first! From New York City, New York! Weighing in at 240lbs! Scott Baueeeer!!!

Vinegar: Scott Bauer, a former pro boxer making his UGWC debut here tonight.

Jay: Didn’t any of you watch UFC 118 last night? Boxers wrestling? This guys gonna get messed up.

Vinegar: I think Scott Bauer has a bit more experience in the field then James Toney and it’ll be interesting to see how his background shapes his style in the ring.

Bauer slides into the ring and gets up, starting to stretch and waiting for his opponents.

A Dijerido is heard playing in the arena as a shot of some kangaroos bounding off into the sunset is shown on the globaltron before the opening Riff for "Beds are burning" by Midnight Oil takes over the P.A. system as "the original Aboriginal" makes his way down to the ring, smiling a big smile showing blindingly white teeth. A few steps behind him in Sheena Ramone, looking as miserable as usual.

Dennis: And the opponent! Accompanied to the ring by Sheena Ramone. From Torres Straight Islands, Queensland, Australia! Weighing in at 190lbs! Paul Cockatooooooo!!!

Lieberjosch: What’s the wench doing out here?

Vinegar: I wouldn’t let her hear you call her that.

Lieberjosch: I’m not scared of some angry adolescent girl.

Vinegar: Well the word I’ve heard is that she’s watching Paul Cockatoo’s back after the Royal 1st Battalions attack on the main event last week.

Lieberjosch: As if she’s some kind of bodyguard. He’d be better of with Ethan King.

As he walks down, he high-fives a couple of fans, and if he can, manages to take a peek down some hot girls tops. He slides into the ring, and does an air drum solo to the drum solo of Beds are Burning, before flashing another smile to the crowd and awaiting his opponent. Sheena Ramone takes a place on the outside of the ring, scowling at the fans nearby.

Saints of Los Angeles starts to play and Andy Savana comes out onto the ramp. He twists his neck left and right and makes his way down towards the ring.

Dennis: And their opponent! Currently residing in the City of Angels! Weighing in at 244lbs! One half of the UGWC Cooperative Champions! Andy Savanaaaaaaaa!!!

Andy makes his way towards the ring, while stretching out parts of the body. Finally, he gets into the ring, and runs his hand through his hair for the crowd.

Vinegar: That’s all of our competitors. Owen Peterson calls for the bell.

Ding! Ding!

Vinegar: It’s underway. These three scoping each other out in the middle of the ring.

Lieberjosch: And we have a three way Greco-Roman knuckle lock.

Vinegar: These three pitting upper body strength against each other. The bigger men taking the advantage over the smaller Cockatoo, driving him down to his knees. They’re turning on each other now.

Jay: Cockatoo’s going to show them not to take their eyes off a ninja.

Vinegar: While Savana and Bauer attempt to gain the upper hand in this test of strength, Paul Cockatoo able to push back up to his feet and hit’s a front dropkick to both of his opponents.

Lieberjosch: He didn’t even manage to knock them off their feet.

Vinegar: He’s back onto his feet though before they can regain themselves. Bauer and Savana look at each other and both attempt to clothesline him. Cockatoo ducks it and runs to the ropes. Comes back with a double clothesline of his own.

Lieberjosch: Fail.

Vinegar: That may have been overly optimistic. Both of the bigger men remain on their feet. They each boot him in the gut, Cockatoo taken over with a double suplex.

Lieberjosch: It’s not a bad idea from this Bauer guy to try to team up with the biggest and most experienced man in the match. Of course it can’t last forever.

Vinegar: Savana and Bauer pull Cockatoo back up to his feet, Bauer pushes him into the corner and starts to land body blows. That boxing coming to the fore. Savana’s directing traffic behind him. Bauer with an Irish whip and Savana pulls him up into a sidewalk slam.

Jay: Even a Ninja will struggle to get his ninja on with two guys watching him.

Vinegar: Bauer pulling Cockatoo back to his feet again. Hit’s him with a scoop slam. Bauer hitting the ropes this time and- Gets cut off by a back elbow from Andy Savana.

Lieberjosch: Inexperience showing itself there. Everyone knows these in-match alliances never last.

Vinegar: Bauer trying to get to his feet but Savana is right on him to follow up. He takes him down again with a standing neck breaker.

Jay: And they’ve taken their eyes off the Ninja.

Lieberjosch: So what? He’s still on the ground wincing.

Vinegar: Savana dragging Bauer away from the ropes. He’s putting in a camel clutch. He’s got the submission in tight.

Jay: And now the Ninja strikes.

Vinegar: Paul Cockatoo is back up to his feet and hit’s a running dropkick to Savana, breaking the hold and knocking him down.

Jay: That’s what I’m talking about.

Vinegar: Cockatoo following up with some stomps to both men, keeping them down and he drives Savana out of the ring under the bottom rope. Bauer starting to recover as Cockatoo tries to follow up. He counters with some stiff body punches that rock him back. Bauer with a Samoan drop.

Lieberjosch: And now he’s going to go to the top rope. More of that inexperience and frankly, lack of reading on display here.

Vinegar: Savana gets back onto the apron and shoves Bauer back into the ring.

Lieberjosch: Not the usual failing but shows my point none-the-less.

Vinegar: Savana going right up to the top now though. Top rope leg drop connects with Bauer. Here’s a cover!

1!

2!

Vinegar: No, Bauer gets a shoulder up. Cockatoo’s recovered as well though. Springboards off the middle rope and takes Savana over with a hurricanrana.

Jay: Ninjariffic head scissoring skills!

Vinegar: Savana able to partially roll through and gets back to his feet. Cockatoo hits him with a DDT! Here’s another cover.

1!

2!

Vinegar: Bauer this time breaks up the count at two.

Lieberjosch: As feeble minded as Savana is, even he could have powered out of the weak pinning of Paul Cockatoo.

Vinegar: Well Scott Bauer saved him the effort. Bauer pulling Cockatoo up this time, landing some clubbing blows to him. Looks like he’s going for a vertical suplex.

Jay: Or a brain buster.

Vinegar: Yes, also an option. Cockatoo blocking it though. Savana with an enziguri!

Lieberjosch: Where did he come from?

Vinegar: Savana got back to his feet and nailed an enziguri to the back of Scott Bauer’s head. Bauer goes down and before Cockatoo can make a move, Savana has him on his shoulders. Rolling Samoan drop from Savana. Now he’s heading up to the top rope.

Jay: I think Savana is going to take it here.

Vinegar: Savana’s Suicide Dive off the top! Connects with Scott Bauer!

Jay: Shove that up your Article 3 violation.

Vinegar: Before he can go for a cover though Cockatoo’s in front of him. Fall From Ularu!

Lieberjosch: Savana’s managed to land next to the ropes though. Probably unintentional but a fortunate move.

Vinegar: So Cockatoo’s covering Bauer instead. Lateral press!

1!

2!

3!

Ding! Ding! Ding!

Dennis: Here is your winner! Paul Cockatoooooooo!!!

Vinegar: An impressive win from Paul Cockatoo, upsetting a Champion like that.

Lieberjosch: I wouldn’t say he upset Andy Savana as much as he beat a debutant.

Vinegar: Strong effort from Scott Bauer. I imagine we’ll see a lot more of him in the coming weeks.

Paul drops out of the ring and celebrates with Sheena on the outside as the two of them make their way back up the ramp.

Vinegar: Next up, The UGWC Champion takes on the other half of the Cooperative Champions and Outlast team Captain Declan Prescott.

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: I'm getting word that that elusive interview with Firestar may be about to take place!

Roxy Malone stands outside the locker room of Phrixus Deimos himself, checking her hair in a compact. She addresses the camera finally.

Roxy: Roxy Malone here, about to teach my idiot counterparts that all good things come to those who wait. I've been standing outside the door to the locker room of The Champ himself, Fear! If anything about Firestar's previous appearances could be learned, it's that eventually she'll make her way right here!

The door opens and the UGWC Champ steps out into the hallway, obviously ready to make his way down to the ring for his bout with Prescott. Never one to waste a chance, Roxy pounces.

Roxy: Deimos! Any last thoughts before facing one of the Outlast captains only a week before the actual tournament?

Deimos is about to speak when a chuckling Firestar streaks past, pursued by Grey Coppi. Deimos watches her go, fascinated in spite of himself, as Roxy grunts and is about to join in the chase. As she gets started after them, ANOTHER Firestar runs down a side hall behind them, and Jason Reeves is hot on her trail. Malone stops dead in her tracks, looking first one way, then the other. Deimos joins in the back and forth, but as the doppelgangers disappear, he shakes his head and decides to just make his way out for the bout, leaving Roxy Malone confused outside his door.

The show elsewhere backstage to the private dressing room of Travis Roberts. He and Donovan Hastings are talking when The Royal 1st Battalion burst in, dressed in their full regalia. Donovan leaps out of a seat defensively.

Ryder: Whoa there gentlemen. We come in peace.

Roberts: The Headliner wonders therefore why you didn’t knock.

Duncan gestures to Johnny Blake beside him.

Ryder: He’s…impatient.

Roberts: Right. So did you have a reason for this intrusion or are you limeys just after The Blessed One’s autograph? Or maybe just to be in the presence of the TWisTeD High Commander, hmm?

Ryder: Actually, The Brigadier General has a proposal for you.

Hastings: Not interested.

He sits back down.

Ryder: Hold your horses, sir. What we suggest is an alliance. The forces of TWiSTeD fighting side by side with the Queen’s Royal 1st Battalion in the Outlast tournament.

Roberts: And why would The Headliner and the Lord Chief want to carry you window lickers through Outlast?

Ryder: Whoa now, I understand your misgivings. It is difficult to betray ones own people but I assure you, your nations reclamation will go much more smoothly with your cooperation. You will show others the way forward. Such an act would not go unnoticed. If you were to accept, I see Knighthoods in your future.

Roberts: The TWiSTeD High Commander thinks you can take your knighthood and shove it-

Hastings: We accept.

Roberts: Eh?

Ryder: You won’t regret it, gentlemen.

He taps Blake on the arm and the duo leave.

Roberts: What in the name of TWiSTeD was that?

Hastings: We needed another two people.

Roberts: And as captain, the choices were Tyvola and Declara.

Hastings: Listen, Trav. I’ve been in two of these tournaments. It helps to have some…cannon fodder. You know?

After a few moments, Roberts smiles and nods his head.

[Lord Hastings]

Dennis: The following contest is scheduled for ONE FAAAAAL!!!!!

“Phucking Phreak”

Dennis: Introducing first, from the back of the closet in yo momma’s bedroom, the world heavyweight champion!!! PPPPHRIIIIIIXXXXUUUUUSSSSSS DEEEEEEIIIIIIIMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!

Vinegar: We saw earlier tonight, the elusive Firestar running around the different sections of the backstage area, only to find out later that there were several Firestar’s. At least I think so anyway....

Covert Jay: Any Ninja can manipulate the speed of sight to create a second them!

Lieberjosch: That’s impossible, you little nit-wit!

Covert Jay: No it’s not....it’s just hard to show.

Lieberjosch: In other words; impossible.

“Strength in Numbers”

Just a slave to the city,
To indulge in the pity,
The opaque substitution,
For a real revolution,

Strength in numbers!
No one will come between us!

Dennis: And the opponent, from Sydney in the Land Down Under, weighing in at 232lbs, DECLAN PRRREEEEEESSSSSCCCCCCCOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Declan enters the arena, raising his arms to the fans. He then humbly jogs down the entranceway and rolls into the ring. He stares out at the fans in the arena, before stretching on the ropes as last minute prep.

Vinegar: This match could be the most testing for Deimos, after all; Declan has proved himself time and time again, as we have all seen before.

Lieberjosch: Yes; that does seem to be the case with most matches involving some form of powerhouse. They prove themselves because they have the skill!

DING! DING!

Vinegar: And this one is under way! Lockup in the centre of the ring, with no man giving an inch of space to work with. Declan eventually getting the upper hand, bringing the champion down to his knees, and levelling Fear with a boot to the head!

Covert Jay: OOH! Vicious Ninja!

Vinegar: Declan grabbing the head of Phrixus Deimos, who escapes his grasp, kicks the feet out from under Declan.... MILENIAL DEC...

Lieberjosch: He has the wherewithal to move away as quickly as possible!

Vinegar: Both men standing again in the middle of the ring, staring at each other....both run in......and OHH! They took each other out with a simultaneous clothesline!

Covert Jay: Now, if they were Ninja, they would be able to sense that move coming and subsequently duck!

Vinegar: Chartreuse up to a count of four here as Declan crawls to a cover on the champ!

Chartreuse: ONE!

TWO!

Lieberjosch: And Phrixus kicks out, just in the nick of time.

Vinegar: Declan seems to be questioning our official’s pace, but quickly goes right back to attack as the champion gets to his feet. Declan and Deimos trading lefts and rights in the centre of the ring, and by the reaction from the crowd at each hit, I’d say that it is a fairly even divide from the crowd here tonight. Deimos pushes Prescott off towards the ropes, and demolishes him with a spear on the rebound!

Lieberjosch: Fear not making the same mistake as he did last time, and puts some pressure on the back of Declan’s neck before again going for the Millennial Decay!

Covert Jay: Prescott showing his ninja style though, pulls Fear off of him by throwing him over his shoulder. And now we are back to where we started.

Vinegar: Hang on......I think....get a camera around there! Now!

Lieberjosch: What is it?

Vinegar: I think I just saw Firestar in the crowd!

Covert Jay:....I don’t see her. Just call the match.

Vinegar: Right, returning back to the action as we get some camera men out there. Phrixus getting frustrated now, grabs Declan, hoists him up, and breaks possibly his spine with a vicious brain buster!

Covert Jay: Oh yes....now I see......three of her?

Lieberjosch: I count four you blithering idiot!

Vinegar: Six! Six Firestars!

Covert Jay: AH HA HA!
Vinegar: They all begin to make their way down towards the ring, and Phrixus not even realising, goes in once again for the Millennial Decay and HE’S LOCKED IT IN!

Lieberjosch: He’s too close to the ropes!

Vinegar: Almost prophetic prediction there partner, as Declan is able to reach the bottom rope and start the count!

Chartreuse: ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FOUR!

Vinegar: Deimos refuses to let go! He just applies more and more pressure! Look at this, Declan is in agony!

Chartreuse: FIVE!

RING THE BELL!

DING! DING!

Dennis: Your winner via disqualification.....DECLAN PRESCOTT!

Vinegar: Phrixus letting go now....and he’s seen the approaching Firestars. He starts climbing to his feet as he looks around to see what the punch line of this joke is.

Lieberjosch: Shenanigans, pure and simple.

Vinegar: All the various Firestars remove their wigs as they chuckle at the UGWC Champion.

Covert Jay: Holy Popsicles! Enigma and Sheena!

Vinegar: And there's The Drover, Ethan King along with Paul Cockatoo!

Lieberjosch: Jasmine is even out here, as is some messy haired fellow I'm not familiar with.

Vinegar: And the two imposters on the ramp?

Lieberjosch: I should have known...

Covert Jay: DRAGON NINJA!

Vinegar: Alex Kiseragi and Jet Somers! They pull off their wigs as the entire crew make their way back up the ramp still snickering.

Lieberjosch: What the hell was the point of this charade?

Vinegar: I hate to admit it, but it showed a strong coordinated team effort from two of the teams which will be gunning for the man in the ring at Outlast!

Covert Jay: Plus, one of the teams competing next in our Main Event!

Lieberjosch: I just hope they have time to change.

Vinegar: Prescott heading up the ramp now, looks like he is just shaking his head about this entire thing, hold on!

Lieberjosch: Royal 1st Battalion!

Vinegar: We learned earlier tonight the Battalion will be joining Team TWiSTeD at Outlast, and now they’re attacking their opposing captain!

Lieberjosch: A vicious beatdown on Prescott, and they’re not done!

Vinegar: Ryder sliding into the ring, exchanging blows with Deimos! Blake slides in behind, and they overpower him!

Lieberjosch: Their opposing captain, and now the World Champion, and both enemies of TWiSTeD!

Vinegar: The Battalion earning their keep with Hastings and Roberts, and…oh, is that Somers again on the stage?

Covert Jay: That’s the real deal! It’s Firestar!

Vinegar: The Battalion has noticed her as she starts to come down the ramp, and she stops and points back at the stage.

I can’t use what I can’t abuse…

…and I can’t stop when it comes to you.

“Vow” begins to play, and a figure rushes out from backstage.

Covert Jay: Talk of the Town!!!!

Lieberjosch: Who?

Covert Jay: 2-Time LWF World Champion and former Outlast winner Alan Fernandez!

Vinegar: He slides into the ring, he’s got a mallet in his hand.

Covert Jay: Yes, the Mallet…of DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM ™.

Vinegar: Blake takes it right in the face!

Lieberjosch: Ryder rolls out of the ring, pulling Blake out.

Vinegar: Alan Fernandez has finally debuted in UGWC, and Deimos is stirring, staring at his savior.

Covert Jay: Hey, I’ll bet you Somers and Dragon had time to change.

[Lord Hastings]

Vinegar: What an amazing night it has been, and we’re still a week away from Outlast!

Lieberjosch: Tensions are running high, the entire roster is at each other’s throats.

Vinegar: We’re about to see a preview of sorts for next week, eight person cooperative action, but one fall to a finish.

“You Know My Name” begins to play as the pyros blow, and as the music softens Travis Pierce comes down the ramp to the ring.

Vinegar: Pierce is of course a team captain for next week, but tonight he’ll be teaming with another.

Covert Jay: And that’s the piercing truth.

The lights dim to a near blackout, as all you can see on the Titantron is the words: "He Is Here!" Suddenly, an explosion erupts from the stage as "Firefly" by Breaking Benjamin starts up. Medos appears just as the chorus starts. He walks to the front of the stage, looks around, raises one hand up slowly, then throws it down as yet another explosion appears from behind him. The screen is showing Medos wrestling with several other wrestlers from previous matches. Medos carries on walking down, he slaps hands with one fan, and walks past the others. He rolls into the ring, and towards a turnbuckle. He points at the fans, raises his hand to his forehead, sticks his index and middle finger out, and salutes the fans.

Vinegar: Medos is one of Pierce’s selected partners for Outlast.

Lieberjosch: And we now know that the partner that was referred to on The Piercing Truth this past week is “The Talk of the Town” Alan Fernandez!

Covert Jay: Firestar’s brother, and Fear’s former partner!

“Shout 2000” begins to play, and John Russo and Kyle Tacker come down the ramp together.

Lieberjosch: A solid showing of unity between Russo and Tacker.

Covert Jay: Well there were LWF Tag Team Champions last winter.

Mitchell: The following contest is an eight man cooperative match and is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, the team of John Russo, Kyle Tacker, Medos, and Travis Piiiiiiiieaaaaaarrrrrrrrccccceeeeeeee!!!!!

Covert Jay: We must be pressed for time.

Vinegar: Why’s that?

Covert Jay: Dennis didn’t stretch out all the names.

Lieberjosch: He’d ruin his vocal cords doing all that at once.

Covert Jay: A ninja always keeps his throat lubricated.

Lieberjosch: Ew.

“Teahouse” begins to play, and Alex Kiseragi walks out to the top of the ramp where he throws two right roundhouse kicks, each accompanied by a small pyro, followed by a split legged backflip with a larger pyro.

Lieberjosch: And already we see the unity lacking.

Vinegar: Kiseragi picked up a victory over the World Champion last week, he has to be a favorite going into the tournament next week.

The arena gets loud and the lights darken, the song Sweet Child O' Mine begins to play as soon as the first note hits Robert Montana appears, and fireworks begin to blaze left and right he begins to walk down the ramp very swiftly the spotlight following him along the way.

Vinegar: This is the UGWC debut of Robert Montana, whom I’ve seen in the past in GIW.

Covert Jay: Did you share a cup of coffee?

A silhouette resembling Jet Somers appears in the distance of the hallway, walking toward the screen. A distorted and distant Mark Collie wails: 'In time, your time will be no more...,' and the vertical control suddenly flips out as Nonpoint's "Everybody Down" hits hard and Jet runs out from behind the curtain. He runs to the edge of the stage and pumps his fist in the air a few times.

Lieberjosch: The Wild Card has already been a busy man tonight, unpredictable as always.

Covert Jay: It is the way of the ninja.

"Given to Fly" by Pearl Jam hits as Enigma appears hanging from the rafters.. As Eddie Vedder sings the line "He's flying", Enigma jumps off as if on que and soars around the ring due to the fact that he is attatched to a guy wire which allows him to gradually soar to a turnbuckle.

Mitchell: And their opponents, Robert Montana, Enigma, Jet Somers, and Alexxx Kissssssserrrrrrragiiiiiiiii!!!!

Vinegar: Enigma making his entrance, detaching his hook, and he leaps right into the ring and splashes Russo!

Covert Jay: Ninja sneak attack!

Vinegar: And here comes his partners, Somers, Montana, and Kiseragi all hitting the ring, it’s a wild brawl!

Lieberjosch: An awful decision to assign just Glenn Burke to this match, he can’t keep the peace with all eight of them in there!

Vinegar: He’s doing his best, getting control as best he can, some are out of the ring now.

Lieberjosch: The fight is spilling there.

Covert Jay: If we cut to a commercial break, they’d all magically be on their respective aprons when we came back.

Vinegar: Down to just Enigma and Medos in the ring now, as Medos takes Enigma over with an arm drag, puts him into a side headlock.

Covert Jay: We’ll have to remember that cop-out for a future broadcast.

Vinegar: Enigma standing for leverage, he pushes Medos away, Medos off the ropes runs right into a dropkick, and Enigma tags out to Montana.

Lieberjosch: We’ll see what he’s got, as Kyle Tacker takes the tag from Medos to face him.

Vinegar: Tacker going right after him, but Montana drills him with a shuffle side kick!

Lieberjosch: And now Montana taunting Tacker.

Covert Jay: Not a good idea to upset the Riot.

Vinegar: Clearly not, as Tacker is quick to his feet, and he grabs Montana and throws him into his team’s corner! Tacker pounding on Montana with right hands, and he tags Russo.

Lieberjosch: Tacker lifting and holding Montana, Russo standing behind him.

Vinegar: Tacker with the Fall In…AND AN ENZIGURI KICK STAMPS IT!

Lieberjosch: Great teamwork by Russo and Tacker!

Vinegar: Russo has the cover!





1!!!!!





2!!!!!





Vinegar: Somers breaks up the cover!

Lieberjosch: And an example of being a great teammate.

Covert Jay: You always want a crazy on your team, whether it’s cooperative or announcing.

Lieberjosch: That’s a stretch.

Covert Jay: No, I do my stretches before the show, except during the Ides of March.

Vinegar: Russo brings Montana back to the corner, tags back out to Tacker again.

Lieberjosch: And Tacker steps into the ring, and a three-point clothesline!

Vinegar: Pulls Montana back up into a waistlock, but a standing switch, and Montana with a running bulldog, both men are down!

Lieberjosch: Critical point in this match, Montana had been isolated, if he tags out the momentum could swing.

Vinegar: Montana reaching…and he makes a tag to Jet Somers! Tacker rolls away, and Pierce reaches over and tags himself in.

Lieberjosch: And now Kiseragi is trying to get Jet’s attention.

Vinegar: Somers taking a step back, looking back at him, Pierce looks confused.

Lieberjosch: Kis wants in!

Covert Jay: Dragon!

Vinegar: Somers steps back and tags in Alex Kiseragi, who wants Pierce, but Pierce is shaking his head no, and he tags out to Medos!

Lieberjosch: Travis Pierce has nothing left to prove against Alex Kiseragi, there’s no reason for them to be in the ring together.

Vinegar: Aside from them being opposing captains next week, Medos in the ring now, ducks a clothesline from Kiseragi.

Covert Jay: Transatlantic Trouble!!

Vinegar: Medos leaning on a neutral turnbuckle now, looking for the Swift Boot!

Lieberjosch: Kiseragi sidesteps!

Covert Jay: Dragon Tail!

Vinegar: Cover!





1!!!!!





2!!!!!





Vinegar: Pierce breaks up the cover!

Lieberjosch: Somers coming in after him!

Vinegar: And now they’re all coming in!

Covert Jay: MELEE!!!!!

Vinegar: Somers has his eyes locked on Pierce though, he’s got him!

Lieberjosch: BLACKOUT!

Vinegar: FALLING FUTURE TO SOMERS!!!

Covert Jay: Montana now, has Medos, The END!!!

Lieberjosch: Tacker has his brass knuckles, tells Montana, SHUT YOUR MOUTH!!!

Vinegar: AND HE TURNS RIGHT INTO ENIGMA, THUNDER CHILD!!!!!

Lieberjosch: STUNNING VICTORY FROM RUSSO!!!!!!!

Vinegar: Kiseragi is lying in wait!!!!

Lieberjosch: Yari Kick!!!

Covert Jay: DRAGOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!

Vinegar: Kiseragi is the last man PIERCE WITH A ROLL-UP OUT OF NOWHERE!!





1!!!!!





2!!!!!





3!!!!!





Mitchell: Here are your winners, John Russo, Kyle Tacker, Medos, and Travis Piiiieeeeeeeerrrrccccceeeeeeeee!!!!!

Vinegar: Pierce wasting no time getting out of dodge, escaping the ring and heading up the ramp.

Lieberjosch: Kiseragi is calling for a microphone.

Kiseragi: Hey! You think you’re so quick, don’t you?

Vinegar: Pierce looks awfully satisfied with himself.

Lieberjosch: Wouldn’t you be?

Covert Jay: Dragon Killer.

Kiseragi: Not quicker than him.

Vinegar: What’s he pointing at?

Lieberjosch: Someone behind Pierce.

Vinegar: It’s…Marek Daisuke! MAREK DAISUKE IS HERE!!!!!

Lieberjosch: Pierce has nowhere to go!

Vinegar: MISSILE KNEE TO PIERCE!!!!!

Lieberjosch: He must be the fourth man on Kiseragi’s team!

Covert Jay: Team Dragon!!!!!!!

Vinegar: Kiseragi, Somers, Cockatoo, and now Daisuke, a formidable foursome, we’ll see how they…BRICK CITY BOYZ!

Lieberjosch: We heard that Russo had been in contact with them, they’re in the ring now, attacking Alex Kiseragi!

Covert Jay: Daisuke rushing to his aid!

Vinegar: The other fallen participants from our main event all recovering, and…more coming down the ramp!

Lieberjosch: The entire locker room!

Vinegar: I see Prescott and Savana, Scott Bauer, the Aussie Rebels, the Battalion, I even see Sheena!

Lieberjosch: It’s a massive brawl, the entire roster fighting each other in the ring and all around it!

Covert Jay: A massive melee!

Lieberjosch: Well, and then there is Pierce still assed out off the side of the ramp.

Vinegar: And there, watching it all from the stage, the World Champion.

Lieberjosch: Phrixus Deimos is watching the carnage around the ring, these men will all be fighting for a shot at him.

Vinegar: And Alan Fernandez has come out and stands beside Deimos!

Covert Jay: Freak Show Central!!!!!

Vinegar: Deimos and Fernandez stand together, will the champion’s title reign survive? Who will advance to face him? Who will endure…OUTLAST!?!?!?!?

[Lord Hastings]

Credits

Hastings vs Hanson
Prescott

"Firestar" Segments
Ichabod

Triple Threat
A-Kis

Team TWiSTeD
A-Kis

Deimos vs Prescott
JK

Main Event
Hastings

Edits
Hastings

[Lord Hastings]

Remember, as a PPV week the deadline is Friday night at midnight, US East Coast time, 24 hours earlier than normal.

The voting ballot for 0utlast will look a bit different than normal, please read it carefully when you receive it.

Also, the credits would have been a very jumbled mess if I made them as detailed as contributions were, so I'll just take a moment to credit both Enigma and Life N Death for contributing ideas too. I think that covers everybody that I'm aware of that I got stuff from this week.

[capelli]

Good show, the main event was very well written. Also liked all the drama with firestar throughout the show, especially the part where they are all chasing her around.....

A few comebacks as well, I'd heard of Alan Fernandez but never thought much of em, look forward to reading some of his stuff.

Very exciting stuff throughout, can't wait till Outlast now........

[Alex Kiseragi]

I think this worked really well as the final show before Outlast. Lots of crazy shit, everyone attacking everyone and the huge brawl at the end. We haven't done that in a while and this was a good time to bring it back. I'm really looking forward to the PPV now. I'm sure it's going to be a good one.