Post by brandonbrown on Jul 25, 2009 20:39:54 GMT -5
(Brandon Brown is walking around and he sees McSkinny and Progdoor playing Guitar Hero.)
Brandon: You guys suck. (Unplugs the game and walks away.)
(Brandon heads to the cafeteria to find Big B because where else would you find a fat guy.)
Brandon: He better be in the cafeteria or else I have no idea where he will be.
(Opens the door and sees Big B playing with his food.)
Big B: (With Steak in hand) Komosube, you can’t beat me. (hits other steak with fork)
Brandon: Big B, stop playing with your food. I have to talk to you.
Big B: About what?
Brandon: I’ve thought about what you said and everything.
Big B: That’s something new.
Brandon: Shut up. Anyways, I’m here to ask you for your help at Black Axis.
Big B: Sorry, no can do.
Brandon: What do you mean? You said if I needed your help you would help me.
Big B: It’s too late now.
Brandon: No, it’s not too late. (Begging) I need your help.
Big B: I thought you were so good that you didn’t need my help.
Brandon: I was wrong. Declan and Aesc have people to help them. I can’t compete with that.
Big B: Are you afraid of two girls?
Brandon: No, it’s not the girls. I’m sure Declan probably has guys like McSkinny, Tony, Professor, George Bush, and the Ghost of Steve Irwin all lined up to help him.
Big B: So what?
Brandon: What am I going to do if they all show up?
Big B: Maybe you should get Christina Lust to fuck them all.
Brandon: Even Cara
(Big B and Brandon go into deep thought for a second.)
Big B: We can only hope.
Brandon: Yeah.
Big B: What were you saying again?
Brandon: Right, I need your help.
Big B: That’s not my problem.
Brandon: Come on, you know I always fail in the end. I never win the big one.
Big B: That’s a shame.
Brandon: What is your problem?
Big B: I thought to myself the other day about what have you ever done for me.
Brandon: I’ve done lots of things for you.
Big B: Like what?
Brandon: I got you your candy bar a few weeks ago.
Big B: You threw it at my head.
Brandon: Well, I got you a watch for your birthday.
Big B: It was a Mickey Mouse watch that broke the next day and besides you gave me the watch 3 months after my birthday.
Brandon: It’s the thought that counts.
Big B: The point is you never do anything for me. I helped you all the time and in return I got nothing.
Brandon: Let’s put all that behind us. We can be the Brown Cousins once again. We can party like no other and have fun.
Big B: Party? You never even helped me when we partied. I remember one time a few years ago we were at a bar.
(Flashback to the bar.)
Brandon: Big B, do you think I could hook up with those girls right there.
Big B: No, they are out of your league.
Brandon: Screw you, man.
Big B: (To himself) I hope he fails miserably
(Biker Gang walks up.)
Biker: Hey, fat boy give us some of your food.
Big B: No way. I paid for this.
Biker: It looks like you have had enough already.
Big B: Brandon, I need some help over here.
Brandon: (Talking to the girl in his best Val Venis voice.) Hello, Ladies.
Girl: I think your friend needs your help.
Brandon: Him, he’ll be fine.
(Biker guy hits Big B with his biker chain knocking Big B unconscious.)
Girl: He just got knocked out.
Brandon: He should have given them his food.
(Back to current day)
Brandon: Yeah, that was pretty funny.
Big B: Not for me. I had a concussion.
Brandon: You should have given up your food.
Big B: I hate you. Whatever happened with you and those girls.
Brandon: Turns out they were lesbians.
(Big B and Brandon go into a deep thought for a second.)
Big B: Too bad you didn’t get a 3-way out of that.
Brandon: I think about it every day of my life.
Big B: Anyways, I’m not helping you.
Brandon: What? It was just that one time.
Big B: No, it was more than once. Remember that time at the strip club.
Brandon: No. I actually have no idea what you are talking about.
Big B: That wasn’t you was it.
Brandon: What happened?
Big B: I don’t want to talk about it.
Brandon: Then you have no other stories where I didn’t help you.
Big B: Now, I didn’t say that no did I.
Brandon: Damn it.
Big B: A few months ago, we were working a local federation. It was us in a tag match against The Purple Shoe Mafia. We were winning the match when one of them came in the ring and hit me with a chair. They then proceeded hit me with a conchairto and a sledgehammer. You just sat there and watched.
Brandon: I have a good reason and you said it yourself. They had chairs and a sledgehammer.
Big B: You could have gotten one. There are plenty underneath the ring.
Brandon: It was just way too risky.
Big B: Then I guess it is too risky for me to help you at Black Axis.
Brandon: Please, I need your help.
Big B: I will help you on one condition.
Brandon: What is that?
Big B: You have to help me in my match.
Brandon: Are you insane?
Big B: What I have your back and you don’t have mine?
Brandon: Fine, I will help you if you help me.
Big B: So we have a deal.
Brandon: Yes, we have a deal.
Big B: Then I will make sure you are GIW Champion.
Brandon: Thanks a lot man. Good luck in your match.
Big B: Same to you. Now, go away. My food is cold.
(Brandon walks back over to McSkinny and Progdoor who are playing Guitar Hero again.)
Brandon: You guys suck. (Unplugs the game and walks away.)
(Brandon walks outside and sees a bus pull up. The bus door opens to reveal the band Motley Crue.)
Brandon: Fuck yeah. The Crue is in the house.
Vince Neil: There’s the best wrestler in the world. It’s Brandon Brown.
Brandon: Thank you.
Vince Neil: You coming to our concert tonight.
Brandon: I wouldn’t miss it.
Tommy Lee: We can’t wait to see you win the GIW Title.
Brandon: I’m looking forward to it myself.
Nikki Sixx: We have faith in you. We know you can win.
Brandon: I do have home field advantage.
Mick Mars: I’m just glad I’m not the only guy around who is from Indiana.
Brandon: Indiana is not that bad, Mick.
Mick Mars: It’s not as fun as California.
Brandon: Yeah, Indiana is pretty boring. All we have is corn.
Vince Neil: Hang in there. Anyways, see you later. You will win the title.
Brandon: I know I will.
(Motley Crue leaves. Brandon just sits at the bus stop thinking.)
David Letterman: What’s the matter kid?
Brandon: Nothing really. Wait, are you David Letterman?
David Letterman: Yes. I’m a big fan of yours and GIW.
Brandon: You watch GIW.
David Letterman: I TIVO it every Saturday. Helps me get to sleep.
Brandon: So you know I’m challenging for the GIW Title this Saturday.
David Letterman: Yes, I do. I’m rooting for you kid. I always root for people from Indiana.
Brandon: Letterman, you are much better than Jay Leno.
David Letterman: I get that sometimes.
Brandon: You should.
David Letterman: I know. Goodbye.
(Letterman leaves and Brandon sits there waiting for another celebrity.)
Brandon: I’m feeling lucky seeing all these cool celebrities. Hopefully the next one will be the best.
Michael Jackson: Hello, Brandon. You know I’m from Gary, Indiana.
Brandon: Sadly, I know.
Michael Jackson: You wrestle don’t you. I love Global Impact Wrestling. Perhaps, I should teach you one of my moves.
Brandon: One of your moves?
Michael: Yes, I call it the Thriller. You do a moonwalk and then you hit a back flip on the guy.
Brandon: Is that it?
Michael: Yes, silly.
Brandon: Then maybe I will try that. I will do anything to become champion.
Michael: Bye bye.
Brandon: Okay, the state of Indiana doesn’t take credit for him. I just hope I can win the title. I have to admit. I’m in doubt. Aesc and Declan are two great wrestlers. I can’t count on Big B showing up even if he said he would help me. But then again there is one thing I can count on and that’s the state of Indiana. I grew up in this state. I had some good times and bad times here. I won’t mention the whole Bob Knight thing but he was a good coach. There is no other place I would rather want to win the title at than Indiana. Performing in front of my fellow Hoosiers is a dream come true. I will walk out of the Conseco Fieldhouse with the title and live my dream.
Michael: Do I get to perform?
Brandon: I thought you left.
Michael: No, I was watching you.
Brandon: Okay, look over there. Two little boys getting ice cream.
Michael: Really, let me go check.
(Brandon runs away.)
Brandon: I feel sorry for those kids.
(Big B shows up.)
Big B: Remember Brandon, You help me. I help you.
Brandon: I remember Big B, but if I don’t walk out GIW Champion then you will pay.
Big B: I’m really scared.
Brandon: You should be because Michael Jackson is over there and I think he likes you.
Big B: Yeah, I’m going to run away now. (Runs away.)
Brandon: I got an idea when I saw David Letterman. I will give my top ten reasons I will win the GIW title. Here they are:
10. We’re in Indianapolis
9. Motley Crue will be there.
8. Big B Brown will be in my corner. I hope.
7. I will send Michael Jackson after them if I lose.
6. Progdoor taught me a new move.
5. I can beat McSkinny as Guitar Hero.
4. Christina and Cara will get a catfight which will distract Aesc and Declan
3. There never is a three. (thanks Hustle)
2. I’m better than the other two.
And the number 1 reason I will win the GIW Title is I can count down from ten unlike my opponents.
Brandon: This Saturday I will walk into the Conseco Fieldhouse as a challenger. I have finished second place in my life so many times. It’s time for that to change. I don’t care if you are Aesc the Dark or Declan Prescott. I will become the GIW Champion and there is nothing you can do about it. Now, I’m going to go unplug Progdoor and McSkinny’s game because I’m an asshole.
Brandon: You guys suck. (Unplugs the game and walks away.)
(Brandon heads to the cafeteria to find Big B because where else would you find a fat guy.)
Brandon: He better be in the cafeteria or else I have no idea where he will be.
(Opens the door and sees Big B playing with his food.)
Big B: (With Steak in hand) Komosube, you can’t beat me. (hits other steak with fork)
Brandon: Big B, stop playing with your food. I have to talk to you.
Big B: About what?
Brandon: I’ve thought about what you said and everything.
Big B: That’s something new.
Brandon: Shut up. Anyways, I’m here to ask you for your help at Black Axis.
Big B: Sorry, no can do.
Brandon: What do you mean? You said if I needed your help you would help me.
Big B: It’s too late now.
Brandon: No, it’s not too late. (Begging) I need your help.
Big B: I thought you were so good that you didn’t need my help.
Brandon: I was wrong. Declan and Aesc have people to help them. I can’t compete with that.
Big B: Are you afraid of two girls?
Brandon: No, it’s not the girls. I’m sure Declan probably has guys like McSkinny, Tony, Professor, George Bush, and the Ghost of Steve Irwin all lined up to help him.
Big B: So what?
Brandon: What am I going to do if they all show up?
Big B: Maybe you should get Christina Lust to fuck them all.
Brandon: Even Cara
(Big B and Brandon go into deep thought for a second.)
Big B: We can only hope.
Brandon: Yeah.
Big B: What were you saying again?
Brandon: Right, I need your help.
Big B: That’s not my problem.
Brandon: Come on, you know I always fail in the end. I never win the big one.
Big B: That’s a shame.
Brandon: What is your problem?
Big B: I thought to myself the other day about what have you ever done for me.
Brandon: I’ve done lots of things for you.
Big B: Like what?
Brandon: I got you your candy bar a few weeks ago.
Big B: You threw it at my head.
Brandon: Well, I got you a watch for your birthday.
Big B: It was a Mickey Mouse watch that broke the next day and besides you gave me the watch 3 months after my birthday.
Brandon: It’s the thought that counts.
Big B: The point is you never do anything for me. I helped you all the time and in return I got nothing.
Brandon: Let’s put all that behind us. We can be the Brown Cousins once again. We can party like no other and have fun.
Big B: Party? You never even helped me when we partied. I remember one time a few years ago we were at a bar.
(Flashback to the bar.)
Brandon: Big B, do you think I could hook up with those girls right there.
Big B: No, they are out of your league.
Brandon: Screw you, man.
Big B: (To himself) I hope he fails miserably
(Biker Gang walks up.)
Biker: Hey, fat boy give us some of your food.
Big B: No way. I paid for this.
Biker: It looks like you have had enough already.
Big B: Brandon, I need some help over here.
Brandon: (Talking to the girl in his best Val Venis voice.) Hello, Ladies.
Girl: I think your friend needs your help.
Brandon: Him, he’ll be fine.
(Biker guy hits Big B with his biker chain knocking Big B unconscious.)
Girl: He just got knocked out.
Brandon: He should have given them his food.
(Back to current day)
Brandon: Yeah, that was pretty funny.
Big B: Not for me. I had a concussion.
Brandon: You should have given up your food.
Big B: I hate you. Whatever happened with you and those girls.
Brandon: Turns out they were lesbians.
(Big B and Brandon go into a deep thought for a second.)
Big B: Too bad you didn’t get a 3-way out of that.
Brandon: I think about it every day of my life.
Big B: Anyways, I’m not helping you.
Brandon: What? It was just that one time.
Big B: No, it was more than once. Remember that time at the strip club.
Brandon: No. I actually have no idea what you are talking about.
Big B: That wasn’t you was it.
Brandon: What happened?
Big B: I don’t want to talk about it.
Brandon: Then you have no other stories where I didn’t help you.
Big B: Now, I didn’t say that no did I.
Brandon: Damn it.
Big B: A few months ago, we were working a local federation. It was us in a tag match against The Purple Shoe Mafia. We were winning the match when one of them came in the ring and hit me with a chair. They then proceeded hit me with a conchairto and a sledgehammer. You just sat there and watched.
Brandon: I have a good reason and you said it yourself. They had chairs and a sledgehammer.
Big B: You could have gotten one. There are plenty underneath the ring.
Brandon: It was just way too risky.
Big B: Then I guess it is too risky for me to help you at Black Axis.
Brandon: Please, I need your help.
Big B: I will help you on one condition.
Brandon: What is that?
Big B: You have to help me in my match.
Brandon: Are you insane?
Big B: What I have your back and you don’t have mine?
Brandon: Fine, I will help you if you help me.
Big B: So we have a deal.
Brandon: Yes, we have a deal.
Big B: Then I will make sure you are GIW Champion.
Brandon: Thanks a lot man. Good luck in your match.
Big B: Same to you. Now, go away. My food is cold.
(Brandon walks back over to McSkinny and Progdoor who are playing Guitar Hero again.)
Brandon: You guys suck. (Unplugs the game and walks away.)
(Brandon walks outside and sees a bus pull up. The bus door opens to reveal the band Motley Crue.)
Brandon: Fuck yeah. The Crue is in the house.
Vince Neil: There’s the best wrestler in the world. It’s Brandon Brown.
Brandon: Thank you.
Vince Neil: You coming to our concert tonight.
Brandon: I wouldn’t miss it.
Tommy Lee: We can’t wait to see you win the GIW Title.
Brandon: I’m looking forward to it myself.
Nikki Sixx: We have faith in you. We know you can win.
Brandon: I do have home field advantage.
Mick Mars: I’m just glad I’m not the only guy around who is from Indiana.
Brandon: Indiana is not that bad, Mick.
Mick Mars: It’s not as fun as California.
Brandon: Yeah, Indiana is pretty boring. All we have is corn.
Vince Neil: Hang in there. Anyways, see you later. You will win the title.
Brandon: I know I will.
(Motley Crue leaves. Brandon just sits at the bus stop thinking.)
David Letterman: What’s the matter kid?
Brandon: Nothing really. Wait, are you David Letterman?
David Letterman: Yes. I’m a big fan of yours and GIW.
Brandon: You watch GIW.
David Letterman: I TIVO it every Saturday. Helps me get to sleep.
Brandon: So you know I’m challenging for the GIW Title this Saturday.
David Letterman: Yes, I do. I’m rooting for you kid. I always root for people from Indiana.
Brandon: Letterman, you are much better than Jay Leno.
David Letterman: I get that sometimes.
Brandon: You should.
David Letterman: I know. Goodbye.
(Letterman leaves and Brandon sits there waiting for another celebrity.)
Brandon: I’m feeling lucky seeing all these cool celebrities. Hopefully the next one will be the best.
Michael Jackson: Hello, Brandon. You know I’m from Gary, Indiana.
Brandon: Sadly, I know.
Michael Jackson: You wrestle don’t you. I love Global Impact Wrestling. Perhaps, I should teach you one of my moves.
Brandon: One of your moves?
Michael: Yes, I call it the Thriller. You do a moonwalk and then you hit a back flip on the guy.
Brandon: Is that it?
Michael: Yes, silly.
Brandon: Then maybe I will try that. I will do anything to become champion.
Michael: Bye bye.
Brandon: Okay, the state of Indiana doesn’t take credit for him. I just hope I can win the title. I have to admit. I’m in doubt. Aesc and Declan are two great wrestlers. I can’t count on Big B showing up even if he said he would help me. But then again there is one thing I can count on and that’s the state of Indiana. I grew up in this state. I had some good times and bad times here. I won’t mention the whole Bob Knight thing but he was a good coach. There is no other place I would rather want to win the title at than Indiana. Performing in front of my fellow Hoosiers is a dream come true. I will walk out of the Conseco Fieldhouse with the title and live my dream.
Michael: Do I get to perform?
Brandon: I thought you left.
Michael: No, I was watching you.
Brandon: Okay, look over there. Two little boys getting ice cream.
Michael: Really, let me go check.
(Brandon runs away.)
Brandon: I feel sorry for those kids.
(Big B shows up.)
Big B: Remember Brandon, You help me. I help you.
Brandon: I remember Big B, but if I don’t walk out GIW Champion then you will pay.
Big B: I’m really scared.
Brandon: You should be because Michael Jackson is over there and I think he likes you.
Big B: Yeah, I’m going to run away now. (Runs away.)
Brandon: I got an idea when I saw David Letterman. I will give my top ten reasons I will win the GIW title. Here they are:
10. We’re in Indianapolis
9. Motley Crue will be there.
8. Big B Brown will be in my corner. I hope.
7. I will send Michael Jackson after them if I lose.
6. Progdoor taught me a new move.
5. I can beat McSkinny as Guitar Hero.
4. Christina and Cara will get a catfight which will distract Aesc and Declan
3. There never is a three. (thanks Hustle)
2. I’m better than the other two.
And the number 1 reason I will win the GIW Title is I can count down from ten unlike my opponents.
Brandon: This Saturday I will walk into the Conseco Fieldhouse as a challenger. I have finished second place in my life so many times. It’s time for that to change. I don’t care if you are Aesc the Dark or Declan Prescott. I will become the GIW Champion and there is nothing you can do about it. Now, I’m going to go unplug Progdoor and McSkinny’s game because I’m an asshole.