Synergy #33 Results - April 4th, 2011

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: Welcome back to Synergy!

Covert Jay: Huttah!

Vinegar: After what was an unpredictable night of action at Day of Reckoning, a new month begins, with new rivalries and new grudges to be settled. So many questions, how will Jet Somers take being screwed out of the title by the scheming HRD?

Lieberjosch: Jet screwed Jet. He tried to play them at their own game and it backfired, the only real question is has he learnt his lesson?

Vinegar: And how is Donovan Hastings going to react to the news that Chris Peterson, Part-Time UGWC Official, Full -Time Hastings Lackey ,Owen Peterson's Grandson was behind the X gimmick.

Covert Jay: My money is on delusion.

Vinegar: And how will the HRD deal with Tyvola, Gabrielle's 'boyfriend, being Travis Pierce's upcoming opponent at No Holds Barred?

Covert Jay: All great questions, but don't expect them all to be answered tonight.

Vinegar: Why not?

Covert Jay: Apart from it being the first show of the month?

Vinegar: Oh, yeah, sure, apart from that.

Covert Jay: My sources indicate this show will be heavily recapped.

Vinegar: How reliable are your sources?

Covert Jay: Well all the signs point towards a recap show.

Vinegar: What signs?

Covert Jay: Well, for a start Hans hasn't interrupted me once, and has only had one belligerent thing to say so far tonight.

Vinegar: Maybe he's being thoughtful tonight.

Covert Jay: yeah, and he always likes being talked about. Anyway, I've mentioned recap at least three times now, that never happens unless it;s a recap show.

Vinegar: Just because you said it? You're not a go...

[May I welcome you all to the first recap show of 2011, at least I think it is. Lets get on with it whilst Jay and Vinegar bicker at ringside. By the way, Jet does not think he is a deity, just a ninja. As Dennis explains the first match is a triple threat match, and The Natural born killer, Chris Peterson and Medos all make their way to the ring with their signature music blaring. This itself kind of makes a mockery of the advice given to a couple of our newer members of the roster in regards to entrances, one of whom is involved int his match. Apologies.

Anyway, NBK almost collapses into the corner clutching at his head the moment the bell rings. It must be mentioned he has been clawing at it during his entrance to the ring. So Chris Peterson and Medos lock up, and the Peterson quickly gets the advantage taking Medos down to the canvas, and putting on somewhat of a chain wrestling clinic. If you want more specifics, I apologise for the lack of detail, but I'm pretty sure there was a hammerlock in there somewhere.

Medos though manages to escape, sending Chris onto his back, and as Peterson gets up aims a kick to his ribs, and then hits drop DDT. But both men had been ignoring the Natural Born Killer, due to his erratic behaviour before the bell. However his behaviour has become less eratic, and from his corner he watches the events unfold, his eyes moving from one opponent to the other, but his twitches and lunacy seem gone, he is perfectly still. However as noted neither men have noticed this, and as Peterson goes for a small cradle on Medos and gets a two count, when both men get up they face one another. Not the Most Dangerous Rumour You've Never Heard.

NBK grabs each man by a shoulder, spins them to face him, and then takes them both down with a double clothesline. This unknown quantity then climbs on top of Chris Peterson and begins to smash fists into his face, his eyes fixing on Petersons before grabbing his head and slamming his own forehead into it. Medos comes over and attempts to break it up, but NBK, without even looking, throws him aside with one arm.

The Killer then grabs Peterson's head again, brings his own faces just a centimetre from his opponent, and screams as he squeezes Chris' head. Peterson seems stunned by this turn of events, but he is soon rescued, as Medos decides to take a more direct approach, and have launched off the top rope, and slammed an elbow into the back of NBK, causing him to roll off Peterson, who scrambles to the ropes, and The killer clutches his back. Medos drags him to his feet, lanuches him into the corner, and then follows him in with a knee strike to the head.

Peterson has groggily got to his feet and goes towards Medos, who sidesteps him and sends him into the ropes, and on the return jumps onto his shoulders for a hurricanrana, but Peterson manages to block, and turn it into a thunderous Powerbomb. Now all three men have lost momentum. Chris trying to regain some of his senses, Medos staring at the ceiling, and NBK just slumped in the corner.

Medos and Peterson stagger to their feet, Peterson quickly grabs Medos and hits The X-PLEX! But as he goes for the cover, NBK is upon him and takes him down with Rumour Has It, and then climbs over him and synches in Releasing The Screams, his modified camel clutch. He is staring deep into Peterson's eyes, but ignores the rising Medos, who breaks NBK's hold with a kick, and then hits THE BREAK THROUGH! And goes for the cover.]



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3...

Dennis: here is your winner, MMMMEEEEEEEEDDDDDOOOOOSSSS!!!

Vinegar: Impressive débuts by NBK and Peterson but Medos the one taking the win, his experience paying off.

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

“Given to Fly” hits to a show of massive support for The Aussie Revolutionary, Enigma, as he walks out to the edge of the ramp, microphone in hand. He gives a quick wave to the fans as the music dies down.

Enigma: How’re you guys doing?

The fans cheer

Enigma: As you guys know, the revolutionaries, and the rebels are both looking for new leaders, even if some don’t approve. I want to address that first.

*Enigma paces*

Enigma: Both Paul and myself discussed taking over leadership of our respective teams, however, we both decided against that for different reasons. Paul felt that he would not be able to live up to the standard set by the fucking cyclone, and I have been known to make rash decisions when pissed off, and without an entire team at my disposal, so I figured it would be best not to contrive a team for myself.

*He stops again, letting the fans react slightly*

Enigma: Now, as for the possible revolutionary leader, that will be decided by both myself, and the revolutionaries, and by you, the fans. A vote will go out after this “Audition” where you will all get a say on who should be the next leader, and as you can all se, by the fact that he’s in the ring with a ref’s shirt on, Ethan will play as the Referee for this match. Now, without further ado, the following contest is scheduled for one fall!

“Dirty Frank”

Vinegar: Well, looks like we’ll be getting a little bit of a taste of who may possibly be the newest leader, of one of the newest factions.

Lieberjosch: And they get no purse for it, either. It’s lose, win!

The funky guitar riff for Pearl Jams' "Dirty Frank" kicks into full force as Frank Biccardo struts out to the massive cheers of the fans in attendance. He stops out at the edge of the top of the ramp, and throws up a single fist, causing the Jeff Hardy-like fireworks to burst forth from behind him.

Enigma: Introducing first, from Hoboken, NJ, weighing in at 250lbs, and standing at 6’2” FRANK BICARDO!!!!

He walks down the ramp, with his arms raised. He slaps a few hands as he makes his way down to ringside, before jumping up onto the ring apron. He slingshots himself over the ropes and lands in the middle of the ring with a roll. He gets back to his feet, and raises his arms to a huge pop from the crowd.

Vinegar: A backstreet brawler by all rights! A definite contrast to the would-be leader, Enigma who is predominantly a high flyer.

Covert Jay: Not the leader, Frank is not ninjary enough.

Lieberjosch: Oh, shut up. This man’s build does show some promise.

“Waidmanns Heil”

Lieberjosch: OH HO HO! I thought the other guy was big!

Covert Jay: That’s what she said!

"Waidmanns Heil" blasts out of the speakers to a loud pop as Mark Benzin walks out to the ring. A few pressure pads are set up along the ramp, and as Mark walks past them, he throws a hard punch into them, causing large pyro explosions to burst forth out of the top of the pressure pad that has been hit.

Enigma: And introducing his opponent, from Sydney, Australia, weighing in at 300lbs and standing at 6’8” MARK BENZIN!!!

He glares at Frank, not letting his gaze affix on much else. He climbs up the stairs, and clambers up the turnbuckle glaring over the sea of fans chanting his name. He raises both arms quickly, setting off bursts of flame scattered at random locations throughout the arena.

Lieberjosch: Now THIS! This right here is the true definition of a wrestler! Big, intimidating, and not flipping around the arena.

Covert Jay: And I thought this would be a team of epic ninja proportions...

Vinegar: Both use more of a power based moveset, this should be interesting.

DING! DING!

Vinegar: Frank showing no signs of backing down and goes straight in with some stiff jabs to Marks’ sternum, both want this job, and both will fight for it.

Lieberjosch: The bigger of the two just pushes him right off, what brute force! Frank quick back up to his feet, however, and starts to circle the....One Man Firing Squad, looking for a weakness in his defence.

Vinegar: Frank going back in towards Benzin, who attempts a grapple, only to be met with a nice left hook, which stuns the bigger man, and sends him staggering into the corner.

Covert Jay: FISTS OF MOTHER FUCKIN’ FURY!!!!!

Vinegar: The Hoboken Brawler has unleashed a flurry of unrelenting jabs, now backing off and allowing for Benzin to catch a bit of air. Benzin now staggering out of the corner, as Biccardo comes bursting out with an attempted spear...

Lieberjosch: True Power! Biccardo couldn’t take Benzin down, and.... Das Hölle Tropfen!

Covert Jay: What does that even mean?

Lieberjosch: It’s German for ‘The Hell Drop’.

Vinegar: Well, whatever you call it that was a brain buster to end all brain busters!

Lieberjosch: He’s taking time with his prey, not even bothering to pin him. What a calculating wrestler! Now going over to pin Frank....

Vinegar: OH! I don’t know if that was an accident, or on purpose, but Frank just hit a low blow on Benzin while going for that roll-up! Ethan with the count...

Ethan: ONE!

TWO!

Vinegar: Kick out by Benzin. Both competitors back on their feet, as they get into a trade of punches, and you’d have to give it to the ‘Hoboken Brawler’ when it comes down to a fist fight, size aside, the name says it all. Benzin losing ground, and is sent to the corner with a hard Irish whip. Biccardo follows in, and hits Benzin with a hard jumping calf kick! Forcing the ‘One Man Firing Squad’ to slump in the corner!

Covert Jay: He’s a dancy non-ninja!

Lieberjosch: With his Boxing taunts, he’s just allowing time for Mark to recover.

Vinegar: Biccardo coming back in to get Benzin, only to be whipped into the opposite turnbuckle, by Benzin when he comes to a vertical stance. Biccardo wandering out of the corner, obviously in pain, and is met with a devastating scoop slam! Benzin now going pi pick Biccardo off the ground....

Covert Jay: NINJA STRIKE!

Vinegar: JUST END IT! BICCARDO HAS THAT DEADLY ANACONDA CROSS LOCKED IN!

Lieberjosch: Benzin showing absolute power, lifting Biccardo up, while he still holds that lock in....

Covert Jay: NINJA FORCE!

Vinegar: OUT FOR GOOD!

Lieberjosch: PIN!

Ethan: ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

DING! DING!

“Waidmanns Heil”

Enigma: The winner of Stage one, Mark Benzin! Remember, you can all vote on your favourite possible leader on UGWC.com!

Lieberjosch: God, I do hope it’s Benzin, he’s probably the only one that could compete with JK.

Vinegar: Both would make valuable additions to the locker room, what a performance from these two athletes. Mark Benzin seems like the type who shies away from the spotlight, however, he is already up to Enigma on the ramp, and hasn’t even had his arm raised in victory.

Lieberjosch: Mystery breeds suspense.

Vinegar: Stay tuned, more action coming up.

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: Huttah!

Covert Jay: Hey that's my line!

Lieberjosch: shhh the HRD is in action shortly.

Covert Jay: Huttah.

Vinegar:...

Lieberjosch: That right you just stay quiet Nick.

Vinegar:...

*Given To Fly

Dennis: From Brisbane, Australia he is Down Unders Best High Flyer...ENNNNNNNIGGGGGGMMAAAAAAAAAA!!

Enigma appears hanging from the rafters, wearing the CWA world title. As Eddie Vedder sings the line "He's flying", Enigma jumps off as if on queue and soars around the ring due to the fact that he is attached to a guy wire which allows him to gradually soar to a turnbuckle. As soon as he lands, he detaches the wire and allows it to ascend as he unhooks the title from his waist and holds it up for the crowd as cameras start going off everywhere. He then jumps down and rolls his neck before awaiting the start of the match. 

Covert Jay: This match should be very interesting seeing the Enigma Ninja and the Ninjaclone in the same ring!

Lieberjosch: It'll be interesting Jay because the HRD is involved, JK is lucky enough too be teaming with Johnny Blake, that's like being teamed up with a god after all who knows co-op action better than Johnny Blake?

Vinegar:...

*Violence Fetish

Dennis: And his partner KYYYYYYYLEEEEEEE RIIIIOOOOOTTTTT TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACKERRRRR!

Covert Jay: He held that 'A' long enough...

Kyle Tacker steps out from the back, his arms held high and his middle finger extended on both hands. He lowers his arms as he starts to walk down the ring, stopping halfway to flip the fans off some. He quickly climbs up the steel steps, and enters the ring through the second rope. He then stands in the center of the ring and raises his arms once more to flip the fans off again with both middle fingers.

Vinegar:...

Lieberjosch: The joy of silence from Nicholas is amazing.

*Jeremy

Dennis: And their opponents, first from North Queensland, Australia he is The Cyclone.... JJJAAAAAAYYYYKKKKAAAAAAAYYYYY!!

The lights flicker to green and gold as JK walks through the curtain and out onto the entrance way, to a loud chorus of booing, which seems to be emulating JK sombre mood. At this point JK holds up the Chaos Title to set of his various ring pyros. JK continues down to the ring, looking out upon the sea of former fans, with many in the front row not even holding their hands out. JK slides into the ring before climbing the turnbuckle and doing signature five finger pose/ holding up title.

Lieberjosch: Look at the stare down between JK and Enigma!

Covert Jay: NO DADDY NOOOOO!

Lieberjosch:...

Vinegar:...

Covert Jay: Well JK is basically a child and Enigma wants to beat him...

*Quick Death

Dennis: And his partner...

Lieberjosch: And here he is, the shining star in this match...JOHNNNY BLAAAAKKKKKEEE, trust the HRD to supply the excitement and talent!

Dennis:...

Johnny strides out to the ramp and heads straight down to the ring. He doesn’t run, but walks fast, fist and jaw clenched. The only thing that slows him down is a fan shouting at him causing him to kick the crowd barrier before continuing down to the ring.

Dennis:...

Lieberjosch: C'mon Mitchell do your damn job!

Dennis: You chose to interrupt me Hans!

Lieberjosch: Representing the Human Resources Department, he is one half of the UGWC Co-Operative Champions and a man everyone wishes they could be...JOHHNNNNNNYYYYY BLLLAAAAAKKKKEEE!

Dennis: You already did that!

Lieberjosch: Johnny deserves two announcements!

Vinegar: Ahem...the match has started gentlemen.

Lieberjosch: Shut up you!

Covert Jay: Indeed Enigma and Johnny Blake have started this match out as Johnny had gouged the eyes of his opponent who was going after JK.

Lieberjosch: One of the two greatest Co-Op wrestlers of all time now holds Enigma in a headlock and easily takes him down.

Covert Jay: Easily? It looked rather difficult.

Lieberjosch: That's Blake's way of making Enigma look good, the HRD are caring people. Look Johnny just let Enigma out of the hold and has fallen on his back, making Enigma think he clotheslined him.

Vinegar:...Umm...forget it I'll just keep it to myself.

Lieberjosch: You do that!

Covert Jay: Enigma sending Johnny into the corner and charges in but Blake avoids the splash and Johnny makes the tag to JK who comes in immediately with a bulldog.

Lieberjosch: Blake showing his co-op prowess and ushering JK into their corner, Johnny back in the ring and now he and JK both stomping away at Enigma.

Covert Jay: Great co-op work!

Lieberjosch: I told you JK was lucky. Enigma now sent into the ropes and Blake tosses him overhead before sliding into the cover.

East: 1...





...2...





Lieberjosch: Blake allowing Enigma to think he kicked out!

Vinegar: Sigh!

Covert Jay: Enigma though fighting to his feet and manages to hit a jawbreaker on Ballistic Johnny Blake. Enigma now trying too make the tag...

Lieberjosch: But Ballistic Blake regains his senses and trips Enigma up and drags him back to his corner to tag in JK.

Covert Jay: JK in and stomping away at Enigma before climbing out onto the ring apron...JK launches himself in too the ring by spring boarding off the ropes and punting Enigma in the head.

Vinegar: Ahem...flying debris!

East: 1...





...2...





Covert Jay: Tacker coming into the ring and breaks up the count...Enigma may have been out there.

Lieberjosch: JK now dragging Enigma into the corner to tag in Johnny...Down Under's High Flyer though breaks free and is quick to attempt to tag in Kyle.

Covert Jay: Blake into the ring...

Lieberjosch: UGWC Co-Operative Champion greatness there, knocking Kyle Tacker off the ring apron...Enigma has no one to tag in now.

Covert Jay: He doesn't need it though...Enigma suddenly strikes with the Here We Go and JKs down.

East: 1...





...2...





Lieberjosch: JK just managing to kick out and now both ninja wrestlers get to their feet.

Vinegar: Small Package!

East: 1...

Lieberjosch: Yes you do have one!

East: ...2...

Covert Jay: JK kicks out and as they get to their feet he hits a sudden snap DDT and tags in Blake.

Lieberjosch: Ballistic going to the top rope...possibly going for the Double Foot Stomp.

Covert Jay: Enigma is quick to get back to his feet though, forcing Blake too go for a crossbody...

Lieberjosch: Ouch!

Vinegar: Ouch indeed!

Covert Jay: DESSSSPAAAARRRRRAAAADDDOOOOOO!

Lieberjosch: Enigma gets lucky and catches Blake with a buzzsaw kick coming in.

Covert Jay: Enigma quickly tags in Tacker who comes in and knocks JK off the apron before suplexing Blake.

Lieberjosch: Its a strategy from Blake!

Covert Jay: That stomp to the ribs is a painful strategy...I hope its worth it.

Lieberjosch: It will be...just you wait!

Covert Jay: Tacker now planting Blake with a big time Death Valley Driver and into the cover.

East: 1...





...2...





Covert Jay: JK saves the match for his partner but Kyles quick to his feet and clotheslines the Cyclone to the outside.

Lieberjosch: Tacker turning his attention back to Blake...getting into a three point stance...charging in for a clothesline.

Covert Jay: Denied!

Lieberjosch: Blake sidesteps and takes him down with a gutbuster that looks quite painful.

Vinegar: Quite painful? You guys are terrible without me!

Covert Jay: Silence mute Ninja.

Lieberjosch: You better not talk during the beard shaving.

Vinegar: DDT countered by Tacker into a suplex.

Covert Jay: if you talk during the beard shaving we'll shave you!

Vinegar: Mrs. Vinegar would love that...she said last time its like trying to find tree surrounded by shrubbery...

Lieberjosch:...

Covert Jay:...

Dennis:...

Audience:...

Jet Somers Momma:...

Vinegar: Ahem guys the match is still under way.

Lieberjosch: So will every UGWC fans psychiatric session after tonight's Synergy.

Covert: Tacker followed the suplex on Blake up with one on JK but was then hit with another gut buster which is how we find ourselves with Blake squeezing Tacker's ribs tightly in a bearhug.

Vinegar: Tacker though fighting against it with a few punches, which rocks Johnny Blake backwards...

Lieberjosch: JK back on the canvas, and he leans out and slaps Blakes back for the blind tag, and climbs to the top rope...

Vinegar: Just as a final fist from Tacker forces Blake to break the hold and drop to his knee's...

Lieberjosch: FLYING DEBRIS FROM the TOP ROPE!

Vinegar: JK covering as Blake rushes Enigma...


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3!!!

Dennis: Here are your Winners, JJJJAAAAAYYYY KAAAAYYYYY AND JJJJOOOOOHHHNNNYYYY BBBBLLLLAAAAAAKKKEEEE!!!

Vinegar: Some great action on display there, lets see what's up next!

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Lieberjosch: So let me get this straight, despite not being official members of the roster, these blake brothers not only got to be referees at a PPV, but now they are deemed worthy of stepping itno the ring with The lord himself?

Vinegar: I'm not sure what the thinking is behind this match up, but it seems before Hastings is put up against Chris Peterson they're going to send out the rest of The Dragon's Cave to soften him up first.

Lieberjosch: That sounds like the plan of a super villain, a flawed plan, but still hideously super villain-esque. In fact, in that wheelchair, orchestrating things at Day of Reckoning, he did look like a comic book super villain.

Vinegar: He's just protecting a student. It would be reckless of him to throw him straight into a match with Hastings, he's a multiple World Champion in Multiple Companies, it would be a highly stupid move.

Lieberjosch: They should have thought about that before playing mind games with the Lord Chief.

Vinegar: Lets go over to Dennis for the introductions.

[And go over to Dennis we do. And he introduces Trent West who is accompanied by Brett West. Both men walk down to the ring, and Trent climbs in with Brett lingering around his corner. Then Donovan comes out, and as he walks down to the ring he just shakes his head at the sight before him, clearly not impressed. He climbs into the ring and disrobes. The referee then calls for the ring.

Donovan patronizingly walks around Trent West, looking him up and down with his hand on his chin, as if he were some exhibit. He then steps into the middle of the ring, and points to his face whilst leaning forward. He is giving Trent West a free shot. Trent looks over to his brother who shrugs, then back at Hastings and raises his eyebrows, as Hastings nods urging him to strike. Trent mimicks his brothers shrug, then winds up his right hand, and then swings his right arm at hastings Jaw, and when it connects the force lifts Hastings off his feet, and lands him on his back looking at the lights.

Trent now walks around Hastings with his own hand on his chin mocking the former UGWC World Heavyweight Champion, rather than going for a pinfall, but Hastings gets to his feet and shakes himself off, and repeats the gesture, giving Trent the opportunity at yet another free shot. The West brothers look at each other in amazement, Hastings is clearly still stunned from the first strike, and he is playing directly into Trent's strengths. Despite both looking big and dumb, even the Wests know not to look a gift horse in the mouth, and this time Trent unleashes a left handed Haymaker, which sends Hastings to the floor once more, this time he spins 180 degree's and lands on his face.

Trent and Brett just look at one another in amusement, it's unlikely either expectign thigns to start so easily. Donovan drags himself across the ring, and back to his knee's and then back to his feet using the ropes to help him back up. He staggers around as Trent just stands chucklign to himself, as Donovan weaves back into the middle of the ring, and inexpicably he points to his chin and face once more. Brian Chartreuse is even becoming worried by this and he steps in and tries to talk Donovan out of his bizarre actions, but Donovan just pushes him away and looks Trent dead in the eyes, willing him to strike once more. Trent looks at him, his face full of pity and he shakes his head, before he unloads with a right...

But this time Hastings is ready, and he moves an inch to the side, grabs Trents arm, forcing him face first into the canvas, and then locks in a painful armbar, and really stretches it. And in a matter of moments Trent West realises he is in the middle of the ring, with no way to escape and no formal wrestling training, he takes a moment to consider how important his right arm is to him, and then taps out.]

Dennis: Here is your winner, DOOOOOOONNNNNOOOOVVVVAAAAANNNN HHHHHAAAAASSSSTTTTIIIINNNGGGGSSSS!!!

Vinegar: That was an unorthodox strategy.

Lieberjosch: Yet it worked, Hastings is a genius.

Vinegar: He may have lost a fair few braincells during that one.

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: Next up we've got the Current Chaos Champion, taking on the Number 1 Contender to the UGWC World Heavyweight Championship. Tyvola vs Ezekiel, a clash in styles, but both men are adept at their own techniques.

Lieberjosch: As much as I'd love to debate the finer points of this match with you, could you hurry along?

Vinegar: Do you have somewhere to be?

Covert Jay: It's the Beard Shaving after this dummy! Just let the recap begin.

Vinegar: Really? Another one?

[Despite Vinegar's astonishment this match is yet another to be recapped. Ezekiel is the first to make his way to the ring, and he looks like a shadow of the man we saw at No Holds Barred, his eyes are sunken, and he looks as though he has not slept in days. Tyvola on the other hand just looks like he hasn't washed in weeks, and his entrance contains nothing noteworthy at this time.

Both men get in the ring, and with no obvious animosity between the two, apart from Tyvola's usual hatred of anything breathing that stands in his way of some disturbed utopia, they both stand patiently and wait for the bell to ring. And when it does, Ezekiel does his best to avoid Tyvola, spending the first exchanges dodging, ducking and rolling from the Hardcore Hermit's advances, doing his best to use his speed to create an opening or wear Tyvola down. He;s a big man, and they tend to tire after a few minutes of relentless chasing.

Tyvola however wises up to this eventually, and then stands dead in the centre of the ring. Which stops Zeke in his tracks, as now his game plan has been undone. If the Homicidal Hobo doesn't attempt to strike, Zeke cannot dodge. After a few seconds, he realises he'll have to do the striking, and he runs against the ropes, and hits a spinning heel kick, but it only makes Tyvola step backwards a few steps. Zeke quickly gets back to his feet and unleashes a number of high flying moves, each with a similar result, until on one last attempt when Ty catches him and then hits a T-Bone Suplex, throwing Zeke into the turnbuckle on the release.

Tyvola picks up Ezekiel's body and then over the next minute or so does what can only be described as abusing the stunned man's body. Gorrilla Presses, back breakers, and a pile driver all delivered in quick succession, leave Ezekiel almost destroyed when Tyvola makes the cover]




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2....





[It's a real 1, 2, OOOoooh! Moment, as Zeke at the very last moment manages to get his shoulder up. Tyvola scowls and gets to his feet, he clearly wants this match finished as quickly as Jay and Lieberjosch, he stomps to his feet and then turns, waiting for Zeke to stagger to his feet. When he does he whips him into the corner and follows in with an avalanche. But Zeke at the last moment moves, and Tyvola's head smashes into the turnbuckle and he staggers backwards, Zeke with great reactions hits IN GOD'S NAME! And falls on top of Tyvola for the cover]




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2...




[Tyvola kicks out at the last moment and both men are down on the floor, strugglingt o their feet. Once on their feet, Tyvola swings out at Ezekiel, but Zeke manages to duck, and hit a springboard knee strike to Ty's head, sending the big man down once more. Zeke then climsb to the top rope and jumps for the EYE OPENER!

Ty rolls out of the way at the last moment and Zeke's knee's slam into the mat and he screams out in pain as he rolls onto his back clutching at them, Tyvola gets to his feet, drags Zeke up, and Hit's THE BORDER TOSS and goes for the cover.]










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2....






[And to the amazement of the fans Ezekiel manages to get his foot onto the rope, and Tyvola is forced to break the cover. He manhandles Zeke to his feet, but Zeke out of desperation raises a Knee sending Tyvola stumbling backwards, he then runs the ropes, and goes for a clothesline, but it's Tyvola is the oen to duck this time, and then hits MAGUS out of nowhere. And covers.]






1...










2....











3!!!

Dennis: Here is your winner, TTTTTYYYYYYYVVVVVOOOOLLLLAAAA!

Vinegar: Tyvola emerges victorious from a hard fought match, Ezekiel put on a hell of a...


Covert Jay: blah, blah, blah. THE BEARD GETS SHAVED NEXT!

Lieberjosch: And it better NOT be Recapped!

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Vinegar: Wow, are we really doing this?

Lieberjosch: Of course. A stipulation is a stipulation.

Covert Jay: And a sexy stipulation is sexy.

Vinegar: Et tu, Brute?

Lieberjosch: Well if you believe the hype the brute might just take a taste while he's down there.

Dennis: Ladies and gentlemen. Jet Somers by cashing in a portion of his total won purse before Day of Reckoning added a stipulation to the Number One Contenders match. Stating that the winner must shave the 'beard' of the loser.

Mitchell Dennis is silenced by the very vocal live crowd. He gives them a few moments before continuing.

Lieberjosch: Lowest common denominator, folks.

Dennis: So without further ado, the man who's fault all this is. Jjjjeeeeeeeeeeeeee/

Dennis is stopped by the frantic waving of a stage hand sprinting down the ramp. He gets to ringside, and Mitchell walks over to converse. As the ruckus crowd quiets to low hum the camera catches a glimpse of the announcers 'what the fuck kind of bullshit is this' expression.

Dennis: Folks, I'm being told that Jet Somers will not witness his creation. Something about 'having his reasons'.

Vinegar: I guess he figured Gabrielle would win, and I hope he's to ashamed to show his face for forcing a woman to come out in front of a record setting most watched edition of Synergy and bare all.

Covert Jay: Very ninja of him. I guess. I hope?

Lieberjosch: He's probably afraid that without the title belt he wouldn't be able to hide his erection. This is absolutely shameful.

Vinegar: Have you thought that possibly there might actually be a very good reason why he's not out here? Do we even know if he's going to be able to compete in tonight's main event?

Covert Jay: Yeah, a very ninja reason!

The abundance of cheers quiets down as the news sets in, and Mitchell Dennis is free to continue as he passes by the stir-up equipped medical examiners table.

Dennis: Coming out first. Representing the Human Resources Department. Gabrielle Madison Montgomery!


'What You Want' slinks into existence as all the arena lighting turns purple and pink as what we want walks out atop the entrance way. Looking nervous wearing a lavender satin robe Gabrielle is quickly joined by Ole' Bob, Boss P, Travis Pierce, and the Thames Valley Hit Squad. Gabby takes a deep gulp as she watches Old Bob and Boss P head down the ramp first. She follows hesitantly as Travis Pierce, Duncan, and Blake fall in line.

At ringside, Duncan quickly hopes up the apron, and holds open the bottom and middle rope for the Caramel Goddess. Blake watches as she enters the ring with a disapproving glare before the rest of the HRD join her inside. Once Gabby's inside she sees the table, and attempts to pull her robe even more closed as the cameras start to the shake from the noise the absolutely crazed fans are making. Pierce takes a stop in the far corner with the UGWC title belt worn snuggly over his ring gear. Ryder tries his best to take up a view directly in the center of the table before Blake urges him with a shove to the other corner. And Old Bob with Boss P can be seen reassuring the Epitome of Beauty that everything's going to be alright.

Vinegar: I think I'm going to be sick. Look at her. She clearly doesn't want to go through with this!

Covert Jay: Than why is she?

Lieberjosch: Yeah, that's a 'ninja' for you. Listen, she's going through with it because that's the stipulation! A lot of folks apparently don't understand, especially the ones that write blogs, that when you play this little game of ours there are certain things that are just unacceptable. Very few I'll admit, but damnit they are concrete. And backing out of a stipulation is one of those things.

Vinegar: Yeah, but this isn't a stipulation she agreed to! This was forced on her and Tyvola by then champion Jet Somers!

Covert Jay: Yeah, and it's clear he's having second thoughts. So maybe the ninja thing to do is just call it all off.

Lieberjosch: If by ninja you mean bitch move than I'll agree. Fact is fact. The stip was that the loser gets shaved. She lost. She's about to be shaved.

Vinegar: So you agree with what's about to happen?

Lieberjosch: Hell no! I think only a complete tool would even suggest such stakes. It's nothing more than a cry for attention. A, "Hey look at me I have a personality too!" desperate attempt to garner some kind of fleeting spot light. No, I think what we are about to witness is going to go down as one of the darkest days not only in the UGWC but all of Professional... ah Sports Entertainment. In all of my years I have never been so frustratingly embarrassed by one mans actions.

Gabby after some coaxing from Old Bob takes her seat on the table, tucks her robe between her legs, and places her heels into the stir-ups while she leans back.

Dennis: And the...

Vinegar: And he looks pissed!

Covert Jay: Storming the gates here comes Tyvola.

'Come Together'

Tyvola is already halfway to the ring by the time his music hits. He wastes no time stepping up onto the apron, and then over the top rope. With purpose in his stride he makes for Gabby's position, and is stopped when Duncan Ryder hands him a straight razor and can of Barbasol while he wears a shit eating grin. The scowl from Tyvola is enough to make Duncan take a few steps back before he motions that if the Jackal of Jwar Isle doesn't want to do it, Dashing Duncan Ryder would be willing.

Gabby watches as a Tyvola looks around. He seems a bit overwhelmed by the atmosphere and barrage of unintelligible noise coming from the stands. She closes her eyes, lays her head back, Tyvola throws the can of shaving creaming into the stands, snarls at Ryder and...

The GlobalTron suddenly comes on, interrupting the festivities.

We see a darkened set, with silhouettes visible of a table with a couch alongside it. A voiceover is heard from Rob Cartwright.

Cartwright: Ladies and gentlemen, the host of The Piercing Truth, you know his name, TRAVIS PIERCE!

“You Know My Name” by Chris Cornell begins to play, and the lights come on to show a chair sitting backwards behind the desk. A monitor behind the chair shows the logo for The Piercing Truth. The chair spins around to reveal... Jet Somers!! Jet looks directly at the camera as he presses stop on the recording playing the generic TPT opening.

Somers: Good evening, and welcome to a very special edition of The Piercing Truth! My name is Jet Somers, and as the special guest with the second most appearances on The Piercing Truth, I've decided as a special correspondent to bring you this edition as host! So let's kick it off with Top Stories!

Jet switches to Camera B.

Somers: Casey Heynes is the name on everyone's lips, the bully victim who became an internet hero by silencing his tormentors with a brutal defense, and walking away like a real man with his head held high! Other emulators on the internet include Jet Somers, who threw down and defeated would be bully Travis Pierce no less than three times at Day of Reckoning, forcing a desperate Robert Ooley to make up the rules of the Napolean's Revenge match on the spot to protect his struggling protege. Despite eventually having to hand over the title, Jet Somers walks away with his head up, knowing Pierce couldn't have defeated him in a straight up match.

Jet switches to Camera A.

Somers: US forces continue their attempt to remove Libyan dictator Muammar Muhammad al-Gaddafi and assist the Libyan uprising. Sources tell me that Jet Somers has only just begun his uprising against dictator Robert Ooley and his regime.

Jet switches to Camera B.

Somers: The latest video to go viral is of twins Brendan and Mark discussing in their own language whether a missing sock is indeed stuck in a freezer. Experts say their language is far easier to translate than the usual spat between Duncan Ryder and Johnny Blake.

Jet switches to Camera B.

Somers: That's all the time we have this week, Truthites, but remember! It’s not my fault that the truth…hurts.

Jet hits play on the recording, and “You Know My Name” plays again as we fade out returning to the live feed in the ring.

Lieberjosch: What in Gods name was that bullshit! That was the 'has his reasons'! Some pathetic little attempt to steal segment?

Covert Jay: Not real ninja. Could have been a ninja way to open the show though!

Vinegar: I'm not watching this. Get me when the main event starts.

Vinegar stands up and walks away from ringside as all in the ring stand dumbfounded, except for Pierce who smiles towards Ooley and can be seen mouthing 'I was right. Cheap knockoff.', and the audience has fallen silent.

Lieberjosch: That was a bitch move if I've ever seen one. Here's an idea. I'm a pathetic lame duck champion, I'll probably lose my belt, but just incase I don't let me grief either of the people that are about to be named number one contender. But not only that, but then I'm gonna hide in the back because oh shit my forced stip just put a god damned razor blade in the hands of a retard and I might get a little boo boo for sticking my nose in where it doesn't belong. This is reason one why everyone important to Somers, everyone he's ever leeched onto, has either abandoned him or turned on him. Guy's a piece of shit, and I can only assume...

Covert Jay: IN COMING!

Lieberjosch: Boss P trying to move this segment along started tugging on the robe of Gabrielle, and received a punt from Tyvola for his efforts.

Covert Jay: And now that table!

Boss P after getting kicked out of the ring is shown a close up look of panic as Tyvola pulls the still covered Gabrielle off the table before hurling the metal construct over the rope crashing no more than a foot from the waddling as fast as his little legs can penguin.

Lieberjosch: The Bearded Bastard still has that razor!

Old Bob drops to the canvas, rolls to the outside, and pulls Gabby out of the ring. He hands her a small bag containing her ring gear as the TVHS approach but are held at bay by the razor wielding Homicidal Hermit.

*CLACKCLACKCLACKCLACKCLACK*

Lieberjosch: Pierce has a tazer!

Covert Jay: He's not falling though.

Tyvola's muscles uncontrollably stiffen as he loses the ability to move. He fights and manages to turn around enough to see Pierce still squeezing the trigger on the tazer at the other end of the two metallic barbs stuck in his back.

Lieberjosch: The Truth Hurts! Tyvola's leveled! Where the hell is our play by play guy! Vinegar get out here.

Gabrielle quickly pulled her shorts and top on, and was stopped by Ooley as she tried to get into the ring. Ooley can be seen telling her, 'Bummers did this. We got our numbers, now you make him pay!' before barking for the TVHS to get the unconscious Tyvola out of ring side.

Covert Jay: Wait, so no sexy stipulation?

Vinegar: Alright, now that that's over I'm back just in time to see Tyvola being drug to the back. Which leaves us Travis Pierce, Gabrielle, and Old Bob at ringside. I have no idea where Boss P fled too, but it looks like Dennis is about ready for the introductions to the main event.

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Dennis: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a Cooperative Match scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, representing the Human Resources Department, Gabrielle Montgomery and the World Heavyweight Champion, TRAVIS PIERRRRCCEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Lieberjosch: What took you so long, I thought I was going to have to call the match?

Vinegar: Yeah, you think you couldn’t handle it?

Lieberjosch: I’d hate for them to realize they don’t need you.

A silhouette resembling Jet Somers appears in the distance of a darkened hallway, walking toward the screen. A distorted and distant Mark Collie wails: 'In time, your time will be no more...,' and the vertical control suddenly flips out as Nonpoint's "Everybody Down" hits hard and Jet runs out from behind the curtain. He runs to the edge of the stage and pumps his fist in the air a few times. At 'And when I stomp you' Jet sprints down the ramp, slapping hands in the crowd as he goes, and he stops at the bottom, staring directly at Robert Ooley.

Dennis: And their opponents, introducing first, The Wild Card, JET SOMERRRRRRSSSS!!!!

Vinegar: Travis Pierce appears to be laughing at Somers, I’m not sure it’s a good idea to be poking a beast like that.

Covert Jay: Why not, he already tazed the bearded one.

Lieberjosch: He’s laughing because Jet Somers just embarrassed himself with that poor man’s rip-off of The Piercing Truth that we saw just a few moments ago.

Covert Jay: I’m also not sure why he thought interrupting the shaving would endear himself with this crowd.

Vinegar: I thought that Jet was making an entertaining retort and response to the recent actions of Pierce and the rest of the Human Resources Department.

Lieberjosch: Which is why you’re on play-by-play and not doing color analysis.

“Phucking Phreak” hits, and Phrixus Deimos slinks out from backstage.

Dennis: And his cooperative partner, The Embodiment of Fear, PHRIXUS DEIIIIIMOOOOSSS!!!!!

Vinegar: Somers waiting for his partner, now rushing to the ring!

Lieberjosch: Deimos still in no hurry.

Vinegar: Meanwhile Somers in the ring with Pierce, we are under way!

DING DING!

Vinegar: And Somers tackles Pierce right to the mat!

Covert Jay: Ground and Pound!

Vinegar: Glenn Burke ushering Gabrielle out of the ring as Somers piles on the rights and lefts.

Lieberjosch: There’s a lot of pent up frustration being unleashed here, Somers has likely been stewing for two weeks about his loss at Day of Reckoning.

Vinegar: Pierce manages to push him off, crawling towards his corner, but Somers leaps right back onto him.

Covert Jay: Anaconda!

Vinegar: Pierce struggling in that submission hold, Somers applying the pressure!

Lieberjosch: But Pierce gets an arm loose and elbows him off, great ring awareness by our new champion!

Vinegar: And Pierce rolls and makes the tag to Gabrielle!

Lieberjosch: She comes into the ring right into the Kao Loi!

Vinegar: Pierce has rolled to the outside to recover.

Covert Jay: Ninja strike!

Vinegar: Somers just dove through the ropes and tackled Pierce on the outside!

Lieberjosch: Somers stomping away on Pierce, but he’s not the legal man! Somers needs to get back in the ring!

Vinegar: Glenn Burke telling him exactly that, and Somers rolls in and makes a tag to Deimos.

Lieberjosch: And Somers rolls right back to the outside, he’s supposed to go to his corner!

Vinegar: Somers continuing the assault on Pierce, meanwhile in the ring Deimos pulls Montgomery into a snap suplex, floats right into a cover.




ONE!!!




TWO!!!




Vinegar: Montgomery kicks out!


Lieberjosch: Deimos pulling Gabrielle up, whips her into the corner, runs into a reverse elbow!

Covert Jay: And a Decadent DDT!

Vinegar: Somers still beating down Pierce at ringside.

Covert Jay: TYVOLA!

Lieberjosch: Where did he come from?

Vinegar: Tyvola came out of the crowd, he’s behind Somers, what’s that?

Lieberjosch: He’s still got the razor!

Vinegar: HOLY HELLISH HOPSCOTCH!!!!

Lieberjosch: Tyvola just slashed Jet’s arm with that razor!

Vinegar: Pierce grabs the tazor again!

Lieberjosch: But Ooley is obstructing his path with his bat!

Vinegar: Ooley gesturing for Pierce to go back to the corner, meanwhile, Montgomery springing to the turnbuckle!

Lieberjosch: Split-legged moonsault!

Vinegar: But she folds her knees in mid-air, lands with both on the top rope!

Covert Jay: She’s smiling, shaking her head no to the crowd.

Lieberjosch: No split???

Vinegar: And now a double knee drop to Deimos!

Lieberjosch: As Tyvola kicks Somers down on the outside, and leaves him bleeding from that gash on the arm!

Vinegar: Montgomery tags Pierce in, World Champion into the ring.

Lieberjosch: Ooley pointing the bat at Somers on the outside!

Vinegar: Glenn Burke leaning through the ropes, telling Ooley not to do anything to Somers!

Lieberjosch: Tyvola into the ring!

Covert Jay: MAGUS!!!!!

Vinegar: Tyvola just laid out Pierce with the Magus, Tyvola out of the ring, Ooley staring at him now.

Lieberjosch: Deimos on the turnbuckle!

Covert Jay: METEOR PRESS!!!!!

Vinegar: Deimos has the cover!




ONE!!!!!




TWO!!!!!




THREE!!!!!




Dennis: Here are your winners, JET SOMERS AND PHRIXUS DEIIIIIIMOOOOOSSS!!!!!

Vinegar: Deimos and Somers pick up the victory here tonight!

Lieberjosch: But there can be no doubt that Tyvola has left his mark on all the competitors in this match.

Vinegar: And he will meet Travis Pierce for the World Championship, just a few weeks away, at No Holds Barred! We’ll see you next week!

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

Credits

Recapped Stuff
T-Rob

Aussie Revolutionaries Stage 1 Match
Enigma with JK's help.

Coop Match
DJS

Beard Shaving
Tyvola with contribution from Ichy.

Main Event
Donovan

[T-Robosaurus Rex]

It is what it is.

I have not proofed or read anyone's contributions so will leave feedz at a later date. Butt hanks for the contributions, it makes the process a lot easier. And sorry for the miscommunication this week.

OK nearly 3 am, bed for me.

[EZRA]

Like you said, it is what it is. Even for a recap, the match were decent. Shit happens and no ones perfect. Here's to next week kicking ass.

EDIT: I know it loses it's effect due to recapping, but here is a special entrance I had planned. It was sent to JK when he said he was able to write the match. No worries but here it is.

---

‘Chorus of Angels’ hits the PA System but instead of Ezekiel, we see Scarlet walk out onto the ramp with a microphone in her hand.

Scarlet: Ladies and gentlemen, due to events that happened earlier in the week, Ezekiel will no longer be using this music to bring him down to the ring. So, I introduce to you.. The Iron Man, Ezekiel Pax!

A steady drum beat begins as the lights strobe to follow the beat. After a moment, a guitar riff sears through the drum beat as a robotic voice says ‘I.. Am.. Iron.. Man’. The guitar riff hits again as the drums continue. The guitar picks up more heavily as the beginning of ‘Iron Man’ by Black Sabbath kicks into full gear. Ezekiel walks out on the ramp with his head covered by a hooded jacket. Scarlet sets down the microphone and follows her man down the ramp. Ezekiel stops about halfway down the ramp and takes a knee. He puts his arms out and shoulder height as pyros start to go off starting at the top of the ramp. His arms move higher as the pyro continues going down the ramp. As it reaches him he thrusts his arms downward and pulls hood off.

Covert: What the hell? That isn’t Zeke.

Vinegar: That’s where you’re wrong, Jay. It appears that Ezekiel is back to the way he looked BEFORE he was resurrected.

Ezekiel smirks as he jumps onto the apron. He scales the turnbuckle from the outside and puts his arms out. He jumps down and lands inside the ring. He stands dead center of the squared circle as Scarlet stands behind him. Again, he puts his arms out and she grabs the shoulders of his jacket and pulls it off. A collective gasp comes over the crowd as Ezekiel slowly turns, showing horrible marks from where his wings had been ripped off. He smiles somewhat sinisterly as he removes the Chaos Title from around his waist and hands it to Owen Peterson.

[Jet Somers]

Ya know, sometimes Lieberjosch hurts my feelings :-P

Oh well, loved the main event, and the cooperative match was awesome. Good work for a recap show.

[Jason Tacker]

Gotta agree w/ Jet on the show. Main event & co-op were the highlights & it was good for a recap show... Can't really add much more due to typing on my phone.

[Sheena Ramone]

it was great for what it was.
hope people enjoyed the Revolutionaries segment, my first match ever written (Hence I got Jordans help with it), so hope I didn't screw anything up.