Post by Lord Hastings on Aug 15, 2011 20:42:10 GMT -5
Earlier today:
One by one, various members of the hierarchy of UGWC staff file out of
the arena dutifully. Lowly janitors, ring technicians, A/V experts, vendors,
and the like march into the parking lot, most of them smoking them (if they
have them), and treating this like an unexpected break before the big show.
In one corner of the parking lot, removed from the underpaid rabble, the
Consortium stand making various reactions to this development. Hope
Paulson busily examines a desktop size dayplanner, reading appointments
off to Moss Edwards. Intern Todd hastily scratches his fingertips across the
surface of his Ipad screen while Robert Ooley twists Louis in his hands
impatiently. Dexter Vines simply vociferates into his cell phone at an
ever-increasing volume. Clearly, whatever is going on is unexpected.
Janitor A: A fumigation? On a Monday?
Janitor B: Something about unwanted pests living in the bowels of the
arena.
Janitor A: I wish we’d been told about this. I just waxed the serving lines in
Concourse 12.
Janitor B: I was in the break room, watching a recap of the Saints and 49ers.
Janitor A: You watch the preseason? Who watches the preseason?
The din of the crowd lessens palpably when the members of the Circle
begin their exit, accompanying their master in a protective ring.
Janitor A: Creepy lot, that.
Janitor B: I’ll say. I bet they watch the preseason.
Janitor A: Dude. No one watches the preseason.
A rumble, crash, and guttural roar announces the forcible removal of the
World Heavyweight Champion from the arena, and to everyone’s surprise,
he is handcuffed to a thick rail tie behind his back. Regardless, he manages
to swing it with enough leverage to gut check a couple of security guards
before someone tranqs him, and seven or so crew members drag him out
of sight behind the dumpsters.
Everyone mills around a bit, but something suddenly feels off.
Janitor A: Hey, what’s the count on A/V guys lately?
Janitor B: Sixteen, but they mess up like thirty. Why?
Janitor A: Unless we hired some new guys this week, somebody got their
uniforms mixed up. There’s twenty three of them.
The Janitors take a moment to recount, but one stops suddenly.
Janitor B: That’s Sheena Ramone…
Before his associate can pick her out, seven of the ‘new’ A/V staff reach
beneath their UGWC ball caps and pull down cloths to cover their faces. On
each cloth is a hastily rendered drawings of Prince Rudo’s mask.
Janitor A: Oh, crap.
Eyes glance back and forth like a tennis match for a few moments, waiting
for Prince Rudo to notice this mockery. Hope Paulson is the first to see it,
however, and she clears her throat enough for all three members of the
Consortium to look up, first at her, then at the masks. Everyone’s gaze is
locked on the seven covered faces, except Paulson’s, who is trying
impossibly to read the reaction of said Prince.
He is watching.
Convinced they have his attention, each of the disguised demonstrators
reveals from behind them a paintbrush dripping with black paint. And, as one, each of them paints a swath across the caricatures depicting the prince.
The Consortium tenses, the unnamed other staff members back away quickly, and the demonstrators stare directly at the Circle.
Suddenly an explosion from inside, a cloud of curses, and a billow of white insecticide breaks up the tension. When the toxic mist clears, everyone has scattered to escape the noxious fumes, and the demonstrators are gone.
Vinegar: Welcome, one and all, to UGWC Synergy!
Covert Jay: Huttah!
Vinegar: We are just a week away from Outlast, and I don't know about you, but I can't wait!
Lieberjosch: Tyvola will face the biggest challenge of his World Title reign, as he must defend against the entire promotion!
Vinegar: Our six captains have been forming their teams, still some selections yet to be made, we hope to have all that information for you by the end of the night, but first, let's get to the action!
"You Know My Name" hits as the stage pyros explode, and as the music softens Travis Pierce emerges from backstage and walks down the ramp to the ring.
Dennis: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, representing the Human Resources Department, TRAVIS PIEEEERRRRRCCCCCEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Vinegar: Travis Pierce got back on the winning track last week, beating three others. We'll see if he can continue on that path tonight, against five.
Lieberjosch: Poppycock, what's really opportunity is that he gets things together for next week so he doesn't let the Human Resources Department down yet again.
"Headstrong" plays, and two spotlights aim to the top of the ramp as Steven Stone walks out. He looks around the arena, smiles before looking to the ring. The smile goes from his face as he reaches the ring. He rolls in before taking a deep breath to calm his nerves.
Dennis: Introducing next, the Prodigy, STEVEN STOOOOOOONNNEEEEE!!!!
Vinegar: Stone picked up his first victory here in UGWC last week.
Lieberjosch: He managed to look like a fluke winning over Savana of all people.
Covert Jay: A former Cross-Hemisphere Champion, I'd point out.
Lieberjosch: You would.
"How to Make a Monster" plays as the Natural Born Killer stalks to the ring.
Dennis: Introducing next, he is the reigning Chaos Champion, the NATURALLL BORRNN KILLLLERRRRRR!!!!
Vinegar: We know already that NBK will be a member of Team Hastings at Outlast.
Lieberjosch: He's a hired gun, and that's a role he's certain to be fantastic at.
"Dying Breed" hits over the PA system as Kyle Tacker steps out from the back, his arms held high and his middle finger extended on both hands. He lowers his arms as he starts to walk down the ring, stopping halfway to flip the fans off some. He quickly climbs up the steel steps, and enters the ring through the second rope. He then stands in the center of the ring and raises his arms once more to flip the fans off again with both middle fingers, and turns and stares at Pierce.
Dennis: And now entering the ring, the One Man Riot, KYLE TACKERRRR!!!!!
Vinegar: We understand there is bad blood between Pierce and Tacker, going back several years.
Lieberjosch: Kyle Tacker packs quite a punch, he could make a real impact next week for his team.
Vinegar: Thank you for entirely ignoring the details I was expositing.
Lieberjosch: Nothing about Pierce matters until he starts doing his job again.
Strobe lights start up, right about the time that the music hits, hard and fast and heavy as Shiner starts playing. Smoke has filled the floor of the stage and then she bursts through it, heading straight for the ring. She walks swiftly and with purpose and jumps up on the ring, grabbing the top rope and flipping herself into the ring over the top rope.
Dennis: Now entering the ring, making her UGWC debut, ABIGAIL KNIGHT!!!!
Vinegar: Abigail Knight finally making her debut, we expected it a couple weeks ago, delayed until tonight, hopefully worth the wait.
Covert Jay: Abby Knight is known as the Devil's Daughter, she's quite a firecracker, this is exciting.
Lieberjosch: Word is that Miss Knight will be a part of Team Hastings at Outlast.
Vinegar: Speaking of which, hold on a second, Owen Peterson is on the stage!
Covert Jay: It's megaphone time!
Peterson: Yo hold on just uh second down dere, Mitchell. Ah gots dis here covered, so you keep yo' mouf shut.
Dennis: Whatever.
Peterson: Introducing, uh key member o' Team Niggalicious, da Black Knight, CHRIS PEEEEDERRRRSONNNNN!
Vinegar: Chris Peterson on the stage, appears to be wearing a tin garbage can lid on his head.
Covert Jay: It's his helmet!
Vinegar: ...and holding a wooden sword.
Covert Jay: Well, every knight needs a sword!
Lieberjosch: Chris Peterson, clearly embracing the teaching of the Lord.
Vinegar: Chris Peterson, clearly embarassed seems more like it.
Lieberjosch: Don't forget that Chris picked up the win for his team last night, able to overcome having to team with Jet Somers, he accomplished it with the support of Lord Hastings, you would have never seen Chris Peterson be able to do that a month ago.
Vinegar: Owen has gone backstage, Chris Peterson entering the ring now.
Lieberjosch: The Natural Born Killer snatches the lid off his head, and he smacks Stone with it!
Covert Jay: See? Teammates working together already.
DING DING!
Vinegar: Hazel East is going to have a lot of trouble keeping order in this match, which finally gets underway, NBK snuck that foreign object attack in before the bell.
Lieberjosch: He's the Chaos Champion, he knows how and when to use weapons.
Vinegar: Kyle Tacker goes right after Pierce.
Covert Jay: But he's cut off by Knight, who knocks him down with a missile dropkick.
Vinegar: And the Natural Born Killer knocks Pierce down with a clothesline.
Lieberjosch: Keep in mind that three of the six people in this match are going to be on the same team next week at Outlast.
Vinegar: And two of them are probably completely unbalanced.
Covert Jay: That's not nice to say about Chris Peterson, he's in a tough spot.
Vinegar: I wasn't talking about him.
Lieberjosch: NBK dropping a knee on Pierce, Knight stomping away on Tacker!
Vinegar: And Chris Peterson is just leaning back in a corner, watching the two of them!
Lieberjosch: See? Hastings as taught him well.
Vinegar: I think he's trying to figure out how to cope with having to team with these two, as Stone is coming back into the ring.
Covert Jay: He's got his mask on!
Vinegar: Peterson takes Stone by the arm, twists into a hammerlock.
Covert Jay: But Stone counters right into the Prodigy Exception!
Vinegar: Stone knocks a charging Knight down with a right hand!
Lieberjosch: Now one for NBK!
Covert Jay: He's on fire!
Vinegar: Stone takes down Knight with an arm drag that sends her sprawing out of the ring.
Lieberjosch: Now hits an enziguri kick on NBK!
Vinegar: Stone going to the top rope, steadies himself on the turnbuckle, leaps for splash!
Lieberjosch: But Kyle Tacker steps in the way and catches him!
Covert Jay: FALL IN!!!
Vinegar: A fall away slam by Tacker, Pierce grabs him!
Lieberjosch: Breakdown!
Vinegar: Pierce covers!
ONE!!!
Vinegar: Chris Peterson breaks it up!
Lieberjosch: Pierce to his feet, swings for a clothesline!
Vinegar: Peterson ducks it!
Covert Jay: Chop block!
Vinegar: Peterson grabs him by the leg!
Lieberjosch: LEG BITER!!! IT'S THE LEG BITER!!!
Vinegar: Peterson has Pierce in the ankle lock!
Lieberjosch: NBK is standing over the masked Stone, staring down at the mask, he crouches close to it, and begins squeezing his head!
Vinegar: Pierce looks about to tap!
Covert Jay: Tacker clubs Peterson in the back of the head, breaks the hold!
Lieberjosch: NBK tears the mask off of Stone, and now he kicks Stone to the outside, and follows him out!
Vinegar: Tacker setting Peterson up for a powerbomb.
Lieberjosch: Knight back in the ring, what's that she's got?
Covert Jay: It's a baseball bat covered in light tubes!
Vinegar: JESUS CHRIST ON A POGO STICK!!!
Lieberjosch: She just cracked Tacker with that weapon!!
Vinegar: Hazel East telling her to leave the ring, Knight just laughs and hops out!
Lieberjosch: Hold on, NBK on the outside!
Covert Jay: RUMOUR HAS IT!!!!
Vinegar: Drilling Stone right into the barricade!
Lieberjosch: Hold on, look in the ring!
Vinegar: Pierce has rolled over and covered Tacker!
ONE!!!
TWO!!!
THREE!!!!!
Dennis: Here is your winner, TRAVIS PIEERRRRCCEEEEEE!!!!
Vinegar: Pierce gets the victory!
Lieberjosch: But the real story is the damage done by Abigail Knight and the Natural Born Killer!
Vinegar: And Chris Peterson stands in the ring, looking back and forth at the two of them, what is going through this kid's head, just one week before he'll team with not only both of them, but Donovan Hastings himself!
Covert Jay: Don't go anywhere, we'll be right back!
One by one, various members of the hierarchy of UGWC staff file out of
the arena dutifully. Lowly janitors, ring technicians, A/V experts, vendors,
and the like march into the parking lot, most of them smoking them (if they
have them), and treating this like an unexpected break before the big show.
In one corner of the parking lot, removed from the underpaid rabble, the
Consortium stand making various reactions to this development. Hope
Paulson busily examines a desktop size dayplanner, reading appointments
off to Moss Edwards. Intern Todd hastily scratches his fingertips across the
surface of his Ipad screen while Robert Ooley twists Louis in his hands
impatiently. Dexter Vines simply vociferates into his cell phone at an
ever-increasing volume. Clearly, whatever is going on is unexpected.
Janitor A: A fumigation? On a Monday?
Janitor B: Something about unwanted pests living in the bowels of the
arena.
Janitor A: I wish we’d been told about this. I just waxed the serving lines in
Concourse 12.
Janitor B: I was in the break room, watching a recap of the Saints and 49ers.
Janitor A: You watch the preseason? Who watches the preseason?
The din of the crowd lessens palpably when the members of the Circle
begin their exit, accompanying their master in a protective ring.
Janitor A: Creepy lot, that.
Janitor B: I’ll say. I bet they watch the preseason.
Janitor A: Dude. No one watches the preseason.
A rumble, crash, and guttural roar announces the forcible removal of the
World Heavyweight Champion from the arena, and to everyone’s surprise,
he is handcuffed to a thick rail tie behind his back. Regardless, he manages
to swing it with enough leverage to gut check a couple of security guards
before someone tranqs him, and seven or so crew members drag him out
of sight behind the dumpsters.
Everyone mills around a bit, but something suddenly feels off.
Janitor A: Hey, what’s the count on A/V guys lately?
Janitor B: Sixteen, but they mess up like thirty. Why?
Janitor A: Unless we hired some new guys this week, somebody got their
uniforms mixed up. There’s twenty three of them.
The Janitors take a moment to recount, but one stops suddenly.
Janitor B: That’s Sheena Ramone…
Before his associate can pick her out, seven of the ‘new’ A/V staff reach
beneath their UGWC ball caps and pull down cloths to cover their faces. On
each cloth is a hastily rendered drawings of Prince Rudo’s mask.
Janitor A: Oh, crap.
Eyes glance back and forth like a tennis match for a few moments, waiting
for Prince Rudo to notice this mockery. Hope Paulson is the first to see it,
however, and she clears her throat enough for all three members of the
Consortium to look up, first at her, then at the masks. Everyone’s gaze is
locked on the seven covered faces, except Paulson’s, who is trying
impossibly to read the reaction of said Prince.
He is watching.
Convinced they have his attention, each of the disguised demonstrators
reveals from behind them a paintbrush dripping with black paint. And, as one, each of them paints a swath across the caricatures depicting the prince.
The Consortium tenses, the unnamed other staff members back away quickly, and the demonstrators stare directly at the Circle.
Suddenly an explosion from inside, a cloud of curses, and a billow of white insecticide breaks up the tension. When the toxic mist clears, everyone has scattered to escape the noxious fumes, and the demonstrators are gone.
Vinegar: Welcome, one and all, to UGWC Synergy!
Covert Jay: Huttah!
Vinegar: We are just a week away from Outlast, and I don't know about you, but I can't wait!
Lieberjosch: Tyvola will face the biggest challenge of his World Title reign, as he must defend against the entire promotion!
Vinegar: Our six captains have been forming their teams, still some selections yet to be made, we hope to have all that information for you by the end of the night, but first, let's get to the action!
"You Know My Name" hits as the stage pyros explode, and as the music softens Travis Pierce emerges from backstage and walks down the ramp to the ring.
Dennis: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, representing the Human Resources Department, TRAVIS PIEEEERRRRRCCCCCEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Vinegar: Travis Pierce got back on the winning track last week, beating three others. We'll see if he can continue on that path tonight, against five.
Lieberjosch: Poppycock, what's really opportunity is that he gets things together for next week so he doesn't let the Human Resources Department down yet again.
"Headstrong" plays, and two spotlights aim to the top of the ramp as Steven Stone walks out. He looks around the arena, smiles before looking to the ring. The smile goes from his face as he reaches the ring. He rolls in before taking a deep breath to calm his nerves.
Dennis: Introducing next, the Prodigy, STEVEN STOOOOOOONNNEEEEE!!!!
Vinegar: Stone picked up his first victory here in UGWC last week.
Lieberjosch: He managed to look like a fluke winning over Savana of all people.
Covert Jay: A former Cross-Hemisphere Champion, I'd point out.
Lieberjosch: You would.
"How to Make a Monster" plays as the Natural Born Killer stalks to the ring.
Dennis: Introducing next, he is the reigning Chaos Champion, the NATURALLL BORRNN KILLLLERRRRRR!!!!
Vinegar: We know already that NBK will be a member of Team Hastings at Outlast.
Lieberjosch: He's a hired gun, and that's a role he's certain to be fantastic at.
"Dying Breed" hits over the PA system as Kyle Tacker steps out from the back, his arms held high and his middle finger extended on both hands. He lowers his arms as he starts to walk down the ring, stopping halfway to flip the fans off some. He quickly climbs up the steel steps, and enters the ring through the second rope. He then stands in the center of the ring and raises his arms once more to flip the fans off again with both middle fingers, and turns and stares at Pierce.
Dennis: And now entering the ring, the One Man Riot, KYLE TACKERRRR!!!!!
Vinegar: We understand there is bad blood between Pierce and Tacker, going back several years.
Lieberjosch: Kyle Tacker packs quite a punch, he could make a real impact next week for his team.
Vinegar: Thank you for entirely ignoring the details I was expositing.
Lieberjosch: Nothing about Pierce matters until he starts doing his job again.
Strobe lights start up, right about the time that the music hits, hard and fast and heavy as Shiner starts playing. Smoke has filled the floor of the stage and then she bursts through it, heading straight for the ring. She walks swiftly and with purpose and jumps up on the ring, grabbing the top rope and flipping herself into the ring over the top rope.
Dennis: Now entering the ring, making her UGWC debut, ABIGAIL KNIGHT!!!!
Vinegar: Abigail Knight finally making her debut, we expected it a couple weeks ago, delayed until tonight, hopefully worth the wait.
Covert Jay: Abby Knight is known as the Devil's Daughter, she's quite a firecracker, this is exciting.
Lieberjosch: Word is that Miss Knight will be a part of Team Hastings at Outlast.
Vinegar: Speaking of which, hold on a second, Owen Peterson is on the stage!
Covert Jay: It's megaphone time!
Peterson: Yo hold on just uh second down dere, Mitchell. Ah gots dis here covered, so you keep yo' mouf shut.
Dennis: Whatever.
Peterson: Introducing, uh key member o' Team Niggalicious, da Black Knight, CHRIS PEEEEDERRRRSONNNNN!
Vinegar: Chris Peterson on the stage, appears to be wearing a tin garbage can lid on his head.
Covert Jay: It's his helmet!
Vinegar: ...and holding a wooden sword.
Covert Jay: Well, every knight needs a sword!
Lieberjosch: Chris Peterson, clearly embracing the teaching of the Lord.
Vinegar: Chris Peterson, clearly embarassed seems more like it.
Lieberjosch: Don't forget that Chris picked up the win for his team last night, able to overcome having to team with Jet Somers, he accomplished it with the support of Lord Hastings, you would have never seen Chris Peterson be able to do that a month ago.
Vinegar: Owen has gone backstage, Chris Peterson entering the ring now.
Lieberjosch: The Natural Born Killer snatches the lid off his head, and he smacks Stone with it!
Covert Jay: See? Teammates working together already.
DING DING!
Vinegar: Hazel East is going to have a lot of trouble keeping order in this match, which finally gets underway, NBK snuck that foreign object attack in before the bell.
Lieberjosch: He's the Chaos Champion, he knows how and when to use weapons.
Vinegar: Kyle Tacker goes right after Pierce.
Covert Jay: But he's cut off by Knight, who knocks him down with a missile dropkick.
Vinegar: And the Natural Born Killer knocks Pierce down with a clothesline.
Lieberjosch: Keep in mind that three of the six people in this match are going to be on the same team next week at Outlast.
Vinegar: And two of them are probably completely unbalanced.
Covert Jay: That's not nice to say about Chris Peterson, he's in a tough spot.
Vinegar: I wasn't talking about him.
Lieberjosch: NBK dropping a knee on Pierce, Knight stomping away on Tacker!
Vinegar: And Chris Peterson is just leaning back in a corner, watching the two of them!
Lieberjosch: See? Hastings as taught him well.
Vinegar: I think he's trying to figure out how to cope with having to team with these two, as Stone is coming back into the ring.
Covert Jay: He's got his mask on!
Vinegar: Peterson takes Stone by the arm, twists into a hammerlock.
Covert Jay: But Stone counters right into the Prodigy Exception!
Vinegar: Stone knocks a charging Knight down with a right hand!
Lieberjosch: Now one for NBK!
Covert Jay: He's on fire!
Vinegar: Stone takes down Knight with an arm drag that sends her sprawing out of the ring.
Lieberjosch: Now hits an enziguri kick on NBK!
Vinegar: Stone going to the top rope, steadies himself on the turnbuckle, leaps for splash!
Lieberjosch: But Kyle Tacker steps in the way and catches him!
Covert Jay: FALL IN!!!
Vinegar: A fall away slam by Tacker, Pierce grabs him!
Lieberjosch: Breakdown!
Vinegar: Pierce covers!
ONE!!!
Vinegar: Chris Peterson breaks it up!
Lieberjosch: Pierce to his feet, swings for a clothesline!
Vinegar: Peterson ducks it!
Covert Jay: Chop block!
Vinegar: Peterson grabs him by the leg!
Lieberjosch: LEG BITER!!! IT'S THE LEG BITER!!!
Vinegar: Peterson has Pierce in the ankle lock!
Lieberjosch: NBK is standing over the masked Stone, staring down at the mask, he crouches close to it, and begins squeezing his head!
Vinegar: Pierce looks about to tap!
Covert Jay: Tacker clubs Peterson in the back of the head, breaks the hold!
Lieberjosch: NBK tears the mask off of Stone, and now he kicks Stone to the outside, and follows him out!
Vinegar: Tacker setting Peterson up for a powerbomb.
Lieberjosch: Knight back in the ring, what's that she's got?
Covert Jay: It's a baseball bat covered in light tubes!
Vinegar: JESUS CHRIST ON A POGO STICK!!!
Lieberjosch: She just cracked Tacker with that weapon!!
Vinegar: Hazel East telling her to leave the ring, Knight just laughs and hops out!
Lieberjosch: Hold on, NBK on the outside!
Covert Jay: RUMOUR HAS IT!!!!
Vinegar: Drilling Stone right into the barricade!
Lieberjosch: Hold on, look in the ring!
Vinegar: Pierce has rolled over and covered Tacker!
ONE!!!
TWO!!!
THREE!!!!!
Dennis: Here is your winner, TRAVIS PIEERRRRCCEEEEEE!!!!
Vinegar: Pierce gets the victory!
Lieberjosch: But the real story is the damage done by Abigail Knight and the Natural Born Killer!
Vinegar: And Chris Peterson stands in the ring, looking back and forth at the two of them, what is going through this kid's head, just one week before he'll team with not only both of them, but Donovan Hastings himself!
Covert Jay: Don't go anywhere, we'll be right back!
x2
