Post by Lord Hastings on Feb 13, 2012 21:49:01 GMT -5
Pyrotechnics explode, camera phones flash, fans scream, and a creeping realisation creeps across the minds of a few of you, this kinda feels familiar, but not in a 'we see this every week' kinda way, but in a nervous, you know what's about to happen way.
For those of you who are relatively new, or rejoining after a lengthy absence this is not how we usually open a show, usually you'd get some generic banter between our 3 man commentary team, and obligatory 'Huttah!' and a brief run down of what is to come over the course of the show.
Unfortunately sometimes we are unable to give you the usual, expected formula, some people think this is a good thing, and those that don't have yet to mention it. This is due to the fact that we all have lives and understandably not everyone in our little community can write matches every week, or ever.
In the past that has led to me having near nervous breakdowns, putting pressure on myself to write more than is healthy for a person like myself, that is someone who absolutely despises writing wrestling matches. Sure sometimes I get an idea and enjoy writing a match with some psychology or a nice angle etc, but if I have to start from scratch and just create something worth reading in match form, I get the urge to hunt you all down and kill you one by one with a rusty spoon.
So thus the 'Robcap' was born, in an attempt to keep this place running and make the schedule tick over well without major delays. It's important this is not known as a 'Recap' because generally there is very little mention of what is happening in the ring or in the company itself. It generally just a stream of consciousness on my part. For instance in the time it's taken us to get this far, our first match is just seconds away from starting, with Hastings and Enigma getting ready to square off.
Now lets be honest, does anyone really care that this match is getting the 'Robcap' treatment, with all respect to Donovan. You see, just a quick glance at this weeks promo's will point you in the direction of the obvious winner. To make you all struggle through my attempts to wrangle my weak grasp of the English language into an interesting match up, when you already know what's going to happen, would be a waste of all of our time. In many ways I'm doing you a service, if you hate this kinda crap, just skip past it.
Just for the record though, the match is under way and 'the Lord of Pain' is dominating, which is hardly a shock to anyone.
Anyway, I wasn't even meant to be writing at all tonight, but shit happen y'know? So you're left with this, and it seems as good a place as any to make a shocking confession.
I no longer wish Bret Hart to take a hard kick to the temple. Shocking huh?
Don't get me wrong, I still believe a lot of the shit I always have, but at the end of the day I can respect what he did in the ring, and his understanding of many aspects of the business. I may go into it in more depth if I ever feel the urge or becomes relevant, but just thought I'd throw it out there.
Speaking of throwing out, that's just what Hastings has done to Enigma, and is slamming his head against the steel guard rail and seems to be asking him why he thinks anyone thinks of either he or Tacker when Chaos is mentioned? And he has a point, nowadays you think Abigail Knight, because she's consistent and coincidentally is the Chaos Champion, which is all that matters in respect to that division.
See now I'm losing some steam, it's been a long, tough few days so if I seem snarky, apologies. But I'm not apologising for the Robcap I'm afraid, it's always a possibility on Synergy, but most of you knew that already, and if ya didn't now ya do.
So I hope you all enjoy the rest of this show despite an opening match that hasn't really happened, and I'm sure Steve will do a great job, he seems to have resisted the cynicism that has grown inside me so I know this'll be the last of the suckage for the evening.
So relish the rest of this show, relish your Champion vs Champion vs Champion Main Event. Because, remember, a Robcap can happen at any time.
And I'll leave you with that thought as the bell rings and Hastings is declared the winner, and then goes crazy and continues to beat down Enigma, which seems extremely unnecessary given the fact he'd already made him look like a partially blind pan handler throughout the match anyway. Yet attack him he does, all the whilst screaming that it is Moss Edwards' fault. And if your wondering why he's saying that, may I suggest actually reading the work of those that do post, especially Donny cause it's not like War and Peace (The over long, but great, novel, NOT Ezekiel and Marek), and is certainly funnier.
Now for what you actually expected.
For those of you who are relatively new, or rejoining after a lengthy absence this is not how we usually open a show, usually you'd get some generic banter between our 3 man commentary team, and obligatory 'Huttah!' and a brief run down of what is to come over the course of the show.
Unfortunately sometimes we are unable to give you the usual, expected formula, some people think this is a good thing, and those that don't have yet to mention it. This is due to the fact that we all have lives and understandably not everyone in our little community can write matches every week, or ever.
In the past that has led to me having near nervous breakdowns, putting pressure on myself to write more than is healthy for a person like myself, that is someone who absolutely despises writing wrestling matches. Sure sometimes I get an idea and enjoy writing a match with some psychology or a nice angle etc, but if I have to start from scratch and just create something worth reading in match form, I get the urge to hunt you all down and kill you one by one with a rusty spoon.
So thus the 'Robcap' was born, in an attempt to keep this place running and make the schedule tick over well without major delays. It's important this is not known as a 'Recap' because generally there is very little mention of what is happening in the ring or in the company itself. It generally just a stream of consciousness on my part. For instance in the time it's taken us to get this far, our first match is just seconds away from starting, with Hastings and Enigma getting ready to square off.
Now lets be honest, does anyone really care that this match is getting the 'Robcap' treatment, with all respect to Donovan. You see, just a quick glance at this weeks promo's will point you in the direction of the obvious winner. To make you all struggle through my attempts to wrangle my weak grasp of the English language into an interesting match up, when you already know what's going to happen, would be a waste of all of our time. In many ways I'm doing you a service, if you hate this kinda crap, just skip past it.
Just for the record though, the match is under way and 'the Lord of Pain' is dominating, which is hardly a shock to anyone.
Anyway, I wasn't even meant to be writing at all tonight, but shit happen y'know? So you're left with this, and it seems as good a place as any to make a shocking confession.
I no longer wish Bret Hart to take a hard kick to the temple. Shocking huh?
Don't get me wrong, I still believe a lot of the shit I always have, but at the end of the day I can respect what he did in the ring, and his understanding of many aspects of the business. I may go into it in more depth if I ever feel the urge or becomes relevant, but just thought I'd throw it out there.
Speaking of throwing out, that's just what Hastings has done to Enigma, and is slamming his head against the steel guard rail and seems to be asking him why he thinks anyone thinks of either he or Tacker when Chaos is mentioned? And he has a point, nowadays you think Abigail Knight, because she's consistent and coincidentally is the Chaos Champion, which is all that matters in respect to that division.
See now I'm losing some steam, it's been a long, tough few days so if I seem snarky, apologies. But I'm not apologising for the Robcap I'm afraid, it's always a possibility on Synergy, but most of you knew that already, and if ya didn't now ya do.
So I hope you all enjoy the rest of this show despite an opening match that hasn't really happened, and I'm sure Steve will do a great job, he seems to have resisted the cynicism that has grown inside me so I know this'll be the last of the suckage for the evening.
So relish the rest of this show, relish your Champion vs Champion vs Champion Main Event. Because, remember, a Robcap can happen at any time.
And I'll leave you with that thought as the bell rings and Hastings is declared the winner, and then goes crazy and continues to beat down Enigma, which seems extremely unnecessary given the fact he'd already made him look like a partially blind pan handler throughout the match anyway. Yet attack him he does, all the whilst screaming that it is Moss Edwards' fault. And if your wondering why he's saying that, may I suggest actually reading the work of those that do post, especially Donny cause it's not like War and Peace (The over long, but great, novel, NOT Ezekiel and Marek), and is certainly funnier.
Now for what you actually expected.