Subpar and Predictable Battleground (Results Within)

[The Forgotten One]

So I'm having real trouble sleeping tonight, I get up to check in on Battleground...

RVD lost to Alberto Del Rio (no title change)
A J Lee beat Brie Bella (no title change)
Curtis Axel beat R Truth (no title change)
Daniel Bryan vs Randy Orton went to a no contest (Big Show KO'd them both? what, huh? no title change)

Undercard stuff:

Brey Wyatt over Kofi Kingston (no Kane return? Well, blah)
Rhodes Family defeated The Shield (figured this one, but was still fun to see that Duthhh-tay got involved, and afterwards they Rhodes' boys went and had a beer)
The Real Americans (with the Swiss guy) defeated The Great Khali and Santino Morella (why? Just....why?)
Dolph Ziggler defeated Damien "I Look Like Donovan Hastings, only not as awesome" Sandow (why give him a Money in the Bank contract and then use him as a chump?)
CM Punk defeated Ryback after Heyman accidently distracted the ref and Punk used a Mule Kick to the Man Parts to fell the Human Wreckingball

Guys and gals, i will tell you this right now....our Battleground is going to run laps around this 49.95 piece of garbage. If you smell what the Jim is cookin', gimme a Hell Yeah, or at least some garlic powder.

[Who Am I?]

1) ADR def RVD. Seriously, I'm not expecting RVD to get his "big gold belt" lifetime achievement award just yet. He'll hold that belt as a "thank you" to the business the same way Mark Henry, Big Show, Kane and others have gotten to carry that belt. That's all its worth anymore along with getting future WWE Champions over for a while. But for now, ADR is doing fine with it.

2) AJ def Brie. You can't take the title off the hottest female star since Trish and Lita to hotshot it onto someone as an engagement present.

3) Axel def. R-Truth. I could've told you that three weeks ago that Truth doesn't win this match.

4) Bryan vs Orton, no contest. This intrigues me. I would love to see them do another Deadly Games Tournament... but I doubt that will happen.

5) Bray def Kofi. Kofi needs to be repackaged ASAP. He is as wasted as R Truth.

6) Rhodes def Shield. Okay, cool. What was the point of that now?

7) Real Americans def. Khali and Santino. I'm pretty sure the Real Americans deserve something better, but I'm not sure how they fit into anything else right now. The midcard belts are tied up in the Heyman thing with Axel and the HHH thing with The Shield so they can't go win those things. The tag titles are still on The Shield and we can't have a heel vs heel feud between the Americans and The Shield. So... they're kinda stuck in limbo right now. Stuff like this is their immediate future to remain relevant.

8) Ziggy def Sandow. I like how you're asking about the MITB contract on Sandow making him look like a chump when a year ago we were saying the same thing about Ziggler. I think we can officially call the Dolph Ziggler push dead at this point, though. Shame, because I really thought he'd get a real run with a belt. He's already done what his "generational predecessors" Mr Perfect and Billy Gunn couldn't, but I'd really love to see this kid get a real shot. He's not just an "upper midcard filler" that those previous two are, but they're booking him as such for the last few months. I'd appreciate a feud with someone worth a damn. As for Sandow, it's the curse of the MITB contract. They can't make you super awesome because it will overshadow the threat of cashing in at any time. Ziggler won like 7 matches in the whole year with that contract and one of them was over Cena. Ultimately, we know some face is going to beat ADR and then Sandow will cash in. Then *poof* insta-feud.

9) Punk def. Ryback. So we're back to this, are we? Shoe is on the other foot from just under a year ago. So, let me get this straight. Ryback is the Human Wrecking Ball (Miley Cyrus jokes aside...) but he can't get a PPV win unless it's over Jericho with his tights pulled, or it's against a couple jobbas. He's another they really dropped the ball on. They had something going with his face run early on, but they booked themselves into a corner at HIAC 2012 and all that Brad Maddox shit. All the air came out of that push once he lost again at Survivor Series, TLC, Rumble and Elimination Chamber... one after another.


Another shit card that is not worth the fifty bucks. This is why I only buy 2 PPV's a year. Wrestlemania and Royal Rumble. Mania because, well, it's Mania. Rumble because it's my favorite gimmick PPV and I love the Rumble match.

[DrunkenBuzzsaw]

The last PPV I bought was the Wrestlemania that had the shitfest that WWE called the Goldberg/Lesnar match.

[Jet Somers]

I remember that's when WWE stood for worst wrestlemania ever

[Lord Hastings]

Oct 7, 2013 13:47:49 GMT -5 Jet Somers said:

I remember that's when WWE stood for worst wrestlemania ever

You're referring to the Wrestlemania that probably the best main event of any WM with Benoit/HHH/HBK, had a co-main event of Eddie/Kurt, a great undercard match in Christian/Jericho, and while the match was garbage, the return of the Dead Man, which was a great moment live. The show also opened with a BELOVED John Cena, in his doctor of thuganomics days. 20 was far from the worst WM. The previous year you had HBK/Jericho, Rock/Austin, and Angle/Lesnar. The following year you had Eddie/Rey, original MITB, Taker/Orton, and HBK/Angle. So not sure where you're getting that from.

As for the WWE Battleground, the result sound more or less like what I expected. RVD is scheduled to take time off, so he wasn't winning, but reviews say the match was decent. I consider AJ retaining a miracle because at some point they are going to give it to somebody from the Divas show. The filler Real Americans match was just to get Cesaro swinging Khali around on PPV. Bryan/Orton was never going to have a clear winner with HiaC just a few weeks away. I love CM Punk, but have no need to see him face Ryback. This event had skippable written all over it.

[Seito Risa]

All the face push for "Feed me, Seymour!" Ryback was was just a carbon copy Goldberg gimmick. This after rebranding him from Sheffield of The Nexus previously. This guy really needs a fresh makeover. Power wrestlers can have better gimmicks than this poor guy gets stuck with.

I wasn't here a year ago, so how do you know that I was having fun talking about Zigglesworth during his BS time with the MITB contract?

The point of the Rhodes/Shield match was to reinstate Cody now that he is back from his Honeymoon (you know, since he got him some, he's been a lot less annoying...)

AJ/Brie...AJ just annoys me. Girl is talented, no doubt, though I think Lita and Trish are in a class of their own, but if they would just get rid of the schizo schtick and let her just be a carefree spirit who can tie an opponent in knots, that'd work better for me.

Okay. Tonight is all about enjoying these two home grilled chili cheese dogs with crinkle cut fries and writing awesomeness.

Woo-woo!

[Jet Somers]

I just didn't enjoy a single minute of it

[Seito Risa]

What about the married and engaged moments? Or the divorced moments?